The grace of the guru has to be told. The grace of the guru has to be spoken. The grace of the guru has to be shared. The first mention of gurus was in reading Paramahansa Yogananda's "An Autobiography of a Yogi," where he spells out the many gurus he came across. This book was a gift from an officer in the unit where I came to be posted in 1994. Segaran had decided to take up monkhood at the Ranchi Ashram of Yogananda in India. Besides this book, he gave me a painting of Lord Shiva and some advice not to reject any work that comes my way, even if it was not my job. The book took me by storm, as before this I had only known the Gods, Goddesses, and deities in the temples and met some visiting Swamiji's who were invited to give talks at these temples.
When in the eighties as a bachelor I used to pray at my bachelor home and visit the numerous temples around my dwelling, and picked up Yoga from reading books, and satisfied my hunger to know why my community were carrying out certain traditions, customs and practices, and after questioning and doubting God after witnessing the sufferings my relatives and friends went through, all puja and temple visits, Yoga practices, these readings, and questions were put on hold for some 13 years after Lord Shiva came in a dream and asked to keep my questions to a later date. I was an empty vessel now ready to be filled in with the divine nectar of Agathiyar, as I was to find out soon. When Dr. Krishnan, an astrologer, Siddha physician, and friend, spelled out in 1996 that the possibility his predictions did not go well with me was due to curses from previous lives, and told me that only the Siddhas would know these, Agathiyar, in revealing the reasons I took birth, confirmed these curses in my first Nadi in 2002. In speaking about my Karma, he made me realize the reasons for others' sufferings, too. Besides this, Agathiyar spelled out that though I had worked hard on visiting Sariyai, holding up Kriyai, and practicing Yoga, obstacles stood in the way of all my Sadhana and prevented me from reaping the benefits of these practices. He had me go on pilgrimages and carry out remedies in the form of puja at certain designated temples.
In 2001, my nephew surprised me with a message that I would meet my guru. To facilitate this event to take place, I was asked to recite the Vasudeva mantra that came through him, too, in a state of a Yogic trance. Later, I came to read that this mantra breaks through the knots within, hence clearing the path further of all blockages. Though he asked that I not question the source, he revealed it sometime later, telling me that it was from Agathiyar, who had my nephew's Paramaguru Gopal Pillai come through a buddy of his. Agathiyar had me clear the path of obstacles that stood in my way of meeting my guru. True to what was told, I read the Nadi for the very first time the following year, where Agathiyar mentioned himself as Moola Guru. Agathiyar mentioned again that I shall unexpectedly meet my guru. He set me off on a pilgrimage to India the following year, and upon completing all the Parikaram or remedies that he had listed out that I do, bringing me to stand at the door of an astrologer who turned out to be my very first guru, Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai. This meeting was orchestrated by the divine, having my wife just as I was to leave the home with my baggage to the waiting cab that was to take me to the airport, ask me to have our second daughter's horoscope charted in India while I was there.
Supramania Swami shared with me about his five gurus, namely his own father, Jayaraman Pillai; Sathanandha Swami; Kollimalai Swami; Poondi Mahan (Atru Swami), and finally Yogi Ramsuratkumar (Visiri Swami) of Thiruvannamalai. On my second visit to India in 2005, he brought Yogi Ramsuratkumar from his Samadhi to sit among both of us and chant the Yogi's name with us. When I told him that I submitted to assist him to build a temple for Lord Muruga for a selfish reason and went on to share the story I had read about how Agathiyar had provided accomodation and food for Lord Murugan who was roaming as Supramaniar back then and upon becoming Jothi or Light the Lord promised to meet up with Agathiyar in another birth and bring him to that state too, Supramania Swami within any hesitation gifted me all the merits of his forty years of Tavam or austerities. This skyrocketed my journey to greater heights. The temple itself was grounded at the stage of groundworks when a stranger came up to him and questioned Swami why he was going back to Bakthi when he was already a Gnani.
Agathiyar sent Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar ashram to our shores, where I met him at a local Peedham, which he came to officiate in 2005. A leaflet that I was given by the Nadi reader during my Nadi reading in 2002 led me to stand at the door of this Peedham, where a bond between a disciple and guru began to flourish in the years to come. Initiating my wife and me into the mantra of Agathiyar together with six others that day, he invited me to his ashram. Days later, Agathiyar, through another Nadi reading after the last one in 2002, has him initiate me again in private. Following behind him upon his departure, he took me on a journey that was out of the books. Giving me real-time experiences and practical lessons after I arrived at his ashram, as I tried to keep pace with him as he took me into the caves and jungles, he initiated me for the third time and sent me off to return home to continue the journey on my own.
After meeting Tavayogi and inviting him to my home for the very first time, I was elated and extremely happy, and I mentioned it to him. He shot me down, telling me that I was living in Maya and that he was a nobody, and asked me to hold on to Agathiyar instead. But over the years, I began to realize that they were one in all manner of speech, walk, practice, teachings, etc. He did me a great favor that day by doing so; otherwise, I would be worshipping his photo. He showed me to Agathiyar instead.
As all my Karma and obstacles began to clear, traveling holding the hands of my Gurus, I made quick progress to the surprise of Tavayogi himself, who mentioned with awe how I had come to their fold easily compared with him and others. In having been gifted certain Yogic Asanas and Pranayama techniques which Agathiyar says are a treasure through having Tavayogi show me and several others, in 2007, creative energies that lay dormant at the Muladhara after performing their work in bringing together the embryo, fetus, and child, and man in me and that I am today, began to arise again without my knowledge and began to pool at Svadishtana. Pain, discomfort, and misery came with the awakening of these dormant energies. But he had friends and Siddhas and Gods come to my aid in bringing relief. Agathiyar again came to break the bund in 2022, and allow these energies to flow unhindered to the Sahasrara within days, bringing on immense bliss that is felt even as I write these words. All my individual efforts ended thus on that day, as Agathiyar said that the energy would do its work. Read further at Siddha Heartbeat: THE WORK OF A SIDDHA NEVER ENDS
Holding on to Agathiyar as Tavayogi had shown me, now Agathiyar surprised me, telling me to let go of him too, for how else could we be one, he asked. He brought me from Dvaita to Advaita. On another day, as I thanked him profusely for all that he had done for me again, he asked who I was thanking and for what, mentioning that we were one. He reveals the next phase, that of experiencing, feeling, and tasting Sivam and ultimately knowing the Atma. Ramalinga Adigal's discourse brings us there.
Yesterday, Agathiyar further established and endorsed the realization that he was my shadow, father and mother, companion and friend, guardian angel and guru, when I took a look at a plate that I had with me for some time now and had jokingly told many to eat from it to gain instant Gnanam from Bhogar. This plate had a painting of Lao Tzu (Bhogar) and a student on it. Yesterday, as I tidied up my home and kitchen, I came across this plate that was shelved away. Upon close examination, this time around, I was jolted by the truth that was depicted through this painting. It had the student bend over under the weight of his baggage of Karma. He turns to look at why his weight had lightened then. Lao Tzu is seen standing behind him, holding on to his load too, hence relieving him partly of his Karma. This Karma and the experiences and lessons that came with it are turned into the glowing mystical fruit Gnanam now. This is the grace of the Guru.
