Friday 30 June 2023

SIDDHA HEARTBEAT

Just as Stan Lee of Marvel comics says, "I don't want to sound like I'm the most moral guy in the world, but I always felt that there were some issues that ought to be addressed", hence the reason for writing the past few posts. I am devastated at seeing so many turn up at my door or whom I meet with issues that crop up with their spiritual practices. People in their eagerness to walk the spiritual path end up harming themselves without a genuine and true master or without proper supervision and monitoring by the gurus. As I sympathize with them, I cannot but regard myself lucky to have met both Supramania Swami and Tavayogi and of course Agathiyar without going in circles. I was led straight to Agathiyar and his Nadi through which I was given remedies to carry out to settle my past scores or karma, and pointed to the worship of the Siddhas, learned about my gurus, and learned rituals and practices, and learned the reasons for things to happen and take shape, and given remedies in the form of Siddha medicines, tutored and guided further besides the few rare moments of tutelage from my masters. 

There were many a times I felt sorry for Agathiyar too for he is trying so hard to save us and bring us back on track. How do we then please him or rather return the gratitude? I guess by listening to him. I for one listen and execute his commands and wishes though there were a few instances when I spoke my mind and reasoned with him, and he dropped them. He did not pursue on those matters. 

How I wish others can be guided by the Siddhas as we have been. What then is the stumbling block for others not to reach out to the Siddhas? How can I help others reach out to the Siddhas too? I guess one of the ways is through this blog hence the reason Agathiyar wants me to continue to write. He wants me to share my experiences and learning with readers. He gives me the subject and the words too. I just key them in. I guess he is speaking his mind through these pages. 

GOING THROUGH THE PHASES

Just as in assembling the puzzle pieces, we are amazed to see the puzzle take shape, we are amazed at the delivery system of the Siddhas as promised. Though not comparable with the many courier services that compete to deliver fast, their delivery system takes time and patience on our part. We have come to understand that each practice or directive of theirs is customized, studying one's health and past karma, and studying whether it was feasible to alter his or her fate and destine a new life in the company of the Siddhas.

The Siddha comes to claim us from our parents or life partner and brings us to walk the phase of Sariyai, looking after the ashram if there is one, or the home, keeping it tidy, and arranging for its rituals and puja. He then gets us to sit with him in conducting rituals and other Kriyas. He then introduces us to Yogam. He invites us to sit with him in contemplation. The Siddha initiates the dormant energies within in very subtle ways that do not jolt us or disrupt our daily affairs of the world and family if we are with the latter. He would monitor these energies and our progress daily. He would tell us when to begin and when to stop the rituals, puja, and yogic practices. The student will always be under the watchful eyes of the master who monitors him. From seeing him in temples, ashrams, and at our home altars, in the paintings and statues and the Yagam and Homam, and seeing him in others, man and animals, we are brought to see him in nature and the Prapanjam. We are shown to our own souls or Atma that guide us further in discovering Gnanam for ourselves. 

Agathiyar who came in the Nadi as words, and came as a statue, came as a guru. Just like Tavayogi handed us to Agathiyar, Agathiyar in parting his knowledge and practice, eventually handed us over to Prapanjam to take care of all our needs. Similarly, yesterday when I asked Ramalinga Adigal to bring us ashore he replied that Prapanjam shall care for us. 

If in the past the student is shut out from the outside world and begins to focus on the practice given within the ashram walls, is tutored and is himself transformed to the state of a guru and only then sent off to preach and share what was learned, having himself experienced the joy and bliss that comes with these practices and reached the state of enlightenment, in current times as information is accessible on the touch of a button or key, we tend to fill us up with all sorts of spiritual practices and knowledge that tend to create a conflict of energy paths in the former and contradict each other in the latter, and finally having us become confused or worse still turn cuckoo. 

A true guru would warn his student and teach him to ward off the dangers that lurk even in spiritual practices. He would have us wait and test us for some 12 years before imparting the final knowledge. If one has left earlier on his own accord or boasts a list of names of gurus just be cautious and careful. He might not be a full-fledged guru and might ruin your life. You have the right to test the guru just as he shall test you. Remember that we grow together both guru and disciple and are not at the mercy of either. Have a safe journey.

ON BECOMING A GNANI

Many have set out to learn a trick or two and perform them in public these days. If it was a show where it is purely entertainment it is acceptable. But when they begin to initiate, pass on energies, and teaching practices to the masses, that is what is going to endanger their lives. Just as Julius Caesar said that he came, he saw and he conquered, they come, initiate and leave. A 70-year-old lady desiring a good death and union with Siva was brought to an initiation session by her son who fell for the marketing strategies. Her son's idea of having her get an initiation was that she should attain Gnanam. One man cannot make another a Gnani says Agathiyar. It is one's own personal journey and depends on his own efforts. Gnanam is not gifted but has to be earned. We have to prove that we are worthy of it. Hence even the divine has its reservation when it comes to making Gnani of us. A Gnani is a rare commodity. It is a rare gem. Agathiyar reveals the dangers we face when these energies are raised late in life. I pray that both the guru and student are in touch after that for the guru has a responsibility towards each initiate of his. 

Even as I wished that I could share what I felt in those elated moments when I was in communion with these energies, I did not know the means. But the Siddhas came to fulfill this by having us join hands. Even then I wonder how many could engage and feel this energy traverse through them. But this transfer of energies is by the Siddhas, hence we know that it is monitored and would not harm the recipients. I knew that they were in safe hands. For instance, having learn yoga from books I was officially introduced to it by Tavayogi in 2007. Keeping at it, this set of practice had worked its wonders subtly in me without me realizing it, feeling it, or seeing these changes. It was later that year that Agathiyar told me that the serpent sleeping within had awakened, not abruptly but in a gentle manner, and that they were pleased. But as the energy did its work, clearing the house of filth accumulated over the years of living, I went into a state of pain and discomfort later in 2010. Even then I did not know it was a result of the movements of these energies until they revealed it. But the Siddhas kept monitoring me, revealing what was taking place in me and asking me to take certain herbs and do certain practices or rather halt them. They came in many ways to bring relief from the excruciating pain that I was enduring. But this is all part of the process. It would be easier on us if we have good health and adopted a sattvic menu. It would be easier on us if we were young. Then in asking us to go within Agathiyar asked me to revisit the yogic practice that Tavayogi taught, adapting it to the need of the moment. I could choose and pick the postures and techniques I wanted to do so that they would not hurt my back. Then in 2022, when these energies began to pond Agathiyar came to release the dam that resulted in certain abnormal experiences. But again Agathiyar was by our side monitoring and watching over us. As I began to see these changes in me too, I asked if there were any practices that I had to follow to which he replied, "No. It (the energy) shall do its work." Recently when he asked that I continue Pranayama I asked him if it would not hurt my back again. He replied, "Do it. I am with you." That is the compassion and love of a guru towards his disciple. Know that all these changes and developments took place after I started worshipping the Siddhas beginning in December of 2002 and these changes are still going on. It was all possible only after we had fallen in love with the divine. This love affair of some 21 years has blossomed from within as Ramalinga Adigal sings. It took that long to metamorphose. It was not a one-night stand where the guru dishes goodies and leaves never to be seen again. 


தோலெலாங் குழைந்திடச் சூழ்நரம் பனைத்தும்
மேலெலாங் கட்டவை விட்டுவிட் டியங்கிட
என்பெலா நெக்குநெக் கியலிடை நெகிழ்ந்திட
மென்புடைத் தசையெலா மெய்யுறத் தளர்ந்திட
இரத்த மனைத்துமுள் ளிறுகிடச் சுக்கிலம்
உரத்திடை பந்தித் தொருதிர ளாயிட

ஒண்ணுதல் வியர்த்திட வொளிமுக மலர்ந்திட

உண்ணகை தோற்றிட வுரோமம் பொடித்திடக்
கண்ணனீர் பெருகிக் கால்வழிந் தோடிட
வாய்துடித் தலறிட வளர்செவித் துணைகளிற்
கூயிசைப் பொறியெலாங் கும்மெனக் கொட்டிட
மெய்யெலாங் குளிர்ந்திட மென்மார் பசைந்திடக்
கையெலாங் குவிந்திடக் காலெலாஞ் சுலவிட

This love affair with the divine comes out into the open and is no more a secret as one shows these signs. If the above were initial and visible signs of changes in us, the following are subtle changes that take place in the innermost core of us, the Soul.

மடலெலா மூளை மலர்ந்திட வமுதம்
உடலெலா மூற்றெடுத் தோடி நிரம்பிட

தண்ணிய வுயிர்ப்பினிற் சாந்தந் ததும்பிட

மனங்கனிந் துருகிட மதிநிறைந் தொளிர்ந்திட
இனம்பெறு சித்த மியைந்து களித்திட
அகங்கார மாங்காங் கதிகரிப் பமைந்திடச்

சகங்காண வுள்ளந் தழைத்து மலர்ந்திட
அறிவுரு வனைத்து மானந்த மாயிடப்
பொறியுறு மான்மதற் போதமும் போயிடத்
தத்துவ மனைத்துந் தாமொருங் கொழிந்திடச்
சத்துவ மொன்றே தனித்துநின் றோங்கிட
உலகெலாம் விடய முளவெலா மறைந்திட
அலகிலா வருளி னாசைமேற் பொங்கிட
என்னுளத் தெழுந்துயி ரெல்லா மலர்ந்திட
என்னுளத் தோங்கிய என்றனி யன்பே

From Swami Saravanananda's explanation of Ramalinga Adigal’s “Arutperunjhoti Agaval” published by Ramalinga Mission, Madras, we can grasp the nature of the said transformation that took place in Ramalinga Adigal. 

"The skin has become supple; nerves function intermittently; bones have become soft and the tendons have lost their grip over the muscles; blood has congealed and semen has condensed into a solid ball;"

"The face glows and breath becomes peaceful; hairs rise on end and tears well up; mouth utters the name of the lord and the sound of OM pours into the ears; body becomes cooled and hands rise up in salutations;"

Those are external changes that are visible to the eye and others that the laboratory test might reveal. The following are deemed subtle changes that only the practitioner experiences. 

"Petals of the brain blossom and elixir fill up the body system; the mind ripens and melts and wisdom fills up the mental frame; the ever-pervading feeling has come to stay; egoism vanishes and the soul attains bliss; impurities get destroyed and purity alone remains; illusory tendency vanishes and a longing for god’s grace swells up…"

"Thus the process of transmutation being completed and perfected, the aspirant becomes the possessor of a golden body. This body with shrunken skin has become ever-youthful", an affirmation made by Ramalingam himself. It has shaken off sleep, hunger, thirst, and diseases from the system. It has been filled with divine light; it has developed immunity from all kinds of destructive forces."

From http://www.ramalinga.com, we read the same.

"Describing in an exquisite way the phases of the transformation of his body, Ramalinga says that the dermis and epidermis have become extremely soft; all the nerves, muscles, and tendons have slackened little by little; the bones, membranes, and cartilages have become very flexible; the blood has coagulated; the semen has concentrated being solidified;"

"The face glistens; the respiration is smooth and refreshing; from the tear glands abundant tears sprout; the mouth is half-opened tremulous and the ears are filled with sweet melodies. The entire body is refreshed and all its visible parts flourish in ecstasy. The heart swells palpitating Love. The ego vanishes, as the emotional and mental defects."

The subtle changes follow,

"The brain and all its parts have been opened like a bud. All over the body, an Elixir flows; A tender, loving, and compassionate quietude dominates the entire organism. The ardent desire to receive divine Grace overflows. The Supreme Love fills the body, which is the temple of the divine Life."

Swami Saravanananda writes further about these astounding bodily changes too.

"With the descent of sufficient Divine Light, the psychic head begins to emerge. According to Vallalar, this psychic head (a crown or diadem of light) is made up of a special and highly refined type of brain called Omkar brain. As soon as it emerges, it draws more cosmic light; the more the light the greater the growth of the psychic head. With the advent of the psychic head, more and more changes take place in the already purified body. The cells and thence the whole body begins to transcend the limits imposed on them by impure Maya (the grosser principle of nature) and try to break one more of its veils. The cells undergo alternate condensation and expansion for an unspecified period and the body slowly emerges out of its bondage and begins to grow. This expanding and ever-prospering body is called the subtle body or the body of the Omkar or Pranava body."

"With this perfection comes perfect knowledge. He (Vallalar) also seemed to have been bestowed with the third eye, after his body had attained perfection. This third eye enabled him to gain knowledge of the whole universe and all the individual beings contained in it. He asserts that his knowledge penetrated and pervaded layer upon layer of the varied types of universes. With the functioning of the third eye, the transformation of the Pranava body is completed and the next and final stage of transformation into the Gnostic body (Gnana deham) starts. As explained by Vallalar, the person whose third eye is active is verily God Himself as he can perform the fivefold primordial functions."

As for me I always look within to find out what is the lesson for me in all such encounters for instance as mentioned in the opening paragraph. I realize that Agathiyar was showing me the greatness of Tavayogi who never initiated us directly into Kundalini, and who never even healed us with his touch and look. He would scorn those who came seeking the former and detest when asked to carry out the latter. He told us to wait 12 years. He always showed us to Agathiyar. Like Bhogar he only knew Agathiyar. He did not project himself as Agathiyar. 

Another lesson I learned is that like how Goddess Ma Kali told Swami Vivekananda that all was her work when he was angry watching the destruction of temples taking place, I guess the divine is educating us the same to watch and not interfere. Those who fall for frauds and end in an unholy alliance are fated I guess and have to go through the turmoil and danger. Though it might sound selfish those who have been shown the path I guess need only to focus on their agenda for the time being and not get distracted till they reach Siddhahood. Only then they can come back to assist these drowning souls as they are now authoritative figures and are themselves Siddhas. As G.Vanmikanathan wrote in his book "Pathway to God Trod by Saint Ramalingar", Bharatiya Vidya Bhavan, Bombay,

"The Son of Man has become the Son of God, and he who was unknown and who did not want to be known was dragged much against his will to discharge his preordained mission on earth, to commence his ministry on earth, in order to establish the Pure Universal True Path to God, a path, a religion, based on compassion towards all creatures on earth, a religion based on intense and one-pointed love of God, a religion freed from the stifling influences of caste, country, race, language, conflicting creeds, petty cruel gods and inhuman sacrifices, freed from the dialectics of learned scriptures."

The safest bet is to have trust in the Siddhas and be patient for this flower to bloom from within as Ramalinga Adigal sings. In saying Siddhas I do not mean those who claim to be Siddhas but the Siddhas of the past who are still around and waiting for our call to enter our lives. Have a safe journey. 

Thursday 29 June 2023

A CHANGE IN THE RELATIONSHIP

From God that was introduced through Sariyai by our parents and their parents and ancestors before them, with an element of devotion and fear instilled, with the coming of the Guru we take things into our hands to correct and set right our lives with his guidance. The Siddhas for instance speak to us through the Nadi. Taking heed of their words when we start working to rectify and make good our past deeds, a journey of discovery of our purpose in taking birth and why we are here follows. They come as father and mother giving us direction and showing their affection respectively. They teach us the ways of the Siddhas, the path that they too took on to attain Siddhahood. Taking heed of the rituals and the yogic practices given, we sail through both these phases of Kriyai and Yogam smoothly without any hiccups and safely without any problems or danger. By this time we have been transformed from the Asudha Degam or impure nature to the Suddha Degam or pure nature, and into the Pranava Degam, or the nature of the Prapanjam. Finally, we stand before God to receive Gnana which results in Gnana Degam. The Siddha upon seeing one as having the potential to be molded into one of their kind, enters his life, then helps transform him and brings him before God. With their grace, the final phase of the journey starts. This is the stage of the merger into Oli Degam or Light. This is the "mystic union which is the goal of bridal mysticism" says G.Vanmikanathan in describing Ramalinga Adigal's final moment of union with the Lord in his book "Pathway to God Trod by Saint Ramalingar", Bharatiya Vidya Bhavan, Bombay. 

"In a span of about fifteen years, what was unrelieved misery had become metamorphosed into joy. This is not the effect of the passage of time which dulls the edge of misery, but a genuine change in the outlook on what seemed like misery. This is the result of the affinity - a spiritual rapport between Raamalinga Swaamikal and the Godhead, which has grown stronger and stronger with the years, a rapport that has grown into the relationship of bride and bridegroom."

Though it might seem as if I was in a hurry to kick him out of the house after Agathiyar told me that he was moving house, by immediately packing his clothes and things, and calling Mahindren over, it was in view of my greed upon hearing his promise to bestow me first before leaving. Was I wrong then in wanting something of that degree immediately? But G.Vanmikanathan too writes the same. Ramalinga Adigal now in his 35th year sets out to Thillai... "the royal road to union with the Godhead."

"Our Swaamikal declares that he is freed from misery. Secondly, he states that he has received a great boon. Thirdly, he, declares that he has reached a great state of grace."

"The Swaamikal shifts the blame from himself to the Lord Whom he accuses of delaying the bestowal of grace. Our Swaamikal will very soon be leaving the Illuminative Way and will be crossing the threshold of the Unitive Way where God with name and form will disappear and where ultimately the worshiper and the worshiped, the seeker and the sought, the soul and the Godhead, will merge into each other,.."

"We see the budding of the concept of Arut-perum-jothi, the Great Effulgence of Grace, for the first time in our Swaamikal’s spiritual life. .... this is the first gleam of the concept of the rare great effulgence which will burst forth in a paean of praise of 1596 lines when our Swaamikal steps on to the last lap of the journey on the Unitive Way."

"Our Swaamikal is now ready for the highest of all possible acts of grace, the crowning glory of the long years of thavam. The conferment of the Effulgence of Grace. The Lord, out of His munificent grace, bestowed on our Swaamikal the very power by which He Himself exercised sovereignty over all the worlds. That power is the Great Effulgence of Grace.... that of being given by the Lord the power to exercise the five functions of creation, sustenance, destruction, concealing, and bestowing mukthi."

After having gained all the Siddhis and attained the highest possible state, a man of such stature, Ramalinga Adigal chose to stay away from the limelight but the Lord acts otherwise.

"The Son of Man has become the Son of God, and he who was unknown and who did not want to be known was dragged much against his will to discharge his preordained mission on earth, to commence his ministry on earth, in order to establish the Pure Universal True Path to God, a path, a religion, based on compassion towards all creatures on earth, a religion based on intense and one-pointed love of God, a religion freed from the stifling influences of caste, country, race, language, conflicting creeds, petty cruel gods and inhuman sacrifices, freed from the dialectics of learned scriptures."

In his "Satthiya Arivippu sung on the 30th January 1874, and concluded just sixty minutes before our Swaamikal vanished forever from the ken of mankind, he sings:

My Sire, my Monseigneur,
the Lord of my soul,
comes today and takes seat
at the place where I am.
In the two and a half naazhikai-s which follow,
He will blend with my grand body
and will abide in my heart
without ever departing therefrom.
By the strength of my great thavam,
I proclaim with full knowledge of what I am saying
“This is the truth, the truth indeed!”
Oh damsel with waist which resembles lightning,
my words will become clear to you
when two and a half naazhikai-s are past!"

THE LOVING FATHER

Just as Andy Williams sings the lines, "That anywhere I go I'm never lonely, With her around, who could be lonely," in the song "Where Do I Begin", Agathiyar came a couple of days ago and said the same to me as I shared my loneliness on this journey with him.

Since the beginning I had kept to myself, minding my business, keeping with only the students from my town while schooling. It was in the upper secondary that I initiated and made myself President of the newly formed Indian Club at school. Soon I came to meet students from all over the country who took up an engineering course in college with me in 1977. Settling in a new job in 1980, I began to work with senior people and people from all walks of life. When I began my search to know Agathiyar after I was introduced to his Nadi in 2002, my circle of friends expanded to include those who followed Agathiyar too. Agathiyar send some thirty youths over to my home, which became AVM, in 2013 to watch me and my family conduct Siddha puja. When I took optional retirement in 2016, I guess I had made many acquaintances in my life by then. Then in 2019 in a timely manner, as the world was to go into a state of lockdown in numerous places, Agathiyar locked us in before that ending the puja and charity programs and drawing the shutters down at AVM. Again I kept to myself communicating with others only by phone and social media. After the lockdowns were lifted and we moved into the Endemic phase, Agathiyar in the form of the bronze statue at AVM visited several homes. Lately, after Lord Murugan conveyed Tavayogi's wish to see each home become AVM he was invited again. Except for these rare occasions of puja and the occasional visits by a handful of devotees of his, I spent my time alone again. Over the weekend as I felt extremely lonely and fear crept into me, I picked up his statue and placed him on the sofa and watched some short films and listened to some of my favorite songs. 

Agathiyar came to comfort me a couple of days later. Agathiyar surprised me by inviting me to sit with him in meditation that day. As I knelt close before him, he held out his hands and held them. ஷண்முக வா. என்னோடு தியானம் செய்.

Then he spoke about moving to Mahindren's home again. When my wife asked him the reason he replied that rituals have to continue to his statue. Since he had halted all forms of worship at AVM and since my wife and I had to move on he would not be able to lead us there if we continued doing these rituals. 

விக்கிரஹம் என்று இருந்தால் அதற்கான பூஜைகள் செய்யவேண்டும் 
இங்கு நீங்கள் பூஜைகள் தொடர்ந்து செய்து கொண்டே இருந்தால் 
உங்கள் இலக்குக்கு நான் இட்டு செல்ல முடியாது 

When he came some time back I had asked him what I was to do since he had brought a stop to all things. He replied, "Do Nothing!" pointing out to me that Tavayogi too did nothing. The energies inherent in us and activated by the years of puja to the Siddhas will do their work. He complimented us for our devotion all these years and then asked how it felt to be doing nothing. சும்மா இருக்கும் சுகத்தை அனுபவிக்கின்றாயா?

When I told him about the sudden fear that arises in these moments of solitude, he surprised me by listing the reasons to drop my unknown fear.

You kept me by your side. 
என்னை அருகில் அமரவைத்தாய் 

Why worry when you speak my name the whole day long?
நாள் தோறும் என் நாமம் சொல்லி கொண்டு இருக்கும் போது என்ன கவலை?

Why the loneliness when my daughter (my wife) is with you?
என் மகள் உன்னோடு இருக்கும் போது என்ன தனிமை?

Why the loneliness when the Prapanjam is with you?
பிரபஞ்சமே உன்னோடு இருக்கும் போது என்ன தனிமை?

Why do you fear loneliness?
நீ ஏன் தனிமையை கண்டு பயப்படுகின்றாய்?

That is the love of our father who comes to us to assure us that all is well and he is with us.

With her first hello,
She gave new meaning to this empty world of mine,
There'd never be another love, another time,
She came into my life and made the living fine,
She fills my heart,
She fills my heart with very special things,
With angels' songs, with wild imaginings,
She fills my soul with so much love,
That anywhere I go I'm never lonely,
With her around, who could be lonely,
I reach for her hand, it's always there

TARGET, EFFORT & GRACE

Just as television networks compete to gain viewers, YouTubers seek more views, and bloggers' eye readership counts, it is all about numbers and means and ways to achieve the given or desired or competed targets. If only we would target the same in our spiritual ventures. Many believe that there is a standard time to venture into this pool that comes with age. The many child saints though have proved us wrong. When I met Tavayogi I asked why I had only come to know the Siddhas late in life at the age of 43. Rather than give soothing answers he told me to be grateful that it happened then. I came to understand later that many never get to see or get a glimpse of this life. 

Today Agathiyar tells me that though he was placing all the efforts to bring about a transformation in me, due to my age I shall have to bear the consequences of raising the energies in old age. Similarly, both Agathiyar and Bhogar told another devotee in her sixties that she will have to go through the pain and discomfort. So did the Siddhas work on Jnana Jothiamma too but Agathiyar told me after her demise that her body could not take it. But as Tavayogi told us that we shall come again and again and work on it and Supramania Swami told us that we shall polish it till it shines, it is a long journey back home unless the divine comes to our aid and hastens the journey. 

Here is where the grace of the divine is essential to place the ladder in our home ground and catapult us to higher levels bypassing the number of years if we were to walk on foot as in the game of snakes and ladders. But often on our journey, we tend to stop at numerous places and bridges or arrive at crossroads where we stand and stare and contemplate if we should make the jump, take the leap, or plunge but leave it for another moment as in this clip of a game.


Then again if we were to plan our spiritual undertaking we shall never get started. We have to be swept off our feet by his grace. For that to happen we have to implore and beg of him to come. This is indeed the meaning of carrying out prayers, not asking for our individual needs and desires to be fulfilled, but to have him come and take ownership of us and lead us back to his kingdom. Otherwise, we would spend years roaming and searching for the way that leads us there.

AASAI

If there was one guru whom we came to know never touched money it was Chitramuthu Adigal. Tavayogi who spoke about him and Jeganathar in 2005, shared this when he visited us in 2016. 


When many masters, gurus, and heads of missions sought donations, and when donations flow in, besides cash, gifts from devotees and followers, that at times turn out to be posh vehicles too, are accepted. I wonder why can't they ask that the latter be converted into cash that would go a long way to maintain the running of their establishments, ensure continued puja is carried out and can feed thousands who turn up. There is a song "Kambeduththaal Aadum Kuranggu" lyric that questions why devotees keep dumping gifts at the feet of Lord Muruga of Palani when he stands only in a loincloth having shed all likes and dislikes for material things. Watch from 13.15 minutes.

... பழனிமலையில் கோவணம் தவிர எது இருந்தது, 

தெய்வமே ஆசையை துறந்து மண்ணில் எழுந்தது, 

வேண்டுதல் காணிக்கை சுமையோ வந்து குவிந்தது ...


God leaves the temple when fight for power and authority emerges among its committee. Goddess Ma who came through a devotee told another that she was no more residing in the temple but would appear when a sincere soul comes to worship. Similarly, our Paramaguru too told us that he was not in his abode and samadhi as we understand that it was an invasion of his privacy by others. But he added that he would appear before his true devotees. He also revealed that he was residing elsewhere now. Goddess Ma told Jnana Jothiamma that the divine has left a guru when he deviated in his ways. When she was asked why people still thronged his place, Ma replied they could not possibly know of her absence as the guru keeps them believing that she comes within him and is in him. Agathiyar too stopped appearing before another when falsehood raised its hood. Divinity leaves the moment injustice and dishonesty creep in. 

I believe we should only talk about the greatness of God, the divine, the gurus, and others and lead them, if and only when we have adopted their teachings and put them to the test, emulate their ways, and gained the same experiences that they went through. Otherwise, it is just a research paper that we keep delivering and we have not lived it to verify their experiences. It would be akin to vomiting whatever we heard and read. 

The greatest gift a disciple awaits from the guru is the words coming from his lips that we are his best student. No other gift or Siddhi can equal these words of endorsement that we are on the right track. When gurus need to watch over us and remind us to stay on track, a disciple who heeds the guru's words never steps out of line. He works to see through the wishes of his master. He takes care that he does not taint nor mar his master's name and image in all his actions.


Wednesday 28 June 2023

LET US DO GOD'S WORK

We are always expecting something from God, the divine, the guru, or another. Seldom do we come across true devotion or selfless service. We start a group, society, movement, or organization in their name and begin to host programs thinking that we are doing service to and in the name of God, the divine, the guru, or another. But never for a moment have we asked what God, the divine, the guru, or another want. Bharathi sings beautifully in his song "Ninnai Saran Adaithen Kannama" that all misery that aroused from expecting results for his efforts came to an end when he took up God's work and became satisfied.

தன்செய லெண்ணித் தவிப்பது தீர்ந்திங்கு
நின்செயல் செய்து நிறைவு பெறும்வண்ணம்
நின்னை சரணடைந்தேன், கண்ணம்மா
நின்னை சரணடைந்தேன்


We are like sheep following others, duplicating things. The needs differ according to time and place. Hence the approach too should differ. It is alright to trend the time-tested ways but what if it was a waste of time and effort and energy in present times. Would not it be a challenge to pioneer and engineer new ways and approaches? Then again would not it be better to carry out God's work as Bharathi did and arrive at a state of Puranam or completeness and satisfaction. 

Tuesday 27 June 2023

Finding Shiva & Discovering Devi

When one finds and discovers "the love of their life" there is no way they would stay home or return to their old shed respectively. Expression of love for God comes in many ways. Some might sing of the charm and beauty of the divine before them. Others might pour their deep feelings of ecstasy that overcome them in these moments of encounter. Yet others might dance in rhythm with the energy flow that they get acquainted with. 







GIVING DUE RESPECT

When Agathiyar came last evening, he revealed the reason he was moving house. He told us that every murthy or statue of Gods and Gurus has to be worshipped and rituals done. As he had brought a stop to all forms of rituals at AVM, these rituals shall henceforth be continued at Mahindren's house. Hence the reason for this move.

When Agathiyar came in this form in 2010 to my home he directed us in the Nadi to recite his name 100,000 times and conduct libation for him using nine items, telling me that we have to give (breath) life to (into) it.

When a group of devotees initiated the move and placed a bronze statue of Agathiyar at a temple in the city, Agathiyar asked the one who placed him there in the Nadi if it was enough that he place it there and not do the rituals. Now an annual celebration is held here.

Just some weeks back he spoke to the host about the need to recite or chant the name of the gurus if we decide to have their pictures, paintings or photos at the altar too. 

Many years back he asked someone who placed a painting of the Siddhas on the wall of his living room whether it was a decorative item. 

Statues, paintings, photos and pictures of Gods and Gurus are not decorative items that adorn and beautify the home. We have to respect and pay homage by way of conducting rituals or reciting or chanting their names. 

Many years back during my search to learn more about the Siddhas through reading books on them, I walked into a bookshop that also sold statues of Gods. Sadly these were placed on the floor where we tend to accidentally walk into them. I told the salesperson that we should pay respect to our deities, although they are only mere granite stones until the proper rituals are done to energize and bring life to it. On a later visit I was happy to see that they had renovated the shop and had a room exclusively alocated to place all the statues. Nothing was on the floor now. 

Monday 26 June 2023

KNOWING ONE'S GURU

I had a young couple drop by my home last afternoon. He used to read the blog. He had been doing some meditation practice handed over by a well-known guru from a well-known lineage of past gurus that leads to Agathiyar and Bhogar. He told me that he was contemplating taking up an initiation from another. His question was how do we know who is our guru? 

I told him that Dattatreya was said to have 24 gurus. Though he said that "the Atman alone was his Guru, yet, he had learned wisdom from 24 individuals, who were, therefore, his Gurus too. They were namely: 1. Earth, 2. Water, 3. Air, 4. Fire, 5. Sky, 6. Moon, 7. Sun, 8. Pigeon, 9. Python, 10. Ocean, 11. Moth, 12. Bee, 13. Honey-gatherer, 14. Elephant, 15. Deer, 16. Fish, 17. Dancing-girl Pingala, 18. Raven, 19. Child, 20. Maiden, 21.Serpent, 22. An arrow-maker, 23. Spider and 24. Beetle." (Source: https://sivanandayogafarm.org/)

But unlike Dattatreya, we might settle for one or two as I did. I believe there was a call from Agathiyar for me to see my Nadi in 2002. He initiated the conversation I had with my colleague as my colleague started sharing his experience reading the Nadi two years earlier. I had heard about the Nadi mentioned earlier in 1996 when I frequented Dr. Krishnan, a Siddha physician, and Astrologer. The Dr. had asked me to see mine since I wanted to know if I was cursed in some past birth. The Dr. had mentioned that a curse might stand in our way to reap and attain the good that was to come our way as predicted in our horoscopes. Only the Siddhas and their Nadi could reveal if we were cursed he added. True to what he said Agathiyar spoke about my past karma and curses that deprived me of the benefits of all my attempts and efforts in life and career, religious and spiritual ventures, and yogic practices too. They were a stumbling block and I was told to carry out remedies to overcome them. After I carried them out as dictated, and was about to leave India back to Malaysia, the door opened mysteriously. I was brought to meet my first guru Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai. Although Agathiyar had revealed that he was my Moola Guru in my Nadi reading, he told that I would meet my physical guru soon too. He brought me to Supramania Swami in the flesh because I believe I had to meet him, again in this birth, to fulfill his forty-year desire to see a temple built. As we set upon carrying out the venture a Siddha came around to stop him from continuing. 

Three years on Agathiyar initiates me mysteriously to call and enquire about a visiting swami who had come to officiate an affiliate branch of his Kallar Ashram in India. I brought a leaflet seeking donations to build a temple for Agathiyar in Kallar that was passed to me during my Nadi reading in 2002 to Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal asking if he was the one in the leaflet. And so the bond was rekindled between guru and disciple. Agathiyar again showed me, my guru. 

Prior to these two meetings, I had never been in search of masters or gurus though I would stand in line with others to receive blessings from visiting saints and sadhus who dropped by at the local temples in places I stayed in. Even after coming to accept Supramania Swami and Tavayogi as my physical gurus, Agathiyar kept asking me to visit other holy men and gurus and places of importance to them, but I put my feet down and told him that I was not going anywhere anymore. I told him that I had Supramania Swami, Tavayogi, and him. That was enough. If at all he wanted to give me something let that happen within the four walls of my home. He stopped speaking about it further. 

Today I believe that they have settled in comfortably in my heart and home. I believe that I too have settled in comfortably with them and I believe that I have a place in their hearts as well. Agathiyar revealed that just as we sat and spoke about them all the time they too used to speak about us. We are deeply indebted for their love and care. I am grateful that Agathiyar initiated me to see his Nadi that had come to reveal my gurus and him. 

But what about those who had not seen their Nadi or it is not mentioned? Where do they go for guidance? Before I could answer his question his fiance told me that he was in a hurry. I told him that that was the divine's answer that was relayed through here. I too told him to be patient and that the divine will show the way and the path and lead them to their guru. I believe that the divine will show them the way just as they where brought to AVM after reading this blog. 

GOD THE IMPERSONATOR

Someone had asked a friend to put before me a question after following this blog. 

Dear Bala, could you ask Shanmugam *aiya if he is there, why Agasthiyar always instructs lighting a lamp as a way of seeking his grace? Is there a clear reason behind it? Asked by little niece who just received her 1st aasi and read to her on Wednesday.

I told him to answer her but he shied away. I replied, "Tell her "yen yetarkku yendru ketkaamal seithidavum. Athen artham pinnaalil teriyavarum. Yeduta maathirathil kelvi kethom aanaal yetanaiyum seiya tavari viduvom." I asked her to carry out what was told. The reasons will dawn later. If one starts questioning everything he will never get started or get anywhere. 

Just days ago chatting with someone who reads my blog, we agreed that many when initiated into a mantra the first thing they ask is "How many times should I say it?", followed by the next question, "For how long?" Others might share it with others and come to realize that they have been given a slight variation of the mantra. They become disturbed and confused and begin to investigate further hence failing to get started on the mantra. I believe that I have come this far because I obeyed what was said by the Siddhas to the very word never investigating further. I get my answers in due time as they make it known to me later, at times after several years.

Another devotee and friend had asked me many years back why we need to praise God? I told him it was not for him but for us. Something subtle takes place when we praise another be it god or man. Coming back to the question about the reason behind lighting a lamp or singing their praise for that matter I believe we are blessed to be given all the organs of sense - eyes, ears, nose, tongue, and skin so that we use them to pay our respects to the divine. One of the Nayanmar, Thirunavukarasar did just that composing a Pathigam too. I remember learning this song and many others as a kid from an elderly man from Ceylon who gathered the kids and taught us Thevaram. 

தலையே நீவணங்காய் - தலை
மாலை தலைக்கணிந்து 
தலையா லேபலி தேருந் தலைவனைத் 
தலையே நீவணங்காய். 1

கண்காள் காண்மின்களோ - 
கடல் நஞ்சுண்ட கண்டன்றன்னை 
எண்டோள் வீசிநின் றாடும் பிரான்றன்னைக் 
கண்காள் காண்மின்களோ. 2

செவிகாள் கேண்மின்களோ - 
சிவன் எம்மிறை செம்பவள எரிபோல் 
மேனிப்பி ரான்றிறம் எப்போதுஞ் 
செவிகாள் கேண்மின்களோ. 3

மூக்கே நீமுரலாய் - 
முது காடுறை முக்கணனை வாக்கே 
நோக்கிய மங்கை மணாளனை 
மூக்கே நீமுரலாய். 4

வாயே வாழ்த்துகண்டாய் - 
மத யானை யுரிபோர்த்துப் பேய்வாழ் 
காட்டகத் தாடும் பிரான்றன்னை 
வாயே வாழ்த்துகண்டாய். 5

நெஞ்சே நீநினையாய் - 
நிமிர் புன்சடை நின்மலனை 
மஞ்சா டும்மலை மங்கை மணாளனை 
நெஞ்சே நீநினையாய். 6

கைகாள் கூப்பித்தொழீர் - 
கடி மாமலர் தூவிநின்று 
பைவாய்ப் பாம்பரை யார்த்த பரமனைக் 
கைகாள் கூப்பித்தொழீர். 7

ஆக்கை யாற்பயனென் - 
அரன் கோயில் வலம்வந்து பூக்கை 
யாலட்டிப் போற்றி யென்னாதவிவ் 
வாக்கை யாற்பயனென். 8

கால்க ளாற்பயனென் - 
கறைக் கண்ட னுறைகோயில் 
கோலக் கோபுரக் கோகர ணஞ்சூழாக் 
கால்க ளாற்பயனென். 9

உற்றா ராருளரோ - 
உயிர் கொண்டு போம்பொழுது 
குற்றா லத்துறை கூத்தனல் லால்நமக் 
குற்றார் ஆருளரோ. 10

இறுமாந் திருப்பன்கொலோ - 
ஈசன் பல்கணத் தெண்ணப்பட்டுச் சிறுமா 
னேந்திதன் சேவடிக் கீழ்ச்சென்றங் 
கிறுமாந் திருப்பன்கொலோ. 11

தேடிக் கண்டுகொண்டேன் - 
திரு மாலொடு நான்முகனுந் தேடித் 
தேடொணாத் தேவனை என்னுளே 
தேடிக் கண்டுகொண்டேன். 12

(Source: https://shaivam.org)

There you have it Appar spells out what each organ has to do, given this wonderful birth. We have seen how the Buddhist devotees make their way to holy places taking a few steps, raising their arms high before falling to the ground on their knees and stomachs and getting up to do the same all the way till they reach the holy spot. That is total devotion and surrender of the ego that brings on humbleness and piety.

As Thirunavukarasar sings
 
தேடிக் கண்டுகொண்டேன் - 
திரு மாலொடு நான்முகனுந் தேடித் 
தேடொணாத் தேவனை என்னுளே 
தேடிக் கண்டுகொண்டேன்,

that he found God residing within him, we are knocking on the wrong door I believe. We are like sheep following the crowd. We fail to see that God might be in the places least expected. Yet we keep heading to the places we are told he resides or rather "established" by man. When Tavayogi and I arrived at the Big temple in Tanjavur in the heat of the day, Tavayogi spread his shawl on the ground under the shade of a tree and invited me to join him in taking a short nap while awaiting the doors to the temple to be opened at 4pm. But I opted to scout around. As  I happened to come to the architect of this temple and Siddha Karuvurar's sannadhi and temple a priest who was there doing his chores preparing for the evening puja upon seeing me got up to show the flame and passed it to me. I returned to the spot Tavayogi was napping and lay down beside him. When the temple bells rang at 4pm Tavayogi got up and went behind the temple to Karuvurar's sannadhi instead of following the crowd that had assembled quickly upon hearing the bells sound to enter the main shrine. Tavayogi sat down to meditate at Karuvurar's shrine. I followed him. I then heard a loud conversation around me. Opening my eyes I saw a group of teens chatting noisily. The priest who was still around shooed them away pointing to Tavayogi and me and telling them that we were meditating. After connecting with Karuvurar Tavayogi began to leave the temple grounds. I called out if he wasn't going to go in into the main temple and shrine. He asks me "Do you want to go? Go then" and chose to remain outside. I went in and saw Abhisegam done for the huge linga. I came out and joined him in a jiffy. Similarly, he only stepped in into the inner sanctum of Goddess Madurai Meenakshi after I voiced my desire to see her. So did he walk straight to Pambatti Siddhar's cave instead of the main sanctum at Maruthamalai. Osho says that the energy is not in the inner sanctum but it is offset some distance away from it. If we are aware we would spot it either as a small shrine, samadhi, or even a God impersonating someone. True to his words as I recall now I realized that God indeed came as common people before us in all the temples we stepped in either saying something that would surprise us or jolt us or passing something into our hands unexpectedly. Read through these pages of the blog and you shall find that I have shared these many moments. 

BOUNDLESS LOVE

Just a couple of days ago as no one was around over the weekend, I was alone watching short films and listening to songs. Agathiyar was sitting as the murthy or statue just across the floor in his room. He too was alone. I invited him to sit with me and watch. I picked up his 18-kilo statue and placed him on the sofa beside me and we both watch and listened to what was playing. What was missing was the popcorn. As I became drowsy I told him that I shall send him back to his spot. When I picked him up he would not budge. He was suddenly pretty heavy. I knew he wasn't moving. I played more songs until I asked him shall we retire for the night. This time I could lift him. Sharing it with a friend and devotee he quipped jokingly that "Appa wanted to watch another movie" hence refusing to move. Another friend suggested I watch with him his movie "Agathiyar" so that he can authenticate the facts shown and depicted in it. As I wrote in the previous post the relationship with Agathiyar which started in awe, fear, and devotion, and that turned to respect and honor accepting him as a guru, and later seeing him as a fatherly and motherly figure and often quite unexpectedly turning into that of a friend and buddy, I laughed at myself thinking what took place.

Similarly during the last Sivarathri puja at AVM, as we waited for the 3am puja I played a collection of songs that I had compiled for the occasion, we were not aware of Yogi Ramsuratkumar's arrival and presence in a devotee until he placed his hand over my shoulder and hugged and spoke to me. When my wife stepped up to him next, he revealed himself as the beggar. She immediately recognized him as Yogi Ramsuratkumar for only he addresses himself as the beggar. Apparently, the Yogi had come the moment I started playing Sadhu Om's songs on Arunachala and Bhagawan Ramana, set to music and rendered by Sriram Parthasarathy. The Yogi told my wife "Can you play the song again" mentioning Sadhu Om's "Unadhu Thiruvarule". It is understandable that the Yogi sat and listened to these songs of Sadhu Om as like him, Sadhu Om was a disciple of Bhagawan too. 

Though Andal, Meera, and Radha, the Nayanmars in the 6th to 8th centuries CE, and Ramalinga Adigal as recent as 200 years ago, have all expressed this love to the divine, who can we possibly fall back to now who exhibited this pure love than Bharathi who lived some 100 years ago. Bharathi's love for the divine whom he chose to name and call Kannama is boundless. Just listen to his songs and you shall sense this love run through you touching the very soul. This love and affection for the divine has blossomed into love as in lovers. 


Saturday 24 June 2023

THE RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD

It is difficult being God I have come to realize. I sympathize with him. Poor God. Imagine he has to sit and watch all the stupid things we do, watch us miss our foot and fall, watch us fall for dubious characters and their words of promise, watch us miss the bus for an important appointment, etc, and yet not able to move or act. For how can he be in so many places at one time or can he? Then there are those who want it to rain while others want the sun to shine. Then there are those who decide on their love and life partner, decide on their businesses and investments having signed the contracts, and stand before him for his blessings. Of course, he blesses all our ventures. What else could we expect him to do at that juncture. Though he is all-knowing and not telling, we would never know if that was going to be good or bad for us. We have to understand that we have to face the consequences of all our actions. 

Life is a butterfly effect where everything we do creates a ripple effect. Though he is a good listener don't expect him to grant our wishes for then he would have to change the whole course of events just to accommodate our wish. This is the understanding we had prior to believing in the Siddhas. If once we thought that life was rigid and fate and destiny were written in stone, coming to the Siddhas we have come to understand that it need not be the case. Fate can be rewritten. A new destiny can be charted together. While only the Siddha can change our fate we have an equal share in charting a new destiny with the Siddhas. It is as simple as following their dictates. Life then begins to flourish. Finally, we arrive at an acceptance of things knowing that "I am not this body. I am this expanse."

The relationship with Agathiyar which started in awe, fear, and devotion, and that turned to respect and honor accepting him as a guru, and later seeing him as a fatherly and motherly figure and often quite unexpectedly turning into that of a friend and buddy soon blossomed into love as in lovers. Sharing this with Acharya Gurudasan from Bangalore last night, he messaged me the following. 

"Beautifully put, uncle. They're very playful...And they are happy to play any role in any kind of relationship with sincere disciples...And not just as a formal guru figure.

தாயாகி த‌ந்தையாகி நண்பனாகி காதலராகி ஊணாகி உணர்வுமாகி நானுமாகிய பராபரமே!!"

How true. Today he stands before us or rather is in us as the feeling and vibration that is in the Prapanjam.

A SHORT STORY

Watching the short film "Mumbai Varanasi Express" the lead actor writes a note to his children and leaves for Varanasi to await his death as his doctor had diagnosed him as having colon cancer and having the most only two months to live. 

He writes, "I have not lived my life. I had only existed. Now I want to live it. Whatever time left I would like to devout to myself." A year passes by. He regains his health and heads back to Mumbai to save his failing business left in charge to his children.

Remembering the words of a co-passenger who alighted at the Surat station on his way to Varanasi back then, he decides to taste the delicacy that was said to be the best in town. Fate has it that he is knocked down and dies, not in Varanasi but in Surat.

This reminds me of a story told where on hearing a knock on his door a man who knew Lord Yama had come for him opens the door. But Lord Yama has a surprised look on his face and leaves without saying a thing.  Some time later the man who is now in another country to attend to his business hears a knock on his door and opens it to find Lord Yama standing before him. His life is taken. 

Do not rejoice that you have been given an extension or escaped death. It is just that you are not in the right place and time for it to happen as yet. We are a victim of time and space. The Siddhas are beyond both and live forever. 

GO GREEN

I used to frequent a Chinese vegetarian restaurant in town for my needs since some years back. It was only today that I asked the owner and chef if he was a full-time vegetarian. He replied "No. Only twice a month" which I knew was the night of the full moon and the night when the moon was not in sight. I was so pleased with him that I thanked him. Though he consumed meat on other days he was providing us with genuine vegetarian meals and noodles that are hard to come by these days. And he himself cooks it so tasty. If a vegetarian opens a vegetarian outlet it does not surprise us. But being a meat eater serving us vegetarians was a big deal for me. Then there is someone else who deserves to be praised too. When vegetarians are not given due respect as we see from the menu served where the same pitiful vegetarian dishes are served day in and day out and are there only for the sake of being an accompaniment to other meat dishes in most food outlets we came across someone who ran an outlet in another nearby town, though not completely vegetarian but who catered for vegetarians and only had meat and fish as side dishes in a small quantity and in a small corner of his shop. The Indian owner visits each table to chat and get to know his customers too. Here is a man who respects vegetarians. 

We can give numerous reasons to turn into a vegetarian. Many asked me the reason to become one, whether it was for medical reasons or religious beliefs. I had no reason at all. In fact, I just decided to become one overnight. It is 25 years since I became a vegetarian. I am glad I did because I came to know the need to be one if we are to walk the path of the Siddhas and achieve Siddhahood. This was made known to Jnana Jothiamma in her Nadi reading by Agathiyar. As she was molded into one, Agathiyar told her that she had to bear the pain and suffering in expelling the toxin that was accumulated through the years of intake of meat. She was already in her sixties when she came to the path. But her love for Agathiyar and his way gave her strength and courage to go through the torment that resulted as the transformation in her body began to take place. For instance, she shared with me that she was vomiting as many as 32 times a day as her body began to purge and cleanse and purify itself. There was no other way to it. Neither was there any other escape route. So to those who seek to enter the path and reach the destination, it is important that they sustain a meatless diet for it is easier and faster to purify the body right until the very cells. The Asuddha Degam once purified becomes the Suddha Degam. When one is very well into the path and has reached its zenith he does not feed even on grains and greens then. His gross and physical body which itself is meat is transformed into a subtle body. This is the Pranava Degam. Here then we see compassion in its greatest form. As did Ramalinga Adigal's heart cry out seeing the crops wither in the heat of the sun, his compassion went beyond humans and animals and included the plant kingdom too. 

Another factor that plays an important part in whether one achieves the desired transformation and state is one's age. If Tavayogi told me that he could not possibly transform his body into light as he was way past his sixties then in 2005, Agathiyar told me the same too that the body cannot bend to the strenuous regime of the transformation that takes place in old age. Hence he has begun to work on the younger generation. Telling a teen to take up yoga he pointed to the fact that he had to work extra hard on a young adult in his thirties to get him to bend his torso. Though the teens are the ideal age where the body is pliable, it is never too late to start as he had asked my father-in-law in his eighties to do the sun salutation pose daily. And turning to me, Agathiyar told me not to disappoint him as he had put in much work trying to get me there. I am grateful to him. 

These days as I immerse in joy and bliss that comes on unannounced I wish I could share that with others too. I wish others can share their time doing what I do these days too. 

TELLING A LOVE STORY


If Andy Williams begins the theme song from the movie "Love Story" with 

Where do I begin
To tell the story of how great a love can be
The sweet love story that is older than the sea
The simple truth about the love she brings to me
Where do I start

so too I ask myself where shall I start to tell the story of my love for Agathiyar? 

Though he tells me that we have known each other in many previous lives, sadly I do not remember any. If only he would bring me to these places and have me recall my past births and our relationship then as Mahavatar Babaji showed Lahari Mahasaya. But he did mention them in my Nadi reading. In fact, my present family members were with me in a past birth at Papanasam. My wife and I were trading fruits. My daughter would place a fruit at Agathiyar's feet at this temple. So we are not strangers it seems. In this birth, knocking on my door, he came for me when I was 43 years of age through my very first Nadi reading. He had me knock on the door of Supramania Swami on the pretext of charting my daughter's horoscope and had me discover my first guru in a village some eight kilometers away from the town of Tiruvannamalai. Here too was a bond linked to a previous life and I had to serve Supramania Swami for the short time I knew him before his samadhi in 2007. Passing me a leaflet earlier in 2002 that would have me knock on the door of Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar Ashram when he visited Malaysia in 2005, Agathiyar brought us together. Tavayogi on the other hand instead of taking the limelight showed me to Agathiyar, starting a period of courtship of some eighteen years, that has ended in matrimony today.

The love affair goes on each day. We have become inseparable. His love for me overshadows mine. The only difference between our loves is that his love is all-compassing and without conditions, while mine is limited and comes with conditions. I do most of the fighting and tend to throw tantrums like a child most of the time. He on the other hand is very patient and bears all the stomping around that this spoilt kid does. He is a father, mother, guru, friend, wife, and lover. After a 21-year relationship and living in with me now, he tells me he wants to move out and live with Mahindren and his family. I was not saddened but overjoyed that he was now going to fill another devotee's heart and home with his love. 

With her first hello
She gave new meaning to this empty world of mine
There'd never be another love, another time
She came into my life and made the living fine
She fills my heart

She fills my heart with very special things
With angels' songs, with wild imaginings
She fills my soul with so much love
That anywhere I go I'm never lonely
With her around, who could be lonely
I reach for her hand, it's always there

How long does it last
Can love be measured by the hours in a day
I have no answers now but this much I can say
I know I'll need her 'til the stars all burn away
And she'll be there

His love was so great that he forgives us for all our stupidity, ignorance, and arrogance. Indeed Agathiyar assured and comforted me that though he was going to move house he would be there for me. 

Then a senior devotee tells me not to take his word seriously for he might decide to stay put pointing me to the moment when he decided to stay put in my home instead of leaving for the Raghavendra Mrithiga Brindavanam in Ipoh as originally planned in 2010. 

I guess if my heart melted and I teared for him as Engelbert Humperdinck does in the song "A Man Without Love" he might remain at AVM.



I can remember when we walked together
Sharing a love I thought would last forever
Moonlight to show the way so we can follow
Waiting inside her eyes was my tomorrow
Then something changed her mind, her kisses told me
I had no lovin' arms to hold me

Every day I wake up, then I start to break up
Lonely is a man without love
Every day I start out, then I cry my heart out
Lonely is a man without love

Every day I wake up, then I start to break up
Knowing that it's cloudy above
Every day I start out, then I cry my heart out
Lonely is a man without love

I cannot face this world that's fallen down on me
So, if you see my girl, please send her home to me
Tell her about my heart that's slowly dying
Say I can't stop myself from crying

Every day I wake up, then I start to break up
Lonely is a man without love
Every day I start out, then I cry my heart out
Lonely is a man without love

Friday 23 June 2023

TELLING AGATHIYAR'S STORY

Dr. Mandayam Kumar from the Siddha Medical Research Institute in Bangalore gives a short narrative about Agathiyar at http://www.tknsiddha.com/medicine/origin/

"Sage Agastya is stated to have been born nearly 5000 years prior to the commencement of Kali Yuga, at a place in Gujarat, as the son of Bhargava and Indumathi who followed the traditional Pasupatha cult which was widely prevalent at that time."

In another article of his, "Siddha Agastya – Foremost of the Siddhas", passed on to me by Nadi Nool Aasan T. Ramesh many years back, Dr. Mandayam gives more details. I have given a summary of it as follows.

The Dr mentions that it was possible to find out details about Agathiyar during the course of literary research on the Siddha medical sciences in a Tamil manuscript written on palm leaves about 3,000 years ago. The text attributed to Lord Muruga is titled "Prapancha Kaandam" and according to the Dr runs into several volumes. Agathiyar narrated the contents while his student Pulastyar recorded it.

The Dr. reveals for the first time the parental heritage of Agathiyar. Agathiyar was said to have been born about 4573 years prior to the commencement of Kali Yuga at a place in Gujarat, in the early hours of Tuesday, 14 February 7673 BC. Belonging to the early Aryan race, his father Bhargava was well-learned while his mother Indumathi was from Punjab. They were both devotees of the Pasupatha order of Rishabha Muni. 

Agathiyar had his early education in Gujarat. As his thirst for knowledge in particular on philosophy, yoga, medicine, and astronomy was immense, he traveled all over Kashmir, Tibet, China, Nepal, and Kailas in Manchuria. (Mount Kailas was deemed to be in Manchuria during that time). He became a disciple of Nandi and Dhanvantri. He then traveled towards the south to Cambodia and Malaya (present-day Malaysia). In Cambodia, he established the very first of his many educational institutions for the propagation of philosophy and science. After establishing a similar institution and hospital in Malaya, he crossed the sea to the continent of Kumari Kandam (during Agathiyar’s time, Kumari Kandam occupied a vast area extending from present-day Sri Lanka to the Antarctic. King Ravana, a great devotee of Lord Shiva, who ruled this continent gave away a portion of his kingdom to Agathiyar to establish more institutions. The foremost of these institutions in this region was known as Arunodaya Giri or Meozone. Here Agathiyar practiced Yoga and taught it to his large following of disciples. Agathiyar then went back north to Malaya where he was betrothed to the king’s daughter. He then ruled the kingdom of Vijayapuri. He returned to Kumari Kandam where he met Lord Murugan in the form of Supramaniar at Trikona Malai (present-day Trincomali). At the hill station called Kadari Kama or Kadhirgama, Lord Murugan imparted spiritual knowledge to Agathiyar. 

Dr. Mandayam Kumar says Agathiyar could see impending calamities take place in the future during his meditation. As a result, he moved to the North Pole considering it to be a safe place. This period of his move to the Arctic was said to coincide with the end of the Dwapara Yuga placed at about 6580 BC. Just as he had seen an impending calamity and had decided to move north, a tremendous explosion on the planet Mars sends a piece of debris toward Earth. This impact caused a great deluge on Earth. Significant portions of Kumari Kandam submerged into the Indian Ocean. Continental drift then resulted in the present-day arrangement of this region. After the great flood, the Himalayan mountain range emerged in North India. 

Amidst all these geographical changes, says the Dr, Agathiyar went seeking a place that would not be affected by future calamities. He located a mountain range in South India. This is the present-day Courtalam. This spot is said to be the safest place and free from any future catastrophes. Agathiyar met Lord Dhakshinamurthi, Shenbaga Devi, and Lord Murugan, at Mahadeva Giri in Courtalam. This meeting also signified the commencement of Kali Yuga. Other Siddhas then started coming to Mahadeva Giri. Lord Dhakshinamurthi revived the knowledge of the Vedas and instructed these Siddhas to propagate this knowledge in the appropriate manner and time for the benefit of humanity. The imparting of this knowledge was said to have taken place on the 21st day of the Tamil month of Kartigai, during the eleventh year, Eswara Samvatsara, of Kali Yuga. Agathiyar gave much importance to this day. All his dating was reckoned from this day. 

After extensive discussions held in Alagan Kulam, the Siddhas recorded their knowledge on palm leaves and presented them to Lord Dhakshinamurthi for his perusal. This included the 64 kinds of learning, 18 Puranas, 96 tattvas, and 48 branches of scientific knowledge. Agathiyar on the instruction of Lord Murugan originated the Tamil language. The entire literature in Tamil came to be called "Siddhaveda". It was then translated into the four existing languages of that period which were Sanskrit, Greek, Hebrew, and Chinese. 

Bhogar from China (Agathiyar in the Jeeva Nadi revelation to Hanumathdasan of Chennai says Bhogar was from Mongolia), Thaeraiyar from Malaya, Yugimuni from Kerala, Pulipani from Kantha Malai, and Pulastyar, and Kapiyar all served Agathiyar. A conference of Siddhas called Siddhar Sabai was held during the 53rd year, Siddharti Samvatsara, of Kali Yuga at Courtalam. An institution known as Siddhar Gnana Koodam was inaugurated by Lord Murugan and was headed by Agathiyar. Pulastyar and Kapiyar headed the literary section while Pulipani headed research. Thaeraiyar an exponent in surgery headed a medical research center established at Thorana Malai. Yugimuni who was into herbal medicines headed an Ayurvedic hospital at Paradesi Kundai. Bhogar who was in charge of all scientific research established an alchemy research center at Tiruparankundram. Pambatti headed a team researching venom at Marudamalai. After having established these institutions Agathiyar again started on an extensive mission of propagating the wealth of knowledge gained by these Siddhas in Tibet, Manchuria, Egypt, Palestine, Rome, America, Africa, Malaya, and the Arab world. 

After satisfactorily completing their mission of propagating the said teachings the Siddhas went into samadhi merging themselves into the cosmos. Supramaniar went into samadhi in Thorana Malai, Bhogar in Palani, Thaeraiyar, Pulipani, and Yugimuni in Kantha Malai and Agathiyar himself choose to come back to Courtalam. He chose a spot called Dhashina Meru in the Pothigai hills. This spot is also the abode of Dhakshinamurthi.

Pa. Kamalakannan in "Cittar Uruvil Shivaperuman", Vanathi Pathippakam, 2007 (Kamalakannan, 2007), says Agathiyar married Yasomadhi from Cambodia. Among his children who ruled the land, Yasovarma became a famous ruler.

P. Karthigayan in his "History of Medical and Spiritual Sciences of Siddhas of Tamil Nadu", quotes Bhogar as having mentioned that Agathiyar was from a family of farmers. This little-known fact was mentioned too by Agathiyar in the Nadi reading for AVM. 

P. Karthigayan writes Agathiyar had many mentors including (Lord) Siva and (Lord) Kumaran and an equal number of disciples. Agathiyar in his search for knowledge approached many people from various communities, finally picked up the yogic way, and excelled in it. On achieving the inner glow he took on the name Agathiyar. P. Karthigayan lists out an extensive list of Agathiyar's contributions towards the community and humanity, hence receiving the famed title Gurumuni or great mentor. P. Karthigayan dates Agathiyar's achievements accordingly as pre- and post-Sanga period, whence the establishment of the Sangam or literary academia took place. If during his pre-Sanga days, he was into yogic practices, after the establishment of the Sanga, in his post-Sanga years, he concentrated on medicine and science. He established more Sangams and monasteries, pioneered and promoted the Tamil script and Tamil grammar, collected and compiled the works of the Siddhas and published them, streamlined the Siva faith, and spread the Siddha Marga, and exposed the false teachings, in total bringing a Renaissance. His greatest achievement was his ability to live for four eons, at the time of mention in writing by Bhogar, and still lives among us in present times. Agathiyar is said to have "given rise to 48 generations." 

M. Govindan in "Babaji and the 18 Siddha Kriya Yoga tradition", Kriya Yoga Publications, Quebec, Canada, 1991, details Agathiyar's journey as starting at Agastya Ashram near Nasik (Pancavati in ancient times), married King Vidarbha’s daughter Lobhamudra, (mentioned in the Mahabharata), and meet up with Rama. Then his pilgrimage takes him south where he has a residence at Malakuta near Badami (ancient Vatapi Puram or Dakshina Kasi) in the northern part of present-day Karnataka. He then comes further south to the Pothigai Hills. He moves on to the Indonesian islands, the islands of Borneo, and takes up residence in Maha Malaya hill in Malaya Dvipa. He enters Siam (present-day Thailand) and Cambodia where he marries Yasomadhi. They beget a young prince named Yasovarma. Agathiyar is reported to be living until the present day at Courtalam.

Pon. Govindaswamy in his book, "Sirsabaiyum Porsabaiyum", Bharath Book Bureau, 1985, mentions that Agathiyar took birth as Valluvar and gave us the "Tirukural" besides other texts. He mentions that Agathiyar took birth as Ramalinga Adigal in the 19th century and gave us the "Tiruarutpa". 

When the south tip had raised after all the Gods and Goddesses, Devas and Devis, Siddhas, Rishis, Munis, and many more deities and divinities gathered at Kailash to witness Lord Shiva's marriage to Goddess Parvathi, Agathiyar was sent to the south to bring about a balance. Pon. Govindaswamy in his book, "Vallalarum Bramagnana Sangamum", Bharath Book Bureau, calls this event where the earth tilted a Mystical Occult Event. This event is mentioned by Tirumular in his Tirumanthiram.

There you have it, the many stories and versions of the origin and travels of Agathiyar according to ancient scrolls, masters, and scholars. Then when curiosity took hold of us and we wanted to know from the horse's mouth, Suren placed the question of Agathiyar's origin before the grandmaster himself in 2017. Agathiyar replied in the Nadi. The story goes as follows.

Agathiyar in his very first mortal birth, had the vision of Kailash at a very young age of 10. After having the vision, he took up extreme tapas (tavam) including breath control. With the holy feet of the Sadguru forever in his thought, he reached a state of Nirmala at Kailash. 

Upon receiving theecha from Lord Kailai Shiva, he was blessed to be born a Siddha. It was a mystical birth. Agathiyar adds that it was not necessary to dwell into the source and the details (Rishimulam Nadhimulam).

Born as a Siddha now and moving in the jungles, sustaining only on fruits, his thoughts were fixed on Erai. He soon had the vision and grace of Goddess Vana Kali. 

Continuing with his seeking and search for realization and further severe tavam, in Pothigai, Agathiyar came to know about the medicinal benefits of various herbs and plants. Lord Kailai Shiva showed himself in a vision and conferred on him the names Gurumuni, Kudamuni, and Kumbamuni. Though he had merged with Erai, Agathiyar stayed on at Pothigai upon Lord Kailai Shiva's directive. Time went by as Agathiyar went without food, remained in silence, stayed in the state of Vasi, adhered to the eight limbs of Ashtanga Yoga, and performed extreme tapas for the rest of the Yuga. He gained the Siddhi to travel through the air. Having achieved so much, yet Lord Kailai Shiva told Agathiyar that there was something that he had failed to accomplish and do. When Agathiyar asked for further clarification, Lord Kailai Shiva laugh and looked him in the eye, and said, "Although you are an embodiment of Jnana, and those who hold on to your feet shall never face any disappointments, Gurumuni you do not have a companion as I do." Agathiyar was taken aback. He came to know that the Lord intended to get him engaged to the very representation of Mother Kaveri, and Kaberan's daughter, Lobamutrai. Hence in this Kali Yuga, his energy that was of Shiv Sakthi came to reside at Kalyana Theertam with the intention of blessing all those who saw him and Lobha Ma as a personification of Shiv Sakthi.

All these remind me of Dr. Bhani's speech at a local affiliate of Kallar Ashram. He mentioned a song by Avvai that had three different meanings to three different levels of people at three different periods in life. He shared how a song in praise of Lord Ganapathy that was an expression of love for the deity became a song laced with names of components to make a herbal Siddha concoction when read and understood by a Siddha practitioner. When the Dr. stepped onto the path of Jnana it took on a new meaning. His guru Yogi Ramaiah told him that it was entirely dealing with Jnana. 

Similarly, S. Janarthanan in his book "Dhyana Yogam", published by Arulmigu Amman Pathipakkam, Chennai, 1990 mentions the Vinayagar Agaval composed by Auvaiyar as both a song of praise and a song on yoga. 

The Tamil Guardian posts at https://www.tamilguardian.com/content/introduction-auvaiyar%E2%80%99s-vinayagar-agaval, carried the following piece that runs parallel to Dr. Bhani's experience and Janarthanan's observation too.

"Auvaiyar’s poem is a many-layered experience of philosophical concepts brought to life via devotional poetry. It begins with contemplation of the external form of God ... The Vinayagar Agaval swiftly moves beyond the contemplation of the feet to the adoration of the face and body of God. Auvaiyar now moves away from the contemplation of external form and the material universe into her metaphysical journey. The poetess explains further her experience of the physical yoga tradition, which is first mentioned in the circa 3000-year-old Rig Veda texts. She refers to the energy centers of the body and energy rivers (“Nadis”) such as the Ida and Pingala. She talks of awakening the “Kundalini” energy source... achieved through meditation and physical yoga, signifying spiritual awakening....leading to immortality and miraculous powers."

We are introduced to these Siddhis,

"The term Siddhanta is also connected to the term “Siddhi”, meaning miraculous gifts and so Siddhanta is the discipline of awakening these gifts. Hence the eight modes are thought to be the eight Siddhis or miraculous powers gained through the awakening of the Kundalini as described in the Tirumantiram text dated circa 500 AD. Auvaiyar’s poem remains in essence devotional, born out of her experience of the divine."

In https://www.alchemywebsite.com/vinayaga.html, Layne Little too equates the song as above.

"At first glance, the work seems conservative enough; as it begins with the traditional contemplation of the god from foot to crown. But it promptly veers off into the domain of the mystic as she invokes Ganesha as the embodiment of Turiya. Turiya, or "the Sleepless Sleep" is a state of deep yogic trance, where the aspirant sleeps to the illusionary and transient realm of gross sense phenomena and wakes to the infinitude of the inner realm."

Avvai accredits her advancement to Lord Vinayar, having moved from Bhakti to Yogam and Gnanam.

Just as the piece from The Tamil Guardian noted that Auvaiyar throughout her Agaval considered wisdom, clarity, bliss, and eternal life all as gifts of God rather than that which is acquired or earned, in https://truthdiveblog.wordpress.com/category/culturereligion/, we learn that, "Avvaiyar assigned everything to the lord as if She has done nothing." 

"She (Avvai) proceeds to end the poem by coming back to Bakthi. This Bakthi is a total surrender since Avvaiyar dedicates each and every step she passes in yoga to Vinayagar."

Agathiyar too attained the highest state, that of becoming one with Erai through the grace of Lord Muruga. Continuing His(Story) we refer to Thavathiru Rengaraja Desigar's book, "Potrinal Unathu Vinai Agalum Appa", which explains further, the process through which Agathiyar attained the highest state, that of becoming one with Erai. I shall run through a translation of his writing, originally in Tamil, briefly. 

This state was granted to Agathiyar by his Guru Supramaniar (Lord Muruga) because Agathiyar had provided the space, shelter, and all comforts for Supramaniar to carry on with his penances (tapas) and austerities (tavam) in a past birth. Agathiyar was 60 years of age then when Supramaniar attained the body of Light through his tapas, thanks to Agathiyar looking after all of Supramaniar's needs. Supramaniar promised Agathiyar that they shall meet in a subsequent birth and that he shall return the favor. Agathiyar mentions that he learned the Siddha way from Supramaniar. Supramaniar granted Agathiyar the body of Light or Jhothi Nilai in a subsequent birth as an appreciation of Agathiyar's service rendered to him and for helping Supramaniar himself achieve his desire in attaining the Jhothi Nilai. In that birth, Agathiyar traveled in vain in search of his ideal guru. As foretold in the earlier birth, Agathiyar eventually met Supramaniar at Kodaikanal, where Supramaniar made him recall the past and as promised in return for all his services in the past birth, blessed Agathiyar and taught him secrets of attaining the state of Erai. This reminds us of how Mahavatar Babaji came for Lahiri Mahasaya to redeem him, showing him his past belongings to trigger his memory of his forgotten past. 

Agathiyar began by performing puja to Supramaniar. By way of devotion to Supramaniar he began to realize that he had had the greatest gift which was the human birth, which comes by very rarely. Through Supramaniar he came to know himself and the divinity that resided in the physical body. He understood the very Nature that brought him forth and resided within him. With Supramaniar's guidance and blessings, Agathiyar relished the ambrosia or nectar that came about through his tapas. This removed the seven veils to reveal the Jhothi in him, hence attaining the body of Light. With this came Bliss, Siddhis, and the state of Deathless-ness. Agathiyar attained the five nature or Tanmai of Erai namely Creation, Sustenance, Destruction, Veiling, and Showering Grace. Supramaniar granted Agathiyar the title Gurumuni and Kumbamuni and sent him off to spread the Siddha way extensively all over the globe, bringing many into his fold. All the Siddhas soon looked upon Agathiyar as their Guru. Later at the Tamil Sangam Agathiyar presented before the assembly of Gods and Goddesses, the Sages, Siddhas, Rishis, and Munis, the Five Tenets that defined man's purpose in taking birth.


This is my 21st year of worship to Agathiyar. It is not much to shout about given the number of years of their lives others have devoted to his worship. But it gives me tremendous joy in having him at my side these days. What started off as fear and devotion towards him turned into that of respect to the guru. That too took a turn as he brought on a father-son relationship and soon that of a friend and buddy. How was this possible?

I began to immediately worship Agathiyar and the Siddhas in my home when asked to do so in my very first Nadi reading in 2002. I only knew them by name then reciting from a small booklet passed on to me by the Nadi reader Senthilkumar and a picture that I received from Sivabalan who hosted the Nadi readings in his home which is the present-day Agathiyar Shelter. Since 2005 when Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal came into my life as a Siddha guru in physical form, traveling with him on the path of the Siddhas, I began to see Agathiyar from his perspective too. When I asked him the day I arrived at his Kallar Ashram, how Agathiyar came to him, he revealed that it was in the form of Jothi or as a Light. Just before leaving his ashram and heading back home, he revealed that Agathiyar was the very breath or Vaasi in us. Later over the years when a devotee went into a state of coma and survived,  Agathiyar told the devotee through a Nadi reading that he had saved the devotee by breathing into him. This reminds us of ‎Genesis 2:7-22 - "Then the LORD God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being."

When we stepped out of the famed Nattadreswar temple in the middle of the Kaveri River in 2013, Tavayogi turned to me and said that Agathiyar was (Lord) Siva. 

Agathiyar tells us that usually, they do not dwell on the origin and source of their birth, brushing it aside as unimportant to us. True, but it's often the curiosity in us and the thirst to know, that prompts us for answers to life's mysteries. As I answered my cousin, who knew I was into the worship of Agathiyar and the Siddhas, asked me for confirmation on several stories about Agathiyar that he knew, I replied that it is of no importance to me as I know he is with us, guiding us and caring for us. We feel his presence often and he has worked out miracles in our lives. That is sufficient for now. In recent years as Agathiyar began to come to us through his devotees, he revealed that he was the Prapanjam and was the very vibration in all things. Indeed this strong energy and its vibration has been traversing through me continuously since this morning. Aum Agatheesaya Namaha.

Thursday 22 June 2023

TELLING OUR OWN STORY

Is god for real or a figment of our imagination? If someone were to ask me if I had seen Agathiyar what would I say? 

Though he has shown an Australian of Chinese origin and Gnana Jothiamma of his presence as a vision either standing tall till the ceiling height of my prayer room to the former or coming out of the room and walking by in the dead of the night to the latter, neither me nor my family has seen these miracles. Neither has Agathiyar whom we know as depicted come in my dreams.

So how can I say for sure that he is there? Why I am holding on to something that I have not seen nor touched, holding on to someone who is not in flesh and blood? I have no answers. The truth is that though he has not appeared in such form that he has been depicted in paintings and statues, I have seen his presence either coming through his Nadi as words of revelations, as speech coming through other individuals, as an energy both in me and others, as the breath and as the vibration in us. Today true to his words he comes as the Prapanjam touching the very core of our beings. If during our family visit to Doddabetta in Ooty in 2013, we were chilled to the bone as the cold wind blew, these days his very presence does the same. The top of the head or crown to be precise is chilled and cold and swirls. The sensation of a rod being pushed in is pretty obvious at times. As I look for answers to this phenomenon taking place, http://www.ramalinga.com sort of gives a possible hint.

"These great saints saw a Column of Light rising above the Sahasrara up to the Divinity, ... one must make an effort to ascend to the Divinity, ...... on having been settled in the Column of Light one does not need to continue doing this effort, but from this time the Divinity descends on oneself. The one in whom the Column of Light is settled enjoys the continual experience of the Divinity, who, on having descended, resides in one's own Heart (as shining Sun) and fills with Himself the whole Being gradually, even the physical body (which, cell by cell, is completely transmuted up to becoming divine). At first, the above-mentioned experience has not the same intensity all the time. Moved by His great Compassion, God takes the maximum care of the possible aftereffect in the physical body and that's why He is alternating the intensity to manifest Himself as Divine Light. Sometimes His resplendence is very soft whereas on other occasions It becomes the most intense, seeming that one is going to be melted in It. This experience of God fills the Self with Divine Love and Compassion, which overflow from the Heart like a river flowing endlessly toward other beings. Little by little, God is increasing by degrees the intensity of Light and one is becoming accustomed to it until the time comes when God manifests Himself wholly. Then the Column of Light shines from beginning to end with Its entire splendor. It isn’t visible, except on very rare occasions."

If we took food to appease hunger in the past, this very food gives extreme joy when consumed now. It goes beyond the taste buds to the very core of the cells. If having the food placed before us itself was fulfilling in the past, these days the invitation to have lunch or dinner itself brings on vibes and energy. The essence of the food is imbibed instantaneously. I guess this answers both my two-year and six-year-old granddaughters' question if god ate the food, served when they prepared food with their mother to offer to the gods recently. Similarly, I ask myself when I bathe Agathiyar each evening with water that has been kept outdoors in the sun, why am I drenched in coldness too.

The hearing too has deepened. I have become sensitive to the slightest sound. Every sound is amplified. I have begun to hear beyond closed doors, windows and walls which is quite disturbing too.

There was a moment back in time when I used to have a sudden fear come over me in the middle of the night that woke me up from sleep. Nothing I do helps to avert the fear. Finally, I go looking for my wife. Only when she places her arms around me will the fear subside and I can go back to sleep.

Much of what took place earlier has been shared in detail in my earlier postings including at http://agathiyarvanam.blogspot.com/2023/03/kundalini.html?m=1

Agathiyar told me that there was nothing to do henceforth when I asked him earlier if there were any further practices to be adopted when he spoke about the changes and the state I was in. He referred me to Tavayogi asking if he did anything. From actively searching for answers to life's mysteries he sent me into hibernation for some 14 years. Having shed all means to understand the unfathomable he filled me up with new-found activities and knowledge of his picking and choice after his calling through the Nadi in 2002. In 2019 he brought an end to all these activities and knowledge too and brought us to experience the results and reap the benefits of the years of patronage of him and his ways.

If in the past, as the Siddhas hid it as paripasai in their songs, life's mysteries were indeed a well-kept secret and heads of missions and gurus too kept it a closely guarded secret only shared to deserving students, after the coming of Ramalinga Adigal it all came out into the open. The saint tells us that even the commoner could achieve unknown and previously unreachable heights through devotion and compassion. Agathiyar too in asking me to write about the changes taking place in me, what I would consider as measly and minute, in comparison to the many stories I read and hear, wants me to share with readers of this blog the possibilities out there on this journey of homecoming. 

Elsewhere stories are told of saints and their conversations with god, not in their dreams, but in real-time. For instance, we read about Abhiramipattar whose devotion moved and made the Goddess Goddess Sri Abhirami alter the course of the events in a mysterious manner. It was the Tamil month of Thai, an Ammavasai night, or the night when the moon is not visible when King Sarobhoji, ruler of the kingdom of Tanjai on returning from Kaveripumpattinam stopped over at Thirukadavur to have a darshan of Lord Sri Amudhakadaysar and Goddess Sri Abhirami. Abhiramipattar was lost in deep meditation at the temple then. The king who noticed the devotion of Abhiramipattar inquired about him from the locals. They briefed the king about Abhiramipattar. The king entered the inner sanctum to offer his prayers. But the king could not bring himself to focus on his prayers as the image of Abhiramipattar stood in front of him. The king came out to the temple grounds and stood before Abhiramipattar. Wanting to test him, the king asked what was the tithi that day, knowing pretty well that it was Ammavasai. Abhiramipattar who was engrossed in the beauty of the Goddess shared what he saw. "A full moon" he replied. The king believed that Abhiramipattar was a lunatic just as the villagers saw him. He left the premises. Upon coming out of his tapas Abhiramipattar was informed of what had transpired earlier. Abhiramipattar regretted having lied to the king while in deep meditation. He believed this incident proved that indeed he was a lunatic in the eyes of the king and his subjects. He dug up a large pit and set a fire going. He hung precariously over the fire on a platform held by ropes. He prayed that the goddess should clear his name or he shall die in the flames. Abhiramipattar began singing the first verse of what was to become the Abhirami Andhathi, "உதிக்கின்ற". As he completed each verse he cut into the ropes that held him afloat. When he sang the 79th verse, "விழிக்கே", the Goddess appeared before him. She let afloat her Tadangam or earring into the sky. To everyone's amazement, it took the shape of a full moon. She spoke, "What you unknowingly uttered I have made materialize. Complete the Andhathi." Thus continued Abhiramipattar with "கூட்டிய வா". Abhiramipattar sang another twenty verses to complete the Abhirami Andhathi. The king and the locals realized that they had misjudged Abhiramipattar and asked for forgiveness. This story is based on his life story as written in The Little Flower Company's publication of the Sri Abhirami Andhathi in Tamil. 


Another story is told of yet another saint from Tanjai, Nandanar who was obsessed with going to Chidambaram. When others ask him when he would visit Chidambaram, he would reply "Naalai" or tomorrow. Hence Thiru Naalai Pohvaar became his name in later years when he was seen as a saint. Giving in to his persistence one day his landlord commanded him to till the 40 acres of land before he was allowed to visit the Lord at Chidambaram the next day. How is that possible Nandanar asked of his master who never had the intention to see him go. In the movie of the same name, Nandanar is shown falling to the ground, weeping, and thinking over the impossible task imposed on him. Upon waking up he is surprised to see the feat done and what's more ready for harvest. He was granted permission to visit Chidambaram finally. Arriving at the temple he hesitated to enter it. Three days passed by. He had a dream where the Lord instructs him to walk over fire and at the same time the temple priests dream of his arrival. He was paraded through the streets and eventually vanished into the inner chamber. 



How is it that inherent laws of nature are bent and logic is defeated in the case of saints? Is it the degree of devotion that they carry that breaks these rules? We do not have the answers. To answer them would shut the doors to other possibilities. That would become the norm and accepted truth henceforth. I guess that is the reason the Siddhas do not reveal much. Instead, they want us to experience. Only our own experience carries weight for we have been there, touched it, and came out unscathed and alive to tell the story. We have shared some of these miracles in the numerous posts of this blog for your perusal. This blog in fact is a telling of our stories.