We all die. Even the Siddhas die too. But death is different for them compared with us. Generally, if we need a reason to die and not to be born, looking deep we realize that there is always a reason for something to take place. The reason to die might be succumbing to a disease or an illness, a tragedy, or a road mishap, and at times it comes in unimaginable ways as in freak accidents. Then to those who believe in Karma, it is reason enough to take a birth.
If we are caught unaware by the missionary of death, Lord Yama, the Siddhas, saints, and sages tend to decide when to leave. My first guru Supramania Swami knew about his death and wrote it in his diary that was discovered by his son upon his death. The date coincided with his passing. He had told me that he would leave when he was 76 when I saw him last in 2005. The Siddhas welcome death while we fear it. Agathiyar too told me to welcome death for it was passing into another realm and world, and another body, gathering more experiences from further learning.
To borrow Gordon Matthew's words from his translation of Meykanda Devar’s "Shivagnana Botham", "By reason of the soul’s virtue in previous births", we are born anew into this world to our worldly parents. With the realization of the ever-existing Atma that had engineered this body, bringing in the breath and Prana and the elements from the Prapanjam, and forced to withdraw from the stage and moved behind the stage by the Ego, comes a renewed birth in this life itself. For those ignorant of the Self, a Guru comes by and points us to the Real Us, our Atma, and sets us on a discovery of a new birth and a new life.
First, there are the Sakalar, having come to rid the three impurities in them, Karmam, Mayai, and Anavam. It could come by through a guru in the physical form.
“To Sakalar, souls immersed in all three impurities, God comes as a Guru of human form, he imparts it concealing himself as a Guru.”
"By reason of the soul’s virtue in previous births, God, who has been immanent in the soul, making it known, now vouchsafing to take the form of a Guru, initiates the soul in the Saiva mysteries. The primal one himself teaches these souls as a Guru: for in the form of consciousness, he is in union (with him)."
"When because of the soul’s meritorious practices, the primal one enlightens the soul as a Guru… When God comes as a Guru and teaches the soul, the soul is made to see that the world of experience, evolved from Maya, is non-real. It ceases then to identify itself with the non-real and to depend upon it; and in so doing it discovers its oneness with God."
Then we have the Pralayakalar. They have Karmam and Anavam, the former being Vasanas that need to ripen and the latter the distinction that God and they are two entities, still remaining intact in them. It could come by through a guru in the form of deities and Gods and Goddesses appearing before them.
“To Pralayakalar, souls affected only by Anava and Karma, he comes as a Guru in Shiva’s form; he himself standing before them as Guru imparts true knowledge.”
Then there are the Vijnanakalar who do take birth too, but not due to past Karma but to realize his Self as one with the Divine, which he failed to see before. It could come by through as the dawning of Self-knowledge. Veeraswamy Krishnaraj in his comprehension of Arulnandi Shivachariyar’s "Shivagnana Siddhiyar", writes that,
“To Vijnanakalar, souls involved only in Anava, he comes as the inner principle of the soul’s consciousness; he himself appears, as true knowledge.”
"Vijnanakalar - the highest class of souls among the three mentioned in "Shivagnana Siddhiyar" with only one impurity known as Anava Malam, do not need an external Guru to instruct them. Lord Shiva by remaining inside them as the inner guide rids them of the Anava Malam, bringing the merits and demerits to a resolution and conferring spiritual knowledge or divine grace known as Saktinipata, the descent of Sakti into the soul. Vijnanakalar receives Gnana from Lord Shiva himself as the incorporeal inner guide."
These are the souls closely associated with God and practically sit at their feet and think about them day and night to the extent the very essence of God prevails in them. They are seen as God and Divine too.
God gives and god takes. He gives us our parents and takes them away later. He gives us a life partner and takes him or her away later. Finally, he gives us the breath and takes it away too. We leave behind the home that we had dwelt in during our lifespan to either rot or turn into ash. Along the way, we begin to accumulate things beginning with knowledge, and later wealth and property. Lord Shiva coming in a dream had me drop all my home puja, readings, and discussions. I left these for some 14 long years.
The Guru too gives and takes it back. Responding to the call to come to the path by Agathiyar in my first Nadi reading, after the 14-year hibernation, the divine began to shower me with gifts. The Nadi reader for a start gave me a booklet containing the names of all the Siddhas to recite. Sivabalan who brought in these readers gave me a painting of Agathiyar. Dr Krishnan, astrologer, Siddha physician, and friend, gave me Agathiyar's mantra to recite and a Yantra, a copper foil that was etched with a diagram to worship. He also gave me a Rasamani to wear. My first guru Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai in asking me to wear the nine-gem studded ring on my finger, fulfilled my desire to wear one that was a challenge I took up, when a gemstone dealer chased me out of his shop, telling me, a college student then, that I could not afford them. Meeting Tavayogi at a local ashram and having him come over to my humble home, he had me drop my affection towards him even before I could get attached. When I spent several days with Tavayogi at his Kallar Ashram in India he had me shed all the above too. I stopped wearing the gemstones and the Rasamani. He left me stark naked only with my thoughts.
Agathiyar who sent over several youths to join my family in the Pornami puja in 2013 and later had us carry out charity, had us wind up and go within in the wake of the pandemic. Agathiyar who had me commission his bronze statue in Swamimalai to be placed at a Brindavanam, decides to stay put in my home. He who came into my home in 2010 decided to leave for the home of another deity in 2022, asking me to go within henceforth. Changing his mind, he has his statue returned to my home accompanied by his wife Lobamitra Ma. Working on me subtly, and raising the dormant energies within, he has me do nothing these days.
How do we reason his moves? How do we perceive these changes? It is all his play. What is his purpose in giving us first only to remove it later? He is teaching us to be detached. Just as Tavayogi told me that I was living in Maya, he is showing us that it is all Maya, an impermanent and unreal world. So what then is real and lasting? The soul or Atma or JeevAtma. He wants us to know our Atma. This is Atma Darisanam. Once we know it we can carry on living in this world without being attached to its play of colors, shapes, and sizes. We live off in and in it but never are consumed in it. We remain detached. We remain as the Self, a witness.
This morning while taking my usual walk around the park, I saw two Indian women sitting on the bench chatting. What pulled my attention to them was that a piece of the sole in one sandal of one of them was missing. It was similar to what I had bought recently when my existing one snapped suddenly. If she walked, her feet would have to bear the heat of the road. After making several more rounds I came up before her and handed her some money telling her to get a new pair and buy both of them some food. She was visibly speechless and gave me an astonished look as I moved away. Coming another round, I saw her weeping into her palms. Stopping by, her friend tells me that she was crying. I moved on. Coming another round I saw that she was composed now. I moved on and returned home. What did take place then? I guess when I was moved to give her the cash, she must have been moved by my unprecedented move. I believe we are here to touch each other's life in multiple ways.
Going for a walk with my 4-year-old granddaughter, she started asking questions nonstop, one after another. I understood the reason being that she could not comprehend the world around her and all its happenings. This we carry on in our lives. After seeking answers from our parents and grandparents, we ask friends at school, college, and office mates. Later we sought answers from masters and gurus if we come by them. Man has never stopped seeking answers outside. But once he comes to know that all the answers are in him, his search stops. Speaking to an office colleague and long-time friend Muralidaran Saminathan who had pointed me to a Nadi reader in 2002 for my very first reading, that set my journey going, arriving at this moment, he zoomed immediately into the creative Sakti that flows through us, having recalled things that Tavayogi had told him back then. I shared the things Agathiyar said and my understanding of it with him too.
The Atma having studied its baggage of Karma to be disposed off, decides to make a comeback as a commoner. Or if it has a divine purpose to execute, it makes a comeback as in saints. It ropes in the Prapanjam and its creative energy Kundalini Prana Sakti to create a suitable dwelling for either of these purposes. It assembles the Tatvas or gross and subtle materials to build the vehicle and platform where it can make a comeback to discharge its Karma or execute its purpose respectively. The Kundalini Prana Sakthi that comes within to create this body according to the aspiration of the Atma that designed its home, creates the whole network of service lines and furnishes this home too. Upon completion of the dwelling, it begins to settle and resides in the Muladhara. Having built its home the Atma settles within too, taking on the tag JeevAtma now. It remains within reach of the bigger ParamAtma until a stipulated time that has no known equivalent in present times. As time goes by, with the emergence and strengthening of one's Ego that is fed through the senses and the happenings in one's life, the JeevAtma is driven behind into the shadows while the Ego takes reign. The JeevAtma if one comes to realize it, or a guru if one is destined to meet him, works towards drawing the veil aside. While the Atma in divine births attains Self-awareness, the guru has to help us common folks to realize the Atma. If in the saints Gnanam dawns on them and they are set free, in commoners like us the guru draws the veil of ignorance. Either way, the veil of ignorance is drawn aside and the JeevAtma sends the Ego to the gallows now. We learn to drop the veils and shatter and break the shackles and chains known as Malams that bond our Atma and keep us captive. The Atma and the guru then lead us on a specific path, bringing our sight within. We gain Atma Darisanam. Simultaneously, the journey for Sakthi to reunite with Siva begins in this very body. She is awakened again by the re-emergence of the Atma or the techniques given by the guru. The dormant creative energy makes its way up to the Sahasrara where Siva comes within as the Arutjothi to join in the dance of bliss. The Atma now freed, makes its getaway from the dungeons and soars into the skies freed at last. The JeevaAtma merges with the ParamAtma while still living. He becomes a Jeeva Mukta having attained Jeeva Mukti. He begins to show the others the way now. He becomes a beacon and a lighthouse.
We also spoke about vegetarianism. Who has to be a vegetarian? If one wants to transform this gross body into that of light it is a must for the process would go easier on him. It is not necessary if you do not intend to follow in the footsteps of Ramalinga Adigal. Most of us settle for the teachings of the Siddhas but stop short of implementing and following their dictates. We eventually end up being academians. We do not practice what we learn though we can talk about them and their ways. It needs discipline, dedication, and sincerity to follow the Siddhas. We need the courage to break free from ourselves and take hold of the Self. The Self shall guide us on or a guru who has been there shall come along.
Just as we are surprised to know of the true origin of the deity Karupanasamy as they say, from the horse's mouth, in the above video, I was surprised to follow the story of Sutasoma, an Indian prince's story that was written in dried palm leaves similar to the Nadi or Olai Suvadi made available to the host of BBC Earth's "The Mark Of Empire - Majapahit", Peter Lee to examine. In this story, another surprise awaited me, that of the Buddha and Lord Siva battling it out before becoming alliances. The Mark Of Empire - CNA (channelnewsasia.com)
Indeed each day surprises me. The crown of my head is soaked in "I don't know what" but the feeling is truly wonderful. As I pause often to take notes that come within or arise from within on my morning walk at the park as it does right now, I met a Chinese uncle Mr. Ronnie doing chin-ups and lifting his own weight. What he told me surprised me and shed all our norms on exercising. Mr. Ronnie never exercised in his life. He only started after the pandemic when he realized that he was weak. He was 66. Today at 72, he can do 8 chin-ups, runs 2 km, and has walked some 17000 steps in a day. Nothing is impossible he showed me. He is an inspiration to us all. He too says that we never give it a try. The notion that when one gets old one cannot exercise is defeated by Ronnie who proved it wrong.
I had shared some time back that a Chinese uncle in his 80s was playing basketball solo. There was an Indian housewife who cycled with her Chinese companions, their latest achievement being crossing over to Penang island using the old Penang bridge and returning to the mainland using the second bridge.
I had the privilege of meeting another Chinese uncle in his 80s who was a bodybuilder at a restaurant in my wife's hometown sometime back.
I had seen Chinese aunties in their 80s walk too. It is truly wonderful to see the elderly in the parks. At the same time, it is saddening to see others sulking at home. I learned today that age is not a factor. Age is no deterrent. It is our mind that sets the limits even before beginning. I learned from these wonderful people that it is never too late to begin exercising. Now I understand why Agathiyar told my father-in-law who was 83 back then that he should start doing Surya Namaskar and asked me to show him. Sadly he gave up even before he began. I left it at that.
Is Yoga very much Indian? Did the multi-races drop from the skies, each claiming its superiority? When did these initial distinctions between men come about, that have taken a grip and hold on us to the extent that people wipe out each other these days? This distinction has become a barrier to the expansion of universal love. Nature does not distinguish the good, the bad, and the ugly. The sun shines on all. The rain falls on all. The air does not restrict itself. The trees do not choose to provide shade to some and not to others. The grains and fruit do not decide whom they shall feed. Man has certainly changed from being pure in nature to becoming a horrible being. I keep telling myself not to follow in the footsteps of these horrid people and to stay clear lest they should influence me and drag me into the dungeons of hell too right here on earth. This does not mean that I am a saint. I too have my own weakness that I am working on before I leave so that I need not come back to work on it further in another birth.
On the same note, as it is, life is a mad rush, battling the city traffic to reach one's office in time or trying to reach in time for an appointment or meeting, trying to meet sales targets, etc. When people come to the park they still continue to push themselves to perform as if there is a target to achieve for the day or month. No one seems to enjoy nature for what it is. No one feels nature, breathes nature, touches nature, or tastes nature. It is all so robotic. As it is all the art forms are diminishing and fading away except for a few who try to keep them alive. Robots and AI can do what we did. Soon AI shall oust them of their seats and they shall be lost. Already my daughter tells me that AI is stealing our identities (faces) and assembling another. I was surprised to find out from a devotee friend who told me my face was replaced with another for a movie.
The original
The imposter
Kids and youngsters today take cues from adults who prefer to stare at their phones. They are no more creative. This blog and its contents are not advice to readers but to myself and my Manam or Self, bringing all the things seen, felt, tasted, heard, and touched to its attention, telling it what it should emulate and what it should not be. This is self-teaching. It is a study of men and their nature, preferences, likes and dislikes, and addiction. When I told a co-walker Mr Ong that I was addicted to walking he told me it was a good addiction. Indeed when phonography, drinking, and smoking have become addictions, bad-mouthing, and negative talk have become our nature, let us turn away from all this darkness and look towards the light.
The deity Karupanasamy seems to be closely related to the Siddhas. He and Lord Ganapathy are a common sight and are prayed to first, at the base of the mountain tracks leading to the abodes of the Siddhas, before the tracking begins. When the AVM family visited the many abodes of the Siddhas and the numerous temples en route to the Kallar ashram to participate in its inauguration in 2016, we were surprised by a priest at the foothill of Palani temple who seeing the 10 of us arrive, left the devotees he was attending to waiting and walked up to us to point out two things before we even took the very first step walking up the stairs to Palani hill temple. First, he pointed out the footprint embedded in the granite slab on the floor and certain figurines carved into the columns. Then he turned our sight to the shrine of Karupanasamy asking us to worship these before we walk up. We did as he told us. Even before the group left for India several devotees went over to get Karupanasamy's blessings. The deity coming through his devotee told us to be on the lookout for Agathiyar who shall surprise us. He added that Agathiyar could come in any form. He told us that Agathiyar would be there to usher us at the very first temple we visited. So we stayed vigilant throughout our visit to Sri Rangam temple. This too was an unprecedented change that came about. We were supposed to get Lord Ganapathy's grace and blessings at his abode the Uchi Pillayar temple the very moment we landed at Trichy airport. But as the sun was up and it was extremely hot, our chauffeur suggested that we visit Lord Ganapathy in the evening and head to Sri Rangam first. We did as he told us. True to what Karupanasamy said Agathiyar was there to receive us in the form of an old woman. Returning back to Malaysia several days later, Karupanasamy asked the devotees if they had met Agathiyar. He confirmed our meeting revealing the news that might shock all those who hold on to forms, images, names, tags, and labels. He told us that Agathiyan was a woman.
Recently we got the hint that Karupanasamy wants his devotees to revert to serving him Satvic meals and stop animal sacrifice and booze. Many stories are told of Karupanasamy but none as authentic as we see in this video.
Speaking to a devotee and friend over the phone some moments ago, it suddenly dawned on me the reason Agathiyar had me carry out, or rather he carried out our 6oth wedding and called my children and us to explain its inner meaning, which was followed by Lord Muruga asserting that there was nothing further to do. In having the wedding the children were to let go of their dependency on us and we were to step into the next phase of knowing the Self. In having us do nothing further, we have all the time to ponder on our life's events and happenings. This last phase is one of introspection and correcting the wrongs so that we do not need to come back again. We can watch our movie screened now and not after we leave the body. We can study and analyze what we had done, and whether our life was a purposeful one. We can seek forgiveness now itself for our wrongdoings rather than taking another birth to make good the wrongs. So if I have hurt anyone by any means please forgive me and let us move on. We can learn to let go of whatever remaining bondage we are holding on to.
It is story time now. We can bring joy to other's lives by sharing our stories and experiences. If one has written an autobiography his story is there for others to read and know. I believe my story is told well in this blog and the numerous e-books I have made available on the net. The videos that I have uploaded on my YouTube channel too should tell a story of our journey to a certain extent. I guess I shall use the rest of my time till my time is up in writing and sharing them with my readers.
This nation is heaven. There is a potpourri of beliefs, faiths, traditions, cultures, languages, food, and so many more. It's a culmination of all the best from all its people. It is a centre of learning and knowledge. What do you want? It is all here. It is just a matter of whether you want to reach out for it and grab your take. I'm glad my dad came over from India. I am glad my maternal grandparents came over and settled here even earlier. My dad married my mother who was a local then. I am thankful to them to have raised me and all my siblings through the best of times and also through trying periods and the war.
Next in line are my siblings who journeyed together. Then came my wife, joining me on my journey, in 1989, giving her entire self to me and the kids. I thank my parents-in-law for raising her up and delivering her to me. We brought up two wonderful daughters who journeyed together on the path of the Siddhas since 2002 when Agathiyar came into our lives again through a Nadi reading. Then Agathiyar sent new seekers who became our friends and family too. Today our grandchildren have joined us in praising the Siddhas too. It has been a fabulous journey. This post is to take a moment to honor them all.
Why do I share other's stories on this blog? Just as our gross body is made up of Tatvas we are made up of stories. Of course, since we cannot live all the lives of others, we can surely learn a lesson or two from their experiences. We can take the lessons they have learned and apply them in our lives. A story others tell gets distorted over time unless it is an autobiography.
If we had followed the story of Little Red Riding Hood for ages retold by our parents without questioning its logic, kids these days are quick to capture the many flaws in these children's stories. Besides that, they are quick to adapt these stories to present-day scenarios and needs. Narrating this story to my eldest granddaughter some years back when she was younger, she surprised us by telling us "Why go through the forest and put ourselves in danger of the wolf, I shall send grandma the cookies by GrabFood." GrabFood is a food delivery service in Malaysia. Just as my granddaughter adapted the story of Little Red Riding Hood to present times, we too should learn to adopt stories, practices, and methods to the present. Stories have the magic to clear our ignorance. But though many come by to help us rid of it, at times the veil is so thick we do not realize our ignorance and we continue to live in it.
Here is my story, though nothing to shout about, in brief. I was given in adoption to the Chinese gods back then as an infant in 1959, when I was having diarrhea. My parents had lost two kids to it earlier. So fearing for my life, they placed me before the Chinese gods at a neighbor's home altar and prayed. I survived the ordeal. Since then I sought refuge in these Chinese gods for all my ailments until a dog bit me when I was 13 and had to have an injection fearing rabies. 30 years later in 2002, the calling came from Agathiyar through the Nadi to come to the path of the Siddhas. The Siddhas felt it was time to recall me back home. But it was not an instant time travel to their realm. I had a gross body to work on first. Agathiyar and the Siddhas began to guide me and give me methods and practices in the Nadi to prepare my body for the internal journey that was to come my way. Agathiyar sent Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar Ashram in India to our shores in 2005. He took me on an external journey first exploring the world of the Siddhas hidden in our very midst when I followed him to India a couple of months after his departure. In 2007 he gave us a treasure in the form of Asanas and Pranayama techniques that would turn the world and the house upside down. Unknown to me the creative energy Kundalini that created and winded up, settling within in all of its creation once its work was done, arose in the Muladhara. Its impact only became obvious several years later between the years 2011 and 2012 in the form of excruciating pain in the lower back that crippled me. But Agathiyar was there to see that no harm came to me. They treated me in mysterious ways just as the Chinese gods did back then. Though this pain was relieved it came back in 2016 and later in 2018. It was attended to by Dhanvantri and Lord Muruga promptly.
In 2022, a sudden swirl and burst and release of this energy that had meanwhile stagnated and ponded at the Manipuraka at the navel region had me witness myself lying dead as a log. I was pretty aware of this state and witness to it. It was not an out-of-body experience but on the contrary, I was fully aware and witnessed how a dead body would feel or rather would be lifeless. Within the next couple of days, this energy made its way as in the rapids to reach the Sahasrara where it began to swirl again for days to come. Was this the dance of joy of Siva after Sakti merges back with him?
The swirling transformed into what felt like the opening of petals that went on and on. Was this the flowering, a result of their love for each other?
Then the prodding of another energy resulted in a throbbing sensation. Was this the entry of the effulgence Arutjothi?
Following this, Agathiyar tells me that now there was nothing more to do for the energy shall do its work. Lord Murugan came along to ask to sit still.
Thank you readers for your continued readership. The past week's figures tell the story.
If we think our fate is in the hands of God, God's fate too is in the hands of certain authorities and people. The granite statue of Agathiyar that Tavayogi installed in the Kallar hills has been removed by the authorities. The ashram at Agathiyar Vanam in Kallar that Agathiyar pointed out to Tavayogi to set up upon terminating his four years of Tavam in Sadduragiri is in ruins now. We understand that devotees are allowed to Pothigai Peak but no form of ritual is allowed now. What was once a place of convergence of floods of devotees at some point in time becomes deserted, buried, erased, or wiped out. All these point us to the fact that nothing is permanent on the face of the earth even if it was God's wish and desire. He is teaching us something here. If only we could see through the veil of Maya and understand.
Let us not hold on to anything less we are hurt later. Enjoy the moment. Take in the pleasures. Work on the Self or Atma that is forever in existence rather than spend our effort and time on things that shall perish over time. The JeevAtma is divine by nature having its source in the ParamAtma. Acknowledging that we are a part of the whole and that the whole is in all just like in us is all that is required to arrive there. It is not an external journey to be undertaken but one of acknowledging this fact. Once we acknowledge this we arrive where we started.
But we seem to hold the Soul hostage and captive. If we would only free it.
I guess I have all the time in the world to do things that Agathiyar and the Siddhas have prescribed. My daily walk includes the figure 8 carried in the book "Walk 8 Break Diseases" by S.Srinivasan. Many ailments including LDL cholesterol, diabetes, arthritis, headaches, and bronchitis, shall be checked or arrested and possibly cured writes the author who has been doing it for 10 years as of the date of publication of the book, February 2014. Obesity will be checked, the excretory system shall function well, the vertebral column will be toned up, the oxygen required will be obtained, eyesight will improve, and blood pressure will normalize. It helps settle the mind for meditation, and one shall have a good sleep. To derive full benefit the figure 8 has to conform to the following size and space, between 14 and 16 feet in length and 7 to 8 feet in breadth. He advocates it to those under the influence of the planet Saturn which runs its 7 1/2 years course for he says they tend to benefit much from this practice as the planet Saturn's number is 8.
During my walks, I see people from all walks of life and of all ages and races. Going by the communities I notice that the Chinese will take up anything under the skies to stay healthy and jump into it immediately. They are willing to take chances. They are willing to gamble. The Indians need a lot of talk and convincing to do. The Malays hesitate and often look up to their spiritual leaders for approval as in fatwas or religious edicts before engaging in anything. In November 2008, "the Islamic authorities issued a ruling, known as a fatwa, instructing the country's Muslims to avoid yoga because of its Hindu roots." Soon after the ban, Muslims were allowed to carry on doing yoga minus the chanting. https://www.reuters.com/article/lifestyle/malaysia-backs-down-from-yoga-ban-amid-backlash-idUSTRE4AP2CA/
Considering these factors it is no surprise that we see the Chinese community taking the lead in keeping fit. There is this Chinese uncle in his 80s who plays basketball solo. Then there are these aunts and uncles in their 80s too who are seen brisk walking. Next come the Malays who join in the walk. Finally, we only see a few Indians in these parks taking a walk to keep fit.
We at AVM had come up with some programs to get the devotees to keep fit hoping that they would continue doing it. Are they doing it?
The lorry attendant whom I used to see often was sitting on the bench in the park as usual but unusually absorbed in deep thought yesterday. He lamented to me that much was going on in his mind. I wondered what they were. I pointed out to him asking him if he had debts, if he had an illness, if he had a family and responsibilities? He replied in the negative to all those questions. So what was bothering him I asked. He said that he had no parents. This jolted my mind to the moment Lord Muruga wanting to play a game comes as a cowherd and reminds Agathiyar that he was an orphan. Both Lord Shiva and Parvathy come along as an elderly couple and tell him that just as he was looking for his parents they too were looking for their child. They drive in the point that Agathiyar in being fully engrossed in spreading the Tamil language had forgotten his parents. The couple reveal themselves and consoled him that he was not an orphan. The Siva family appear before him and pronounce that he was not an orphan but part of the family.
Gowri Arumugam under her label Raagawave penned a song set to music by Jey Raggaveindra that was jointly produced by AVM and AUM. One track among the seven touched on this.
I told the man to look back at the number of mothers and fathers that he has had in all his births, something that Pattinathar highlights in his songs. I told him to look at himself, cheer up for all the above reasons, and be grateful. Not many can afford to sit and gaze aimlessly into the skies. I told him to look around. People are all running around trying to make ends meet and feed the family amidst all the tensions and stress that they take on. Finally, I told him that I envy him for Agathiyar and Lord Murugan too have asked me to do nothing like him.
Losing one's parents is something difficult. So is it in losing a child. But Agathiyar tells us to welcome death. It is a process and a gateway to another journey. What remains in all these numerous births is the soul that takes on the experiences that come from learning.
My mother-in-law is finding it so difficult to accept her present state. She tells us that she cannot serve us all as she has in the past. We must understand that with age comes its limitations. We have to settle into it. If we start comparing to what we did in the past we are going to be frustrated angry and can only cry and weep.
Thus the reason the Siddhas begin to prepare us by asking us to let go of our hold slowly as we approach our graves so that the soul can depart easily in its last moments.
We think that we are here to acquire more. But the truth is that we are here to let go. We are not here to build an empire out of our desires but rather to exhaust our past desires and Vasanas. I guess Arunagiri who is rumored to be a womanizer had to work out his bodily urges and satisfy his desire for flesh. Similarly, the others he slept with too must have carried Vasanas that needed to see the light of the day. I guess this is where some bachelor gurus fall from disgrace. Here is when you have to tread the path carefully and steer clear of the opposite sex. Sex will cloud the mind. This is what is depicted as the enchantress Rambai, Urvasi, and Menaka from Indra's court coming to entice the Rishis and pull them into Maya, hence disrupting their lifelong efforts in attaining the state that they worked towards. This is what Mara did taking the form of beauties to seduce Buddha too. It is safe to appease one's wants with his wife or her husband. It is not wrong to discharge these urges with his or her life partner. When one has traveled deep into the jungle, sexual urges will run wild. Erections last long and you will enjoy sex just as much as you enjoy the Prana in the food and the Prana in the breath. All three shall reach a state of orgasm reaching deep into the very core of the body and its cells. Agathiyar has said that in cooking and serving food he feeds the "elementals" residing in the body of his devotees. I understand now why our ancestors and elders were so steeped in tradition back then inviting a visitor at the door, and serving them food. They had welcomed the deity too who followed these guests. Indeed Agathiyar has identified to us deities who follow devotees to our home AVM. In serving food to these visitors we serve the deities that live and move within them too. Agathiyar's song on the many ways to realize Lord Muruga "Shanmuga Nayagan Thondriduvaan" clearly explains it all. This beautiful composition from Agathiyar on his Guru Lord Murugan explains the many instances and forms where Lord Murugan appears. Agathiyar reveals how Lord Muruga comes to devotees. He lists the many forms that he takes. A verse from this song роЕро╡рой் рокроХ்родро░் роиுро┤ைрои்родிроЯுроо் ро╡ீроЯ்роЯிройிро▓ே reveals that he follows into the homes where his devotees step into. He accompanies his devotees wherever they go.
At times he goes ahead and clears the way and awaits our arrival as in the case of Jnana Jothiamma having overstayed in India due to her condition when her body was going through a tremendous internal transformation under the supervision of Agathiyar. As she did not seek medical attention at any clinic or hospital, as the Siddhas came personally knocking on her door to pass on medicines and herbs, how could she possibly justify to the Embassy why she had overstayed? But as Agathiyar promised the Embassy acted in her favor and she got an extension, without being deported or penalized.
Besides being in the places his devotees are, Agathiyar says he is in the intimate moments we spend with our spouse, роЗрой்рокрок் рокெро░ுроо்рокுройро▓் ро╡ீро┤்роЪ்роЪிропிро▓ே, роХாрогுроо் ропாро╡ுроо் роТрой்ро▒ெрой்ро▒ுрогро░் роХாроЯ்роЪிропிро▓ே.
He explains further the many instances and forms where Lord Murugan appears and is seen and felt. Among them,
he is seen through the eyes as a vision,
in the flower fields,
when the mind settles,
in the breeze that delivers Gnanam,
in the chant of his name,
in the untouched forest,
in the hill fortresses,
amidst the crowd of devotees and their dance,
in the places of worship,
in the silence where the Atma attains bliss,
in reaching out to the poor and in giving to them,
in forgetting one's body in devotion and bhakti,
in those who have known the truth,
in the gist of Vedanta,
at Tiruchendur where the waves break,
in Kundalini Yoga,
in the merger of Paramatma and Jeevatma,
in the service rendered by devotees,
in showering him with flowers,
in the waters that fall,
in seeing all as one,
in seeing nature,
in the stars that twinkle,
in seeing him on a peacock,
in forgetting the body and watching the Jeevatma,
in carrying out Sariyai,
in Poigai where the Ganges merge,
in letting go of opinions and ego,
in the rows of light,
when Gnanam dawns and
in Agathiyar's songs, and
he goes on.
God's presence is very much in nature, all around us, and in all our activities.
Pathinathar had to work out and exhaust his desires to immerse property and wealth. Ramalinga Adigal came clean and left clean. Saint Arunagiri never left his body behind. Saint Pattinathar too never left his body behind. Ramalinga Adigal who came some 200 years ago too did not leave his body behind. They transformed and transmuted their gross body into a subtle form and remain invisible to our eyes to this day. So did they observe Sariyai, Kriyai, Yogam, and Gnanam, the four phases each one of us has to go through? I guess they must have been through these phases in their earlier births. Now think how many births and lives I have to take further to reach their state. As it is, Agathiyar tells me he has known me for crores of years though I have no recollection. It is said that Buddha saw thousands of heads to his left after his Nirvana. Seeking to know its meaning he was told that those were his past births. Looking to his right he saw yet another thousand. Those were the births to come. It seems like a never-ending story. How do we then break this chain? I guess it's not possible and this is the reason the gods and saints reincarnate too. So should we drop the effort? Maybe we had tried too hard. Maybe we should just leave it to Divine Grace or his Arul. Maybe we should lose our identity. Then we shall be IT. We shall become THAT. We shall remain THAT. We shall recognize our SELF. We shall remain AS IS. We shall be what we were all were all this while. Maybe that is the reason Agathiyar and Lord Muruga want me to do nothing too. The breath takes me where I want to go when I sit doing nothing these days. I remember back then when I was doing Puja, Agathiyar used to say that my Puja takes him where he wants to go which I never understood then. Today we have come to immerse ourselves in the joy and bliss of his presence.
We always have a habit of seeking blessings from every holy man who comes by. If we procure their blessings, they unknowingly strengthen our egos and weaknesses. Stop seeking blessings if you have many negativities in you for these shall only strengthen your existing nature. No one can burn these with their look or stare. There is no easy way out. You have to work on your negativities first and transform them before seeking blessings from sadhus and holy men. Now I understand why Thavathiru Rengaraja Desigar of Ongarakudil kept silent when I repeatedly called out asking for his blessings. Finally, he turned to me and said that coming there itself was a blessing and shut me up. He made me feel unwanted. I went back disappointed. Agathiyar later told me that I did not know the man well, and to go back to him again. Similarly, he did not know me either. So imagine if I wanted to harm someone and stood before a sage or sadhu for his blessings and he did bless me. Imagine the consequences of his generosity. No wonder Tavayogi told me that a guru would truly test us to the limit or for some 12 years before parting us with his knowledge or with even a blessing for that matter. I never went back to Ongakarakudil. Indeed I went the first time on the compulsion of his devotees in Malaysia. Yogi Ramsuratkumar too refused to bless someone who arrived there after visiting Mata Amritanandamayi Devi Amma but for another reason. He told his aids later that he did not want to disturb the blessings he had received from her earlier. It is said that Saint Avvai too, to our surprise, has said that one should neither condemn anyone nor bless them.
Rather than seek the blessings of others all life long, it is time we worked on ourselves to reach the state of those whom we cherish, honor, and look up to as gurus. lf most gurus give us their blessings and send us off, Tavayogi had me drop my hold on all things and stripped me naked instead. Agathiyar on his part made me realize my mistakes and weaknesses and had me strengthen my virtues. The entire house was brought down and rebuilt. Only then did the Divine Grace come within. The greatest blessing is that from the Divine. This Grace or Arul does not come without effort. We have to work towards proving ourselves worthy to receive it first and only then does it shower on us. Once it showers, it then pours for days, months, years, and lifetimes. It carries us off in its strong currents.
Swami Muktananda sheds some light in his book "Kundalini - The Secret of Life" published by Siddha Yoga Publication, in 1994. He writes,
"The basis of all disease and pain is the impurities that block the flow of Prana in the Nadis. These blockages are caused by imbalances and disorders in the three bodily humors - wind, bile, and phlegm. She (Kundalini) penetrates all 720 million Nadis, consumes all the old decaying fluids, and then releases vital energy into them all. The Nadis become filled with Prana. It is only after the body has been purified that the Shakti can work with full force."
Swami Kripananda, author of the "Sacred Power (Kundalini)", and "The Guru's Sandals" writing the introduction for Swami Muktananda's "Kundalini - The Secret of Life", states "It is not enough for the guru to awaken Kundalini. The guru also controls and regulates the process helping to remove all the blocks and obstacles in the disciple's path until the disciple attains the ultimate realization of the self. Being one with the inner energy the guru can accomplish this on a subtle level from within."
He says bit by bit as it moves through the subtle system, blocks are removed, addictions fall away, and one's life is set in order. Ultimately the experience of the self becomes constant. Hence nothing happens overnight. Bit by bit, the Kundalini unfolds and travels within. Because he has merged his individual awareness into the divine, the guru can serve as a pure vessel through which its pure energy flows. It is this transmission of divine energy which awakens and guides the Kundalini.
When Agathiyar told me there was nothing else to do and that she shall do her work, Swami Muktananda too says the same in his book "Where Are You Going - A Guide to the Spiritual Journey", published by Syda Foundation, 1989, "Kundalini is an all-knowing intelligent force and she knows exactly how to work within the system." He adds "Bliss will throb in every pore of your body. Only the guru can know that delight and taste the elixir that arises in every pore of the body." I am having these experiences. Only he knows what I am going through.
When the Chakras of the sense organs are purified the physical senses become sharpened and refined. Swami Muktananda writes further,
"On her journey to the Sahasrara, Kundalini passes through all the sense organs, purifying them and investing them with new powers. As Kundalini rises to the ocular center, she purifies the eyes. As the Kundalini purifies the sense of touch, one begins to feel thrilled of love through every pore and hair of the body. One becomes immersed in the joy of touch. When Kundalini reaches the center of smell it purifies that, and one comes into direct contact with the essence of smell. When the Shakti moves to the auditory center, she purifies this too. When a shower of nectar is released and begins to fall dropping onto the root of the tongue, the taste buds become extremely refined. Even the simplest food is relished."
This knowledge (of the Kundalini) was so well hidden, in fact, that when Swami Muktananda received Kundalini awakening from his own master Bhagawan Nityananda and began experiencing its effects, he had no idea what was happening to him." So did I not know what was taking place within too, until Agathiyar came along to reveal and explain later. Agathiyar told me that the energies activated in 2010, having stagnated for a while at Manipuraka, and that were released after the 22nd, and 23rd August 2022 episodes, would do their work and that there was nothing that I needed to do further. Just as Tavayogi told me our efforts are only until we reach Svadhistana and the guru shall lead us on from there, all my efforts ended that day. Read about these occurrences at Siddha Heartbeat: A NEW JOURNEY (agathiyarvanam.blogspot.com)
As their grace deepened, a slight throb was felt at the spot on the head at exactly the anterior fontanel or the soft spot located in newborns. This throb nudges me to take notice of it and become aware. Agathiyar told me each shall realize his center роЪுро┤ிрооுройை (Suzhimunai). "Know the spot where energy and vibration or роЙрогро░்ро╡ு comes within, it to be your Suzhimunai," he says. One who arrives at his center becomes total adds Agathiyar. He calls this the state of рокро░ிрокூро░рогроо் (Paripuranam).
After having these experiences, Agathiyar asked that I write about them so that readers would know what to expect walking the path of internal transformation towards the goal of attaining Jothi. As both my gurus Supramania Swami and Tavayogi say whether we attain the state is immaterial for now. At least we are working towards it. We shall come back again if we fail in this life.
Swami Muktananda mentions in his book ‘Secret of the Siddhas’, Siddha Yoga Publication, 1980, that his master gave him one word that completely transformed him. Muktananda says,
"That word (Guru Om), which I receive after so many years, spread through my body from head to toe like wildfire carried by the wind. It produced in me both inner heat and the coolness of joy. Before meeting my guru I had practiced many different kinds of yoga, but it was I who had practiced them. However, that word activated a spontaneous yoga within me. I was filled with amazement. After the awakening of the Shakti, this process of yogic movements began to take place within my entire body. The pulsation of his ecstasy pervades my entire body like the movement of the wind. The Kriyas were his, the yoga was his, and meditation took place because of him. The final message that I received was from him. The power of his word permeates each of my blood cells; the fluids of my entire body are his. That is why I am joyful. Gurudev entered me and replaced all my bodily fluids with his. He evicted me and took up residence in me. He annihilated my ego. By making my individuality his, he became me. This is the guru’s compassion. Only when I lost myself in the ecstasy of Bhagawan Nithyananda did I realize who he was.
I have on numerous occasions lost myself having immersed in the bliss and ecstasy in the Divine presence when I visited temples and conducted puja in my home and that of others. I wonder if others understood, for seeing the videos of these moments most of them had a blank look on their faces. As Swami Muktananda says "Only the guru can know that delight and taste the elixir that arises in every pore of the body" and as Ramalinga Adigal says "Only the Lord knows what I am going through", indeed one has to experience and savor this ambrosia to know.
When I had my first taste of this ambrosia flowing within as I used to complete my solo puja in my home and stepped out, I would tell my wife if only I could transfer the feeling to her by touch... As this feeling expanded I wished to touch the lives of others too bringing them to the worship of the Siddhas. I guess that is when Agathiyar in 2013 brought many youths over to experience the join too. It is now their turn to share the bliss with others who come their way too. Thus Mahindren has willingly taken it up hosting the first puja gathering the kids together at his home which has now become AVM too.
It is a blessing to be in the shadows of a guru forever. But the reality is that the guru has to move on too and so does the disciple. One cannot forever be in the shadows of a genuine guru for he would have his disciple move out when he sees that the disciple has grown spiritually, more so if he is seen to be capable of sailing the ship now. That is what Guhai Namasivayar did, sending off his disciple Guru Namasivayar away amidst his protest not wanting to leave. Tavayogi too since the beginning gave me the space to grow, often surprising me and catching me off guard asking me to speak about the Siddhas. Coming under his shadows and growing up I soon watched and learned many things. While Agathiyar seemed to seduce me by offering me gifts, positions, and honor, which I respectfully turned down, I learned to drop every single thing that I wore on me, carried close to my heart, and cherished in my dreams listening to Tavayogi. That is how I was nurtured and groomed coming and living under the shadow of the guru since 2005.
Picking up his teachings together my family and I traveled on this path. He had guided us well for we have come to see the results.
With the coming of several youths sent over to my home after their respective Nadi readings, my home became known as Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM), taking on the name of the hamlet where Tavayogi came to settle after his travels and Sadhanas throughout the length and breadth of India. We carried on the teachings of Tavayogi, the rituals, and yoga practices.
Today I am told to step back and take a rest by Agathiyar and Lord Muruga. The baton has been handed over to Mahindren to steer AVM to even greater heights.
During my working days, we at the office traveled to Terengganu for an event. The secretariat had informed the hotel management ahead that I was a vegetarian. My first meal at the hotel was somewhat basic. I had a talk with the chef and gave him ideas on what he could prepare. The next few meals over the next few days were a delight to savor. On the day of departure, I figured that the hotel had given me a great sendoff by way of serving all the dishes I had since day one. I was so delighted and happy. That was many years ago. Yesterday after our puja at the new AVM venue with the kids performing the rituals, I had a shocking revelation, but funny in a way. What I thought was a grand finale for me where the hotel served all the meals that I suggested they could serve, seemed from the perspective of another quick-witted person to be the balanced meals over the five days I had stayed there. We all had a good laugh when I realized this possibility after so many years. But we all doubted they would do that. It is a matter of perspective.
Similarly, when I attended Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), a personal development program organized by the office, I started to think out of the box. Asking us to draw an elephant on A3 size paper, I began to give my finest as I was acknowledged by many and those at the office to be a fine artist. When we came up front to exhibit our work, I turned out to be the best. Then the instructor drew his elephant. He placed a dot on the white sheet of paper and told us that that was his elephant. We were all taken aback. How could that be an elephant? He went on to tell us that it was an elephant that was seen from space. It blew our minds. We all had a good laugh when we realized this possibility. It is a matter of perspective.
Then he pulled out his credit card and asked each of us to describe what we saw seated in our respective positions. One person saw the front side that carried the name of the bank that issued it, its logo, the card number, the chip, the expiry date, the cardholder's name, and the hologram. Another who saw the rear side pointed out the magnetic strip, signature box, and CVC code. The others saw only the edge of the card. Here again, is the play of perspective.
If we cannot see beyond the corner if we are on the road, someone in a light aircraft or helicopter sees the road, the bends, the cars, and the vast terrain. An astronaut sees the entire earth. So is it with the Siddhas and the Gods. They have a better view of the world and its goings-on because they see the bigger picture.
I understand now why Agathiyar keeps telling us that there is no right and no wrong. It all depends on where we stand and look. As our learning, understanding, and experiences defer too, we cannot possibly agree on a thing. Let each of us live our lives as we see best. This shall bring tolerance and peace among us. I too learned a lesson in guiding AVM all these years. Lord Muruga told me that I cannot expect everyone to be exactly like me. If Agathiyar had youths in their twenties and early thirties come over to watch me and my family carry out the Siddha puja after their respective Nadi readings, Mahindren who volunteered to steer the new AVM, for a start, has taken up working on the kids.
Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) moved into a new era today under Mahindren's guidance. As Agathiyar and Lord Murugan intended to revive it, Mahindren volunteered to turn his family home into AVM. Today he gathered his kids and those of his siblings and my daughter's kids and led them on Siddha Puja, briefing, and explaining the meaning behind this worship and the rituals in simple terms. Having covered Sariyai and Kriyai, practically showing them these two phases, he would introduce the third phase, Yoga in the next monthly gathering.
What is a sign of a good disciple? A good disciple understands and follows his or her master's teachings to its core. There are those who follow blindly as in the story of the disciples who would look for a cat to tie up to a post before carrying out the Yagam just because their master did, without knowing its reason. And there are those who tend to question every single thing said, at every juncture, wanting to know the reasons before even starting the venture. If the former surrenders to the guru blindly without understanding the guru, the latter might seem apprehensive and cautious and might seem not to have full faith in the master.
So when I was called to the worship of the Siddhas in the Nadi, I went looking for someone to guide me further or something to grab onto and pursue the journey. I was totally blind and had to grab the hand of someone who had passed through the terrain before. Finding none, I began to gather the facts and information, practices and methods from whatever books and literature I could lay my hands on at that time. I began my home puja to the Siddhas. Agathiyar then sends Tavayogi to our shores and we meet. A wonderful relationship between a guru and a student evolved. I was one who followed the words of the guru as coming to the path of the Siddhas, I was treading on unknown territory. He taught me by carrying out Yagam and puja. He taught me by showing me Yoga Asanas and Pranayama. He taught me to drop everything. In having me drop all that I had carried with me before meeting him, he filled me up anew with Siddha's teachings and topped it up with his experiences. He then stepped back and left me to gain my own experiences, to be proud of. After Tavayogi's demise, Agathiyar continues to guide us.
As I grew, my family who were with me on my journey, grew too. When I asked my wife to say something about the path and share her experiences, views, opinions, and understanding, she amazed me. I could see that she had understood the teachings of Tavayogi pretty well. She understood why Tavayogi and Agathiyar carried out certain measures as we traveled along. I am glad that the family is traveling together on the path of the Siddhas.
Each day is a learning. If I thought that I was shown men in their myriad colors and nature when I packed food for two gentlemen whom I used to meet when I went for my walk, as posted in an earlier post, today I came to know how wrong I was to assume things. If the assistant to the lorry driver told me that he had taken food and asked that I give it to someone else, the sweeper who took the food I gave although he already had some packed food with him made me think how selfish could he be to want more. Today when I spoke to the assistant to the driver, he told me that they both knew each other and the sweeper would share his access food with him. I learned a lesson today: not to assume or judge another's actions. I guess like the story of the old lady who earned the wrath of Lord Siva for assuming that the king killed the villagers by feeding them poisoned food, not knowing the truth that a snake had spit its venom as it was in the claws of an eagle flying over the festival grounds, Lord Siva has written the account on me.
Man turns ugly or shows his ugly side once the other party is on the other side of the fence as in carrying a faith, or belief, following certain practices, adopting an alien culture, or tradition, following a particular guru and Gods, or as in the choice of food, dressing, and many more. If one follows him in all aspects he is overjoyed and takes him as his buddy, otherwise he or she is alienated. We get the stare if we are different. I guess I too had got mad that many did not follow the dictates of Agathiyar as I did and seen its benefits, for Lord Murugan came to tell me to cool off and that he would take care of them, reminding me not to get angry for I shall fall from the current state of being, and all their efforts to this day shall go to waste, he added.
I feel pity for those who get alienated just because their preference for food varies from us. I would like to ask those fanatics who uphold vegetarianism and publicly decry meat eating "Is there something like vegetarian blood?" If in the event they need a blood transfusion, can they request vegetarian blood from the blood bank or are they going to wait for a vegetarian to come up and volunteer to give them blood? The milk that we drink and that is used to do Abhiseka for the deities is produced in the body and from the blood of the cow. When we suckled our mother's breast was she a vegetarian? Or was the milk vegetarian? The water that we drink and pour over the deities has its source in the rivers that have fish and other organisms living in them. The air that we breathe in carries the expelled air from non-vegetarians and animals too. The plants, trees, and tubers derive the minerals from the soil that has decayed corpses of animals and insects. It is these plants and trees that give us the vegetables and fruits. It is these tubers that we eat. The body itself is a large mass of meat. When all the five elements that contribute to nature and everything resulting in nature are adulterated, so tell me what is truly vegetarian? Just as Agathiyar showed us to respect every deity, be it the greater deities or the lesser deities so too should we respect all and not divide people according to the menu they eat. Let them eat in peace. They will come around to understand the true need, reason, and purpose of asking to drop meat.
For one who wants to transform his gross body into that of light, he has to stop taking meat for a start. Then he has to work on his body to cleanse its internals and expel the "impurities" as a result of years of meat consumption. Soon he has to work on his entire body which is a huge chunk of meat, transforming it into "a pure light body". This is as much as I understand. I cannot explain further for I haven't stepped into these phases as yet. But we can always look up to Ramalinga Adigal's experience for he had been there and back.
We come to the Siddhas with the false notion that all our worries, hardships, sufferings, misfortunes, etc will disappear overnight. The Siddha only can tell us why it's happening and possibly suggest remedies. They cannot give life nor take it away, says Agathiyar. That is the jurisdiction of Lord Siva. But the Siddhas can appeal to Lord Siva and Brahma on our behalf.
I believe Agathiyar extends an invitation to those who have traveled far with him in previous births. That is the reason he begins to push us to do things for our soul empowerment. An empowered soul knows what it has to do rather than aimlessly live life. The Siddha upon seeing one as having the potential to be molded into one of their kind, enters his life, then helps transform him and brings him before God. Bringing us from Sariyai that was taught by our parents, to perform Kriyai which is given by the gurus in physical form, who follow up with dispensing Yoga to us, the Siddhas then come down to us to bring about an internal transformation. It is now a play of energies, a light show and they direct it. With their grace, the final phase of the journey starts. This is the stage of the merger into Oli Degam or Light. This is the "mystic union which is the goal of bridal mysticism" says G.Vanmikanathan in describing Ramalinga Adigal's final moment of union with the Lord in his book "Pathway to God Trod by Saint Ramalingar", Bharatiya Vidya Bhavan, Bombay.
"In a span of about fifteen years, what was unrelieved misery had become metamorphosed into joy. This is not the effect of the passage of time which dulls the edge of misery, but a genuine change in the outlook on what seemed like misery. This is the result of the affinity - a spiritual rapport between Raamalinga Swaamikal and the Godhead, which has grown stronger and stronger with the years, a rapport that has grown into the relationship of bride and bridegroom."
Agathiyar too each time he came to explain after I had gone through pain and misery, told me that this was a joy. He too asked that I change my "outlook on what seems like misery". Jnana Jothiamma too used to share the moments of misery and pain she had to withstand and go through for the internal transformation to take place. But Agathiyar tells me that her body could no longer take this intense pressure and she was relieved of the suffering. I too was told to expect death and be prepared for it. Agathiyar spoke of death in the event it happens. Death is another doorway to another journey says Agathiyar.
"Do not be afraid of death. It is but another door to another journey. One who invites death is a Siddha. There is much I need to carry out through you. Enough of my praise. Write about your bodily experiences. Let your writings be about the changes taking place in your body. Let your readers know the changes that take place in the body if they come to worship the light and seek to merge with it. My wisdom shall be your experience. Experience first and I shall clarify the experiences later. Experience is knowledge to you. Nothing is beyond experience."
After years of intense suffering, the grace of the divine is showered on us. "God with name and form will disappear and where ultimately the worshiper and the worshiped, the seeker and the sought, the soul and the Godhead, will merge into each other", writes G.Vanmikanathan. The divine grace comes as "the crowning glory of the long years of Tavam" or austerities he writes. "The Son of Man has become the Son of God."
One might have to stay longer to "discharge his preordained mission on earth" as did Ramalinga Adigal "commence his ministry on earth, establish the Pure Universal True Path to God, a path, a religion, based on compassion towards all creatures on earth, a religion based on intense and one-pointed love of God, a religion freed from the stifling influences of caste, country, race, language, conflicting creeds, petty cruel gods and inhuman sacrifices, freed from the dialectics of learned scriptures."