THE MATRIX

There is a reason we meet each other. It looks like it is for our collective upliftment. As Agathiyar spells out in his 5 tenets for mankind, foremost we are here to understand our purpose in taking birth. This is where we are trashed and run over by life's happenings that bring on experiences that begin to mold a new "Me". The search to know the reasons begins. We step into Sariyai and Kriyai. This eventually brings us to know the creator and the Self. Knowing the creator, or experiencing the subtle energies next, as in Yogam, we are to "thank the divine creator or energy that brought forth our birth through consultation with the lunar forefathers and their angelic hierarchies that co-exist with us down here." Here, though separated physically, we are seen to be connected with the source, the spiritual assembly and lineage of angels and forefathers, and our spiritual home. Next on line, we are to thank all the caretakers both seen and unseen, in the present and the past. These are the deities and ancestors who after their demise still look over our shoulders, parents and siblings, relatives, and the community. We begin to serve the community and society. Next comes a task that calls for unselfish service that is to "dutifully aid and help, the ongoing evolution of all co-existing human beings." With the experience gained and the state attained whereby we turn towards helping others in extending aid and help, as in charity besides seeing to the responsibilities that come with career and family, love and compassion comes within. The final task is to move towards aiding "the ongoing evolution of all co-existing beings and entities, existing upon the lower levels of the evolutionary ladder, dutifully supporting the manifested matrix or Prapanjam." We begin to guide others. We turn into becoming Upagurus and Gurus. (Summarized from Vashisht Vaid's post on his blog https://holysageagathiyar.com/ ) Now we begin to evolve together spiritually. 

When Supramania Swami put in forty years of work in his tavam and with the grace of the very divine and the gurus he worshiped and followed attained Gnana and stood as a Gnani amongst us, and when he asked me if I was carrying out my tavam, and seeing my hesitation in replying, replied that I wasn't and urged me to do it so that he could move up the hierarchy and at the same time he passed on the merits of his tavam to me, I was surprised and did not understand even a bit. Today Agathiyar tells me he is in their company. 

When certain quarters who were bent on ruining the name of holy men, questioned the end that Tavayogi faced before his samadhi, Dhanvantri came to us asking us to ignore what they have to say and consoled us telling us that indeed Tavayogi at attained the state of light. When he was warded and underwent an operation in 2017, the Siddhas gathered together to light a Yagam after hearing our pleas and prayers. They connected with the all-yielding Prapanjam and thus Tavayogi had an extension in life. He soon set about handing over the ashram to Mataji and its assets to the trustees. He went into samadhi the following year. Recently Agathiyar disclosed that my tavam had contributed towards Tavayogi attaining the state of Jothi. It pretty well seems like we are all connected in this phase of our journey. This is the ongoing evolution of all co-existing beings and entities in the evolutionary ladder, dutifully supporting the manifested matrix or Prapanjam that Agathiyar had explored and implored us to carry out in his 5 tenets for mankind.

Though we might think that we have solved something, we do not have all the answers. Even the Siddhas do not have all the answers. That is why some of their predictions do not materialize. Even they are evolving along with us. I guess even God doesn't have all the answers as there is an underlying law or Eternal Order or Dharma set into motion in the way past that still has some momentum left in it. When the energy exhaust itself all comes to a standstill.

COMING HOME 2

We have forgotten the reason we usher in the harvest festival Pongal. It has us throw away the junk that we have been collecting for years, at least once a year. It was good housekeeping then. So is it with this body. This body too undergoes changes daily. Those who have not seen us for a while would be likely to pass a comment on the way we look or how we have grown up or aged. The pains of growing old are felt by many. In the movie "Dev Bhoomi - Land of the Gods", a villager from the Himalayan mountains self-exiles himself after a mishap. He finds work employed in the kitchen of a Bangladeshi in England, first as a dishwasher and later as Chief Cook. Upon knowing that his eyesight was failing and the doctors cannot do much, he returns home to meet the anger of the surviving relatives and villagers who knew him. Wanting to part his savings with his sister but as she did not want it, he builds a school that was burned down. He loses his sight shortly. In another movie "Thandatti" an old woman is left to fend for herself. After her children drain her of her savings she is seen on the streets. It is sad to see the elderly become outcasts. On the other hand, many elderly chose to remain back in their homes and hometowns when their children move out for various reasons. Those who choose to change and accommodate the changes that tag along with time survive. When nature itself has accommodated the many changes why can't man? Why are we bent on keeping the old flame alive? 

Where are the days when they respected the wise and elderly? We grew up not as a child to our parents but to the entire community in the neighborhood. Others would look out for us. It was a good gesture on the part of society then, though at times it turned out to be detrimental to us. I got a spanking after a neighbor saw me sitting in the front row in the 35 cents class at a movie. She had reported the matter to my parents. I got a spanking for watching up close the movie. 

Watching the movie "Maaveeran" brought me to put my thinking cap on. A comic strip artist for a Tamil daily realizes that events from his story take place magically.  He is forewarned of events in real life by a voice that only he hears. This happens after hitting his head after he falls in a suicide attempt that goes wrong. He awakens to hearing this voice. In the climax scene, he asks the occupants of his apartment to leave as the voice tells him that it would collapse. When questioned as to who alerted about the disaster he points to the voice. People then turned around to return to their homes in disbelief. Who in his right mind is going to believe him? Any warning of a disaster has to come from the authorities. Is God an authority here? Would his word stand before the law and lawmakers and for the matter in the court of law? Would God stand in the dock? Would he come as a witness? If God was to appear we would reject him offhand. Man has made his life so sophisticated that he can't bring himself to see God in the simplest of things. 

This brought me to question if what was to happen is best kept a secret. It makes us think that it is even better when God does not narrate the happening in real-time as in the movie. It gives us the scare. On the other hand, if we are alerted we could take some action before tragedy strikes. 

As we are made up of stories accumulated in this birth and the stories from the many previous births, we are writing our own autobiographies. Though it is just that it is not published in book form, others read us and our every move in real-time. God might intervene in some people's lives provided they seek him out. Or he might have a need for us to take on his task in which case he comes knocking our doors. 

Do we want to leave behind an extraordinary story or one that is run-of-the-mill? When he tells his girlfriend that he was just an ordinary guy who cannot possibly fight injustice, she reminds him that though he was an ordinary guy but only he heard the voice, "But only you an ordinary man heard that voice, right?" She asked him if he ever wondered why? "Did you wonder why?" She continues that though many have written the story it was only he who took the approach to fight against injustice. "Many have drawn this comic before you. You were the first to draw about the warrior fighting the people." She saw his anger in fighting back and in seeking justice and changing things deep within him that came to the forefront through his comics. "There is an anger in you deep down to fight back and change everything. That anger is the stories you hear. The voice is your power" she concludes. As he fears his death, he tells her "My death is the climax of his stories." She tells him that "That is the climax of all our stories. But what you do before the climax is what counts. He could be anything God or magic, let him be anything, he wants to do good to the people through you. Until now I told you not to do this, but now I am telling you to try for once doing what he tells you to." This sounded like a message to me too. She answered the hesitation I had in taking the step adorning the role of a guru, that I had voiced out in the past several posts. 

As he had his old timidity and fear set in after the voice stopped speaking to him he tells her that "But he had already stopped telling the stories, how do I know what happens next?" She replies aptly, "Why? Arent you a storyteller too? Find out." He took things into his own hands henceforth. I guess Agathiyar would stop speaking once we take on the role too. Now I understand why Agathiyar pointed me to Tavayogi at every instance. He was a living role model. He was a living guru. Similarly, the expected Nadi reading that I had mentioned in an earlier post too I believe would not take place. I believe Agathiyar is telling us to believe in our capability and strength now after having guided us through his Nadi for years and later coming through his devotees. These were required for the seekers, students, and disciples but not for the guru. Now I understand why Tavayogi refused to read the Jeeva Nadi for himself that was in his possession. Just as there can be only one Captain on a ship and just as Guhai Namasivayar sent off his student Guru Namasivayar once he saw signs of a guru in his student, Agathiyar would step back and just watch. As it is he had Ramalinga Adigal link us to the Prapanjam earlier and telling us that now they stand as the Prapanjam too, to deal directly with it for all our needs. Now I understand why Tavayogi took up the lighting of the Yagam post-tsunami 2004 and had carried it out as an annual event. We understand how he told us that he would speak to "them" when after listening to our inability to gather on a weekday to carry out a Siddha puja in a faraway town as desired by Tavayogi's guru Chitramuthu Adigal and conveyed by Agathiyar in Tavayogi's Jeeva Nadi reading for a devotee at AVM. This is what Tavayogi in bringing me to the caves and jungles and in pointing me to the skies and the trees said that "they" were welcoming us, mentioning the breeze that blew and the aroma of sandalwood in the air and the invisible petals that were showered on us.

Just like the voice in the movie finally says "Mutrum", Agathiyar is most likely saying he is bringing an end to my housemanship.  

COMING HOME 1

A worm can only become a worm. A chick becomes a hen or a cock. A lizard stays a lizard. A cub becomes a lion or lioness. So goes with the other reptiles, insects, and animals. A butterfly starts its life as the egg, the larva or caterpillar, the pupa or chrysalis, and the adult butterfly. Man starts his journey as a  zygote, a blastocyst, an embryo, and a fetus and into a baby. It is said that we have taken numerous births taking on all the forms in creation before reaching the state of man. Among all these creations it is only man who can evolve and make his way up the cycle of evolution to reach a divine state. Hence the reason the saints state that this human birth is rare. And what are we doing with it? 

I too was going about life without a purpose, following what others did. We schooled, took on a job, married, and had children. Today at 64, I too am waiting for death to knock on my door. Is this what we all came for? Of course, there are many who changed the course of history by going to war and battling with others, or discovering new lands, and new technologies. With the industrial revolution machines took our places. With the entry of robotics, man had fewer jobs. Man has gone into space too. Today we have come face to face with AI that threatens yet our livelihood. Though man does not need to toil as before he finds work scarce. Man too is highly dependent on processed food that is ready to eat. To compensate for the losses in vitamins he takes supplements. We keep finding ways to compensate for the weaknesses be it in our internal or external systems. Though these new technologies have their downsides robots have assisted emergency units for instance. Where men cannot be deployed or it is inaccessible robots do the job. Wildlife documentaries have been given new life as robots get us pretty close to the wild animals.

So too we have read of many battles fought in the past, the numerous famines that took place, etc. It looks like we are going in circles. History keeps repeating. It is just that it takes a different form and happens in a different place. So one would wonder what are we doing coming back, again and again, to relive these moments as new individuals with new identities and relationships. It is a never-ending story. Should not we put an end to it? Where is the end then? Death doesn't solve it. To bring it all to an end we have to return to the source. In dying we do not go back to the source, not as yet. We enter other worlds.  As Arnold Schwarzenegger says "I shall be back' we shall return. Agathiyar told me not to fear death as it was just another journey. Death is another doorway to another journey says Agathiyar. One who faces death boldly is indeed a Siddha he says. 

"மரணம் ஒன்றும் அல்ல. மற்றொரு பயணத்தின் கதவு. மரணபயம் வேண்டாம். எவன்  ஒருவன் மரணத்தை அன்போடு வரவேற்கின்றானோ அவன் சித்தன் ஆகின்றான்."

What if we could avoid death? Then we need first of all reverse our fate. Then ensure that this physical body does not age. Life has to be sustained in it. Would I be correct in deducing then that since Agathiyar says that the Atma serves to help correct our past karma, ஆன்மாவே உனது கர்ம வினையைச் சரிசெய்வதற்கு உதவி புரியும், we should take its hands, and let it lead us in reversing our fate? The Siddhas have found the means and ways to ensure that this physical body does not age. If we could adopt the Siddha way, சித்தர் வாழ்கை நெறி முறைகள், as Agathiyar had voiced out, we could prevent aging then. Life breath is what sustains us besides food and water. The Yogis are known to go on without the latter two. 

With the Atma awakened and the body fortified, life should sustain in us then. But the Siddhas are known to switch bodies too shedding the old for a new. They are known to leave their bodies in made-made samadhis and continue living in the subtle form too.

Just as "in Buddhist philosophy, Buddha-nature is the potential for any sentient being to become a Buddha", everybody has the potential to become a Siddha too. It is whether we are aware of this great potential that lies within us. The guru brings us to this awareness. There are multiple ways we become aware of the possibilities. It might be through just seeing him, listening to him, reading his works or merely being in his company or presence. The guru then tutors us and nurtures us teaching the means and the ways to arrive there or rather connect with our inherent and true nature. He draws the veils aside that blind us from the fact that we are Buddhas and Siddhas. He removes the ignorance that covers our sight as the moss covers the pavement. When the veils are shed one by one what remains is the original Self. We come home. 

In having me stop all activities including the Siddha puja and charity and having me go within,  and with the coming of the pandemic in a timely manner, I thought that I had wasted precious time as I did not see results. As we are all action orientated, we equate action with success. Inaction seemed to speak of a failure. Mahindren opened up my eyes telling me to see it from another perspective. He told me that I had learned to let go during those 2 1/2 years. This was in reality dying before we actually physically die. The desires in us wilt and die a natural dead. Agathiyar too told me that nothing was wasted. As Agathiyar too like Tavayogi kept his words to the minimum, I could not make out what he meant. But soon I saw changes take place within me. I had a brief encounter with what I believe was the state of death too. The express train that had its depo at the Muladhara had left the depo in 2007 and had traveled some distance only to stall at the Manipura station. It continued its journey during the endemic phase. As it was bound for the seventh station, it began to pick up speed and in trying to catch up for lost time, did not stop at the other stations. There awaited the blossoming of consciousness. Stepping out of the station I walked into the arms of the awaiting Prapanjam. I came home. 

GETTING GEARED FOR A NEW ROLE

When Agathiyar told me that henceforth I shall be a guru to a couple of seekers, it sent shivers down my spine. I had always looked up to Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal as a guru. I was impressed by his knowledge, stature, majesty, the gait of his walk, his smile and pleasantness, his humbleness, his courtesy, to name a few. Besides being well-mannered, he was well-learned, and a M.A. He had researched the scriptures and text, the olai chuvadis, and the songs of the Siddhas, and could mention them off the cuff and explain and elaborate on them. He had spent his years wandering the length and breadth of India. He had lived it out in the jungles and caves. He was a mendicant, turavi, and a yogi in all manner.  Never in the years I knew him did he ask for anything from me or the others. He was always the one to give. He had no aspirations or wants. I loved him. That was the guru I knew. At times I asked myself if he was Agathiyar himself. 

I would look pale in comparison. Where was I in comparison, I asked myself. I am a householder who indulges in the pleasures of life. I lead a comfortable life. I blog in the comfort of my home. I have no great experiences to shout about. All I do is share the many wonderful moments with my gurus and whatever little I learned sitting under their shadows. But yet Agathiyar was so gracious to promote me to a guru. It is all due to the love, kindness, and compassion shown by my gurus. If Supramania Swami passed on the merits gained from his forty-year tavam, Tavayogi raised me to the state of a guru. He has me carry on the tradition and Agathiyar endorsed it. How can I repay his kindness? But am I worthy of their trust?

Sharing my fear with Mahindren, he comforted me. I understood that he wanted me not to compare myself with the mammoth but see myself as a bee contributing to the cycle of life. Yes, though I am not as qualified as Tavayogi, I could always contribute and share the many tiny weeny experiences I had along the journey and the internal experiences, transformation, and changes as Agathiyar wanted me with them he added. He reminded me of how he and many others came and saw and learned the method and means to conduct the worship of the Siddhas and its related rituals at AVM and had benefitted. They sat and listened to the many stories I had related about my journey with Tavayogi. Though they never knew either Supramania Swami or Tavayogi they traveled to India and visited the latter at his ashram based on my coverage of him and invited him to their homes too when Tavayogi came to Malaysia. Agathiyar had instructed me to teach the techniques of Nadi Sutti too, to Mahindren which he was asked to share with the rest. Agathiyar asked that I teach several others too. Besides that Agathiyar had asked that I share my experiences on this blog. All these account for a big contribution in leading seekers new to the path. These words of Mahindren comforted me. 

Knowing pretty well that I cannot possibly fit into Tavayogi's shoes, and gain the experiences that he has had, Agathiyar had simplified my role for current times and my present state. I await further instructions from Agathiyar as I am told that I have news from him in the Nadi. The last time Agathiyar spoke to me in the Nadi was in September of 2019. It has been a long wait. I look forward to some clues as to the direction I am to take. 

I TOO HAVE A DREAM

In the movie "Replicas", a scientist erases the memories of his last child from his wife and two other kids upon cloning them after they die in a road mishap. This brings us to the question if we should carry our memories along or leave them behind? What shall we be if we lose our memories? What does it mean to leave the past behind and move on? Would not we then be a different person entirely? It is these memories that we have and hold on to or rather these memories hold us together. Are we these memories? 

Life is full of memories, some that we love to revisit and recount while others we dread to think about it. The old and aged live on memories. While they seem to have lost their future, the young have a future to look out to. So how can two generations live together? While the former is counting his days the latter is looking forward to another day. 

What brightens our lives then? Love does. Be it love for another, loving nature, or loving one's job and career. These are the little flames that keep us going each day. Man basically yearns for love. Love sustains us. Imagine the world if love could unite all of us together. Love does wonders in us. Watch a child express his or her love. Watch couples express theirs. Watch buddies express their love for each other. Watch a samaritan show his love to another. Just as there is an underlying network of roots below the ground connecting the trees and plants, love could connect us all if only we give it some space to grow. The lyricist in the following song has a dream - If love could unite all of creation. வெளியெல்லாம் காதலால் நிறைத்தால் அதற்கீடேது சாமி.

But many dreams of ours remain just a dream. Even the dreams of Siddhas to see humanity evolve seem to be just a dream. Speaking to Mahindren who dropped by moments ago, we had to indulge in a subject that we rarely do at AVM. There seemed to be a necessity to discuss where the world, nation, and humanity were heading. Though speaking about it was a sour grape to swallow, we voiced our aspirations to see a new world evolve, not that we are moving to another planet as some scientist attempt in the movie "Interstellar" but how best we could live with nature. We really need divine intervention at this juncture as things have got out of hand. Man has lost his priorities in life. We are causing more harm than good. Though we cannot do much as an individual, by placing our dreams and aspirations in the Akasha and registering it with Mother Prapanjam, she might find a way to make right all the wrongs. When Lord Shiva said that we had bought the wrath of Mother Prapanjam on us in the form of the pandemic a couple of years ago, he had a handful of us carry out a Homam in our homes to cleanse and purify Prapanjam. Going by what usually takes place during Homam we have no doubt that the entire Siddha family sat with us and prayed for our safety too.

It looks like we need Agathiyar to walk this earth to bring balance as he did in times of the Puranas. Maybe he already has in place his appointees. But what can one man do? Many saints came by to deliver the message. No one listened and followed though we relay their stories again and again. Their stories remain mere stories. Is there anyone who has changed overnight reading or hearing about a saint and his life? I am glad if there are. They should then take the lead to bring awareness to others too. I guess I now am beginning to understand my purpose here and the new task Agathiyar has given me. Am I to sow the seed following in the path of Tavayogi and his gurus before him? Ramalinga Adigal speaking about Tavayogi told me once that "You traveled in his way and followed his teachings. You spread his fame and helped him attain the state of Jothi. அவன் வழி நடந்து முழுமையாக கடைபிடித்து வரும் ஒரு சீடன் நீ. அவன் புகழை பரப்பிய உன் தவ வலிமையால் அவன் ஜோதி நிலை தொட்டு விட்டான். 

But am I a fit vessel or vehicle for this mammoth task? I have so many weaknesses that I find difficult to overcome as it is. How can I guide another? I would ridicule myself and bring shame upon the Siddhas. That is the last thing I want to do. Agathiyar once asked me to walk tall. I have to keep to his word. It is no easy task being a guru. I have watched Tavayogi closely. I know the pain and tribulations that come with it. All the saints too have seen their fair share of troubles. 

I have always rejected all the offers that Agathiyar made in the past. Should I reject this too? But this is happening by his grace. The divine and Prapanjam want to reward its student with a free upgrade. Should I deny it? Ramalinga Adigal said once that "Whenever you say it is enough you shall tend to gain more."

போதும் என்ற மனமே பொன் செய்யும் மருந்து. நீ போதும் என்று சொல்லும் நிலை உன்னை அறியாமல் நீ பெற்றுக் கொண்டுதான் இருக்கிறாய்.

As it is there are too many gurus claiming all sorts of things. I do not want to add to them. Just when I desired to be left alone in my own fortress which is AVM, Ramalinga Adigal comes along and turns it to Gnana Peedham. As Tavayogi always tells us, I too now wonder what else shall take place and what more shall he do?

THE THEECHA MANTRA

Just as one can only receive an acknowledgment from one's guru after sticking around with him for some 12 years, much of what Supramania Swami, Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal, Ramalinga Adigal, and Agathiyar said in the past only makes some sense now after some 20 years.

As my parents had shown me and my siblings god as the paintings and statues at our home altar and in the temples, God to us then was the painting and the statue. 

From Sariyai that is living in the world that God created, where only our thoughts reach out to him,  the guru comes to lead us to know him up close and better. With the coming of the guru, he brings us to Kriyai. We begin to take up rituals and practices, directly communicating and dealing with God now. God whom we saw outside in places of worship in Sariyai comes to reside in our hearts as a mantra in Kriyai and resonates within us 24/7. God is now the very Mantra. 

From looking after our own needs the guru brings us to open our eyes to the reality around us and gets us involved with charity and feeding. We begin to help those in need. Compassion blossoms within our hearts. God is now Love. 

Our heart opens up to him and he now takes abode in our homes and within us, or rather the soul in us is awakened from its deep slumber. The soul that went into hibernation as a result of our ego calling the shots, awakes and takes its rightful place. With this surrender, God and the soul call the shots now. God and the soul are one now. 

Now it is time to work on the physical body, that is one of many. The guru introduces us to become aware of our Vaasi or breath, which we hardly notice just as the heart and many other organs go on doing their work unnoticed. Just like nature, the body too does not expect us to acknowledge its presence and its worth. But the day both perish we are jolted out of our dream state. Then we scramble to take action which is a bit too late. It is of utmost importance to care for the body as we would care for a precious entity or thing. It is only with this body that we can come to know God. Hence the reason all the saints had spoken about how rare a human birth is. Do not waste this opportunity to know God. 

Through a disciplined lifestyle and adhering to the calls made by the Siddhas, the body that is meat in essence is slowly and carefully transformed into a jewel. First, the thrash that has been accumulated for years as a result of an improper diet that the yogis term as Rajasic and Tamasic has to be thrown out or dispelled from the body. The physical body is renewed. From an impure body or Asudha Degam, we take on a pure or Sudha Degam. In detoxifying the internals, removing and eliminating toxins from the body, and then feeding it with healthy nutrients, we then move on to a deeper cleansing reaching for the very cells that are then transformed and return to their original state of purity. Both science and mysticism come together bringing this transformation together. 

Just picking up the techniques and science of Yoga is insufficient. We would just end up as another master and teacher on the subject, or just having a beautiful and healthy body. For one to move on or within and transform further into the Pranava and Gnana Degam, the Divine Light or Arutperunjhothi has to come within. Swami Saravanananda in his book, an English translation of Ramalinga Adigal’s "Aruperunjhoti Agaval" published by Ramalinga Mission, Madras, writes that "The Divine Light seems to change the very cell of the body, with the result, that they seem to function in the opposite direction."

Marshall Govindan in his book "Babaji and the Eighteen Siddha Kriya Yoga Tradition", 1991, Kriya Yoga Publications (Reg), 196 Mountain Road, P.O.Box 90, Eastman, Quebec, Canada, reproduced with permission via e-mail), writes that, "When this universal love and sacred warmth develops, the body, as well as the soul, became prepared for the descent of the grace, in the form of light."

Swami Saravanananda writes further, "With the descent of sufficient Divine Light the psychic head begins to emerge. According to Vallalar, this psychic head (a crown or diadem of light) is made up of a special and highly refined type of brain called Omkar brain. As soon as it emerges, it draws more cosmic light; the more the light the greater the growth of the psychic head. With the advent of the psychic head, more and more changes take place in the already purified body. The cells and thence the whole body begins to transcend the limits imposed on them by impure Maya (the grosser principle of nature) and try to break one more of its veils. The cells undergo alternate condensation and expansion for an unspecified period and the body slowly emerges out of its bondage and begins to grow. This expanding and ever-prospering body is called the subtle body or the body of Omkar or Pranava body.

Ramalinga Adigal told us that "the Prana Sakti moving in you is itself Pranava Degam. When you sense the Pranavam you shall question yourself if the Pranavam is driving you or you are driving it. When you reach that state you shall have the answer. That moment shall be one of extreme bliss. Go deep within this bliss."

பிராண சக்தி ஊடுருவிச் செல்கிறதே அதுவே பிரணவ தேகம்.  பிரணவத்தின் சக்தி உணரும் தருணம் உன் பிரணவத்தால் ஊடுகிறாயா? அல்லது பிரணவம் உன்னுள் ஊடுகிறதா என்று தோன்றும். என்று அப்படியில் காலடி வைகிறாயோ அன்று உமக்கு விடை பிறக்கும். பிரணவத்தின் நீயே அதைக் காண்பாய். அது பேர் ஆனந்தம்.  இன்பத்தில் ஆழ்ந்து கொண்டு வா. 

Dr. K.Loganathan in referring to Agathiyar's "Gnana Saitanyam" quotes Agathiyar: "My son! These truths have been hidden by the Siddhas from the reach of ordinary people. For unless they become BEING orientated and have trust in HIM, He will not instruct on these secrets assuming the form of Guru. I Akattiyar, disclose now these secrets of Sivayoga for the benefit of those good sons of mine."

Here we understand the reason Agathiyar initiated us through Tavayogi on his Theecha mantra that was not to be spelled out to anybody. Tavayogi told us quite bluntly that our heads would blow up into pieces if revealed. This mantra is passed on to the student by the guru during the first initiation the student receives. At the onset itself, Agathiyar defines the path for his student through his mantra. It is just that as we are freshies we never got the message then. Today the puzzles have come together. In reciting his name we are then brought to realize that he is the very breath in us. Taking hold of our breath we come to realize and experience the Prapanjam that has its source in the Pranavam AUM or OM and vice versa. Agathiyar in his "Agathiyar Antharanga Theechavithi", அகத்தியர் அந்தரங்க தீட்சாவிதி, mentions that the Pranavam AUM or OM is the source or seed, ஓமென்ற பிரணவமே ஆதி வஸ்து. Tavayogi simplifies it in his book "Andamum Pindamum". AUM that is the Pranavam was the source. From it originated all the energies (often referred to as the Prapanja Sakthi). ஓம் என்கின்ற பிரணவம் தான் ஆதி என்பதும், அந்த ஆதி வஸ்துவே உலகமெல்லாம் நிறைந்து நிர்கின்ற ஆதி சக்தி. 

As the body is relative to the universe, a study of either one will justify the other. Tavayogi spells out that the existence of the Pranavam in consciousness is also within us in our heads. When my daughter as a child was complaining of pain in the throat, the doctors examined her and could not find anything wrong with her. We brought her to the Buddhist Maha Vihara in Brickfields. We were blessed to have the Chief High Priest the late Venerable Dr. K. Sri Dhammananda Nayaka Maha Thera see us personally. After graciously seeing us, he placed his hand slightly above her head and hummed the "M" syllable and sound in the last portion of the Pranavam AUM for some moments. She was relieved of the pain. Now we understand the significance of the Pranavam AUM and what the Chief High Priest did. The mantra resonates within, healing the self, and is easily absorbed by others in our presence as in osmosis. Now we understand why Ramalinga Adigal termed the psychic head as Omkar brain. That to which we once were connected through the crown of our head that was yet to be fully developed as a child, is eventually reached out in the developed psychic brain in one who gains the grace of God. 

The Grace of God has come to us beginners as his Theecha mantra. By the Grace of God, we have come to receive his Theecha mantra. He has lit the lamp in us. It is our duty to fan the flame to burn brighter by repeating the mantra till this very mantra that is him engulfs us in flames and we attain the state of Gnanam and Jothi, acquiring the Gnana Degam and the Oli Degam.

In telling us to pursue our efforts and that Gnanam was not given or gifted, but has to be earned, and that all the efforts that the Siddhas ask to place and carry out are tried and tested methods that they themselves had carried out in the past, they reveal that we would eventually come to understand the reason we were born. Agathiyar told us that "When your breath touches the சுழுமுனை or Suzhumunai, and traverses the seven chakras one by one, and upon reaching the seventh chakra, a Sakti or power will come within. That is சுழிமுனை or Suzhimunai. Then everything is clear. That is Gnanam. The answer shall dawn. At that moment we shall know the reason for taking birth."

உமது மூச்சி உனது சுழுமுனை தொட்டு உமது ஏழு சக்கரங்களில் பயணம் செய்யும் கால் ஏழாவது சக்கரம் தொடும் நிலையில் நீ உனது பிறவிக்கான பலனை அறிவாய். உனது நிலையை நீ தொடும்போது அக்கணம் உன்னை அறியாமல் உன்னை நோக்கி ஒரு  சக்தி உன்னுள் இறங்கும் - அதுவே சுழிமுனை. நீங்கள் உள் பயணிக்கும்போது எல்லாம் தெளிவாகத் தெரியும் சமயம் திரை விலகியத்திற்கு அர்த்தம். அதுதான் ஞானம். ஆதாவது நீ பிறந்ததன் நோக்கம் அறிவாய். 

Just as we need a fire to light another fire we need the gurus on this journey. Ramalinga Adigal gives us the boost we need to journey further. He says that "Tavayogi in his light form, is trying to bring salvation to you. He is traveling with you. You traveled in his way and followed his teachings. You spread his fame and helped him attain the state of Jothi. He who is currently with you shall continue to travel with you. There is much to learn. You have my blessings. I shall travel with you too till you reach the destination. I accompany those who go deep within. Follow your breath. Place the effort and you shall reach the destination."

"தவயோகி ஆத்ம ஜோதியாய் உங்களை கரை தேர்த இன்னமும் முயற்சிக்கிறான். உங்களோடே பயணிக்கிறான். அவன் வழி நடந்து முழுமையாக கடைபிடித்து வரும் ஒரு சீடன் நீ. அவன் புகழை பரப்பிய உன் தவ வலிமையால் அவன் ஜோதி நிலை தொட்டு விட்டான். தற்பொழுது அவன் உங்களை வழி நடுத்த உங்கள் அருகில்தான் இருக்கிறான். இன்னும் இன்றும் உங்களோடு பயணிக்கிறான். நீ கற்பதற்கு இன்னும் இருக்கிறது. எனது பரிபூரண ஆசியோடு கற்பிப்பாய். உன்னுள் ஜோதி எரியும் வரை நான் உன்னோடு வருவேன். ஆழ்ந்து இருப்போருடன் நான் சேர்ந்து இருக்கிறேன். உமது பிரணவத்தை கொண்டு செல். ஜோதியோடு கலப்பாய். 

Dr. K.Loganathan aptly emphasizes here that "the study of scriptures, memorizing reciting and so forth in a ritualistic manner is quite useless unless real metaphysical journeys are entered into and something that's possible only if BEING helps along as the Inner Guru. An important precondition for this help to become available is the Openness and Fluidity of the mind. A mind that is NOT OPEN, fluid and flexible, because it is NOT READY to LEARN and reform itself is denied this kind of help."

SCIENCE & MYSTICISM

In the movie, "Replicas", a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough has a discussion with his doctor wife. The scientist who revives or rather clones his family members who die in a crash later in the movie believes that life doesn't have to be cut short. The wife tells him "Maybe there is something more that makes us human, like a soul." The scientist believes "we are a sum total of what we are told and how we process it. It is all neurochemistry." She then questions him. Is that all she and their children are? "Just pathways, electrical signals, and chemistry?" She tells him, "You have kids that love you and a wife that adores you."

Watching the scientist go about his work I recall having heard how someone treats the sick at his home. I had taken a colleague to him upon hearing that he was a healer many years ago. We went thrice but he finally told us that he could not heal my friend. He was honest and stopped after the third attempt. My friend passed away some time back. I came to get an insight into how he mysteriously summons certain souls in a certain profession who are said to have neglected their duty and purpose here and had no home to return to after they had passed on until they did some service to those living and still around, as a means of correcting or balancing the act or balance the sheet. It seems he draws invisible panels and screens down and begins to punch in data, analyze them and work on the patients just as they are operated on at the operation theatre, minus the anesthetic, the monitors, the tools, and the degree. It was a gift to him from unseen forces that helped him with his incurable stomach pain many years earlier. The deal was that in return he had to help others with their illnesses and diseases.

Similarly, I have heard of a relative of a colleague who dreamt of receiving gems and jewels that he was to use to heal others. Upon walking on the beach one day, he found them lying on the beach waiting for him just as he saw in his dream. 

Closer to home, my wife had a dream, of seeing Tavayogi hold something in his hands where letters appeared in gold. She had seen the Jeeva Nadi that was to come into Tavayogi's possession later.

If some see all this as man playing god, the gurus and masters like the scientist do it often too. We have seen and heard of miracles where life is given or at least prolonged long enough for one to finish his business and tie up the loose ends here before leaving. Agathiyar told us that he had heeded our prayers and saved Tavayogi bringing together the Siddhas to sit and light the Yagam. Tavayogi had several months at his disposal to hand over the management of the ashram to Mataji Sarojini Ammaiyar and the assets to the trustees and teach her to read the Jeeva Nadi before he went into samadhi. 

A devotee's mother was given an extension of five years by Agathiyar for the son to fulfill whatever outstanding responsibilities towards his mother as asked. Shirdi Sai whom she worshipped came to take her back after the said duration was over. 

A newborn child was given his life back after Agathiyar intervened when they pleaded with him. 

A man who stood out while his son prayed inside the Sri Siva Shanmugar cave temple in Sungai Siput and who later to kill his time swept the temple premises clean came alive after the doctors declared him dead. 

A devotee who brought Nadi readers over from India and brought many to read the Nadi was saved after going into a coma. Agathiyar told him that he had given his breath to save him. It is understood that new blood vessels mysteriously appeared. 

Agathiyar told my daughter that he had come with Tirumoolar and hiked up her platelet count when she succumbed to dengue. 

We have read about many saints reviving the dead too. 

Makes you wonder if science and mysticism cross paths. I once told the lesser deities that we shall not cross paths after watching devotees and bystanders go into trances and these deities using them and their vocal cords to communicate with us. My elder brother too was used as a vessel by them to communicate. But Agathiyar wanted to send a strong message to me I suppose that everything is inclusive in this wide world of ours and doesn't want me to negate any single thing. In a timely manner, he had a seeker frequent AVM. Soon these deities and gods came through him and I was asked to accommodate their presence too. My family was told to just watch and give access to the venue and our bodies for them to play their divine lila. It was all part of the act of Agathiyar I was to realize later. I dropped the fear I had and the distancing that I kept previously with the lesser deities and gods and goddesses. We became buddies eventually. Soon Agathiyar and the Siddhas too joined the bandwagon and came in me and this devotee too, often switching places. With them came the main deities too. AVM suddenly turned into a portal for the gods to reach out to us and manifest. Just as a bride plans so much for her wedding and everything turns topsy turvy we stopped planning these days as we got to know who was in charge here. Readers might think we are nuts, going mad, or as a medical person suggested hallucinating. Well, I am not here to increase the ratings or the readership. I am just plain sharing what is heard and seen, felt and experienced.

I guess there will come a day when both scientists and holy men take the stage but not to debate or refute the findings or understanding of the other but to agree wholly in all matters. 

WHEN THE SIDDHAS LEND A HAND AND A SHOULDER

In life, we tend to place several priorities above others. First comes the fight over toys and other's possessions, then the paper chase followed by eyeing the best-paid job, and later eyeing a lady to settle down with and have children. 

Many would settle for this life till the end of their lives. But there are those who tend to feel an emptiness, even with all this wealth around them. Why does this happen? The soul in them knows that its place is with god. True and absolute happiness is not in having family and friends around, in having money to spend but in the company of the divine. Some may begin to scout around to find true happiness while others who had a vague idea about god might venture to know him better, though late in life. 

I had a young maiden turn up with her mother at AVM after reading this blog. They told me that they were in the worship of the Siddhas for the past ten years. I was impressed by the devotion towards Agathiyar that this mother and child had. Apparently, as a child, she was told of the wonders of Agathiyar and the Siddhas by one of her relatives whom I came to know was a friend of ours too. I guess he lit the fire in her and Agathiyar kept it burning in her. Life dealt a blow to her in her teens depriving her of furthering her dream to become a doctor. Agathiyar asked that Thondu Seivom and Pothigai Tharma Chakra, two groups that we were aligned with in carrying out charity to assist her in seeing her dreams come true. Readers who know me personally can get in touch with me too.

It amazes me how the Siddhas lend a hand and a shoulder in times of our needs. We had devotees saved by their hidden hand as he rode his bike into the back of a lorry at the lights and saved from slipping while climbing a rock in the Pothigai hills. This girl and mother team too tell me of the many moments when they saw the mystical hand save them from danger. 

We have heard about many souls turning saints early in life. Be it their yearning or an inborn magnetism toward god often drives them away from their families and homes in search of answers to life's questions. When we are often obsessed with life's possessions they saw life as transitory. If life itself was transitory what then of our possessions. These are the saints who kept reminding us to return home. 

HOLDING ON TIGHT

We have two scenarios here. One at the beginning of the journey and another at the tail end of it. As beginners, we are told that god resides in the paintings and statues. As we are familiar with playing with toys as kids it comes easy and we can accept this concept. My three-year-old granddaughter asked her mother as they prepared food to be offered to God if God eats. My grandchildren will feed us using their imagination while at play. It all goes well with them and us adults too. Agathiyar told us that my daughter in her last birth would pick the fruits, that I and my wife, who were fruit peddlers, left at Agathiyar's feet at his shrine in Papanasam, and feed him asking him to eat them. Similarly, devotees bring garments, flowers, and fruits to dress, garland, and feed God. These serve as an act of appreciation and thanksgiving to God.

As we embark on the journey with the Siddhas we begin to have a clearer understanding. We better understand the concept behind all these devotions and their related acts. We come to know and realize that God is beyond form and name. God to us then is the very Prapanjam that creates, sustains, veils, showers its grace, and eventually self-destructs. 

So too it goes with our understanding of fate and destiny. There is fate that runs its course. Then as we embark on the journey with the Siddhas we begin to have a clearer understanding. We realize that we are given the freedom and choice to change what was fated. Each decision we make either churns out the run-of-the-mill ordered and programmed fate or creates a new destiny. We are given the freedom to change our fate and create a new destiny. Just as there is a calling from them the Siddhas come to our aid to assist if called for. Agathiyar in asking my daughter about her choice and decision on two matters was waiting for her reply. As she was quiet he told her, "Some other time then," and moved on to me and my wife and told us not to force her into making a decision. Coming later he asked her again. Seeing her remain silent he told her to come to him once she decides. I guess he was planning something for her and he did not want to force it on her. 

For some, the Siddhas come down hard on them and direct them on what to do giving them no choices or the liberty to choose or make a decision. The Siddhas expect them to follow. There is no avenue to make a deal here. If they do not follow their directives, the Siddhas back off and let fate run its course.

To those who have followed through with their teachings and practices the Siddhas then come to ask them to even surrender this freedom of choice. When we surrender they begin to chart the course of our lives bringing on what is good for us in their perspective instead of what we consider as good through our tainted and disillusioned perspective. 

Sadly we somehow find it difficult to surrender our freedom. Many prefer to follow the crowd that is engaged in merry-making. The lure of the outside world is too great to refuse and begin to look inwards. Most tend to keep quiet and do not want to commit themselves to the cause of the Siddhas. Some might fear the Siddhas and hesitate to step in. I guess those who have come together in the name of the Siddhas in the past are partly to be blamed too, having painted a bleak picture of them. When I turned up at the door of several movements in the years of my search, I had some dejected souls who left the path passing their fear on me telling me that one would have to leave everything and live a life of a hermit. Others claimed that the Siddhas would wreck my family too and break relationships as they did theirs. But for one who has traveled far and long on the path and those who stood steadfast on the path would know otherwise. It is only a matter of who holds on to them till their last day. Agathiyar has never told anyone in our circle that he has to leave his family and become a hermit. Agathiyar and Tavayogi have always asked us to bring the whole family into the worship of the Siddhas. They have us organize joint prayers to extend the Siddha circle. Agathiyar sent many newcomers to join the Pornami puja at my home. Agathiyar visited their homes and had their family members engaged in the worship as well. 

As we embark on the journey with the Siddhas we begin to have a clearer understanding of the subject of the soul or Atma too. The Siddhas connect to the souls within us. Identifying these potential souls, they desperately look for ways to help us draw the veil of illusion aside and to free us from the chains of one's ego. The ego in us draws its ugly head at the very moment when we realize that we can make decisions. We forget our true nature and instead identify with the ego, that goes on a rampage. A guru comes along to tame the mad elephant in us. We are brought to face our souls that went into hiding the moment our ego superseded them. 

In some rare cases, Agathiyar goes deeper and addresses the Atma himself asking it what it wants, usually in matters of making a choice as to continuing to live or ending this journey. He responds accordingly to Atma's wish. Here too we have a choice. When the family of a bedridden man took the initiative to seek the Nadi and carried out the remedies on his behalf, yet the man passed away. Was Agathiyar to be faulted? People around them thought so and tried to extinguish their spirit and faith in the Siddhas, blaming and ridiculing Agathiyar for not being able to save the man. They told the family members that they had wasted money and time listening to the Siddhas. There is never a reading for a dead man, yet Agathiyar called up the family and asked them what was he to do when the Atma had given up on living. The Siddhas listened to the Atma that wanted to be liberated. When Agathiyar confronted someone else and asked her to delve deep and ask her Atma what it wanted, she chose to reply that she wanted to live. 

Traveling the path with the Siddhas our understanding of life and what it offers changes with experience. We eventually tend to accept all these in good faith without losing our faith in the Siddhas or whatever belief we profess currently. These are the true devotees of whatever path they might be in. They hold tight till the end of life's journey.

STEPPING INTO THE NEXT PHASE

If Agathiyar had me prepared to come to his path through a mysterious initiation on a stormy Saturday afternoon of 2001, with a mantra that invoked Lord Vasudeva, and a year later had me come to worship him and the many Siddhas besides the deities through a calling in the Nadi, with the coming of a guru in the physical form in 2005 I was officially initiated into the path. As Tavayogi took me literally walking the path passing on his experiences and Gnana as we trekked the jungles and caves, he told me that that was the beginning of a new and true journey. That was the first phase. I had embarked on Kriyai after leaving Sariyai.

Prior to all these Lord Shiva had in coming through a dream in 1988, brought a halt to all the questions that arose within me as I began to compare what I read in the books with what I saw in reality. As it did not match, I was confused and angry. He did me a favor by having me take a break to cool off. That cooling period eventually extended to some 14 years of abstinence from all forms of worship, Satsang, and further reading. That was the preliminary phase.

The second phase started after Agathiyar and Patanjali (in the Nadi) and Tavayogi in 2007 began instructing me on certain yogic practices. I embarked on Yogam.

As I traveled solo and was later joined by my family after Tavayogi initiated them too into the path in 2005, beginning in 2013 Agathiyar sent over several youths to watch and learn the Pornami Puja that I conducted with my family on full moon nights. This was the third phase, where we ventured to include charity in our agenda besides the group prayers or Koothu Prathanai. 

After Tavayogi went into samadhi on 3 July 2018 and as all good things too have to come to an end, in 2019 Agathiyar brought a halt to all our activities and had us go our way having picked up the tools and tricks of the trade. He dispersed the crowd that at times would number some sixty gathering at my small home that had taken on a name, a label, and a tag for easy identification - Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM).

Soon the pandemic that triggered the numerous lockdowns followed on the heels of the shutdown at AVM. It was each man for himself now carrying out puja and charity in his home with his family. Though this period brought on fear and anguish and sufferings to mankind, it was also a blessing in disguise for me as it was a forced isolation to pursue further the directive to go in and within. During this fourth phase, Agathiyar was constantly by our side. 

During the endemic phase that subsequently followed, Agathiyar and Ramalinga Adigal guided us coming through other devotees. Agathiyar as the bronze statue stepped out of AVM again, last having done so in 2016 and directing later that he was not to be moved, traveled to several homes and began to speak through devotees. Agathiyar began to address on Gnanam giving us divine knowledge. During this phase, the fifth, my body saw changes take place as a result of all the worship and practices that I had followed earlier. 

Agathiyar has me stepping into the sixth phase now asking me to take on the role of a guru that I am questioning my eligibility and worth. Should I or should not I assume the post? Should I forego as I did in refusing the Nadi that was to come my way for keeps and for my reference and others? Should I refuse to accept it, as did I when given the enormous task of building a temple for Agathiyar and Lord Murugan? As I ponder over it he has already started sending some seekers over to my home that Ramalinga Adigal has now rebranded Gnana Peedham. Just as Balamurugan said that he felt very small and insignificant in the face of standing before Mount Kailash during his pilgrimage to this sacred mountain in 2011, I feel incompetent to shoulder such a huge responsibility. As Ramalinga Adigal told me the more we refuse them, the more shall the Prapanjam shower us with gifts I guess I have to finally say yes to satisfy Prapanjam. I guess by submitting to its wishes we would satisfy the 5th tenet of Agathiyar's sermon on the purpose of man, to the Rishis at the Tamil Sangam of days past, that of "aiding and helping, towards the ongoing evolution of all co-existing beings and entities, existing upon the lower levels of the evolutionary ladder, dutifully supporting the manifested matrix or Prapanjam" after have satisfied the 4th tenet earlier, that of "dutifully aiding and helping, the ongoing evolution of all co-existing human beings." (Vashisht Vaid's post on his blog https://holysageagathiyar.com/)

But I do not know the formalities and the rules of the book. We have always looked up to another as a guru. Now that we are being placed in their shoes what do we do? What is the role of a guru? How far-stretched is his responsibility toward his students? All these questions have to be answered before we can possibly step into this next phase.

FULFILLING ONE'S DUTY

Speaking to Mahindren about this evening's development, we came to realize that there was indeed the need for a guru in the physical form. Mahindren referred to the single journey that Tavayogi took me on into the jungles and to the caves where he had trekked and stayed during the days of his search. In doing so I was spared the years that he spent doing it. I was given his Gnana gained all those years in a single day. Now I understand why Tavayogi told me with surprise that we had come this far with ease while he had to struggle. He had passed on his merits to us. 

Similarly, Supramania Swami who had carried out his tavam for some 40 years in stating that he cannot possibly bring the merits of his years of tavam with him and had to leave it behind, hence in giving me the merits of his tavam had skyrocketed me making it easy on me.

It is quite similar to a student getting credit transfers and credit hour exemptions on certain papers as in moving from a diploma to a bachelor's. My am I glad I met my gurus in the physical form. 

When I told Agathiyar that since I had nothing to do as he had stopped our routine of doing puja and charity in 2019 I wanted to call it a day. He asked me to lay off the thought as he has a certain task coming my way. Later he tells me that I had gained sufficient soul power or Atma Balam to take on the role of a guru. Much later on he sends some new seekers as students telling me that he had fulfilled my desire and also joked that since I could not remain quiet he gave me a new job.

So it looks like I have to reconsider my earlier plea to Agathiyar in the last post, "But how can one ignorant and in the dark like me bring others to light? It would be like the blind leading the blind. I shall have to turn down their offer to the post of a guru. As a seeker is about to arrive at AVM in an hour's time at 4pm Saturday for her initiation into the path as instructed by Agathiyar that she seek initiation from me in her latest Nadi reading, I shall have to back off."

I guess just like Agathiyar sent the many youngsters to AVM in 2013 after their Nadi readings to watch and participate in the Pournami Puja, I shall be passing on to others whatever little I learned from my gurus on the path. This I guess would fulfill the 4th tenet that Agathiyar spoke of that of "dutifully aiding and helping, the ongoing evolution of all co-existing human beings." The Gnani would go further fulfilling the 5th tenet of assisting in the "ongoing evolution of all co-existing beings and entities, existing upon the lower levels of the evolutionary ladder, dutifully supporting the manifested matrix or prapanjam." 

As the guru only exist as long as the students are around if they do not stay long enough it means that Agathiyar has listened to my plea just as he had listened to Jnana Jothiamma and changed her course of life bringing it to an abrupt end. 

STILLING THE MIND

In revisiting the documentary series "Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds - Part 1 - Akasha" we are told that "The ancient Vedic teachers taught Nada Brahma, the universe is vibration. The word Nada means sound or vibration. The vibratory field is at the root of all true spiritual experiences and scientific investigations. It is the same field of energy that saints, Buddhas, yogis, mystics, priests, shamans, and seers have observed by looking within themselves. It has been called Akasha, the Primordial Om, .. and a thousand other names throughout history...... In the ancient traditions of the East, it has been understood for thousands of years that all is vibration....You never see anything in its totality because it is made up of layer upon layer of vibration and it is constantly changing, exchanging information with Akasha.... everything is connected to the one vibratory source. ..."

"Like the ancient yogis, Tesla used the term Akasha to describe the etheric feel that extends throughout all things...." As Tesla described it as the etheric feel so did Agathiyar. Agathiyar told us the same too that he was this very vibration in all of creation. Agathiyar often asked us what we felt as we went along doing puja, charity, meditation, etc. The feeling that comes on in us is he, he said. The vibration that is felt in these moments is he, he said. But just as we are told that "everything appears to be made of vibration, but there is no "thing" being vibrated. It is as if there has been an invisible dancer, a shadow dancing hidden in the ballet of the universe. All the other dancers have always danced around this hidden dancer. We have observed the choreography of the dance but until now we could not see that dancer... ", the invisible dancer or vibration would then be "the origin of all repetition, pattern, and form", "the divine animating principle pervading the universe" and "that out of which the unmanifest becomes manifest." This would be Shiva's dance. 

"In Kaballah or Jewish Mysticism, they talk about the divine name of God. The name that cannot be spoken. It cannot be spoken because it is a vibration that is everywhere. It is all words, all matter." I guess this is what we mean by "Suyam" as in Suyambu Lingam and Suyam Jothi, that which evolves or originates on its own.

We are told of "The timeless world of waves and the solid world of things... We are creating the illusion of solidity, of things by labeling, by naming. The philosopher Kierkegaard says that "If you name me you negate me. By giving me a name, a label, you negate all the other things I could possibly be. You lock the particle into being a thing by pinning it down and naming it, but at the same time, you are creating it, defining it to exist... With the creation of things comes time, which is what creates the illusion of solidity."

I guess this is how the sages of the past gave form and name to energies they saw to give an idea and bring the common folk to understand the mystic world that they saw, better. As man then could think less but could follow easily, it became the norm in worship till these days. 

Is this the reason after revealing himself as the Prapanjam Agathiyar chose to move his statue from my home to that of  another devotee? He was now formless and nameless to us now.

In "Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds - Part 2 - The Spiral", we read a quote from Albert Einstein.

"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. He to whom the emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand wrapped in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed." I am glad I am "alive" to the wonders around me.

"Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds - Part 3 - The Serpent and the Lotus" we are told that "If you stare at the abyss long enough eventually you shall find the abyss stare back at you." For one who has failed miserably in meditating, Agathiyar helped us out here. The guru is always present to lift us when our efforts fail, to lift our spirits when we are down, and to wake us up when we have "overslept". 

Watching  Part 4 of "Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds - Beyond Thinking", we realize that if we could accept thoughts as one of the senses too, we can easily shut them out just as we shut out our other senses. As we are told that we have elevated the thoughts to such a degree  it has taken control of us. As thoughts lead to action, in going within, the thoughts subside or are arrested the moment they arise since we are not action bound in these moments. 

We are told that in the heart is the union of Siva and Sakthi. Lord Muruga came to instruct us to open up our hearts and soul and to surrender. We were told by Ramalinga Adigal to open our souls and hearts, உங்கள் ஆத்மவை திறந்து வையுங்கள், உங்கள் இதயத்தைத் திறந்து  வையுங்கள். Bhagawan Ramana said that "Through meditation, you can learn to find the Self in the cave of this Heart."  In Christian spirituality, we are told that "The Heart is a sanctuary of silence." Tavayogi told us that the journey begins and ends with the heart. Bliss arises from the heart. Compassion arises from the heart too. 

Nithyanandam Swamigal questions his disciples about who is the guru. He says that he is only a guru if our hearts accept him as one and listen to him. But most of the time, our hearts take the upper hand and dictate our lives. The Manam presides over everything.

What is the point in vomiting others' theories? We must learn to drop all our learnings. Only when the vessel is empty can the Siddhas fill it with their stuff and teachings. When they come to reside in our hearts they teach us from within. Divine knowledge dawns then. 

Hence we see the saints tame their hearts. When we open our hearts to the Siddhas, they step into our lives. What is generally accepted as fate can then be changed with the coming of Siddhas into our lives. The key word here is surrender. We have to let go of the reins. Only with surrender and acceptance, can they then bring on the desired changes in our lives easily. 

We have read that in ancient times people sought after Soma, a drink that supposedly brought instant immortality. Stephanie W. Jamison and Joel P. Brereton translate the Rigveda (8.48.3): We have drunk the soma; we have become immortal; we have gone to the light; we have found the gods. What can hostility do to us now, and what the malice of a mortal, o immortal one? (Source: Wikipedia) 

In the movie "Lucy", we see Lucy who is tricked into becoming a drug mule caught and kicked in the stomach, breaking the bag of drugs that in order to transport the drug, was forcibly sewn into her abdomen, releasing it into her system. She begins to acquire "enhanced physical and mental capabilities." (Source: Wikipedia) 

Watching the movie "Limitless" we see how Eddie Morra who is lost for ideas to write, is seen able to recall perfectly and access knowledge at an incredible speed, after taking a substance to improve cognitive functions. He begins to tidy up his room and keeps it clean. He has a haircut and changes his earlier 'man living on the street' look to that of a neat and polished writer. As he sits to write again at his laptop, the words shower on him. This is how I see words appear as I hastily try to capture them lest they disappear. I am becoming more particular about sorting and organizing things too giving them a due place in my space. But I am not on any drug or medication. Why and how is this happening? Yogi Ramsuratkumar is said to have moved a teacup to its original place when a guest moved it when they were served tea by his aid. 

If drugs are seen to stimulate certain faculties, the body naturally has the ability to perform superhuman feats. With the rise of the sleeping serpent tremendous abilities come to the forefront, we are told. But the Siddhas and saints never did exercise or show off these powers. This would tend to distract them from their goal of returning to the source or Samadhi. All the gifts that come their way in traveling the path would only be an obstacle to one determined to return home. Good sense or Arivu should prevail at these times. One should learn to say no and move on. I have been tested many times unknowingly. Only after some time does Agathiyar reveal it was a test of our commitment to the path and the goal. I am glad that I managed to sail through unscathed. The reason I was saved was that I heeded all their advice, and directives.

I am indebted to the Siddhas who looked over my shoulder till now. I cannot imagine where I would be if not for their timely intervention and manner and hand in saving me. So what do we do in return? Abide by their rules. In "Abide as the Self" the opening statement goes as follows "Whatever the means adopted, you must at last return to the Self." Bhagawan Ramana calls the source the Self. He then puts forth the question, "Why not abide as the Self here and now?" We are told "You are the Self. You are already That." We are told that a state free of thoughts is our true nature. 

Bhagawan surprises us with these words from the book "Talks with Sri Ramana Maharshi". He says "Silence is ever speaking. It is a perennial flow of language that is interrupted by speaking. These words that I am speaking obstruct the mute language. Silence is the eternal flow of language, obstructed by words."

In "Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds - Part 1 - Akasha" we are told that "Einstein was the first scientist to realize that what we think of as empty space is not nothing, it has properties, and intrinsic to the nature of space is nearly unfathomable amounts of energy. The renowned physicist Richard Feynman once said there is enough energy in a single cubic meter of space to boil all the oceans in the world. Advanced meditators know that in the stillness lies the greatest power." 

I never saw silence from this perspective. When we thought that silence is the absence of noise, Ramana tells us it is a state of stillness and inner peace. No wonder Agathiyar and Ramalinga Adigal have continuously harped on it and had us sit still, observe the breath, and still the mind.

A true guru would not become enlightened and leave others in the dungeon. "In the Buddhist tradition, the Bodhisattva is the person with an awakened Buddha nature. A Bodhisattva vows to help to awaken every being in the universe, realizing that there is only one consciousness. To awaken one's true self one must awaken all beings." Agathiyar too put forth the same that we "dutifully aid and help, the ongoing evolution of all co-existing human beings" as the fourth tenet and "extend this aid and help, towards "the ongoing evolution of all co-existing beings and entities, existing upon the lower levels of the evolutionary ladder, dutifully supporting the manifested matrix or prapanjam" as the final among five tenets in the Tamil Sangam that serve as the core purpose of human birth. This comes after man has learned and understood his purpose in taking birth. With his purpose known, he thanks the divine creator or energy that brought forth his birth (through consultation with the lunar forefathers and their angelic hierarchies that co-exist with us down here) and thanks all the caretakers both seen and unseen, in the present and the past. 

Hence we see the awakened ones trying hard to awaken the others. Agathiyar and Ramalinga Adigal have tried hard to awaken us from our deep slumber. They have tried to bring us out of our state of ignorance. They have roped me in too. But how can one ignorant and in the dark like me bring others to light? It would be like the blind leading the blind. I shall have to turn down their offer to the post of a guru. As a seeker is about to arrive at AVM in an hour's time at 4pm Saturday (this post was drafted on Thursday) for her initiation into the path as instructed by Agathiyar that she seek initiation from me in her latest Nadi reading, I shall have to back off. Let the initiation come from Agathiyar and Ramalinga Adigal himself.

SETS & ATMA

Speaking to a friend and devotee of Agathiyar who is a Chartered Accountant just moments ago, I shared what Agathiyar had told us about Udal, Uyir, and Atma some time back and how we are the Jeevatma that seeks to merge in the source or Paramatma. He simplified our understanding of the Atma. He immediately brought me back to the school days when we read about Sets and Subsets in Maths. If the Set was the Param then the Subset is the Jeeva. The Jeeva is a Subset of the Param as it shares certain elements of the parent Set. The Jeeva once it gains all the elements of the Param it itself becomes the Param. 

Source: https://www.mathsisfun.com/sets/sets-introduction.html

Ramalinga Adigal sings of God's grace in showering him the treasures and goes on to sing of the merger when the Subset takes on the elements of the Set by the grace or Arul of Arutperunjothi in the verses of his Agaval. The Agaval is a song of the Prapanjam, Grace, Praise, and Gratitude. It melts our hearts and truly transforms the listener. 

THE HOMECOMING

We come across an attempt to answer the question of the advent of diseases in a study "Origins of Major Human Infectious Diseases" by the National Institutes of Health at https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK114494/

"These results provide a framework for addressing unanswered questions about the evolution of human infectious diseases - questions not only of practical importance to physicians, and to all the rest of us as potential victims, but also of intellectual interest to historians and evolutionary biologists. This review illustrates big gaps in our understanding of the origins of even the established major infectious diseases."

This question that was never raised by us when we were kids ourselves and now as adults, as we have come to accept illnesses and diseases, seems to be important enough and has been questioned by a six-year-old. My six-year-old granddaughter after she had recovered from a bout of Hand Foot and Mouth Disease in recent weeks, had surprised her mother and us by asking her mother when did the first disease appear. Then she had asked when did the first man appear? Just like her two-year-old brother, like a sponge that absorbs lots of liquid, is picking up words from his siblings and conversations with adults around him, the eldest is keen to know more. She has set the ball rolling for I am eager to know too. This reminded me of my daughter sitting on Tavayogi's lap as a seven-year-old asking him "What was Atma?" the first time we met in 2005.

While reaching out to the internet for authentic answers, I have asked a student who graduated in this subject and is currently employed for scientific facts and a Siddha practitioner for the answers within the pages of the Siddha texts that I shall share in my future posts. 

It is interesting to note from the above research paper that,

"Native Americans resisting European colonists died of newly introduced Old World diseases than of sword and bullet wounds. Those invisible agents of New World conquest were Old World microbes to which Europeans had both some acquired immunity based on individual exposure and some genetic resistance based on population exposure over time, but to which previously unexposed Native American populations had no immunity or resistance."

Just as we are told that, "Human hunter/gatherer populations currently suffer, and presumably have suffered for millions of years, from infectious diseases similar or identical to diseases of other wild primate populations. However, the most important infectious diseases of modern food-producing human populations also include diseases that could have emerged only within the past 11,000 years, following the rise of agriculture", we read at https://www.history.com/topics/middle-ages/pandemics-timeline that, "Communicable diseases existed during humankind’s hunter-gatherer days, but the shift to agrarian life 10,000 years ago created communities that made epidemics more possible."

We read at https://en.wikipedia.org/ that,

"The first evidence of the existence of viruses came from experiments with filters that had pores small enough to retain bacteria. In 1892, Dmitri Ivanovsky used one of these filters to show that sap from a diseased tobacco plant remained infectious to healthy tobacco plants despite having been filtered. The first human virus to be identified was the yellow fever virus. In 1881, Carlos Finlay (1833–1915), a Cuban physician, first conducted and published research that indicated that mosquitoes were carrying the cause of yellow fever, a theory proved in 1900 by a commission headed by Walter Reed (1851–1902)."

From https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fmicb.2020.631736/full we see the following table 'A Timeline of the Pandemics".

Unlike science that unravels the mysteries of life, day by day and moment by moment, often correcting its earlier findings, religious heads, and spiritualists who keep vomiting the same Puranas fall short of revealing the how, and why of many of our questions. For instance, when many know the lives of saints, very rarely can they tell us what happened to them after they left their mortal frame either sitting in samadhi or stepping into the inner sanctum of temples, not to be seen again. This is deemed a merger or union with God. If so where are they now? If they are with God where is God now? Where is his residence? Where is his plane or dimension? What does God do and all those who joined him? Do they administer the day-to-day running of the universe and the worlds within them and all beings in it? 

These are questions that we hardly ponder and ask ourselves. Our belief in God ends with the granite or bronze statue and the many paintings of God. We know his residence as within the walls of the temples. And apparently, he too works 9 to 5 like us having specific hours of the day when the doors to his "office" are open and he is accessible to people. 

A rare guru who went into samadhi recently in India, Nithyanandam Swamigal, makes us question where the many saints went after their merger in a video clip that I watched recently. In an age where we do not get answers from elders and the wise, he surprised us with the answer too. He explained referring to a verse “கண்டவர் விண்டதில்லை; விண்டவர் கண்டதில்லை” He says that once we cross the thin line and step onto the other side we cannot possibly speak. As we are in his presence, and in him and vice versa he in us, as we are one with God we only see. Though we see we do not speak. If he were to make a comeback like Arnold Schwarzenegger in the "Terminator" he cannot see the place he speaks of now. Though he could speak, tell and write, he sees not.  

As I am writing this, I suddenly realize Agathiyar broke the rules to show something of that world or state that cannot possibly be seen in this world of ours. The most compassionate and loving father went through the trouble building the stage meticulously taking his time so that I and my wife could see it. But sadly just as Tavayogi pointed me to Agathiyar opening and closing his eyes in his granite statue at Agasthiyampalli and I could not see that miracle, both of us could not see it then too. Then he took a different approach and had us shut our eyes. Just as there were many things that he shared earlier but asked us to refrain from sharing further, he asked us to keep what we saw to ourselves and within the four walls of our prayer room. 

Man had placed a barrier between us and God. He has made God become inaccessible to us. He dictates when God can be seen. God can only be seen in his grandest on certain days while he is only accessible at certain hours on other days. Man like in everything else has laid the rules here too. We too are so used to having others do things for us even when it comes to something very personal like puja and prayer. We need someone to bring up our problems, needs, wants, and wishes to the Almighty. We need someone to handle the preparation and execution of rituals that reach out to the deities to bring our desires to their attention and call out for their blessings and fulfillment. 

We must understand that God resides in us. As such why are we looking towards others to grant permission and access to see him outside in the things that man created? Should not we instead see God in all his creation? As nature is closest to God, get back to nature to nurture, cherish and nourish us. Spend more time in nature. Sadly, we get lost in time at the malls or lost in the mobiles and tablets for hours. Look away from your computers, smartphones, and televisions and instead look out of your window for once. Look at that lovely full moon that is in the sky right now (This piece was drafted on the last Full moon night). Appreciate God's creation and you shall appreciate yourself. 

Since everybody these days seems to give advice, I do not want to join the foray. But it hurts and the heart bleeds when certain things take place before our own eyes. Can we stay indifferent or should we voice out? If we involve when do we know to draw the line and or to cut off or back off or end it? Or do we plunge into it and find ourselves caught in the vicious cycle and circle of life? These are questions that have always bugged me. But Agathiyar came as a savior and started and at the same time stopped many things in the nick of time. He had us move on rather than stagnate or rather become slaves to them. He had us own, use, and eventually give it up be it a thing or a process. He herded us as the shepherd would to the next field to graze the fresh, green, and newer experiences that abound there. Rather than have the stream stagnate into a pond, he broke its bunds and had us flow and join the rest of the tributaries and eventually reach the ocean of bliss or so it seems. When everyone is obsessed with reaching the ocean and not enjoying the ride, Agathiyar showed us how to live in the present and enjoy the journey. The journey indeed is the path. These days I just cannot start an action or end it. I do not plan no more. I just go with the flow as I know that he is the source of the river. Rather than being obsessed with the destination, he showed us that the bliss was in the source, pure and unadulterated. Both the destination and source are one just as Tavayogi wrote and autographed my copy of his book "Andamum Pindamum". Tavayogi identified the residence of God as being within this inner chamber of the heart. He wrote, "The journey begins and ends there". It is a journey of returning back home.

 

TIME IS RUNNING OUT

Watching Tom Hanks in the movie "Otto" and as O t t o last night reminded me of myself. It was like looking into a mirror at a grumpy old man. But the Siddhas did not sideline me instead are trying their level best to get me to let go and enjoy what remains of the remainder of my life. 

Agathiyar lectured me for an hour on anger management back then in a Nadi reading after I believe my mother made a plea to him asking so that I tone down my anger. He also told me that anger will bring a downfall to our Tavam. It would stand as an obstacle to all our efforts in yogic practices drawing us away from seeing and reaping its benefits. Ramalinga Adigal has said that the very cells shall "boil" in the heat of anger and perish.

Just quite recently he took up arms and confronted me again asking if he needed to school me again after my wife voiced out to him about my anger. But he also added later that he cannot have a lifetime's work go down the drain. He cannot have his efforts in calling me to the path and have Tavayogi mold me just go to waste. He added that the dormant energy at the base chakra that he had drawn up to the crown chakra shall fall in disgrace returning back into the dark cold room to hibernate again. 

Here is where he stands out among the many gurus. His love, and compassion, know no bounds. He has placed his bet and faith in us. He still believes that we can achieve his state. 

Similarly working on Jnana Jothiamma he explained to her the difficulty and time needed in clearing her "house" as she had been consuming meat all lifelong. He explained the need to switch to a Satvic and vegetarian diet was not for the common man and not for any other reason but as a crucial factor if one wanted to merge in the Light. All the cells have to be purified for the transformation from Asudha or impure to Suddha or pure and further to the Pranava, Gnana, and Oli degam or bodies to take place.

When everyone is fighting over and arguing if Agathiyar was a six-footer or a dwarf, if there were more than one Agathiyar living over a period of time as many pundits have placed him according to Tavayogi, Agathiyar shows us that he is the very Prapanjam and had us give away his statue to another devotee bringing an end to us holding on to form and name at AVM today.

I am 64 this year. I cannot be holding on to life for long as the day shall come when I shall not wake up to see another day. Watching the movie "Interstellar" and "Otto" we realize that the family comes within our vision as we breathe our last. The past is played before our eyes. I guess the family makes the greatest impact on us during our lifetimes. So what do we do then? We take care of them well. Leave no stone unturned before we leave.

TRUE HAPPINESS

I was thinking of calling it a day last Thursday, 20 July 2023. I wrote "Although he has stopped all the activities, as of today he still wants me to blog though. If I had been writing about my travels with my gurus in physical form and whatever little I knew of Agathiyar from experience, he told me to stop writing about him and to share the experiences, that of the changes that were going on within me. There might come a day when he might ask me to call it off too, having me call it a day. The Siddhas are indeed mysterious."

But the messages just kept coming, getting me to keep on writing. Twelve posts have been written since then. You know what gives us the greatest joy. When we come to understand things that are not apparent. That is enlightenment. That is attaining Jothi. That is attaining Nirvana. When you rejoice in the veils drawn aside and everything is crystal clear. When ignorance leaves us and all knowledge is accessible at the touch of a button as they say. When the darkness leaves and is replaced by light. This light is the Jothi that is sought after. 

When I questioned Tavayogi's motive in building an ashram cum temple, as he used to "lecture" us on seeking the path of Gnana and not remaining in Bakthi, he replied that it was not for him but for others who are yet to step onto the path. Speaking to Mahindren who came over just moments ago, he too agreed to the need to continue writing.

It has been a wonderful journey indeed. Just days ago a devotee asked me how I spend my time as there is no puja as Agathiyar's statue has left AVM for another devotee's home. Agathiyar too cheekily asked me how it felt to be doing nothing and if I was enjoying it, சும்ம இருக்கும் சுகத்தை அனுபவிக்கிறாயா?  These days there is joy and bliss in doing nothing. 

When we have shed the layers of veils of ignorance, shed the layers of "clothing" that we had worn all this while that maketh us, and have severed our attachment to things, enjoying them while it is there and not being sad about losing them, we settle in our true nature. 

I suppose this state is that of Guru Dhakshanamurthy who sits in silence. There is no discourse, no Satsang, no activity of any kind. Just being in the moment. I believe this state of realization was what Bhagawan Ramana meant by "Your real nature is happiness."

FUN WITH THE KIDS

My grandchildren can spend hours assembling and building things using the toy blocks. Just the other day, when I was with my three-year-old granddaughter, she suddenly went behind the door telling me not to watch as she had to defecate. Children when they have to go are known to look for a spot hidden from others' sight to defacate. As she was playing with her toy blocks at that time she asked me to bring them over to where she was seated to continue her play. I did as requested and exited from the room giving her the privacy they needed. After some time I went back to check on her. But she told me that she wasn't done. After some moments I asked her if I should call her mother to wash up. She replied that she was not finished. I then asked her just like the donkey kept asking Shrek "Are we there yet?" if she had arrived at Semenyih where she stayed. She gave me an immediate answer without any expression, still minding her toys that made me laugh all the way downstairs to share with my wife and daughter. She had replied that she had only arrived at Balakong which was my place. It was just moments before that that we were going through the Body Book where we traced the path food took and spoke about digestion and elimination. 

This same kid once asked my wife what I was doing. My wife replied to her that I was on the blog. She immediately asked my wife to call me over and play block with her. Her elder sister who is six years of age complains that I am spending less time with them. So when I asked her if she was reading any of the stuff, she replies that she cannot read in Carl Sagan's words "the funny dark squiggles" on these pages. 

It is indeed fun to listen to them as they pick up words and begin to use them in their daily conversations with us and others.