Much has been said about karma in this blog. I only came to know about karma after reading my Nadi for the very first time in 2002. Prior to that, I had kept away from all forms of worship and reading of spiritual and religious books for some 14 years after I did not receive answers to all my queries. I was confused after hearing all the stories and readings that painted a rosy picture that God was all compassionate, but in reality, it did not match with what took place. Only the opposite happened. Although I was spared, I was questioning why people suffered, even staunch devotees, sometimes at the very hands of God. But I still kept at continuing my temple and home worship. Lord Siva came to put a stop to all this questioning telling me to keep my questions to another date (in the future).
Coming to the Nadi and Agathiyar, I learned that we were answerable to our past deeds that take shape as karma. Hence I understood and accepted the fact that we and the others have made mistakes in the past and have to pay in the form of our sufferings. I too was sent to carry out numerous remedies or parikaram. I did a pilgrimage to India after completing them locally. I was asked to pray and worship, do charity and feed both man and animal. That was a means of cleansing my karma, I was told in the Nadi.
Agathiyar tells us that going through pain is a means of reducing them too. He tells us going through inconveniences and hardship was another way of reducing them. Hence we understand why certain temples were sited in remote areas and atop hills and in deep jungles. With this new understanding, we tend to accept the hardship, delays, and obstacles that devotees go through in traveling on pilgrimages to these places. It was a means to shed our karma. These were ways of reducing karma for one on the path of Sariyai.
Coming to Kriyai, learning to start a fire and reciting the names of the Siddhas, as did Tavayogi introduced us to, we learned from him that this was a way to end or at least reduce the effects of natural calamities brought on by Mother Earth and nature. Agathiyar came later to enlighten me that the homa that I was doing reluctantly was for the good of all of consciousness or prapanjam. Later Tavayogi tells us that this ritual will help heal our sufferings and ailments too. When Tavayogi took ill in 2017 we pleaded to Agathiyar to spare him. Agathiyar gathered the Siddhas to conduct a Yagam that is a Homa done on a larger scale with the intent to save his life. Tavayogi survived. Agathiyar tells me later that lighting this sacrificial fire does eradicate our karma to a certain degree too.
Moving into the next stage that of Yoga we are told that by the internal fire of our tapas or austerities or Tava Kanal that results from our practice of meditation our karma is burnt away further.
We understood that as we move up the spiritual ladder our karma is lessened in many ways given at the appropriate time at each stage of progress.
Having attained maturity in understanding and arriving at the state of satisfaction and acceptance, the move to Gnana is made where we are then given the bitter pill or truth to swallow. We are told that all the ways and means prescribed earlier do not contribute the least to ridding, eradicating, or lessening the hold of karma on us but had contributed immensely towards adding on to our existing bank balance of merits. We had to balance the scale. Dr. Krishnan, medical astrologer, and Siddha practitioner in running through my horoscope did explain how my life was spared or a danger put off in many instances. This was countered by the draining of my financial resources. I had to either lose money or lose my life.
We learn the truth that we still have to answer to our karma but with the divine now by our side, our load is lessened to a large extent. A couple who were devotees of Agathiyar shared how they have come to terms with their karma. Before the divine come to their aid, the load they carried on their shoulders was akin to carrying a bag of coins. Coins are heavy. When the divine stood by their side, the heavy load turned into paper money. It was a breeze and they could sail through the dilemma of life.
We now understand and have come to terms that the amount of karma accumulated never changes but its form could. Having such an enlightened view and perspective, karma however huge and heavy, sure does feel light and easy on our shoulders to carry. Thus we begin to understand why we still go through misery and suffering even after having done numerous remedies, and tend to accept responsibility for our sufferings.
In bringing us to do charity too, we were told that it would help loosen the hold of karma on us. But in actuality, it served to open our hearts and bring on compassion and love in us towards fellow man and animal.
On another note, we have been trained to please God all this while by showering him with money, gifts, garlands, milk, etc. This is seen in Sariyai. For those of us who have found a guru, he comes to shift our sight from pleasing God to serving him. This is seen in Kriyai. Slowly the guru shifts our sight to attain higher achievements working in tandem with us on our purpose and spiritual goal. This is seen in Yoga. With the dawn of divine wisdom that results from going within, the sadhaka drops the sheaths, he drops the method, he drops the path, and stands merged with God. This is the state of Gnana. If he chooses he comes back from his state to show others the way and the means too. He then is a Jeevanmukthan.
Coming to the path having served him, served his devotees, served his children, and having carried out rituals we became satisfied and contended. We never expected Agathiyar to offer us boons. But he did ask all those gathered and finally turned his attention to me. I had nothing to ask of him. I was satisfied and contended. But as he was waiting for a reply, I began to think fast. Finally, I thought that serving him as I did now would make him happy. I told him that I would love to take numerous births and serve him as I do now. He asked me if that was what I wanted? I remained silent knowing that this was not what was to be asked of him. I sincerely told him I do not know what to ask fearing that whatever I ask shall be wrong. He left it at that. Over the days I called Mahindren and shared my thoughts. I told him maybe we should be asking for Gnana as Tavayogi always laments that nobody comes seeking Gnana. When he came next I was taken aback and surprised when Agathiyar told me that I had asked for Gnana. He had eavesdropped on our telephone conversation. I knew this was the right thing to ask as he went on to explain the means and the way. I can easily relate this conversation with Agathiyar with the lyrics of the a beautiful song penned by Pa Vijay for the film "Mookutti Amman".
பார்த்தேனே உயிரின் வழியேயார் கண்ணும் காணா முகமே
கல் என்று நினைத்தேன் உனையே
நீ யார் என்று சொன்னாய் மனமே தான் நீயா
எதில் நீ இருந்தாய்
எங்கோ மறைந்தாய்
உன்னை தேடி அலைந்தேன் எனக்குள்ளே தெரிந்தாய்
இது போதும் எனக்கு வேறு வரங்கள் 100 வேண்டுமா
இறைவா இதுதான் நிறைவா
உணர்ந்தேன் உனையே உனையே
மறந்தேன் எனையே எனையே
வேதங்கள் மொத்தம் ஓதி
யாகங்கள் நித்தம் செய்து
பூசிக்கும் பக்தி அதிலும் உன்னைக் காணலாம்
பசி என்று தன்முன் வந்து
கை ஏந்தி கேட்கும் போது
தன் உணவைத் தந்தால் கூட உன்னைக் காணலாம்
உன்னைக் காண பல கோடி இங்கு வாரி இறைக்கிறார்கள்
எளிதாக உன்னைச் சேர இங்கு யாரு நினைக்கிறார்கள்
அலங்காரம் அதில் நீ இல்லை
அகங்காரம் மனதில் இல்லை
துளி கள்ளம் கபடம் கலந்திடாத அன்பில் இருக்கிறாய்
உணர்ந்தேன் உனையே உனையே
மறந்தேன் எனையே எனையே
அகம் நீ ஜகம் நீ
அணுவான உலகில் அகலம் நீ
எறும்பின் இதய ஒளி நீ
களிரின் துதிக்கை கனமும் நீ
ஆயிரம் கை உன்டென்றால் நீ ஒரு கை தர கூடாதா
2000 கண் கொண்டாய் உன் ஒரு கண் என்னை பாராதா
உன்னில் சரண் அடைந்தேன்
இனி நீ கதியே.
(Source: https://www.tharunshiv.com/paarthene-mookutthi-amman-song-lyrics-with-meaning/#tlyrics)