GO WITH THE FLOW

My friend wrote: 

The verse AnDavan aaTchiyil adharmamey illai is therefore a Pati-level statement. It is not addressed to the Pasu navigating the difficult choices of daily life. It is addressed to the sincere seeker who — having walked the path of Dharma with full sincerity, full effort, and full surrender — has arrived at a moment of deep stillness, and is now ready to receive the larger truth: That even their own failures — their own moments of Adharma, their own darkest hours — were held all along within Shiva’s love, and were never, not for a single moment, outside His grace.

I understood that one has to walk the mile and arrive at the state in good time, where all shall be revealed. Just as at ground level, one has a limited vision of things as opposed to one taking a flight, where one takes in a bigger view, the Pasu, which "navigates the difficult choices of daily life," accepting everything, and as Lao Tzu says, "Go with the Flow" is brought to eventually settle in peace, and comes to understand the Pati's or Shiva's love. I believe this is what Agathiyar, after having me come to Advaita, leaving behind all that was taught to me and that I did in Dvaita, meant in asking me to know the Atma or Pasu and come to know Sivam or Pati.

He wrote that this understanding "is given — as all the deepest teachings of Saiva Siddhantam are given — not to the intellect, but to the heart that has been sufficiently broken open by sincere practice, genuine love, and the boundless grace of the Guru."

I now understand the reason for the countless sufferings that the Pasu or souls I knew back then initially went through, seeking to know the reasons for their sufferings. I now understand the reason for the Siddhas to bring on pain and agony after taking their hands, and the countless tests that they put us through, just to break us. As Agathiyar says, he shall bring the "tough nuts to crack" to AVM to crack them open, though Agathiyar's actions might initially appear harsh and unwarranted, just as Agathiyar took the cane and apprehended me, asking me to drop my anger, for otherwise all his efforts and years of work on me would go to waste, one shall eventually come to understand that it was "genuine love and the boundless grace of the Guru" that was behind it all. Though initially I was taken aback seeing the way he handled these gentle folks, I understand now that he was working on their souls rather than their individual personalities. 

In walking the Siddha path, we watch with awe and wonder, at least that is what I do, as they paint the wall before us in a multitude of vibrant colors, dazzling us and causing us to freeze in our steps. 

After I returned from my maiden pilgrimage to India in 2003, having met my guru, Supramania Swami at Tiruvannamalai, and returned to India again in 2005, Swami brought his guru, Yogi Ramsuratkumar, from his Samadhi to sit and sing his name with us at Swami's kudil. He narrated the story of how the Yogi appeared at his door one night after his Samadhi and passed him a painting of his for a keepsake and disappeared into the night. After his Samadhi, Swami too came in a subtle form, that of the aroma of tobacco, and made me realize his presence when I had a missed call from his number. As I was seeking assurance, I had another missed call a couple of days later as I was sharing the story with my nephew over the phone. Later that weekend, Agathiyar, in a Nadi reading, spoke about a miracle that took place in my home, having me recall this happening. Indeed, if Agathiyar showed me miracles in the presence of Supramania Swami and as I traveled with Tavayogi back then, and showed more miracles after I returned from India in 2005, these miracles continue to this day. 

Agathiyar, who initially made a brief stop on his way to either Kailash or Pothigai to take a rest in my home, which later became a garden or Vanam, took on the name Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) after he arrived as a bronze statue and soon joined us in the rituals. Later, he took charge of these rituals, and had me teach Mahin and had Mahin teach others Yoga, bringing my home to the state of a Tapovanam. Finally, when he began to dispense Gnanam, it became Gnana Kottam. I can only stand back in awe and wonder, seeing this transition from a family home to a temple. If Lord Muruga, in a Nadi reading in 2018, told me that my home was a temple, Agathiyar, in February of this year, through a Nadi reading, spoke about the home being a Virutcham, a wish-fulfilling tree, and his Peedham, Guru Muni Peedham, and a Karunai Illam, a Home of Compassion. 

எங்களை தினமும் தொழுது தெளிவு தேற்றம் ஏகாந்த நிலை கண்ட மைந்தன் நீதான். மங்களங்கள் தன் இல்லில் நாளும் கண்டேன். மகத்துவ சக்தி கொண்ட இல்லம் அப்பா. இல்லமதில் என் ஆசி கருணை எல்லாம் ஏற்றமுடன் நீ காண வழி வகுத்தேன். இல்லமதில் எல்லை இல்லா அருளும் ஆசி ஏக்கமில்லா மாந்தர் வாழ கருணைக்  கோட்டம். கோட்டத்தில் அடைக்கலம் புகுந்தோம் நாங்கள். ஆட்சியாய் வாசம் செய்வோம் உன் இல்லில் தான். ஆனந்தம் பேரானந்தம் உந்தன் இல்லம். உன் இல்லம் என்  இல்லம். வினைப்போக்கும் குருமுனி பீடம். வித்தை எல்லாம் கற்றுவிக்கும் விருட்சம் அப்பா. அப்பனின் அன்னையின் ஆசி நிறைந்து ஆறுமுகன் கருணைப் பார்வை நிறைந்து மூப்பான நிலை அடைய வைக்கும் இல்லம். முக்திக்கும் சித்திக்கும் பஞ்சம் ஏது பஞ்சமில்லா ஞான வேட்கை தணியும் அப்பா. 

Its translation is as follows.

"Through your daily worship of the Siddhas, you have gained clarity. We saw joy and bliss prevail daily in your home. It is a powerhouse. I have provided for my blessings and compassion to all who step within your home. Your home is a compassionate home, a Karunai Illam. We have sought refuge and come to stay in your home. Joy and bliss prevail in your home. Your home is my Peedham, Guru Muni Peedham, a Virutcham, a wish-fulfilling tree, and a Karunai Illam, a Home of Compassion. All practices shall be made available here. Lord Siva, Parvathi, and Lord Muruga shall bless all. Mukti and Siddhi shall be in abundance. The hunger and thirst for Gnanam shall be relieved here."

If Supramania Swami had previously brought his guru to chant with us, Yogi Ramsuratkumar came through a devotee, bringing my guru, Supramania Swami, with him, during Sivarathri of 2024. He identified himself as the Beggar. As the songs of Sadhu Om were playing in the background, the Yogi asked to replay these songs as he kept listening to them. 

During the following year, the Sivarathri of 2025, held in Mahendran's home, Bhagawan Ramana came when these same songs were played. He identified himself and blessed us all. 

This Sivarathri of 2026, if Agathiyar came earlier, as I played Adi Sankara's "Bhaja Govindam", Lord Siva came during the last phase of the Puja, asking me to play a song for him too. He listened and asked me to wake up the kids and others who had dozed off, and blessed us all. This was later confirmed in the Nadi reading. 

"Lord Siva has come down here. We played our divine game, and Lila here. Blessed are those who stayed for Sivarathri. They saw miracles and bliss that night."

பரமசிவன் இரங்கி வந்து மகிழ்ந்த இல்லம். கொஞ்சி விளையாடியே மகிழ்ந்தோம் நாங்கள். அங்கு பல அற்புதங்கள் அதிசயங்கள் ஆனந்த நிலை அடைந்தார் சீடர் மாந்தர் பலர். ஓங்கியே சக்தி ஆசி ஓங்கி ஒளியும் ஓங்கி விதவிதமாய் போற்றி பூசை மகிழ்ச்சி. 

What can one do except stand back and watch in awe and wonder? 

Can awe be measured? Can wonder be calibrated? Dolby says it can. 

I guess after they watch me going about, pretty much occupied with enhancing my system, fine-tuning it, and taking a step back to listen, only to tinker with the settings on the amplifier again, and physically change the placement of the speakers and my seat and central listening positions, the Siddhas, gods, and gurus were inspired by the sound and asked me to play songs on my 5.1 sound system each time they come. 

On a lighter note, Sir David Attenborough holds to what Kumar Samy Aiya, patron of the Agathiyar temple in Anuvavi, told me when I replied that I was not going places after I caught hold of Agathiyar. He said to me, "Hold on to one, Hold firm, and Hold till the end." Similarly, Sir David Attenborough has spent all his life studying nature and being in their midst. A life well lived. Prapanjam, the Universe has honored him with a long, memorable life.

IT IS GOD'S WILL 2

I had written about God's Will in the last posts and mentioned that "If there is one thing that I still cannot comprehend, it is the verse in the above song that states there is no Adharma in God's governance - AnDavan aaTchiyil adharmamey illai enDru, when all the sacred texts speak about virtues, dividing them into Dharma and Adharma, and tell us to take up the former and not fall for the latter."

I posed this to a friend and reader, asking if he could enlighten me. He replied swiftly as follows.

Dear Aiyya, You are like a Guru to me. I will contemplate your question and answer humbly from whatever little I know. 

I have been sitting with this — AnDavan aaTchiyil adharmamey illai — turning it slowly in contemplation. What follows is only my humble understanding, drawn from the ultimate source. If anything here is wrong, the fault is entirely mine and mine alone — not the teachings, not the lineage, not the Guru.

Allow me to attempt this through the lens of Saiva Siddhantam and the 36 Tattwas, which I have had the grace to touch, however lightly.

Opening

The sun does not follow the rule “illuminate the day.” It simply shines. Darkness is not the sun’s failure — it is the temporary condition of a surface that has turned away from the light. So too, Adharma is not a failure of Shiva’s governance. It is the temporary condition of a soul turned away from its own divine nature — a turning that Shiva, in His boundless patience, is already in the process of gently, persistently, and lovingly reversing.

From within our human experience, Adharma is real — painfully and consequentially real. But in the governance of Andavan — viewed from the level of the Suddha Tattwas — there is no Adharma, because there is nothing that falls outside His grace. There is no soul He has abandoned. There is no action whose consequence He has not already woven into the redemptive curriculum of Niyati and Kaala. There is no darkness that His light has not already surrounded.

Mupporul — Pati, Pasu, Pasam: The Final Clarity

Saiva Siddhantam’s master-framework of Pati, Pasu, and Pasam resolves this question with perfect elegance.

Pati — Shiva — is characterised by eight absolute attributes (En Gunataan), among them Sarvagjnatva (omniscience), Ananta Sakti (boundless grace), and Ananta Anandam (infinite bliss). He is not a governor who merely reacts to events from the outside. He is the very ground from which all events arise and into which all events return. Dharma and Adharma both occur within His being — the way waves both rise and fall within the ocean, without ever disturbing the ocean’s own nature.

Pasu — the bound soul — experiences Dharma and Adharma as lived realities within the 36 Tattwas. For the Pasu, this distinction is absolutely real and absolutely consequential. The Pasu must choose Dharma. The Pasu must walk the path sincerely. The Pasu must purify the Chitta, govern the Karmendriyas, and progressively align itself with the Suddha Tattwas. None of this can be bypassed — not by philosophy, not by spiritual cleverness, not by beautiful words.

Pasam — the bonds of Anavam, Karma, and Maya — contains within it the entire field of Adharma as the Pasu experiences it. Yet even the Pasam, in Saiva Siddhantam, is not ultimately opposed to Shiva. It is the very material through which Shiva works. The Pancha Kanchukas — the five limiting sheaths — are not our enemies. They are compassionate constraints, like the walls of a school, that keep the wandering soul focused on the one curriculum that truly matters: its own liberation.

The verse AnDavan aaTchiyil adharmamey illai is therefore a Pati-level statement. It is not addressed to the Pasu navigating the difficult choices of daily life. It is addressed to the sincere seeker who — having walked the path of Dharma with full sincerity, full effort, and full surrender — has arrived at a moment of deep stillness, and is now ready to receive the larger truth:

That even their own failures — their own moments of Adharma, their own darkest hours — were held all along within Shiva’s love, and were never, not for a single moment, outside His grace.

This is not a permission to act Adharmatically. It is a revelation about the nature of the One who governs. And it is given — as all the deepest teachings of Saiva Siddhantam are given — not to the intellect, but to the heart that has been sufficiently broken open by sincere practice, genuine love, and the boundless grace of the Guru.

Closing — For Those of Limited Understanding, like Myself

Anbe Shivam.

The 36 Tattwas, from Prithvi to Para Nada, tell one unbroken story.

At the base, the Pasu struggles within Prakriti Maya — and here, Dharma and Adharma are the living operating instructions for the soul’s survival and evolution. They must be taken seriously.

In the middle, Niyati and Kaala — Shiva’s instruments of cosmic justice and time — ensure that even the consequences of Adharma are not wasted. Every stumble, every fall, every wrong turn is quietly, precisely, and compassionately being folded into the curriculum of liberation.

And at the summit, in the five Suddha Tattwas, there is only Love.

In Love’s governance — nothing is wasted.

No soul is abandoned. No darkness falls outside the reach of His light.

AnDavan aaTchiyil adharmamey illai — not because nothing goes wrong, but because nothing that goes wrong ever leaves His hands.

This is Saiva Siddhantam. This is Anbe Shivam.

Sivaayanama.

He answered the questions and doubts I had that I posted in the last post.

It is a revelation about the nature of the One who governs. And it is given — as all the deepest teachings of Saiva Siddhantam are given — not to the intellect, but to the heart that has been sufficiently broken open by sincere practice, genuine love, and the boundless grace of the Guru.

That even their own failures — their own moments of Adharma, their own darkest hours — were held all along within Shiva’s love, and were never, not for a single moment, outside His grace. 

Niyati and Kaala — Shiva’s instruments of cosmic justice and time — ensure that even the consequences of Adharma are not wasted. Every stumble, every fall, every wrong turn is quietly, precisely, and compassionately being folded into the curriculum of liberation.

When I thanked him for taking the time to put together this piece and bring clarity to me, he had this to say with much humbleness.

Your kind words have left me quietly overwhelmed and immediately aware that I must place them back where they truly belong. Whatever clarity appeared in that answer was not mine. I am quite certain of this. These words did not arise from my own understanding; they arose through the small opening that the teachings I have been blessed to receive have been patiently carving in this thick-walled heart. If there was any beauty in what was written, it was only because the light of the tradition found a brief crack to pass through.

The understanding belongs to the lineage. The words belong to Shiva. This unworthy student only held the pen, and even that, only by His grace. If anything in that answer touched something true, it is because sincere souls like yourself have been walking this path with such love and such depth, and those of us who walk behind you benefit simply from the fragrance left on the road.

I remain only a grateful and still-stumbling student, knowing just enough now to know how little I know and how vast and luminous the territory ahead truly is.

All that is beautiful in it — En Ayyane — is His alone. Always His alone.

Sivaayanama

IT IS GOD'S WILL

As a bachelor, and later in walking the path of the Siddhas, I saw many who were God-fearing and served in various capacities in temples around me suffer. I could not understand back then, as the books I read told me God was all merciful, kind, compassionate, and loving. It just did not tally. A relative died on the spot when she was knocked down by a car right in front of a temple where she had prayed just moments ago. A devotee who served the deities at a temple saw his wife throw up, though it is normal in pregnancy, but it was extreme and went on for months on end in her case. Later, the deity, coming through a devotee, took responsibility for causing her the agony, stating certain reasons. I just could not comprehend or accept. It made me angry. Lord Siva, seeing my confusion and anger, came in a dream and asked me to keep my questions and doubts for a later date. I did just that, leaving behind home worship, temple visits, and reading for some 14 years. Then, after this long period of abstinence, Agathiyar, in calling me to a Nadi reading, spoke about karma, the law of cause and effect. Only then did I understand why it all had to take place. He revealed mine, too, and had me carry out remedies, too. 

Traveling this path, the Siddhas, too, like the deities back then, took responsibility for causing hurt. If Agathiyar told me in 2012 that the pain I endured in my lower back for some 2 1/2 years was triggered by the opening of the Muladhara chakra, Lord Muruga told me in another Nadi reading that the pain recurred in 2018 because it was to have me stay put in one place. Similarly, a devotee in his golden age slipped and fell in his house. Agathiyar told him that it was his doing so that he would stay home. Agathiyar had my wife stay away for about six months, having her attend to her ailing mother in her hometown, telling me it was his doing. He had a couple go through a divorce, admitting that it was his doing. Does this ring a bell? When I set out to learn more about the Siddhas after taking up the call, many cautioned me that the Siddhas would disrupt relationships, marriages, and families. I doubted them, asking how they could be so unkind. 

So it seems there is a reason for all things to take place. If it was not our past karma, it is a desire of another in a past birth that we have to see through, too, like my daughter wanted us to be her parents in this birth, too. We came to appease her soul. If it is not a desire of another that we have to see through, it is a desire of the Siddhas, deities, and Gods, for Agathiyar told me that he had on several occasions pushed me into certain circumstances and had me do wrongful and shameful things. He wanted me to have those experiences too. 

If Agathiyar had a hand in bringing on sufferings in our lives, he brings on joy and laughter too. He had me carry out our 60th wedding anniversary some time back, with him coming as the Purohit! If many only remember the darkest moments forgeting the good times and forgetting to pay gratitude and homage to the Siddhas and deities, many equally set out to fulfill their vows as promised when the things they asked for materialize. 

So what is ours then to brag about? This brings us to Sadhu Om's songs on Bhagawan Ramana's teachings that tell us that it is all His doing. It is God's will that we carry out as we play a part in His Lila or game. 

If there is one thing that I still cannot comprehend, it is the verse in the above song that states there is no Adharma in God's governance - "AnDavan aaTchiyil adharmamey illai enDru", when all the sacred texts speak about virtues, dividing them into acts of Dharma and Adharma, and tell us to take up the former and not fall for the latter. 

I guess born in the Kumbha Raasi, just as the Devas and Asuras churned the oceans, I keep churning my mind for answers too. 

BLISS

An author of several books messaged me saying she wanted to write about Agathiyar. I told her to come to the worship of the Siddhas first before venturing to write about him, for otherwise it shall only be based on previous research papers written by others, the myths and mythology that have been carried down for ages, and hearsay. Agathiyar, in calling me to the path, had me come to the worship of the Siddhas instead of settling for reading about them, speaking about them, etc. Hence, I came to know the Siddhas.

There is the seeker and aspirant who has made it to the end, and he merges in the bliss. He does not come back into society anymore. Then there is he who comes back to share the bliss with others on the other side of the wall. Then there are those who observe the blissful happenings from a distance and provide a visual narrative, but do not experience the bliss themselves. I guess most of us fall in the last category. Most of us speak and preach without the experience. A lad came around telling me that his parents were in the Siddha path. Asking if they did worship the Siddhas, he replied in the negative and answered that they read a lot about the Siddhas. 

This is the reason the Siddhas give us the experiences. Equipped with this, we can take on the seekers who come along the path, and their hunger to know more about these Siddhas, for we have walked the path. He then is indeed the beacon, the guide, the light, and the guru. He brings us to taste the bliss. Eventually, we fall in love with the path, the way, and the teachings. We begin to take it up too. If human birth is rare and the yearning to know is even rarer, I would say finding such a guru is even more rare. Blessed are those who are given a taste of this bliss. Blessed are those who get a piece of the cake and get to keep it.

I believe I am blessed. As such, my conversation with others is always about my gurus Supramania Swami, Tavayogi, and Agathiyar.  My conversation with others is always about the many miracles that were shown and took place. My conversation with others is always about the blissful moments that I experience in walking the path. Tavayogi always says that we should try to prolong these moments. Eventually, we arrive at a continuous state of bliss. We are then the very bliss. We become it.

A PIECE FROM A READER

A friend and a reader read my piece, "The Tools", and wrote a beautiful piece elaborating further according to his understanding. He writes beautifully. I had asked that he start writing a blog too, for his command of the English language and his in-depth knowledge of religious and spiritual subjects are appealing. This piece of his could be the start of more writings and greater pieces to come our way.

I share his writing with readers here. 

THE TOOLS

Siddha Heartbeat

Published: Monday, 25 May 2025

“But seeking God is very personal. As such, can anyone truly show us the way, the path, the method, and the means to it? Can anyone claim to be an authority on religious and spiritual matters? Everyone is walking the path and journeying towards it, be it the layman or the guru, for Ramalinga Adigal, in charting the many phases, speaks of its numerous stages. Where do we stand in this spiritual ladder? How long is the journey going to take us to reach the top? It all begins with faith and belief first, and taking little baby steps, not forgetting the effort and practice needed to reach there. Rest assured, we shall see the results in good time.”

Indeed. And what a quietly liberating truth that is.

Because if seeking God is personal — truly personal — then there is no single corridor we must all squeeze through. Saiva Siddhantam reminds us that the soul — the Pasu — is not uniform in its bondage or its readiness. Each soul carries its own weight of Anava — that primal sense of smallness and separateness — wound tightly around it across countless lifetimes. The loosening of that knot is not a single event. It is a long, patient unraveling, unique to each soul, overseen by Shiva alone in His infinite compassion.

Can anyone claim authority on such matters? Perhaps the honest answer is: only partially, and only humbly. The Guru in the Saiva Siddhanta tradition is not merely a teacher — he is the very form through which Pati, the Lord, extends His grace downward toward the bound soul. And yet even the Guru does not walk for us. Tirumular, in the Tirumantiram, makes this beautifully clear:

 

ஆசாரி யாரென்று கேட்கின்றோம் நாமே —

தேசாந்தி ரத்துள் சிவனருள் பெற்றோரே

Ācāri yārenʻru kēṭkinṛōṃ nāmē —

Tēsānti rattṫuḷ civaṉaruḷ peṛṛōrē

“Who is the true Acharya, we ask —

He who, in this wide world, has received the grace of Shiva.”

— Tirumular, Tirumantiram

 

The teacher points. The grace descends. But the soul must turn — must make itself available. Authority in spiritual life belongs ultimately not to the human vessel, but to the Shakti moving through it.

And so everyone walks. The layman fumbling through daily life, finding God in unexpected moments of stillness. The guru, disciplined and devoted, still bowing before something immeasurably larger than himself. Ramalinga Adigal, in his Thiruvarutpa, did not speak of one stage or two — he charted the Arutperum Jyothi, the vast ocean of Grace-Light, as something approached gradually, through ever-deepening surrender. The Suddha Avastha — the state of purified soul-consciousness — is not seized. It is grown into, the way a seed grows into a tree: invisibly, steadily, in the dark.

Where do we stand on this ladder? Saiva Siddhantam speaks of the soul moving through Kevala Avastha — bound and unaware, shrouded in Anava Malam — into Sakala Avastha, where the soul engages with the world and its experiences become the very classroom of liberation. Most of us live here, in the Sakala — and that is not a failure. It is where the work happens. It is where Charya, Kriya, Yoga, and Jnana — the four-fold path — slowly, faithfully, do their purifying work upon us.

How long will it take? The Siddhanta does not promise a timeline. It promises something better — that Shiva’s grace, Shaktinipata, will descend at the moment of the soul’s ripeness: not a moment before, not a moment after. Our practice does not earn that grace — nothing can earn what is freely given. But practice prepares the vessel. It thins the walls. It makes us more permeable to what is always already pouring toward us.

It begins with faith and belief — Shraddha — not certainty, but the willingness to keep showing up before the altar even when the heart feels dry. Baby steps, yes. The Charya path begins simply: service, ritual, presence. No grand illuminations required at the start. Meykandar in the Sivagnana Botham reminds us that the soul cannot know itself or Shiva through intellect alone — it must be touched, turned, and transformed from within:

 

அறிவித்தான் றானே அறிவாய் அறிவித்து

Aṛivittān ṛānē aṛivāy aṛivittu

“He Himself, as pure Awareness, causes the soul to know.”

— Meykandar, Sivagnana Botham

 

The effort, the practice, the showing up even on days we feel nothing — none of it is wasted. In the Saiva vision, every sincere act of seeking is seen by Shiva. The Pasa — the bonds — weaken not all at once, but grain by grain, through every prayer offered, every ego quietly laid down, every moment of genuine surrender.

Rest assured, the results will come. The soul that persists will find, one day, that the silence it once found empty has become full. That the God it once sought outside has been recognized within. That what began as effort has become effortless love — Anbu — which Thirumoolar in the Tirumantiram calls the very substance of the path:

 

அன்பே சிவம்

Aṉbē Sivam

“Love itself is Shiva.”

— Thirumoolar, Tirumantiram

 

We are all on our way — the layman, the seeker, the guru — each carrying our particular weight of Malam, each receiving our particular measure of grace, each being worked upon by the same silent, tireless, infinitely patient Pati.

Let us keep walking — faithfully, humbly, and with love.

 

அருட்பெரும் ஜ்யோதி. அருட்பெரும் ஜ்யோதி. தனிபெரும் கருணை அருட்பெரும் ஜ்யோதி.

Arutperum Jyothi. Arutperum Jyothi. Thaniperum Karunai Arutperum Jyothi.

COMING TO WORSHIP THE GURU

If previously I had only known the deities whom we traditionally worshipped, which I took up following my parents, it was Paramahansa Yogananda's Autobiography of a Yogi that introduced me to gurus. I received a copy of this book from an officer in the department who had opted out of the Government service to become a monk at Yogananda's Ranchi Ashram in India in 1994. It was truly an interesting read and an eye-opener. Just as I was interested in reading, listening, and knowing the relationship between the master and his disciple, years later, during my days of mentorship with my gurus, Supramania Swami and Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal, I began to compile and write a book on the wonderful relationship between the masters and their disciples, and uploaded it online at https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zrx_4OZnF7ss8754vh6W6r5afD6P_Sew/view?usp=sharing

besides writing about my experiences in meeting my gurus and sitting at their feet on my former websites and this blog postings. 

These are only some stories of gurus and their disciples that I came across. There are countless others and their stories not yet told. The right person has to come by to reveal them to the public.

In an online article at https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/entertainment/tamil/movies/news/rajinikanths-spiritual-side-a-look-into-the-jailer-2-stars-spirituality-as-he-keeps-it-above-name-fame-and-money/articleshow/131345345.cms

we come to read how the famed actor Rajinikanth came to worship his guru.

During a very difficult time in his young days, Rajinikanth once thought about ending his life, as the actor recalled during a musical event in Singapore in 1992, according to Cinema Express.

But something unexpected changed his mind. He saw a painting of a holy saint sitting with people around him and doing puja. The picture stayed in his heart even after he left that place. That same night, Rajinikanth saw the same saint in his dream. The old saint, with a long white beard, was sitting near a river and calling him. Rajinikanth later said that in the dream, he did not swim across the river; he simply ran on the water to reach him.

The next day, when he asked about the saint, he learned that it was Sri Raghavendra. Rajinikanth believed that moment changed his life and started his deep spiritual journey.

Rajinikanth later took on the role of Sri Raghavendra in a movie about the life and times of the saint. This movie was so captivating that my brother-in-law, Sundara Arumugam Aiya, took up the worship of Sri Raghavendra after watching it. He came to build the Jegathguru Sri Raghavendra Mritiga Brindavanam Kinta in Ipoh in later years. He has since passed on. He shall be remembered on 4 June as the family comes together in prayer. 

CHARITY

Maya comes in many disguises. I had always thought that we tend to carry the false notion and believe that we are superior to all others who have yet to become "religious" or "spiritual", adding weight to our already existing ego. My wife thought that we were becoming addicted to and "high" in serving the poor and unfortunate. Mahindren pointed out that we had, in fact, begun to pray that there were people, poor and hungry, on the streets, waiting to receive the groceries and cooked food we had bought and prepared for them, respectively. It is indeed sad that we have begun to wish for the continued existence of the poor and unfortunate, so that we can do our part in charity and serve them, thus earning some merits and good karma. 

Days ago, I came across the sad state of matters with regard to the once honorable act of doing charity, which we saw, experienced, and realized, before Agathiyar ended it, shared in a local daily at https://www.thestar.com.my/metro/metro-news/2026/05/27/free-meals-creating-waste-problems. Excerpts from the article are as follows.

Free meals are creating waste problems.

According to "several homeless folk,"... "they were able to eat up to 12 times a day, thanks to meals distributed by generous individuals, charitable groups, and religious organisations at various locations around George Town in Penang. It has been observed that during weekends and major festivals, as many as seven or eight groups hand out food, around noon, with many homeless folk collecting multiple meal packs." 

"However, the lack of coordination has led to food wastage and cleanliness issues,".... "Some recipients have been spotted discarding meals by the roadside after finding the food unappetizing or not to their taste.".... "In some cases, food waste is dumped on the ground instead of being disposed of properly."...... "Others take several portions but consume only their preferred dishes or meat, leaving rice and other items uneaten.".... "Their careless behaviour contributes to pollution while attracting crows, pigeons and rats."...."...the area was often left littered afterward." 

This news report has captured exactly what we encountered and saw in the streets of Kuala Lumpur, too, as we from Thondu Seivom and Amudha Surabhi, the charity wing of AVM, started feeding the homeless many years back. 

Then we saw food distributed by other groups go to waste too, during religious and festive events held on temple grounds. 

These ugly sides to a virtuous deed defeat the very purpose of giving out free food and doing charity. 

I guess Agathiyar had us carry it out to have us gain the experience, too, and later brought it to a halt and had us move on to doing other things.

AVM BHAJAN

 

ATTAINING THE STATE OF SIVAM

Sariyai

I have been worshipping all my life, until Lord Siva, in an attempt to cool me down, came in a dream and asked me to take a break from my home puja, temple visits, and readings for some 14 years between 1988 and 2002. Then the call to come to the worship of the Siddhas came through the Nadi in 2002. Calling me to the path, Agathiyar laid the slabs, paving the way in walking his path. Continuing the tradition of Sariyai now, after a long lapse, I chanted a long list of names of the Siddhas and sang their praises in addition to the original lists of deities.

Kriyai

Agathiyar then sends Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar Ashram to Malaysia in 2005 to preach the path of the Siddhas. We meet, and he officially initiates me into the path, nurtures and molds me, by breaking me first and fixing me later. By having me carry out rituals such as the lighting of the sacred fire, the Homam, Tavayogi, and Agathiyar brought me to Kriya. While Tavayogi told me to do it to appease Mother Earth and Nature and save us from her wrath, Agathiyar came later in the Nadi to convince me that I was not doing it for myself but for the good of all, the Prapanjam. They had connected me to Prapanjam. In later years, Ramalinga Adigal, coming through devotees, was to help us reach out to her. In doing it deligently and consciously, this ritual drew the bridge down for the Siddhas to come down and sit among us. It was only when he had a family come over to my home and sit in on this ritual, recently, that Agathiyar showed me and had me realize that we could burn our karma in its fire, hence wiping out what was fated, and draw up a new destiny. He made me realize why Tavayogi had prepared 108 of such ritual pits and had each family follow the ritual on his ashram ground back then, and named the event as Sarva Dosa Nivarana Maha Yagam, the Yagam that was to clear all Dosas and Karma and bring relief.

Yogam

In 2007, Tavayogi officially introduced me to Yoga by demonstrating several Asanas and Pranayama techniques to several others and me. This practice, in bringing in a surge of Prana, connected me to the Prapanjam. And, unknown to me, it brought immediate transformation to my body and mind. It was only in later years that Agathiyar, in the Nadi, in revealing the reason for the unexplained, intense, and excruciating pain in my lower back that I had to live with, revealed that the practice had opened the Muladhara chakra. In 2022, just as Tavayogi had said that our efforts are only till the Svadishtana, Agathiyar helped release the pent-up energy that had ponded at the Svadhistana, to move swiftly within the next couple of days to reach Sahasrara, where the blooming of the 1000-petalled lotus took place. I touched bliss.

Coming as a bronze statue in 2010, which he asked to commission and be made in Swamimalai, Agathiyar has me do an Abhisegam or libation to his statue, as an extension of Kriyai. The day after his arrival, as we gathered family and friends to give life to the otherwise inert statue by chanting his name 100,000 times, as directed in the Nadi, Agathiyar came within me while my soul entered the statue. Years later, in 2013, he opened his eyes in his statue to look at us, and for all to see, showing us that he was pretty much alive in the statue. Bringing youths to my home to watch and participate in our home puja the same year, he expanded the worship, bringing it into the corridors of these temples, where we lit lamps and carried out Abhisegam and Homam. Bringing us to carry out charity in the children's homes, the old folks homes, the streets, and the homes of the poor and unfortunate, he mellowed us, bringing compassion and love to blossom in our hearts and bosoms, too. Through devotion and service, cooperation, and goodwill, we made great strides, proudly and cheerfully walking the path.

In 2016, not knowing that it was to be the finale, we brought Agathiyar's statue into the homes of devotees who invited the visiting Tavayogi and Mataji. Then, just before ego and pride could get into our heads, Agathiyar had me bring the shutters down, hence bringing a halt to puja and charity in 2019. In initiating the move to do so, he made me let go of my association and attachment with the AVM group that had grown and flourished and was at its peak of activities. While some were confused, others continued with their home puja. As for me, I was asked to go within.

In 2024, Agathiyar, wanting to test me to see if I was willing to let go of my attachment to his statue, too, asked to leave my home and had me bring his statue into the homes of several devotees. I did as told, letting go of my association and attachment to his statue. Having tested me, he returned to AVM, bringing LobaMa with him also as a bronze statue that was sponsored and worshiped by a devotee. Subsequently, he held the 60th wedding anniversary for my wife and me to prove the critics, who held the opinion that the Siddhas would break up marriages and move them to become hermits, wrong.

Gnanam

Then Agathiyar had me even let go of him too, asking for how else could we and would we be one. He implied that we were one, hence bringing me out of Dvaita or Bakti or devotion, just as Tavayogi had called for, into Advaita or Oneness.

He then told me to know my Atma or Soul and to know Sivam, the Source.

As I flipped through Yogi SAA Ramaiah's book "Babaji Gita" moments ago, Shuddhananda Bharati, in his preface to the book, sums up this transformation from man to Sivam.

Human birth is rare. It is even more rare for a man to become pure, come to know himself and his creator, move away from suffering, and come to the state of Sat Chit Ananda. This state of Sat Chit Ananda is Sivam indeed.

மனிதப் பிறவி மிகவும் அரிது. மனிதன் புனிதனாகித் தன்னை அறிந்து தலைவனை அறிந்து துன்பம் துறந்து தூய இன்ப நிலை பெறுதல் மிகவும் அரிது. தூய இன்ப நிலையே சிவம்.

I have arrived at the destination, or rather, I have come to settle in my home, in the source.

THE TOOLS

Just as we expect to gain something from either a venture, investment, a practice, or in doing something in the material world, so too, coming to the religious and spiritual, we look towards some gain, change, or result. Rare are those who come for the sake of God.

Often it has to be immediate. We want everything served on a silver plate. We want everything to fall from the sky. We want everything without effort. We want everything free. 

Once gained, everything then becomes an addiction for us, just as we are addicted to tea and coffee, wine and beer. 

Coming into the religious circle, we religiously adopt certain practices and keep doing them for life. Our ancestors did it, and so we do it. Since we do it, we force it on our children. And they, on their children. The secret to escaping this cycle is to stay aloof and never be swept by the current. Progression of an earlier activity avoids boredom and repetition. Continually refining the method, approach, and practice keeps us alert and on our feet. And so it was that we made changes in our mode of worship and its related rituals at AVM. 

And soon after bringing us to carry out puja and charity, Agathiyar had us drop it all, which I guess saved us from becoming bored with the regime and becoming tired of doing the same thing. I guess he saved us before it became an addiction, and we became "high," as my wife says, or before we became slaves to it. Mahindren pointed out that we had begun to pray that there were people, poor and hungry, on the streets, who would receive the groceries and cooked food we bought and prepared for them. Sadly, we began to wish for the continued existence of the poor and unfortunate so that we could do our part in charity and serve them. 

A young man, who landed the post of secretary and who eventually became responsible for the affairs of a temple in my neighborhood, now finds himself caught in the web and wants to quit. He confided in me that he had to do all the purchases, sought donations, and look into every tiny detail and matter in the day-to-day running of the temple. He found it a burden. A Peedham head confided the same, that she had to source funds and look after the running of the Peedham, though there were the trustees. They never moved an inch or moved a finger, but just warmed up their seats. I was surprised to hear that she had to pay a salary to the priests, the gardener, the one who tends to the cows, and the cooks. What happened to volunteering that is a core element coming to Sariyai? I guess people just want to watch, pray, and leave. She told me that I had "escaped". I am glad that I did not fall for the game that Agathiyar and later Lord Muruga played in asking me to build a temple. Instead, I brought the temple home as Lord Muruga revealed later.

When Agathiyar told a devotee to continue her practice of doing Kumbaka or holding the breath, I asked if it was necessary, for we are told of its dangers too. Agathiyar shot me down, telling me not to be overzealous and that it was for her and not me. I learned back then that each method and practice is customized for each individual. I guess this is why traditionally a guru-disciple relationship was one-to-one back in the past and not that of holding classes for the masses or online as at present. 

The Siddhas see the events that are about to unfold and come to our aid. And so did Agathiyar ask my daughter to have a medical checkup done and report to him. He had her take the holy basil for 48 days and report to the Siddha physician J.Ariwananthen Aiya of Agathiar Yoga Herbs Care Centre, too, for a checkup. The physician gave her some herbal preparation. I too got to take a Kaya Karpa for my general health and Agathiyar Kuzhambu, after a long time. We have to seek the help of doctors and Siddha physicians as they are the authorities on these. Agathiyar has all the people in the right places to help us out. He comes when there is a need to inform. We are very grateful to him. 

But seeking God is very personal. As such, can anyone truly show us the way, the path, the method, and the means to it? Can anyone claim to be an authority on religious and spiritual matters? Everyone is walking the path and journeying towards it, be it the layman or the guru, for Ramalinga Adigal, in charting the many phases, speaks of its numerous stages. Where do we stand in this spiritual ladder? How long is the journey going to take us to reach the top? It all begins with faith and belief first, and taking little baby steps, not forgetting the effort and practice needed to reach there. Rest assured, we shall see the results in good time. 

In walking the path, both Tavayogi and Agathiyar have given us numerous tools. Standing at the door to Sariyai, we stood before the granite and bronze statues in the temple, where we came to worship the element of earth. In serving and helping around at the temple, we became grounded. We left our baggage of karma behind, going home a bit lighter. Walking the path of Sariyai further, going on a holy pilgrimage, we dip in the Holy Ganges, which is of the water element. She washes away further our karma. Arriving at Kriyai, lighing to light the Homam that is of the fire element, we burn the remaining karma in its fire, turning it to ashes. In taking up Yoga, we take in the Prana, which is the element of air. Sitting in Dhyana, we enter the space.  Conquering all five elements, we enter the state of Sat Chit Ananda. In journeying this path laid by the Siddhas, we gain self-confidence to take things into our hands and lose our previous dependency on middlemen and others. After having cleansed the slate of past karma and wiped out our fate, holding the hands of the Siddhas, we begin to write our own destiny.

THE ILLUSION DISPELLED

 

HONEST TO THE CORE

Speaking to Mahindren a moment ago, touching on souls and how they design and take on a body fit for their purpose, or to see through the desires that they carry, I wondered how twins came to be. Was it one soul in two bodies or two individual souls? When the question and doubt appeared last night, I immediately called up Mahindren, for he had a twin brother too. But he was already in bed by that time. Moments later, my question was answered. Though they were twins, they could not possibly come out together at the same moment, holding hands. One had to come earlier, while the other followed later. So it is considered as two souls coming together, to take up two individual bodies and be born one before the other. As such, they would be of two individual personalities and characters. 

On another note, Agathiyar, giving them certain practices, had told a couple who were wishing for a child that they would be blessed with one. But it has been years now since we heard any good news from them. Why did it not materialize, and why the delay? We don't want to see Agathiyar called a liar, nor us accused of cooking up a story or giving false hope. Whenever Agathiyar, the Siddhas, the gurus in Samadhi, and the deities come through me, Mahindren or Sakthee, my very concern is that they fulfill what they had promised their devotees or seekers, for otherwise, besides their good name tarnished, we too would be seen as putting together an act. Just as we have to safeguard their good name, they too have to take care of us. 

Jnana Jothiamma, who spoke to Goddess Kali and Karupanasamy, was told that the Goddess had left a guru and his words were not those of hers, as he had deviated. As the deity never exposed him, people kept thronging, thinking that the Goddess was speaking through him. Similarly, when the members of a local temple committee battling for power came to a near battle of fists and the police were summoned, a friend called Mahindren, who was then with me over, for they had served the Goddess in the absence of a priest in the past. Goddess Kali, coming through him and watching the ruckus, told the friend that she was not there and had moved out. But that she would appear whenever a good soul came by the temple. I too sensed and said the same when I was in India in 2003, and again locally some time back while visiting a temple and Samadhi.  My instinct appeared to be true later. 

Fearing that all this would get into my head, Lord Muruga came to warn me to be aware of Maya and its workings. He told us that Lord Siva and Agathiyar, together with Lord Indran, were playing their lila. Later, Agathiyar acknowledged this and asked me to sieve through Maya to arrive at the truth. Only then did I understand why Tavayogi at the onset had shot me down, saying I was living in Maya, thinking that he was a holy man dressed in the garb of a Sadhu, mendicant, Sanyasi, and Turavi. When I was at his ashram later, he showed me the different shades of guru, bringing me to their places. 

Fearing all this, my wife and I had initially asked Agathiyar to put a stop to this after he began to bring a string of strangers to my home wanting to see him and his bronze statue in 2010. He did listen to us. No one came by knocking on my door wanting to see him. Then one day, as I entered his room and stood before him, he asked me where I would go if he were to shut his ears. That hit me like a bolt of lightning. Indeed, I go to him for all my needs, too. Where and to whom would I turn to if he decides to look the other way? He assured me no harm would come to either my family or me and that he was only using my home as the venue and my body to move things. When we submitted to his lila, everyone poured out their grievances to me, or rather, him. Even those whom I meet in my morning and evening walks would stop to share their grievances. From family feuds and medical problems to financial losses, I have heard it all. 

I have begun to appreciate Tavayogi for his patience in sitting and listening to the many who came by and shared their problems. All he would say was to point out that their sufferings were due to their karma and asked that they worship the Siddhas. That is all he would say.  I had burned my fingers giving advice in the initial years and received a tight slap on my cheeks from Tavayogi for interfering back then.

I am glad that I listened to Agathiyar and glad that I have begun to listen patiently without giving any advice these days, for Agathiyar saved a soul that contemplated suicide. The latest was a 70-year-old man who needed a shoulder to cry on. 

Not only that, when we gave the nod when Lord Muruga came asking us to step aside and watch their play, all hell, or in this case heaven, broke loose. The deities came in torrents. All heaven rained deities and Siddhas. So too did Agathiyar in the beginning years often mention that he stopped over at my home, Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM), as he took a walk in the Vanam briefly before either heading for Kailash or Pothigai. As a result of rituals and austerities carried out at AVM, Lord Muruga told us that our present home was now Agathiyar Tapovanam (ATM). Post-pandemic Agathiyar, who had previously mentioned that my home would become Gnana Kottam, came by, sitting and dining with us, and preaching and sharing his Gnanam with us.  This reminded me of relatives telling my mother that Lord Muruga would come in their dreams and say that he had come by our family home in our hometown back then, when I was a kid. I, too, for reasons unknown, would turn back to look at my family home and raise my hands in prayer each time I left home.

I guess just as Agathiyar told me that he had pushed me into certain awkward, dangerous, and shameful situations before, for want of those experiences too, I needed to see through this phase too in my travels and journey. But I like the way the Siddhas handle matters. Though it hurts at times, they are frank and honest. 

HUMILITY

Nature can indeed be a teacher, teaching us humility. In the song "Ninaithu Ninaithu Paarthen" from 7G Rainbow colony, a verse goes as follows: அமர்ந்து பேசும் மரங்களின் நிழலும், உன்னை கேட்கும் எப்படி சொல்வேன், where the lyricist says that the trees under which they sat as a couple and took shade are now asking about her and where she was. Beautiful right?

Taking a walk in the park and seeing these trees that have outlived many of our generations makes us realize that our lifespan is minute compared to theirs, just as Balamurugan, who had been to Kailash, mentioned that he felt like an infant before the majestic towering mountain and felt so minute and small before the boulders there.

So too have these benches listened to others' conversations in the following short films. And it is telling no one nor sharing, unlike books. 

Carl Sagan defines the book in the 11th episode of his legendary 1980s Cosmos series, titled “The Persistence of Memory,” as follows,

"What an astonishing thing a book is. It’s a flat object made from a tree with flexible parts on which are imprinted lots of funny dark squiggles. But one glance at it and you’re inside the mind of another person, maybe somebody dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people who never knew each other, citizens of distant epochs. Books break the shackles of time. A book is proof that humans are capable of working magic."

When many go on tours, or attend concerts, or events, rather than being in the moment, they try to capture them for a later moment by taking photos and videos. We have become overly dependent on the smartphone and the internet. What if the internet were to crash one day? 

Prapanjam is listening to us. Agathiyar tells me that just as we sing their praise, speaking about the Siddhas, the Siddhas too speak about us. He asks me to connect with her and access all that is spoken when I told him that I could not retain the conversations he has with me, having to depend on recordings. 

SPACING OUT

I have come to believe just now that my current state of doing nothing was spacing out or Tayutau in Japanese. After having me go on a pilgrimage to sort my debts and karma in a past birth in 2003, having me stay in an ashram and venture into the woods, jungles, and caves following Tavayogi and upon returning home having me carry out the ritual of Homam to appease the wrath of Mother Earth and for the good of all of creation in 2005, as Tavayogi and Agathiyar explained respectively, after having me officially come to the fold of Yoga with Tavayogi giving me several techniques in 2007, after coming as a bronze statue and have me and my family conduct the ritual of libation or Abhisegam in 2010, after having the youths whom he send over to my home that took on the name Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) to watch and participate in the Siddha puja and engaging us in doing charity in 2013, and finally after having me bring down the shutters on all the above activities in 2019, he had me go within. In 2022, Agathiyar opened up the gates at Svadishtana chakra to release the pent-up energy that awakened as a result of the opening of the Muladhara, triggered by the Yoga practice, which resulted in the blooming of the 1000-petaled flower in the Sahasrara. Asking him if there was anything further to do, maybe another practice, Agathiyar replied that there was nothing further to do, and that she would do her work. Since then, I had been idling around, no activity and no practice to take up or follow. I have come to know now that I was spacing out. It is truly beautiful. 

It reminds me of Osho asking us to notice the space, the gap or interval between two breaths without effort. Osho, in his "Book of Secrets," says that, 

"Breath is the bridge. Not only is the breath a bridge to your body, but it is also a bridge between you and the universe. Breath is also the bridge between you, and space and time." 

"Buddha's enlightenment was based on using breath just as a technique to turn inwards - only this. Buddha said, "Be aware of your breath as it is coming in and going out." Eventually, we shall take notice of the gap or interval between two breaths without effort. 

Agathiyar told me back then in the Nadi that both Lord Ganesa and Lord Buddha were exponents of Vaasi or breath.

Osho, in his "Book of Secrets," brings us Shiva's first of nine techniques concerned with the breath,  from the "Vigyan Bhairav Tantra." 

"If you can feel the gap, Shiva says, the beneficence, then nothing else is needed. You are blessed, you have known; the thing has happened."

Osho in "The White Lotus", Jaico Publishing House, 2004, says further.

When people come to me, and they ask, ‘How to meditate?’ I tell them, ‘There is no need to ask how to meditate, just ask how to remain unoccupied. Meditation happens spontaneously. Just ask how to remain unoccupied, that’s all. That’s the whole trick of meditation – how to remain unoccupied. Then you cannot do anything. The meditation will flower. When you are not doing anything, the energy moves towards the center, and it settles down towards the center. When you are doing something, the energy moves out. Doing is a way of moving out. Non-doing is a way of moving in. Occupation is an escape. You can read the Bible, you can make it an occupation. There is no difference between religious occupation and secular occupation: all occupations are occupations, and they help you to cling outside your being. They are excuses to remain outside.

THE CANDIDATE

I concluded my last post saying that,

"If, after coming to hold their hands, my life was not in my hands but theirs, carrying out their bidding and tasks given, to their hearts' joy and contentment, the Siddhas have since then handed the key to me. After taking charge of me, they have now handed over the right to express myself and do as I wish. I am grateful to them for their faith and belief in me. I am grateful for their grace, love, and compassion. I shall try to live up to their expectations. I shall never let them down, as Agathiyar once told me to walk tall, for only then can he walk tall too."

Looking back now on my travels that began first with Tavayogi starting me on Sariyai by taking me to the abodes of the Siddhas in the physical world, and next in bringing me to Kriyai, having me carry out rituals that made my worship to the Siddhas complete, he had me bridge both worlds. Next taking up Yogam shown by Tavayogi, Agathiyar came to bridge the energies within with the without by awakening the chakras. With total surrender I came to savor the fruits of the journey. 

Just as I came to know about the Siddhas in the nineties from Siddha physician Dr.Krishnan, but only came to the worship of the Siddhas six years later when I was 43, Agathiyar who was the soul or JeevAtma that designed and engineered this body to do his tasks, and who later went into hiding and later returned to guide me through the Nadi, has now chose to reveal himself as the Self. 

We are all one Atma. One energy that has taken various forms. We are here to do God's work he says.

அனைத்தும் ஒரே ஆத்மா. ஒரே சக்தி கூடி செயல்படுகின்றோம்.  அவ்வளவுதான். இறைவனின் செயலைச் செலுத்துகிறோம். 

The "I" has to be erased. Only then shall the Atma surface. That is my Atma too. All is God's Atma (ParamAtma). We are all part of God. We have come to do his work.

உங்கள் வடிவம் நாமம் மறைய வேண்டும். அந்த நான் மறைய வேண்டும். அப்போது மிஞ்சி இருப்பது பரிசுத்த ஆத்மா. அது என் ஆன்மா. அகத்தியனின் ஆத்மா. ஈசனின் ஆத்மா. சுப்பிரமணியனின் ஆத்மா. தவயோகியின் ஆத்மா. முருகனின் ஆத்மா. அன்னையின் ஆத்மா. விஷ்ணுவின் ஆத்மா. நாம் அனைவரும் கடவுளின் அம்சம். அவரின் வேலையைப் பார்ப்பத்திற்கு வந்திருக்கின்றோம்.

We have taken many births. But then we only attended to our work. At least begin to do God's work now. Ask Agathiyan what your purpose is in coming here. He shall make you realize. He shall guide you on what to do and what to let go.

பல பிறப்பு எடுத்து விட்டோம். அப்போது நாம் காரியத்தைப் பார்த்துக் கொண்டிருந்தோம். இனியாவது இறைவனின் காரியத்தைப் பாப்போம். அகத்தியனிடம் கேளுங்கள் "நான் எதிர்க்கு வந்தேன்?" அவன் உணர்த்துவான். எதனை நீங்கள் செய்யணும் என்று, எதனை நீங்கள் செய்யலாகாது என்று, அவன் உணர்த்துவான்.

Your Atma shall speak to you. Only when you drop your work shall your Atma arise. It will begin to do its work. Agathiyan shall drive your Atma and bring it with him.  

உங்களுடைய ஆத்மா உங்களிடம் பேசும். எப்போது உங்களுடைய காரியத்தை விட்டு விடுகிறீர்கள் அன்றுதான் உங்களுடைய ஆத்மா வெளிவரும். அது தந்காரியத்தைப் பார்க்கும். அகத்தியன் உங்கள் ஆத்மாக்குள் செலுத்துவான். உங்கள் ஆத்மாவை தன்னுடன் கூட்டி செல்வான்.

It shall not be after death but right now in the here. It is not death. Do not waste precious time by stalling. Everything should happen now in the present. It should all take place while you are alive. Once life leaves you you are just a corpse. It serves no purpose. Achieve it while alive.

அது இறப்புக்கு பின்னர் இல்லை இப்போதே இத்தருணமே கூட்டி செல்வான். அது இறப்புக்கு சமம் இல்லை. இறப்புக்கு பின்னர்தான் அனைத்தும் நடக்கின்றது என்று எண்ணிக்கொண்டு பொன்னான காலங்களைப் போக்கி விடுகின்றனர். அனைத்துமே இப்போதே நடக்க வேண்டும். அனைவரும் என்னுடன் இப்போதே வந்து சேர வேண்டும். உங்களின் ஆத்மா என்னோடு இணைய வேண்டும். அனைத்தும் உயிருடன் இருக்கும் போதே நடந்தேற வேண்டும். உயிர் பிரிந்தபின் அது வெறும் சவம். யாருக்கும் பயன் அற்று அழுகி போகும். உயிர் இருக்கும் போதே அனைத்தையும் சாதித்து விடுங்கள்.

As we recall all the above that Agathiyar told us in January of 2022, Agathiyar reminds us why Lord Murugan came to asked us to surrender. It is only when we surrender that the divine can work on us. It is only when the "I" that is thought to be the doer submits to the holy feet of the divine that the Atma that resides within us and has been watching silently can arise to lead us to greater heights, not to achieve more monetary gains but attain greater spiritual heights. The Atma shall show the way to God. This JeevAtma shall lead us to the ParamAtma. The ParamAtma shall come as a guru in a physical form or feed its thoughts to the JeevAtma residing within us and move us. Either way, it is the divine who then moves the chess pieces. 

அமைதியாக அகத்தியன் செயல் படுவான். முதலில் உங்களை என்னிடம் ஒப்படையுங்கள். அன்றே என் குருநாதன் பலமுறை உங்களிடம் வந்து அமர்ந்து உங்களிடம் பலமுறை கேட்டான் சரணம் அடைந்து விடீர்களா?

"Surrender unto me. Lord Murugan had come earlier and reminded you of the need to surrender. This is the reason."

முதலில் உங்களை என்னிடம் ஒப்படையுங்கள். அன்றே என் குருநாதன் பலமுறை உங்களிடம் வந்து அமர்ந்து உங்களிடம் பலமுறை கேட்டான் சரணம் அடைந்து விடீர்களா? அதற்க்கு இதுதான் அர்த்தம்.

Surrender when you are still alive. There is nothing to achieve after death. Karma shall follow the dead. If you achieve it while still alive there is no death. Neither is there karma.

உயிர் இருக்கும் போதே சரண் அடைந்து விடுங்கள். இறப்புக்கு பின்னர் ஏதும் இல்லை. இறந்தவனுக்குத்தான் மரு பிறப்பு. இறந்தவனுக்குத்தான் கர்மா தொடரும். இருக்கும் போதே சாதித்து விட்டால் மரணமும் இல்லை கர்மாவும் இல்லை.

Having got the greatest boon from Agathiyar, this is where I have to tread with caution for it is akin to walking on the razors edge. I am to go back to reminding myself of all the teachings of my gurus especially on humbleness and not slip into arrogance that destroyed King Ravana of the past and many gurus in present times too. History stands witness to how arrogance, the ego, destroys man. In witnessing others flaws and their downfall it serves as a lesson for us to take charge of our lives the way the Siddhas intended and desired. This is where I have to be continuously aware of my consciousness and senses, and keep watch. This could yet be another test for me, probably my final after having tested me several times earlier to see if I was a viable candidate for the post that the Siddhas have reserved for me. I am glad and grateful that I had made it this far to qualify to be a candidate to join their folds. I shall continue to please them as I have done all this while.

FATE & DESTINY 2

Velayutham Karthikeyan Aiya, who was the admin and author behind the blog "Siththan Arul", posted that the Siddhas had wished that whoever sought them for solutions to their problems and surrendered to them, shall be pardoned for their past deeds, however bad and evil they may be, and shall not be put through the trial and tribulations and made to face the consequences, but instead be saved. Agathiyar, who did not give up on his devotees, approached Lord Brahma and voiced their concern for humanity to him. Agathiyar humbly requests that Brahma change the karma of all those who came seeking him (Agathiyar) as he had given his word to them. He seeks Brahma's word of promise that he would not harm any of his devotees. 

Brahma asked him, 

"You are asking me to go easy on too many devotees. It would take no less than 10 years to seek out their Nadi or Olai Suvadi and make changes to their fate. If you keep on recommending that I save them by changing their fate, who is going to pay back for their deeds and karma? Do we not need to punish them for their karma?" 

Agathiyar pleads with Brahma, telling him that he believes all should be saved and that their fate should be changed. He suggests that Brahma increase his workforce so that these changes could be hastened. 

Finally, Brahma submits and replies that although he cannot stop the incident from happening, he can reduce the repercussions or effects as a result of that event. When Brahma granted the Siddhas this wish, the next instant the Siddhas wrote down: the reasons for each individual’s sufferings; listed out solutions and remedies; and showed ways and means to overcome or end the seeker's problems, sins, diseases, illnesses, and sufferings. These writings came to be known as the Nadi. 

If we are used to finding easy ways to solve our problems, seeking mediums and middlemen, shamans, priests, and gurus, for immediate relief through dispersement of the sacred ash, miracle water, and baths, talismans, amulets, etc, coming to the Siddhas, though, they make us walk the talk. They send us on pilgrimages that help shed our karma. They have us place the efforts in lighting the sacrificial fire or Homam, and have us place all our worries in it for the fire to consume. They have us personally bathe the statues of Siddhas and deities to cool them down and appease them, in asking for their aid. Besides the rituals, they get us to the ground to carry out charity, which, besides helping to shed the karma of both parties, the giver and receiver on the other end, brings on love and compassion towards others, ridding us of our selfish outlook. They get us going on Yoga to help rebuild our declining state of health. There is no easy way to it. One has to place the efforts. We cannot buy our way out of our karma.  

So too did my life take a turn, and I saw myself sitting before a Nadi reader in 2002. Agathiyar came into my life after I took up the call to see the Nadi and come to the worship of the Siddhas. Agathiyar in the Nadi spoke about karma too, and he gave me the remedies to soften their effects just as Brahma had promised. Knowing my past karma and carrying out the remedies given cleared the path for me to see the results of my worship and practices, and my efforts that I was otherwise deprived of earlier. Though this moment of exposure of my faults and flaws in my past life did not impact me back then, today I am thankful to Agathiyar for pleading to Lord Brahma for all of us. If Agathiyar, on his part, had helped me soften my karma by giving me the remedies and showing me the means and the ways, the method and the practices that were to come my way, helped me start a new journey. I guess I have earned the right to rewrite my destiny. I began to rewrite my fate and chart a new destiny, with the Siddhas holding the pen and my hand.

Agathiyar had me perform a puja known as Siddharku Thanam or a ritual to show my appreciation and thanks-giving to the Siddhas, by making certain offerings, which I did. Here, then, I learned to carry out the Siddha puja for the very first time when Nadi guru Senthilkumar led me in reciting the names of the Siddhas. I took back the tools and the method and began to continue the worship of the Siddhas in my home, as Agathiyar had asked me to in the Nadi. 

Eight years later, pleased with my devotion towards him, he came into my home as a bronze statue. And three years later, my home became his Agathiyar Vanam (AVM) with the arrival of youths whom he sent to watch and participate in my home puja. Then, in 2018, Lord Muruga, in a Nadi reading, tells me that my home was his temple. I am humbled and grateful for this. 

Just as my home transformed from that of a family man into a temple, the Siddhas began to work on my inner transformation. After Lord Siva came in a dream and had me take a break from puja and bakti as in Sariyai, for some 14 years, leaving me blank and empty of all rituals and readings, after having me let go of my hold on Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal even before the seed could sprout, and after returning naked from my visit to Kallar ashram and travels with Tavayogi as directed by Agathiyar in 2005, where Tavayogi had me drop my hold on the Rudraksa bead even before the thought sproated in me, and had me shed the Navarathnam ring and Rasami bead that I had on me, Agathiyar had Tavayogi show me and several others certain Yoga techniques which I put into practice on his next visit to Malaysia in 2007. If initially I saw a surge of Prana come within, I had to endure an excruciating pain in the lower back for some 2 1/2 years between 2010 and 2012. I never realized until Agathiyar addressed the issue in the Nadi, telling me that the practice had awakened the Muladhara chakra in me. With his grace, the knot gave way as I positioned myself to repeat the exercises before my physiotherapist at the government clinic in 2012.  In 2022, Agathiyar came to release the pent-up energy that had ponded at Svadishtana. It saw its way up the higher chakras in days, flowering at the Sahasrara eventually.

If, after coming to hold their hands, my life was not in my hands but theirs, carrying out their bidding and tasks given, to their hearts' joy and fulfillment, the Siddhas have since then handed the key to me. After taking charge of me, they have now handed over the right to express myself and do as I wish. I am grateful to them for their faith and belief in me. I am grateful for their grace, love, and compassion. I shall try to live up to their expectations. I shall never let them down, as Agathiyar once told me to walk tall, for only then can he walk tall too. 

FATE & DESTINY

When I was called to come to the worship of the Siddhas in 2002, I had no idea what I was getting into or what to do. But I took it up. Armed with a painting of Agathiyar and a booklet carrying the names of the Siddhas, which Sivabalan and Nadi reader Senthilkumar, the former having brought the latter from Avinashi in India, gave me respectively. I was brought to revive my home puja that had been on hold for some 14 years after Lord Siva came in a dream and asked me to put on hold all my questions as to why people around me suffered, and doubts about whether God was truly loving and compassionate. To know further about their worship, I knocked on the doors of institutions, centers, peedhams, and ashrams carrying the name of Agathiyar. I met fellow seekers on the path in these places. But I was not captivated nor pulled to frequent these places as they did. 

Going on my maiden pilgrimage, I was brought to knock on the door of Supramania Swami on the pretext of having a horoscope reading for my daughter. It was a timely divine intervention for all the following reasons. Why should my wife mention about charting the horoscope just as I was about to leave my house and board the cab that took me to the airport for my flight to India? Why Raji, who was assigned to bring me places by the tour agent, had to fall sick, and why Deva had to replace him? Deva turns out to be Supramania Swami's brother-in-law. Telling him my wife's desire to have the horoscope charted in India, Deva tells me that his brother-in-law was an astrologer in town and brings me over to meet him. And so I met my very first guru in the physical form, a guru who showed me piety and humbleness, love and care, and most importantly, how to behave and carry oneself before one's guru. He showed me Guru Bakti that until then I had only read in books. He had five gurus, namely his father, Jayaraman Pillai, Pundi Mahan or Atru Swami of Tiruvannamalai, Sathanandha Swami of Salem, Kollimalai Swami, and Yogi Ramsuratkumar or Visiri Samy. Now I had all these great souls looking upon me.

But as I was to take up the worship of the Siddhas, Agathiyar sent Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar Ashram to Malaysia on the pretext of officiating an affiliate Peedham in Batu Caves. Why should I have kept the leaflet announcing the intent to build a temple for Agathiyar in Kallar by a Thaai Veedu Thangarasan M.A., for whom Sentilkumar had solicited funds, after the Nadi reading? Why should my neighbor, Augustine, pass me extra copies of the Tamil newspaper that he delivered during this period of Tavayogi's arrival in Malaysia? These Tamil dailies carried news of the opening of the above-mentioned peedham, which saw me call up the number and make an appointment to see Tavayogi. Thus began a bond between a guru and a disciple. The bond went beyond Tavayogi, just as with Supramania Swami, to include Tavayogi's guru Chitramuthu Adigal, his guru Jeganatha Swamigal, his guru Ramalinga Adigal, his guru Agathiyar, his guru Lord Muruga, and his guru Lord Dhaksanamurthy.

So was it fate or destiny that brought me this far? I believe that the Siddhas erased my fate and charted a new destiny for me. I was fated to die as a child, but the Chinese Gods saved me after asking my parents to give me up for adoption to them. Coming to read my Nadi, Agathiyar charts my horoscope anew, completely different from what I had followed in all those years. Going back to seeking advice from Dr.Krishnan, who charted my horoscope and was the very first person who revealed about the Siddhas to me, he works on Agathiyar's chart for me and arrives at my time of birth as at 9.25am on Tuesday. But my birth certificate mentions I was born at 3.53am, and my mother tells me the same, that I was born in the early hours of dawn when it was still dark. And so we got to know why his predictions and those of an earlier astrologer, A.M. Doraisamy, who drafted my horoscope in the seventies, never materialized for me. Puzzling right? So which do I adopt then? Dr.Krishnan tells me to follow the Siddhas. If that is puzzling, wait till you read the following.

Going through each Nadi from three stacks, after rejection, all that were in the first two stacks and reading the third, towards the bottom, I came across a Nadi that carried my parents' names, the number of siblings, my career, and my assets. Then the jolt came. My wife's name was mentioned as Manohari, which was not her name. One might doubt that she might have another name. But while my mother was named Annalaksmi, my father, after their marriage, switched it to Valliammai. If this was picked up and mentioned by Agathiyar in the Nadi, he would have mentioned my wife's name too, which he did not. And so we took it as not mine and moved on to another Nadi. I finally found my Nadi on another visit. 

Then, in 2018, Lord Muruga, in a Nadi reading, told me that my fate was changed that moment. And so the Siddhas decided to erase my fate again and chart a new destiny from that moment on. This brings me to recount the times I stood either sick or in pain before the Chinese deities who came in a trance, chanting in Chinese. He would dip a brush in red ink and write on yellow rice paper Chinese characters and burn it, collecting its ashes in a glass of water, and have me drink it.  Similarly, many problems of devotees were burned away, or solutions favorable to them arose after they lit the Homam at Kallar and at AVM. Most recently, Agathiyar told a family to place all their problems into the burning fire of the Homam that he had them lit in my home, and never look back. 

And similarly, the Siddhas, after having sent youths to my home, which became AVM, to walk the phase of Sariyai and after giving us the tools and methods to carry out Kriya and after giving us the practice and techniques of Yoga, had me let go of the association, the rituals and practice, wiping clean the slate, and left me blank and empty and at peace with myself and everything around me. They have brought me to the state of acceptance, fulfilment, and completeness. They let me write my own destiny now. I can pick up any task, as and when required, and they shall endorse it, says Agathiyar. So it is pretty obvious that one can change one's fate and draw up a new destiny, taking the hand of the Siddhas. The Gods and the Siddhas tinker with our fate when we seek them out of devotion and love. The Siddhas take us further, empowering us, never wanting us to be dependent on another, even them, for our spiritual evolution forever. They never possess us but instead show us the way up the ladder. They raise awareness of the soul or Atma in us and rejoice in seeing souls return home. They raise us to the state of a guru and eventually a Siddha too.