In coming to us a couple of days back, Agathiyar told my wife and me that we were already "there". It wasn't the end of any physical or mystical journey or trail. Neither a transition into another land or planet, realm or dimension, but having arrived at a clear understanding of Lord Shiva's game or Leela or Lila in all of creation, sustainance and eradication. Looking back on the journey, I cannot help but question how it all happened. I never went on a search. I never did arduous austerities, Tavam or Tapas. Neither did I do strenuous practices and exercises. But the path magically lay before me, inviting me to it through a call from within to read Agathiyar's Nadi in 2002. I magically stepped before my very first guru, Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai, on the pretext of charting my daughter's horoscope upon a request from my wife as I boarded the cab to the airport for my maiden journey to India in 2003, to settle my past scores that had come to haunt me as my Karma. Swami passed me his entire life's savings, not monetary or assets, but worth beyond that. He gave me the merits of his 40 years of Tapas and Tavam that paved the way for me to attain all that Agathiyar had in store for me without any difficulty. I magically stepped before Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar Ashram when he visited Malaysia in 2005. He taught me to be humble; pointed me to carrying out charity, which brought on compassion within me to other beings, animals, and plants, in an otherwise dry and arid heart. Tavayogi showed me rituals that helped bridge both worlds, that of man and Siddhas, and paved the way for their arrival, and with their arrival, the entire pantheon of Gods and Goddesses into my humble family home that came to be known as Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM). Finally, Tavayogi, like Supramania Swami, left me a treasure chest of several selected Asanas and Pranayama in 2007 that shaped me into what I am today. These exercises awakened the dormant primordial creative energy Sakti, which, after orchestrating the sequence of my birth, from an embryo to fetus to a child, and though she lay dormant in the Muladhara, looked after the shaping of the body and its faculties well through my journey as a kid, a teen, an adult and till I reached my 66th year of physical existence as of today. My efforts as Tavayogi said were only until the energy reached Svadishthana. Agathiyar in 2024 came to tap and break the bund and free the energy that had stagnated. The Sakti rapidly cleared the way of obstacles, knots, and toxins, magically making her way, traveling its course to higher Chakras and finally reaching the ocean of bliss at the Sahasrara. Once there, she reached out to her home and place of birth in the higher regions of the cosmos, to be one with her beloved Shiva, dancing in ecstasy and bringing down the ambrosia in its most refined and pure form as renewed energy and together with it news from the higher domains, often allowing me to download its contents as and when required. It has been a journey of sheer amazement. I still ask myself if I deserve it.
