AGATHIYAR AND LOBAMA'S WEDDING

What a memorable day it has been today. It all started with Sankar Aiya messaging me that he would be conducting the wedding for Agathiyar and Lobama today. (Refer last post). I then thought if I should do it for Agathiyar too as he is with Lobama at AVM since last year. After ending his spree visiting the homes of several of his devotees, he had picked up Lobama or rather entered the hearts of a devotee couple and moved them to purchase a bronze statue of Lobama to keep him company. If Bhogar surprised us coming through a devotee, and performing the homam back then whence the host decided to conduct a puja, today Bhogar came again and went on further to conduct Agathiyar's wedding. Words cannot describe those moments. One needs to be present. We wonder what shall take place tomorrow as we celebrate Agathiyar's annual puja celebration.

AGATHIYAR - LOBAMA'S WEDDING

If Tavayogi introduced me to carrying out the Homam, a smaller version of the Yagam in my home to commemorate the annual Jayanthi celebrations simultaneously while he carried it out in his Kallar ashram grounds beginning in 2004, Agathiyar came in a Nadi reading later to specify the exact time of his birth. That's 27 1/2 Naaligai into the Ahilyam star. Since then, I have adjusted the timings of my home puja or prayers accordingly. Then after some years, in 2018 he switched the Jayanthi celebrations for us at Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) to Thai Pusam Day. Since then, I have adjusted the timings of my home puja or prayers accordingly again. As we look forward to carrying it out on Tuesday, 11 February, Sankar Aiya from the Agathiyar Sannadhi at the Adi Kumbeswarar Temple, Kumbakonam threw in a surprise message a couple of days ago. He tells me that he will be conducting the wedding for Agathiyar and Lobama at Sri Akilandeswari Ambal Sametha Sri Agastheeswarar Temple in Karuvalarcheri Road, Kumbakonama a day earlier on 10 February. That very instant I asked myself if I should carry out the wedding ceremony at AVM too since Agathiyar has been joined by Lobama. 

I had posted news of the wedding taking place at the home of a couple who had hosted Agathiyar last year and decided to get him a bride in bronze too at https://agathiyarvanam.blogspot.com/2024/01/agathiyar-lobama-wedding.html and https://agathiyarvanam.blogspot.com/2024/01/the-big-day.html

I asked myself since he had carried out my 60th wedding last Guru Purnima, should I not carry out his wedding celebration too? Wanting to enquire further, speaking to Sankar Aiya he surprised me by asking the same. It brought tears to my eyes. I took it as Agathiyar's wish and proceeded to make arrangements to carry out his wedding. 

We came to know from Agathiyar in a Nadi reading for us some years back, that after engaging in years of Tapas and austerities, and having accomplished them sucessfully arriving at the state of a Siddha, as Agathiyar stood before Lord Siva thinking that he had completed all of Lord Siva's asking, the Lord smiled and told him that there was one last outstanding task and experience he had to gain. Lord Siva told him that he was to marry and found him a life partner too. 

Coming to present times, Sankar Aiya tells me that Agathiyar, just as he had revealed the exact time of his birth to me in my Nadi reding, in a Nadi reading for a devotee some 12 years back, revealed that his marriaged was solemized during Punar Poosam at the above temple before Lord Siva. Hence we now know both the story and reason behind Agathiyar's wedding being held there. 

IN THE HOURS OF SILENCE

ABOUT STORIES

AGATHIYAR PUJA

Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) that was the hub of action in its heyday is now as silent as a pin drop. Though it was the hub for all to gather to conduct puja and execute charity back then, all that prevails these days is silence. Meanwhile, Agathiyar is seeing to the fulfillment of all my desires and wants that I dropped, shelved, or forgotten. Ramalinga Adigal told me once that in letting go, the Prapanjam shall provide for us all our needs. Indeed my neighbor comes by bringing me food to sustain these days of solitary and silence that I was asked to observe. I am never left hungry. I guess the whole idea of having me go into solitary is just as we need a break from work, we need a break from puja, doing charity, and from people and the various vibes. Agathiyar has brought me to the ultimate teaching, that of silence, that was adopted both by Lord Dhakshanamurthy and Bhagawan Ramana.

Though Agathiyar has me stay in solitary there seems no end to the constant stream of thoughts that comes on. Although we are told not to focus on them or follow these thoughts, the stream and flow never ends. We can only watch our thoughts and do nothing to bring a stop to them. But what if there is no thought at all? What would it be like? It is indeed scary to imagine this state, the state of thoughtless state. This phase is to forget the body and know the self. The medium that ties up both is the breath or Uyir. Settling in the breath makes us forget the body and connect with the Self or Atma instead. This is the moment of Atma Darisanam. The Mother that is the breath or Uyir introduces us, the JeevAtma to the Father or ParamAtma. This journey is beautifully depicted in words by Ramalinga Adigal in the song "Aanipon Ambalathil".

Although he had me stay indoors and tend only to my family's needs, Agathiyar came through an invitation to conduct a puja in another state days ago. The host approached us through a relative of theirs who frequented our home puja. The former had been carrying out this annual puja for the past 23 years bringing in someone from an Ashram to conduct the prayers. This time around Agathiyar wanted to break their dependancy on another and instead set the stage for them to conduct the puja themselves in the years to come. Hence I saw myself with Mahindren's family arrive at 6.20pm. The puja was scheduled to start at 7pm. But Agathiyar came much earlier at 6.40. In fact, he was traveling with us, as we came to know later. He told the host that though he had come much earlier there was no reason for them to change their plans. Seeing him arrive I told the host to begin their home puja, what and how they would do daily at their altar, and continue with the day's special puja. I was surprised that they were rather lost on how to begin and looking at each other for a cue. Someone in the crowd then began a prayer for Lord Vinayagar. This was then followed by silence with each looking to the other for direction. Then someone started the ball rolling reciting the names of the Siddhas. It was obvious that these names were alien to those who gathered for Agathiyar called me over and asked that they stop reciting. He told me that the Arutperunjothi mantra would be a fine start and would blend well with those gathered as it was a simple chant to follow. I led the chant. He told those gathered to chant it from the navel and not just merely move their lips. After some time chanting the mantra, he then blessed all those gathered and addressed some. He told the host not to depend on a third party but to carry out the puja themselves. We understand that they never learned the trade by inviting another to conduct the puja. We tend to appreciate Tavayogi now for he had me carry out a smaller scale of the Yagam to coincide with his Agathiyar's Jayanthi back then. He came around later to fine-tune the rituals. We then picked it up and brought the Siddha puja into other's homes. We brought it into the corridors of the temples too. When I stood before Agathiyar finally I thanked him for being there with us. He replied that this was the reason "we" had to come. This surprised me. He did not say that he had come to bring the change but included me and Mahindren's family and the devotee who was a conduit to pass on the invitation from the host to me. So I had to break my moment of solitary and go over to attend the puja. 

Agathiyar had told me back then when he stopped all forms of puja and charity that whatever happened never to stop conducting his annual Jayanthi puja. Initially, this puja at AVM coincided with that of the parent ashram in Kallar and several other venues. But over time Agathiyar switched the date for us to coincide with Thaipusam. We shall be celebrating his Jayanthi on Tuesday 11 February 2025 between 12 noon and 1pm. 

Living Alone

SILENCE: BE AS YOU ARE - RAMANA MAHARSHI

LEAVING THE DARK WOODS BEHIND

I had written in several earlier posts that "one now walks the dark alley where unknown fears step before us. It has yet to be given a face and a tag. But it is felt and known. Eventually, I believe one shall leave this dark woods and arrive into the light". This phase has never been spoken about. If all the other phases of Sariyai, Kriyai, and Yogam have guidelines, methods, discipline, ways, techniques, and practices given by those who have trodden the path before, here in this final lap it is one of self-discovery of one's self, facing the soul and all that it carried since its parting from the source or Param to become an individual soul or Jeeva that carried desires to know and learn the mysteries of creation.

The unfounded fear has left. I have regained my sleep. I am at peace with myself and all around me. I am simply existing. Nothing to look forward to. No further step to take. I am where I am supposed to be. No further accumulation of either wealth or knowledge. No further reading. As I told a friend and reader, I would have myself learn from experience and live by example, in that way, I only take what is applicable for that moment in time and place. I'm happy with this. 

Just as there are many snares laid out in the material world, there are many mines laid out in the spiritual field too. One has to walk with caution. But if we were to step on it take it as a learning experience and move ahead. We were meant to learn from this experience too.

To a parent, Agathiyar implied that the freak accident his daughter had was not an act of karma but carelessness on his part. Many of our troubles are of our making. Not heeding sound advice from the Siddhas or not carrying them out as and when directed, then we find ourselves sailing the troubled waters.

If initially we are told that Karma shackles us, and are given ways in the form of pilgrimages, prayers, and remedies as the keys to open the lock, later we find ourselves caught in it willingly, not able to tear away from its claws. We become slaves to Karma. It is only with total surrender that we can escape from its grips.

Understanding God through music

UNFOUNDED FEAR 6

This is the phase where sexual urges come on, anger flares and fear arises. Hence all the more reason to stay in solitude and address and win over these temptations and emotions. Just to help us further, we are momentarily removed from family and society. So the need to go into isolation. What awaits after this phase is anyone's guess. But one thing is pretty obvious that is that Agathiyar has been very patient and accommodating with me, giving me the freedom to still make choices although I have surrendered to him. But what is surrender when we still have this "I" thought and identification with ourselves? Only when we lose this will we become another, in this case, him. He wants us to lose ourselves and merge into him. In doing thus, we are one with all too. We lose our individual identity and self. We breathe, see, taste, and touch through him and vice-versa. This is where he is bringing us, to Ramana's teachings as he says. Since he spoke yesterday the fears have subsided. I am clear in my thoughts that were muddied and disturbed earlier. The fear is being replaced by joy and bliss, calm and connectivity.

UNFOUNDED FEAR 5

Agathiyar did come a moment ago through a telephone conversation and asked me how my state of isolation was going and if it was blissful. He told me to keep to myself and maintain the current state of solitude referring to Bhagawan Ramana's state. So it is pretty obvious that the momentary separation and distancing from family and friends was all his doing so as to provide me the space to be with my thoughts and my fears. 

UNFOUNDED FEAR 4

In these moments of silence, what is audible and loud is the breath. And believe me, it is frightening. Is this the transition to that of a body of Pranava Deham? Having brought us to the Sudha Degam from the impure Asudha Degam, is this then a step towards the Pranava Deham? 

Swami Saravanananda in this book, an English translation of Ramalinga Adigal’s "Aruperunjhoti Agaval" published by Ramalinga Mission, Madras, writes,

At whatever age the aspirant gains illumination or the effulgence enters in him or emanates from within, some remarkable changes take place in the body-frame. The Divine Light seems to change the very cell of the body, with the result, that they seem to function in the opposite direction. Consequently, the old body becomes middle aged, then to youth of eighteen years, to twelve years (pure body), to eight years and finally five years (Pranava body). The transformation of perfect body (Sudha deham) into the body of grace and light (Pranava deham). The body of grace (Pranava deham) according to him can be seen visually but it cannot be touched. It appears to be a heavenly child of about five to eight years of age. After five years the body grows to the size of the universe to become casual body or a body of gnosis (Gnana deham) which is the natural abode of the soul.

With the descent of sufficient Divine Light the psychic head begins to emerge. According to Vallalar, this psychic head (a crown or diadem of light) is made up of a special and highly refined type of brain called Omkar brain. As soon as it emerges, it draws more cosmic light; the more the light the greater the growth of the psychic head.

With the advent of psychic head, more and more changes take place in the already purified body. The cells and thence the whole body begins to transcend the limits imposed on them by impure Maya (the grosser principle of nature) and try to break one more of its veils. The cells undergo alternate condensation and expansion for an unspecified period and the body slowly emerges out of its bondage and begins to grow. This expanding and ever prospering body, is called the subtle body or the body of Omkar or Pranava body.

The transformation of the Pranava body into a Gnostic body begins with the functioning of the third eye. With the functioning of the third eye, the transformation of the Pranava body is completed and the next and final stage of transformation into the Gnostic body (Gnana deham), the ultimate and greatest transformation in human evolution starts: a transmutation into the Godhead, which he referred to as merging with the body of supreme wisdom - the body of God supreme (Gnana deham).

The body of love or Sudha Deham or Anbu Uru gives the experience, Uyir Anubhavam; while the body of grace or Pranava Deham or Arul Uru gives the Arul Anubhavam and finally the body of bliss or Gnana Deham or Inba Uru gives the Siva Anubhavam. 

As the divine light descends into the sheath of energy (Pranayama Kosham) the entity becomes a Siddha in the truest sense of the word. As defined in the Upanishads, a Siddha is one who has progressed from the exalted ‘state of freed while living’ (Jivanmukta) to ‘supremely free with full power over death’ (Paramukta). This state is referred to in Siddhantha literature as Soruba Mukti or Soruba Samadhi. 

Agathiyar has to come and tell me if I am heading there or if it is all a fantasy of the mind.

 

UNFOUNDED FEAR 3

Just as the pain that I endured in my lower back, back in those days for some 2 1/2 years woke me up from my sleep, the unfounded fear that I am having these days, woke me up some moments ago from my sleep. Nothing I did to bring calm over me worked. I am wide awake. It is now 1.46am. I decided to write this post. Going by what has been taking place since the day I traveled this path, I realize that I was being prepared for something that I cannot exactly pinpoint as yet. All I have is guesses. Just as the many songs of the Siddhas and saints and all that Tavayogi told in passing and Agathiyar came to reveal make sense only now, I guess I have to go back to their writings and songs to understand what is taking place in me. After having me come to the path and carry out puja through a Nadi reading in 2002, after having me carry out puja and charity with others beginning in 2013, after bringing the shutters down on all these activities in 2019, after having confined me to his prayer room and observing several practices, I had a similar fear come on three instances. Nothing I did alienate the fear. It only settled after I entered our bedroom and hugged my wife. There were instances where I would have Agathiyar (his statue) sit with me and keep me company when no one was around. This time around I am alone again as Agathiyar executed a plan to have my wife stay away for several months caring for her aged parents. Who could I hug? I picked up the statue of Lobama and hugged her. Is this madness? I did ask Agathiyar if all this would lead to that state exactly. His reply was not comforting. My guru Supramania Swami was out in the streets almost naked at the height of his transformation into a Gnani. He would pick a handful of soil that would turn into sacred ash. Eventually, a lady (the divine) fed him a morsel of food that brought him to his senses. He returned to his family. Am I heading toward this state too? Only Agathiyar has the answers.

UNFOUNDED FEAR 2

After reading my last post, a friend and reader called me to enquire how I was faring. Just as during the times when I went through extreme pain in my lower back for some 2 1/2 years and the many instances where just like panic attacks the pain came on and where Agathiyar brushed it all aside telling me me that pain too was bliss, since a couple of days ago, there has been an underlying bliss felt underneath what Agathiyar calls an uncalled-for fear that arises from within and without. The fear left last night. I shall have to wait and see if it has left for good. The breath that was confined to the body is now merged in the Prapanjam. The three Dosas that troubled me, especially in the mornings and as I retire to bed have equalized, I suppose too. I guess it was a phase where I had to walk through the dark woods and eventually arrive in the open and under the bright sky.