Wednesday 8 May 2024

BURNING MY FINGERS

When Anita Moorjani speaks about her unfinished purpose coming here that was linked to her husband and that she was required to come back after being in a coma, I recall Agathiyar in a Nadi reading telling my wife and me that we came together again in this birth because our daughter who was also with us in a past birth in Papanasam, South India, had wished for us to be with her again. Just like the division in cells, from a single cell, we came to be a fully grown individual, we are all indeed connected as souls, arising from the one or Yegan or ParamAtma. 

In "The Little Soul and the Sun" by Neale Donald Walsch, published by Hampton Roads Publishing Company, 1998, a Little Soul told God, "I want to feel what it is like to be the Light." 

God tells him, "There is no easy way for you to experience yourself as who you are since there is nothing that you are not. In order to experience anything at all, the exact opposite of it will appear" and he went on to explain the opposites of things. "Since you cannot see yourself as the Light when you are in the Light, we'll surround you with darkness" he continued. Giving him a list of ways he could be special and having the Little Soul add to it, the Little Soul chooses the part where he gets to forgive, saying it wants to experience it for itself. God grants the Little Soul's wish. A Friendly Soul then steps in to help the Little Soul realize the experience. When asked why it volunteered the Friendly Soul tells the Little Soul "Don't you remember? Oh, we have danced together, you and me many times. Through the eons and across all the ages have danced. Across all the time and in many places have we played together. You just don't remember. We have both been through all of it. We have been the male and female, the good and the bad, we have both been the victim and the villain of it. Thus we have come together, you and me many times before, each bringing to the other the exact and perfect opportunity to express and to experience who we really are." But the Friendly Soul tells the Little Soul that in having to do that unkind thing it would have to slow down its vibration and become very heavy. "I will come into your next lifetime and be the bad one this time. I will do something really terrible and then you can experience yourself as the one who forgives." We are here to help each other fulfill their wishes and that of others. We are here to learn from each other experiences besides gaining direct experiences. 

Agathiyar who told me that we had known each other for crores of years came into my life and charted my path again in this birth. When he came around asking each of us what we wanted, while some asked for their troubles and illnesses and of their dear ones to go away, and others asked for Siddhi and Mukti without having any notion of what it was except having heard and read about these states, he then turned to me and waited for my reply. Though I had nothing to ask of him, I was forced to a corner to ask something. Finally, thinking continued service to him would be a proper thing to ask, I told him that I would want to take many more births and serve him as I did now. He asked me if that was what I wanted which echoed Tavayogi's answers to my asking to see Agathiyar and Ramalinga Adigal in the past. I knew then that it was not the ultimate wish and definitely not what he wanted to hear from me. I kept quiet. He moved on. Later having a conversation with Mahindren about this over the phone and remembering Tavayogi remind us not to stagnate in devotion or Bakthi and seek Gnanam, I told him maybe I should have asked for Gnanam. Agathiyar eavesdrops on our conversation and tells me that I had wished for Gnanam when he came later. He replied that Gnanam was not gifted but that we have to now make the internal journey traversing the various chakras and gaining all the experiences that come with the transformations and changes. Just as Tavayogi took me literally and physically walking the path of the Siddhas taking me to their abodes in the jungles and caves, giving me mantras to chant, rituals to carry out, and Yoga practices, rather than have me sit and gain bookish knowledge, Agathiyar too wanted me to have these experiences first before he came to clarify Gnanam. 

When I went for my Nadi reading in the beginning years Agathiyar told me to drop my guilt and forgive myself for the wrongs I had done as it was his play too. He said that he wanted me to have these experiences too. 

When he and Lord Muruga kept bugging me to build a temple for them and I refused to budge, finally Agathiyar tells me that it was all their play. 

When Agathiyar brought strangers into my home and asked me to loan my home and my body for him to carry out his play, we saw him do healing and bring solace and peace to these lost souls.

When Lord Murugan asked me to give way and stand aside so that he could carry out his play, all heaven broke loose. When Agathiyar lost his cool, Lord Murugan had him calm down and took over from there.

When the time was right for me to know about Maya and the extent of its arms in all matters of creation, Agathiyar staged his divine play or Lila. Lord Muruga told me to be aware of Lord Siva's and Agathiyar's play who had Indran play the game of chess using me as bait, and in the midst of this chaos, have Ramalinga Adigal come and calm and hush me, telling me to just watch their divine play, it was pretty obvious that it was to give us the experiences and bring us to see the role of Maya in all of God's creation. Agathiyar later came to shed some light on it. As usual, he gave me the experiences first and the clarity later. The Divine has shown his 5 fold acts namely that of creation, sustenance, eradication, veiling, and finally showering his grace. It is not only us who are schooled here. If we came to school here it is said that Ramalinga Adigal built the Satya Gnana Sabai to school the Devas too. 

As Agathiyar said, "The sacred book that shall show you the way, can only be written by you and only you, your experiences penned in ink. "உனக்கு வழி காட்டும் புனிதநூல் உன்னால் மட்டுமே எழுதப்பட முடியும். அது உன்னுடைய அனுபவங்களைக் கொண்டுதான் எழுதப்பட வேண்டும்", Agathiyar like God who told the Little Soul wants us to experience life and return back to him. The poet Kannadhasan says it beautifully too. To understand every factor of life one has to live it out.

What comes out of life, I asked. Live it he (God) said.

What does reading teach, I asked. Read and you shall know he said.

What is knowledge I asked. Experience it and you shall know he said.

What is love I asked. Give it and you shall know he said.

What is love I asked. Share it and you shall know he said.

What are the pleasures in a relationship, I asked. Wed her and you shall know he said.

What is a child I asked. Give birth and you shall know he said.

What is old age I asked. Live it and you shall know he said.

What is poverty I asked. Live it and you shall know he said.

What comes after death I asked. Die and you shall know he said.

Then I asked him if it was all to be experienced, why do I need you? 

God took a step forward and whispered, "I am these experiences."

Phew! What a journey it has been. If many learn the hard way, I am grateful to him for I only burnt my fingers to come to a state of realization.