Monday 11 November 2024

DOING HIS WILL

In all the chaos and turmoil, I feel a sense of peace. In all the inadequacy in the eyes of others, why do I feel complete and satisfied? If one moment I am angry and agitated at what goes on in society, the nation, and elsewhere, the next moment just as a breeze comes to cool us in the heat of the day, a peace and calmness that makes the breath still descends on me. So is it when watching a movie, the breath stills. What could that be? Meditation in action without the need to sit to meditate. Spontaneous meditation where the senses though occupied in an activity, bring their attention to the breath that is stilled. How amazing. It is truly a gift as I cannot bring myself to go beyond my attempt in sitting and trying. This has to be what Agathiyar mentioned as I need not do anything and the energy aroused in me shall do its work. Peace dwells all around me though there are brief moments of agitation and disturbances. Agathiyar had told me to bear with them in the initial years of my trying to sit to meditate. He told me that these trials and tribulations exist even if I were to head into the jungles to meditate. 

Nothing is my doing for sure. Agathiyar sees to it that it all falls into place at the right time. I asked Tavayogi why I came to the path only at 43 years of age and not earlier. He snubbed me as he would in the years of tutorship to him in the years to come, telling me to be grateful at least I came then. Going by what he said, many I believe never see this path in their lifetime. There was always a time for everything to take place I understand now. Why did Lord Siva come in a dream to stop my questions and have them put on hold till a later date that came some 14 years later when I understood the reasons for people's sufferings from my personal account of Karma revealed in my first Nadi reading in 2002? Why did some 15 candidates reject me until my present wife agreed to marry me? Why did my second daughter come after some nine years after our elder? Why did I drop taking meat, fish, and eggs overnight in 1998 and became a vegetarian after she was born, for no reason? Who can answer all these mysteries? There was always a time for each event to unfold which is a mystery indeed.

None of these words is mine. It just keeps coming to me as I begin to type them. I end up reading it again and again for it is a teaching for me too. It is as if Shanmugam Avadaiyappa has stepped aside and Agathiyar is writing these posts. What is happening now? How is this possible?

Sri Daya Mata writes in the Preface to "God Talks With Arjuna: The Bhagavad Gita", by Paramahansa Yogananda.

He was completely absorbed, completely at one with the truths he was perceiving within and expressing outwardly.

“I dictate scriptural interpretations and letters all day,” Paramahansaji wrote to a student during this period, “with eyes closed to the world, but open always in heaven.”

She writes in the Afterword.

One day, after many months of work on the Bhagavad Gita at the desert ashram, Paramahansa Yogananda was staying for a time at the Self-Realization Fellowship Hermitage by the ocean in Encinitas, California. It was nearly three o’clock in the morning; for many hours that night, he had been intensely concentrated on his Gita translation and commentary. Finally, he turned to the disciple who had been sitting silently nearby. 

“You have tonight been greatly blessed to witness the end of the work I came to fulfill. I have finished the Gita. That task was given to me, and I made a promise that I would write this Gita — and it is done. All the Great Ones [i.e., the SRF Gurus] have been here in this room tonight, and I have conversed with them in Spirit. My life now is conditioned by minutes, hours, days — maybe years, I don’t know; it is in Divine Mother’s hands. I am living only by Her grace.”

Years earlier, Sri Yukteswarji had told him: “You perceive all the truth of the Bhagavad Gita as you have heard the dialogue of Krishna and Arjuna as revealed to Vyasa. Go and give that revealed truth with your interpretations: a new scripture will be born.”

“I have written this Gita as it came to me,” he said, “as I was united in ecstasy with my great Gurus and the originators of the Bhagavad Gita. The Gita that has come through me belongs to them. And I know what my Master said: ‘A new Gita, hitherto only partially exposed through centuries in the many lights of various explanations, is coming out in its full effulgence to bathe all true devotees of the world.’”

(Source: Yogananda and the Bhagavad Gita)

Yogananda Paramahansa's "Autobiography of a Yogi" did make a great impact on a lot of people including me. He was the first to introduce me to so many masters and saints, whose stories he covered in his autobiography.

I remember in the days when Velayutham Karthikeyan Aiya used to pen his blog "Siththan Arul", we used to message each other on FB Messenger. He used to share many things that were not posted on his blog. One of them was how he was instructed to write the blog. He was instructed by Agathiyar to post every Thursday. He would sit before his computer in the early morning hours before dawn waiting for a subject to write on. He would then feel a divine presence and hear the sound of breathing. Agathiyar would stand by his side and dictate the post. 

Yogi Ramaiah and his partner V.T. Neelakantan too similarly had many visitations from Babaji dictating what to write and share. 

Devi Ma revealed how Ramalinga Adigal came as a brilliant light with a form. He offered his hands and hugged her. It is understandable that when we hug each other we feel the other and their limbs and body. But here the moment he hugged her she was in the light and Ramalinga Adigal was formless. There was no form of him. The moment she took a step back, he was there in the form and shining bright. 

How amazing. All these go beyond logic and understanding. There is obviously more than what we see, hear, touch, sense, taste, and smell. We shall never know until we step into the shoes of these great souls or arrive at the spot where they once stood. How many of us actually dig up the history of the temples before their visit? How many actually stop to remind themselves of the arch where the saints of the past had passed through and the corridors, sanctums, and temple grounds they treaded and on which we stand today?

And so when I traveled to India in 2016 with the AVM members I took them to the Uthiyur hills on the long and winding path that Tavayogi took me on instead of a shorter path that some in the group had used earlier. It brought back fond memories to be to walking the path that my guru Tavayogi had walked and bringing others on the path too. 

As I am drafting this post a devotee of Agathiyar and a friend and part of the AVM family writes to me the following.

Vannakam aiya. OMG aiya, today's post "seeking eternal bliss" resonates 100%. The pleasure (with god), the pain, the weeds, suffocating, suffering, seeking safety perhaps a cave, endangered species, fighting for survival, harsh reality indeed. Aiya in the horrendous cage I am currently in (my reality which you wrote about), I  find so much peace and solace in the things and people you write about...my heart bursts with joy...sometimes even tears. You were instrumental in my journey aiya...father came through you to bring me on the path back to him, you, and swami (Tavayogi). 

What can I say further if it isn't Agathiyar's hand at work behind me? Agathiyar has chosen to bring solace and comfort to his devotees through these writings. I am but a tool only. After posting this, I messaged her "I shall be the first to read it."