I guess I have filled the shortcomings that Tavayogi faced in not being able to speak the English language fluently. He once told me that if only he could, he could have reached the farthest reaches of the world with the Siddhas message. But we are grateful to Agathiyar for stalling his intent to go into Samadhi and sending him over to our shores, for otherwise I cannot imagine how my life would have turned out to be.
I had questioned in a previous post after a devotee shared a video that reminded me of the mantras (song) that Tavayogi and later Mataji recited when conducting the Yagam on their ashram grounds.
Days ago, the question of why Gods and Siddhas, and later people too, went around hurling curses cropped up. Tavayogi told me he was cursed to lose his eyesight after, as a curious kid, he tested a mantra given by Agathiyar, though he was warned against doing so, in his last birth some thousands of years ago. That curse continued into this life, where he lost his eyesight for close to a year. Another seeker who knocked on the door of my home was told the same: that his disobedience in testing a given mantra in a past birth resulted in his untold misery and suffering in this birth. I, too, am said to have earned the wrath of the Namboothiris after being born into this clan and challenging their time-old practice in a past birth.
I then came to understand that Agathiyar brought relief to his ancestors by lifting their previous curses.
It is said that Agathiyar had to come around to relieve his ancestors who were cursed to hang upside down from a tree branch.
Asking this of Mataji, who is currently in Malaysia, when I met her again yesterday, she enlightened me, making me shed my previous understanding and accusations against the Siddhas. Contrary to what I understood as the Siddhas cursing us, these songs were addressed to the Siddhas to seek their help in ridding us of all the curses we might have had thrown at us, knowingly and unknowingly, throughout the many births we took in the past and in numerous possible ways and manners. And what better means than to light the sacrificial fire that consumes all this Karma and curses of us, and the misery and sufferings, illness and diseases too.
If Tavayogi took the initiative and moved to conduct the Yagam at his ashram grounds beginning in 2005, following the disaster that the tsunami brought on a year earlier, in his absence, Mataji has continued it till this day. I have compiled highlights of this ceremony at Kallar ashram grounds over the years.
Tavayogi had initiated me to carry out the Yagam on a smaller scale, called a Homam, in my home too, and Agathiyar came to tell me that I was doing it for the good of all of creation. I feel blessed. I was given the privilege to sing with Tavayogi, Mataji and the rest of the devotees during the 2016 celebrations. I am blessed. Agathiyar has asked that I fetch Mataji to my home tomorrow. Again, I am blessed.