Tavayogi once told me to speak about the Siddhas in the midst of others during the opening of a new Peedham in a house in Banting during one of his earlier visits to Malaysia. I was figuring out what to say for I knew so little as I was new to the path. Upon his insistence, I hesitatingly began to speak a few words about him and set off with chanting of the Maha Mantra Arutperunjothi where all those gathered followed suit. I escaped the trial and test cunningly.
I remember the moment when I spoke about religion to a new colleague of mine at the office back then during my bachelor days when I read a lot. He seemed intent on listening and I continued on. Eventually, he yawned and bid goodbye. Tavayogi used to tell me to preach where what we have to say is received well. As I had experienced it, I was always careful to speak. But I guess I slipped when just like Tavayogi, Agathiyar some time back told me to speak to a gathering of devotees after the puja. Again I started with some hesitation. I called upon those gathered to share their experiences with Agathiyar. When I ended my talk touching on the subject of vegetarianism, Agathiyar who always apprehended me if I stepped out of line, came later and told me that it was not an appropriate venue to speak on it as those gathered were not ready to change their eating habits and switch their diet.
When I was heading the Parent-Teachers Association at my daughter's school back then when she was studying there, I would be given a script to read and address the students, teachers, and parents whenever there were events. Following the advice of my gurus that one before taking the stand or stage must study the audience and the target group and his speech should reach the target group, I would study the audience first. Whenever they seemed inattentive or distracted, I would cut short my speech and give way for the next event on the agenda.
Many love to talk. They can go on for hours without ever asking if the message got across. They keep rattling even if it is pretty obvious that the audience was disinterested, distracted, or lost their attention span. I love the scene from the movie "Sakuni" where when a guru sitting under a tree preaches and people keep talking among themselves, two youths who observe this from afar walk up to him and sell him an innovative way to "Package and Market" his "product". People start to turn towards him seeking his attention when he begins to keep quiet. The youths had taught him to shut up and in doing so gain their attention. So it goes that Lord Dhakshanamurthy used to preach to his students under a tree too. They would ask him questions and he would answer them. But it simply did not register in them for they carried on asking more questions and it kept going on. Finally, he kept his silence, and the knowledge dawned from within them.
When Dr.Krishnan who knew my passion for Agathiyar insisted that I meet the head of an establishment in the name of Agathiyar from a neighboring state who had pitched himself in the office space of the doctor, I hesitatingly pulled myself over just to oblige my good friend, astrologer, and Siddha Practitioner. The head asked me what I was doing and I replied that I had a statue of Agathiyar and was worshipping him at home. He then threw at me the songs of Sivavakiyar stating his disapproval of idol worship. I replied that I needed it because I was a beginner and above and beyond that it was Agathiyar who directed me to do so. But my reasoning fell on deaf ears and he went on rattling. As I figured it was useless knocking sense into him, I shut up and closed my eyes. That is when the Siddhas stepped in, something I did not anticipate nor knew then. A loud laughter echoed, that shut him up. Upon opening my eyes he was not to be seen again. I left the premises as I saw that the doctor was still engaged with his clients unaware of what had transpired in the waiting room. They saved me yet again.
When I began to edit videos and upload them to YouTube, and carried news on Tavayogi's Kallar Ashram on several websites in the beginning years, coming across an ugly comment about a photo of my first guru Supramania Swami that a friend and devotee had posted on his Facebook page, I deactivated all these accounts. When I told Tavayogi about my actions, he said to me, "Why son, let it be. Many shall come (to the path) watching and reading what you upload and post." I began to upload the videos again and create the websites from scratch, again.
Agathiyar had told me when he broke the group in 2019 having us go our way after giving each the tools and showing the method and the way, that henceforth it would be a solo journey as the path had narrowed and not to wait for others to catch up and time was running out for me and I shall miss the train. Agathiyar who tasked me to write this blog, asked that I share the transformation and its related experiences taking place within me in 2022 with readers. Most recently Lord Muruga came to remind me and reinforce this, asking me to do nothing and that he shall take care of his subjects, lifting the blind notion that I had of having a responsibility towards bringing others to the fold too. Knowing my anger, I guess Agathiyar who initially wanted me to take up the role of a teacher has shelved it for something that does not need me to interact with the public. I am grateful for his kind consideration. Then when we see all the chaos going on around us, we are reminded that what we say or write can get us into trouble with others or the authorities. I pray that I have not stepped on other's feet nor crossed the limits. If I have please forgive me.