FULFILLING ONE'S RESPONSIBILITY

A friend sent me a story in Tamil on Velladai Siddhar. The translation to the best of my ability of the highlight in his life follows.

Agathiyar is said to have a disciple in Velladai Siddhar. He had Agathiyar's darshan where Agathiyar come before him. Velladai Siddhar in seeking infinite knowledge had met numerous masters and gurus but did not get answers. Then Vadakarai Sivananda Paramahansa Swami initiated him into Vaasi Yogam. Having practiced the technique he headed then for Palani. He received the darshan of Bhogar and got an initiation. Practicing further he then roamed the country as many as three times. Around 1935, he arrived at Kalyani Falls on Pothigai hills where Agathiyar is known to reside. He had to crawl some three kilometers through passageways and chimneys inside a cave and arrived at a pond across which sat Agathiyar with his disciples in meditation. On praying that he gets to be with his guru on the opposite bank, he is teleported immediately. One of Agathiyar's disciples questions him then. He manages to give the reply to some 1000 questions put forward. The disciple gave him a mantra that would bring Agathiyar out of his meditation. Upon opening his eyes Agathiyar asks him how he got there? "It was all possible by your grace" replied Velladai Siddhar. He mentions his intent in staying permanently with Agathiyar and requests his permission. Agathiyar replies, "You have yet some responsibilities to fulfill. Go back home. I will meet you there." Velladai Siddhar returned to Appupillaiyur in Kerala. He carried out his responsibilities towards his family as ordained by Agathiyar and went into Jeeva Samadhi here at the age of 108. 

Read the original in Tamil at http://maghavilvam.blogspot.com/2012/10/blog-post_21.html

Kindled into knowing about Velladai Siddhar, I searched the net and came across the following miracle. Born in Tanjavur he grew up in Appupillaiyur in Kerala. He used to treat the villagers with herbs and fortified his body with Kaya Kalpa. Once an X-ray was done. It showed a bright flame within him. It is said that this X-ray is still kept in his Samadhi temple. (https://dheivegam.com/velladai-sidhar-jeeva-smadhi-special/)

Closer to home, a devotee voiced his confusion as to which path to pursue further as he was deeply troubled and believed that family life and career intruded into his time with Agathiyar. He saw them as a hindrance to following the teachings and practices given by the Siddhas. Seeking clarification Agathiyar clears the air for him telling him to give priority to his duty as the head of his family and to carry out his social responsibilities. He could adhere to his teachings and practice during other times. My late father had served a master only to be told that he had responsibilities towards his family and was sent back to Malaysia. He told my father to settle his affairs and then join him. My father never went back. He passed away peacefully sitting in a yogic pose or asana at home. I never got to ask him who he served. 

The friend had another story to share. 

I know of an elderly lady,...A Grandma of my friend's friend. This lady had met Sadhu Krishnaveni Amma, at her cave. She had pleaded with Amma to let her stay with Her, and be of service to Her. Amma told her that this wasn't the time, and that she has to go back to her family. Such are the way of the Masters.

Mahakavi Bharathi like other saints was so into the thought of the divine that he could see through the veil of Maya and recognized and considered all as trivial matters and menial in nature. When he knew he had a higher purpose in life he began to weep and cry to the divine Mother that he was being dragged into the matters of the kitchen so to say, as his wife would inform him that they had run out of kitchen supplies etc. He sings that he has surrendered to her will in the hope that in doing the Divine's willing he shall see its completion rather than think about his desires and become restless over it.

தன்செய லெண்ணித் தவிப்பது தீர்ந்திங்கு

நின்செயல் செய்து நிறைவுபெறும் வண்ணம்
நின்னைச் சரணடைந்தேன் — கண்ணம்மா!
நின்னைச் சரணடைந்தேன்!

Life might just be confusing at times. When we are rooted deep into the affairs of the world, a Siddha comes by and reminds us of our commitment towards him and the divine and initiates the move to break away from it all. On the other hand for another who finds it hard to engage further in the same affairs of the world and desires to leave it all behind him, he is reminded of his responsibilities. I have begun to see it all as the will of the divine. If the divine wills it and its time, he summons us. Otherwise, even if we desire for it and await his permission, or move towards it he comes to halt it too. In asking me to go within he told on the onset that I cannot possibly do it but insisted that I try and gave me techniques to pursue towards reaching the goal. After several events unfolded around me that mooted me to want to shut myself, he told me that the time was not right and that he would indicate the right moment to do so. Meanwhile, he said that he needed me to carry out his work in lieu of the number of seekers that had yet to come by at AVM. In asking him to help me purge or rid myself of: diseases of the body or உடல் பிணி;  discharges from the body or உடல் மாசு; and waste from the body or உடல் கழிவு so that I could reach him, he tells me that it would not be an easy task but assures that he would be by me. He asks to continue what I am doing right now. When I complained to him about the challenges I faced from my surrounding neighborhood that came along in a very deliberate and timely manner just when he had instructed me to go within, to test my will power and patience, Agathiyar did not seem to take note of it or pay attention to my outpourings. Ramalinga Adigal in acknowledging that they were obstacles to my practice, consoled me telling me that I shall soon learn to overcome them. Upon pleading further and continuously lamenting to Agathiyar to create a conducive environment for me to sit and try to meditate in peace, finally, Lord Shiva acknowledged my prayer telling me he shall take care of matters. True to his promise all the issues that troubled me earlier have begun to subside on its own. I believe he had a hand in it. As I began typing these last words, I received a message from my friend that sort of made me realize why Agathiyar was silent on this matter. He had a lesson for me to learn from this chain of events. His message came my way to clearly remind me of who I was. It went as follows:

If you are irritated by things around you, bring your attention within. The reason for being irritated stems from you. Your expectation or desire might be otherwise or you might have had a condition laid out. This is the cause of your irritation. You cannot possibly condition the world to your liking. When you begin to challenge that you end up irritated. 

முனிவர் நமக்குச் சொல்கிறார்:

"இதை, நீ ஞாபகத்தில் வைத்துக் கொள். உன்னைச் சுற்றி இருப்பவற்றால் நீ எரிச்சல் அடைந்தால், உன் கவனத்தை உள்முகமாகத் திருப்பு. எரிச்சலுக்கான காரணம் நீயாகத்தான் இருப்பாய். உனது எதிர்பார்ப்பு அல்லது ஆசை வேறாக இருந்திருக்கும்; அல்லது ஏதோ ஒரு நிபந்தனையை உனக்குள் நீ விதித்திருப்பாய். அதுதான் உனது எரிச்சலுக்குக் காரணம்.. உலகத்தை நமக்கேற்ப நிர்ப்பந்தப்படுத்த முடியாது..அதை எதிர்த்துப் போராடும்போது நீ வெறுப்படைகிறாய்'' என்கிறார்.

யாரையும்  நம்மால் திருத்த முடியாது ஆனால் அவர்களோடு வாழ்வதற்கு நாம் மாற்றிக்கொண்டால் பார்க்கும் காட்சிகள் அனைத்தும் அழகுதான்.

Who could possibly fathom the workings of the divine? 

TO QUESTION OR NOT

My three-year-old granddaughter, a Generation Alpha, asks me today "Who is God?" This reminded me of my daughter, a Gen Z, who was only 7 years of age back then in 2005 when she asked Tavayogi "Why do people die?" and "Where is the Soul?" It never occurred to us to ask these questions back when we were a child. We see a drastic change and leap in all fields in recent years with the advent of Gen Y, Z, and Alpha. 

Millennials, also known as Generation Y (or simply Gen Y), are the demographic cohort following Generation X and preceding Generation Z. Researchers and popular media use the early 1980s as starting birth years and the mid-1990s to early 2000s as ending birth years. This generation is generally marked by elevated usage of and familiarity with the Internet, mobile devices, and social media, which is why they are sometimes termed digital natives. Generation Z, or Gen Z for short, are the demographic cohort succeeding Millennials and preceding Generation Alpha. Researchers and popular media use the mid-to-late 1990s as starting birth years and the early 2010s as ending birth years. Generation Alpha (or Gen Alpha for short) is the demographic cohort succeeding Generation Z. Researchers and popular media use the early 2010s as the starting birth years and the mid-2020s as the ending birth years. (https://en.wikipedia.org/)

Mere answers do not satisfy them. This generation does not content with mere answers but wants to see, touch, and feel all things. They are here for the experience not contended with hearsay or explanations. Agathiyar tells us repeatedly that each child born now shall teach us adults many a thing. It is happening. Could this be the reason we are told that this is the advent of the Era of Siddhas?

In the Mongolian film "The Cave of the Yellow Dog", a small child who happens to arrive at the tent of an old woman, while looking for her pet dog that had gone astray, is given a good wash and tidied up, and fed by the old woman. While waiting for someone to claim her in the wide and vast Mongolian-Manchurian grassland or steppe the Grandma tells her a story.

"I will tell you a story. Long ago a rich man lived in this land. He had a beautiful daughter but she fell ill. No medicine could help so the father decided to ask a wise man for advice. The wise man said, "Your yellow dog must be sent away." The father asked, "But why he protects us and our herd." He replied, "That is what I have to say and what you wanted to know." The father did not have the heart to send away the dog. But for his daughter's sake, he had to do something. So he hid the dog in a cave that was impossible to escape from. He brought it food every day. But one day the dog was gone. The daughter did get better. Soon the daughter was in love with a young man, and they got married and had a child."

The child then asks the Grandma "What happened to the yellow dog?" 

"Perhaps the dog was born with a ponytail", replied the Grandma. 

When the Grandma suggested that the dog might have taken birth as a human in its next life, the child puts forth another question to her, "Will I be reborn as a person in my next life?" The grandma of the Buddhist faith then explains the concept of birth and how difficult it is to gain a human birth in a simple manner and through a simple illustration to the child. 

Grandma: "Come I shall show you something." She gives her a needle and a tray of rice grain. She has the child place grains onto the tip of a needle. "Tell me when a grain of rice balances on the tip of the needle."

Child: (after several attempts): "That's not possible."

Grandma: "That's how difficult it is to get a human birth. That's why human birth is so valuable. See my child how hard it is to be born as a human being."

 

Once back home, the child asked her mother if she (her mother) could remember her previous life. She replies "No," and that only children could remember them and always talk about them. "Only little children can do that; they often tell colorful stories. People say they are always talking about previous lives."

Children are naturally known to be curious about all things for they are at the age of exploring things around them. So what do I answer to the query about God from my granddaughter? I could only tell her that I have yet to see God. But those who have seen him have given numerous representations of him as in paintings and sculptures. I took her to her altar and showed her God who is worshiped with forms and names as depicted in the paintings. When she is older she will start the search to know God and find him. For now, this shall suffice. As for the question by my daughter for Tavayogi, he was pretty much surprised to hear the question come from a seven-year-old and took all of us gathered at the Peedham to task telling us that one should ask this kind of questions rather than ask questions that revolved around their troubles and problems which in Tavayogi's words are tangible and can be solved by discerning or Arivu. We never got to hear his reply to the latter question, though he did give a reply to why people die. He said that there comes a time when the body cannot possibly go on sustaining the soul, hence we drop the body.

I never had any questions for my gurus though I chose to follow all their teachings, directives, and instructions instead. Although many things still amaze me and I do not know nor understand their workings, I have settled to learn about them as I travel along and once I arrive at the place and the moment and no sooner. This stand has worked in my favor for with it comes peace and calm. We do not carry any baggage in anticipation of the future just as we never want to carry past baggage. 

The story of the yellow dog as told by the Grandma serves to tell us and remind us of the subtle issues and reasons for things to take place that are beyond our knowledge. The subtle and invisible force that runs deep down and governs all the events and happenings in our lives is only known to a select few associated with the divine. A friend shared a story that reminds us to accept the divine will at times, without questioning it. 

"I remember, a few years ago, ... Maybe 10 to 15, I had just started to get my feet wet, so to speak. Maybe the times were not conducive to my/family's worldly life... The Masters had sent forth a great soul, verily a Bhairava, who used to simply hang around my home. For all practical purposes, he was like a mad man. He meant no harm to anyone. One day, Vallimalai Balanandha Swamigal came home. I asked him who this person was, and he said, let him be. He has been sent for your protection. One fine day, he upped himself and left. No one has seen him again. So, I asked Swami why he had left. Swami advised me to enjoy these events without wanting to understand them. So it remains."

At times, it is best that these subtle workings are not known to us. Watching the movie "Black Box" made me realize that some things like past lives and memories are best left untouched and unknown.

Nolan finds some experimental treatment under a brilliant neurologist named Lillian (Phylicia Rashad), who is especially interested, if not forceful about trying to help Nolan parse through his memories. Her method involves using hypnosis and a "black box" to help him go back through select bits of his past, as if he were “walking in [his] own shoes.” But as Nolan revisits major points in his life, like his wedding night, or an old apartment, he starts to see creepy images - contorted figures with blank faces and cracking bones speed toward him like spiders. (https://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/black-box-movie-review-2020.)

If Lilian was interested in looking at the strings of memory, parsing through, time-stamped objects found in memory images, in the movie "Inception" an attempt is made in placing an idea into one's subconscious.  

Inception’s titular concept is the placement of an idea into a character’s subconscious. (https://www.vulture.com/article/inception-ending-movie-explained.html)

A professional thief steals information by infiltrating the subconscious of his targets. He is offered a chance to have his criminal history erased as payment for the implantation of another person's idea into a target's subconscious. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inception)

We all carry a Black Box with us through all our births. In it are the deepest secrets that we carry, that are never known to others and even us unless revealed to us by others, or we unknowingly or accidentally trigger them or through certain means attempt to reach them. At times we listen and heed the words of the wise and elders for they know too well the outcome of our actions, as they might have lived through similar events. At times we consult and decide likewise on our actions and the results of our actions. The turn of events could come about as foreseen, predicted, or prophesied based either on the vast experiences or Siddhis gifted to certain individuals. We seek astrologers and masters who are adepts at prophesizing the future for want of a guarantee to a rosy future or to remove obstacles and dangers, sufferings, or illness. Remedies are dished out to help us try to erase the past, through numerous means that are adopted in clearing out karma. Some capable of performing Siddhis or others who have learned the art of manipulating, who selectively let loose this bag of worms can either help empower one to do wonders or derail one's journey if he chooses to. Hence, there is a danger too in listening to other's experiences, advice, and prophecies for it is liable to influence our decisions. Hence, be careful to whom you show this box. Listen though but decide for yourself. If your thoughts are clouded and you cannot come to a decision but need to make one, follow your heart and take it that it is the best decision for the moment in time given the circumstances. Do not regret it if it doesn't favor you. Instead, take it as a lesson gained from the experience. You shall come out of it wiser. 

In a scene at the beginning of the Hindi movie "PK", when a student studying overseas finds the courage to tell her parents back home that she was in love with a boy of another nation and nationality, she is told by her father's guru that the boy shall jilt her. She refuses to believe him till the moment she receives an unsigned note delivered by a kid while waiting for her lover to turn up at the office of the Registrar of Marriages where they are to solemnize their wedding. She leaves the place in haste and hurt after reading the note, now ready to believe what the guru had prophesized. She returns to her country. The danger of implantation of the future happening is tailored in the final scenes of confrontation between the "alien who has come to study us" and the said Godman. During the finale where the showdown takes place between the "alien" and the said guru, she is made to realize by the "alien" that she had misunderstood the events that led to her mistakenly and wrongly receiving the note meant for another lady. As the thought was implanted in her by the Godman, she took it that her boyfriend had jilted her and left the place. When the truth is revealed, she unites with her lover who was still waiting for her call for three years. 

KNOW YOUR WORTH

The Hindi movie "PK" that questions religious dogmas and superstitions and exposes the most common weakness in man where he readily falls prey or is easily swayed by "Godmen, managers, and agents of God," moves us to think and ponder and reassess our faith and belief, practices and rituals. "The film centers on a humanoid alien who is stranded on Earth, the planet he was supposed to study. In his journey, he experiences many aspects of humanity, including religions, customs, languages, attire, practices, and beliefs" something akin to and most likely we have come to do too (https://en.wikipedia.org/). We keep coming back for the sole reason that we have not learned our lesson yet here or at least not thoroughly and for the soul reason too, that of gaining Soul Power or Atma Balam. Besides coming back to correct the mistakes done; to perfect the work given to us earlier; to complete what was left undone or left unfinished; or whatever work that we never got started doing in the first place before, our purpose here is to raise the spirit in us and others too. Man generally has a specific and individual task assigned to him that he needs to see through and serve. Besides this, according to Agathiyar in his 5 tenets given to us, he asks that we help fellow humans, animals, plants, and even minerals to evolve further in the chain and cycle of spiritual evolution. Man has the means to help all of the above to move to the next level. 

From https://www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-54690458, we are furnished with the latest studies on the relationship between dogs, cats, and humans and how they mirror human genetic patterns.

To some extent, dog genetic patterns mirror human ones, because people took their animal companions with them when they moved. ... Greger Larson, a co-author from the University of Oxford, said: "Dogs are our oldest and closest animal partner. Using DNA from ancient dogs is showing us just how far back our shared history goes and will ultimately help us understand when and where this deep relationship began." Dogs are thought to have evolved from wolves that ventured into human camps, perhaps sniffing around for food. As they were tamed, they could then have served humans as hunting companions or guards. Many animals, such as cats, probably became our pets when humans settled down to farm a little over 6,000 years ago. 

In the movie "Robin Hood", Robin tells King John, "Empower everyman and you shall gain strength." In the movie "Dr. Strange", we learn that "When man's mind is elevated, the spirit is deepened and the body heals." The soul is both the bridge and the medium between spirit and body say the Siddhas. Empower the soul to gain Soul Power or Atma Balam and it shall elevate the mind, deepen the spirit, and heal the body.

Jonathan Pangborn tells Dr. Strange: "I’d given up on my body. I thought my mind’s the only thing I have left I should at least try to elevate that. So, I sat with gurus and sacred women. Strangers carried me to mountaintops to see holy men, and finally, I found my teacher. And my mind was elevated, and my spirit deepened. And somehow…"

Dr. Stephen Strange: "Your body healed."

Jonathan Pangborn: "Yes. There were deeper secrets to learn there, but I didn’t have the strength to receive them. I chose to settle for my miracle and I came back home."

In another scene from this movie, we are shown the Astral Body's journey and encounter briefly when it is forcibly set free from the physical body. When the Ancient One suddenly forces Dr. Strange’s Astral Body out of his physical body for a brief moment, he returns stunned and questions her.

Dr. Stephen Strange: "What did you just do to me?

The Ancient One: "I pushed your astral form out of your physical form."

Dr. Stephen Strange: "What just happened?"

The Ancient One: "For a moment, you entered the astral dimension."

Dr. Stephen Strange: "The what?"

The Ancient One: "A place where the soul exists apart from the body."

Dr. Stephen Strange: "Why are you doing this to me?"

The Ancient One: "To show you just how much you don’t know. Open your eye."

The Ancient One then suddenly throws him out into the alternate dimensions too to experience it. Dr. Strange is then brought back into his body.

The Ancient One: "You think you know how the world works? You think that this material universe is all there is? What is real? What mysteries lie beyond the reach of your senses? At the root of existence, mind, and matter meet. Thoughts shape reality. This universe is only one of an infinite number. Worlds without end. Some benevolent and life-giving. Others filled with malice and hunger. Dark places where powers older than time lie ravenous and waiting. Who are you in this vast multiverse, Mr. Strange?" (https://www.moviequotesandmore.com/doctor-strange-best-quotes/)

Similarly, the Ancient One hits Hulk in the chest, pushing Banner's Astral Body out of Hulk's body momentarily in the movie "Avengers - End Game". 

The Astral Dimension, much like the Mirror Dimension, coexists alongside the Material Plane. However, to access it, one must successfully be separated from its physical form, existing in a state of pure energy. Time relative to the Material Plane is slowed down to a crawl when one enters the Astral Dimension. (Source: https://marvelcinematicuniverse.fandom.com/wiki/Astral_Dimension)

It is interesting to note that the Mirror Dimension spoken of and depicted in "Dr. Strange" has a similarity in that the rishis put to work whatever discovery of theirs in this space/ plane/ or dimension first before man taps into it gaining inspirations and ideas. This space is where it is all discovered, assembled, tried, and tested before taking form and shape in the physical dimension.

We are time after time told that this human birth is to be treasured. Adi Sankara says, “Only through God’s grace may we obtain the three rarest gifts: Human birth; the longing for liberation; and discipleship to an illumined teacher.” 

Swami Muktananda quotes Saint Sundardas in "Where Are You Going - A Guide to the Spiritual Journey", published by Syda Foundation, 1989, “The great Saint Sundardas wrote, “You have attained this human body through God’s grace. You cannot attain it repeatedly. This human body is a priceless jewel. Do not throw it away.” 

Swami Chidvilasananda in "Inner Treasures", A Siddha Yoga Publication, 1995, mirrors Sankara’s thoughts. “The Indian scriptures teach that earth is the place where you come to work out all your karma, the consequences of your actions, both good and bad. This is where you have the opportunity to learn the greatest lessons and ascend to the highest awareness. Even celestial beings want to take birth in this place. It is the work of the Saints to awaken people from samsara, the world of the wandering, from this chakra, this wheel, the cycle of birth and death.’’ 

Shantideva, a Buddhist master from the monastic university of Nalanda, India, describes human birth as a rare gift. He says, “Only as a human can you be devoted to God, the creator." He reminds us not to waste a rare opportunity to devote oneself to God. He says, “This human leisure, opportunities, and faculties are very rare to obtain and easily lost.” He questions us, “If one squanders the chance to fulfill the aim of human life, how will such an opportunity arise again?” 

The Siddhas regard this birth as very auspicious and rare. Siddha Avvai says, “Rare indeed is to take human birth, rarer than that is to be born with a perfect human form, sight, hearing, and speech. Amongst them, it is rare to see one who does austerities and charity. When one does austerities and charity the gates to Godhead are opened.” 

Another Siddha, Manikavachagar, amply expounds in his Thiruvachakam - Shivapuraanam" that, “Having taken all these life forms to achieve his present state that is being born as grass, worm, trees, various animals, stones, rocks and pebbles, various creatures, Asuras, and Devas, and having exhausted myself in doing so, I found the truth to exist under your feet and thus I entered your home, my Lord.” 

In "The Cave of the Yellow Dog", a Mongolian film, a grandma of the Buddhist faith explains the concept of birth and how difficult it is to gain a human birth in a simple manner and through a simple illustration to a child. The grandma shares life's philosophy to this small child who happens to arrive at her tent while looking for her pet dog that had gone astray.

Child: "Will I be reborn as a person in my next life?"

Grandma calls her over: "Come I shall show you something." She gives her a needle and a tray of rice grain. She has the child place grains onto the tip of a needle. "Tell me when a grain of rice balances on the tip of the needle."

Child: (after several attempts): "That's not possible."

Grandma: "That's how difficult it is to get a human birth. That's why human birth is so valuable. See my child how hard it is to be born as a human being."

Gowri Arumugam sends the message across through her song and video that "You are worth more than you think." Do not be disheartened. Have hope for the future and faith in yourself. 

MOVIES & ENLIGHTENMENT

When a former warlord who is wanted, seeks refuge at the Shaolin monastery asking to become a monk, the students oppose and ask him to leave. The abbot steps in and allows him to stay though. He explains, "All beings carry the spirit of Buddha. Buddha is open to all who are searching. Tribulation leads to wisdom. He (the warlord) knows confusion. I think he is not far from enlightenment."

True to his words, one goes through many trials and tribulations before enlightenment is possible. We are lead to experience injustice and human suffering, and a multitude of emotions that come together as a result as we walk through life. Abandonment, Accidents, Accusations, Agony, Alienation, Alone-ness, Anger, Anxiety, Shame, Attacks, Belittlement, Bereavement, Betrayal, Bitterness, Confusion, Criticism, Deception, Demeanness, Demoralization, Depression, Deprivement, Despair, Disappointment, Disgrace, Disgust, Domination, Embarrassment, Emptiness, Failure, Fear, Filth, Frustration, Guilt, Helplessness, Hopelessness, Humiliation, Hurt, Inadequacy, Incompetency, Insecurity, Insignificance, Insults, Invisible, Left out, Losing control, Losing the mind, Lost, Manipulation, Misunderstood, Mistaken, Nastiness, Neglected, Offensive, Out of control, Outcast, Powerless, Pressured, Put-down, Rejected, Ridiculed, Ruined, Scorned, Shattered, Sick, Suffocated, Terrified, Tormented, Trashed, Unaccepted, Unloved, Unsafe, Unwanted, Vengeful, Violation, Vulnerable, all that finally results in one becoming withdrawn from society. (List of emotions sourced from https://englishstudyhere.com/) It hurts and grieves us to see these emotions that many carry with them and that has lead to tragic endings.

It is our duty as fellowmen to come to the aid of souls undergoing sufferings. Compassion and love begin with a nice word of encouragement for these hurt souls. These shall motivate and get them going on with their lives. Gowri Arumugam and her label Raagawave Production, who, if you would remember, were instrumental in bringing out the album, "Agathiyar Geetham" a couple of years ago, has made a song "Poraadhu", aimed at boosting one's morale and bringing hope and cheer. The music video awaits release. 

 

Many movies had carried messages of hope and motivation for the down and trodden.

We tend to agree with Lee Eisenberg's review of the short film "The Neighbour's Window". He says that "What you can see does not necessarily tell the whole thing." Often we are told that the grass is greener on the other side, and tend to believe until we reach there and it turns otherwise and not as expected. Although our eyes are the window to the world but do we see the whole picture? As we walk with the Siddhas we begin to realize more and more that we are more and more ignorant and blind to the subtle workings of things around us. For instance, Will Zulkowsky in his book ‘Meetings with Yogi Ramsuratkumar’, published by Yogi Ramsuratkumar Bhavan, highlights the simple act of drinking tea with the Yogi that has us wonder in amusement.

Even drinking tea with Swami was a unique experience. The tea was brought in a pot with the cups empty. Swami would then place each cup carefully in front of each person, then proceed to pour the tea. Once the tea was poured, after Swami sipped His tea, then could the rest begin. This was the protocol. Once I unconsciously moved my tea cup closer after Swami had placed it. Swami then stopped, gave me a look and told me firmly I had just spoiled His work. He said then that he had to make some adjustment to compensate for my blunder.

My art teacher in primary school used to bring us outdoors to parks and have us view nature through the viewfinder cut out from cardboard and pick and draw only what we see through the opening. Looking through the framed window helps bring us to focus on a particular scene and keep out other distractions. We only see what falls within the four sides or edges of the opening and not beyond. Eventually, after hours of labor, unperturbed by what goes around us, we have a masterpiece on our hands. Anthony Bourdain in the CNN series "Parts Unknown" ends the episode "Madagascar" with a wonderful statement, that "The camera is a liar.. it shows everything.. (at the same time) it shows nothing. It reveals only what we want. Often what we see is seen only from a window... moving past and then gone. One window. My window. If you had been here chances are you would have seen things differently." How very true. 

A seeker who came over to my home after hearing about Agathiyar at AVM told me that she was impressed reading about my maiden journey to the land of her origin and was pretty surprised that I did not mention any negativities, nor write about the negative aspect or perspective and bad things about her homeland as many seem to share with her upon their return home. I told her that as I was focused on what Agathiyar told me to do on the journey, that is to carry out my remedies, I did not see anything else. I also told her that I could show these people filth and rubbish dumped in my city too. It is what we seek; what we want; and what we wish to see that comes up before us. If you wish to see rubbish and filth, you shall most definitely see it. Your eyes will pick these up. On the contrary, if you see Agathiyar daily he shall appear every place we go. My wife once pointed out, "Have you noticed that all of a sudden Agathiyar seems to crop up every place we go." Many devotees too have expressed their surprise in seeing Agathiyar in places they have been. This could be in the form of pictures, paintings, statues, as a person, as light or a glow, as a sensation or aroma. P. Radulescu says in his review of "The Neighbour's Window" that, "Every family sees only what they want to see; only what each other's heart dictates to be seen." 

The 1954 Tamil movie ''Andha Naal" and the 1970 movie "Nadu Eravil", both films made by S.Balachander, the Alfred Hitchcock of Tamil cinema, has each suspect to murder in trying to provide an alibi give his/her version or story of killing or murder that had taken place. The former is "set in the milieu of World War II". The story is about the killing of a radio engineer. The suspects are his wife, his mistress, his brother, his sister-in-law, and a neighbor. Interestingly each one's account of the incident points to a new suspect." (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andha_Naal). The latter movie revolves around a rich man and his wife living on a private island. Learning that he shall die in 20 days, he assembles all his relatives together. "Unfortunately, they are murdered one by one in the night. All are terrified. The suspicion on the murderer shifts from person to person." Most of the time the perpetrator leaves behind a track that is picked up by the forensic and gets caught. 

Man tends to leave his mark behind in all his endeavors or wherever he sets his foot. We welcome if it is constructive and helps bring or does some good to humanity as have the great discoverers, scientists, and saints. But what if it brings or does further damage. In a documentary, we see a Mongolian nomad dismantle the tent that she and her family had pitched while their animals grazed the fields. We see her clean up the place before leaving to look for another spot to stay over. What surprised me was that she went on her knees and very carefully made good the grass with her hands. They then show their gratefulness by performing a simple ritual to thank nature for accommodating them before moving out. The camera then pans to the left where we are shown an abandoned oil rig, machinery, and empty drums, remnants of an exploration well left behind by intruders. As Simon Reeves in his travels documented on BBC earth, seeing the sad state of things around us, acknowledges that "We are very good breaking up things; we are not so good in offering a fix", this scene made me sick to my stomach seeing this state of abandonment by civilized men. It made me rethink who was more civilized and ethical. The nomads move with nature. When their livestock and animals have grazed the fields they are forced to move out in search of greener pastures and fields. Similarly when adverse weather approaches they are forced to move too. They do not determine the next course of action. Nature does; nature determines. They only toe the line. 

In another documentary, we are told that the Chinese were fond of building walls: the defensive wall of the "inner city" which housed government buildings and of the "outer city", housing mainly residences. They had walls built to surround individual homes, courtyards, and spaces too. The ancient Chinese lived in perfect harmony with nature too, which is still carried into modern homes through the traditional practice of Fengshui, "a form of geomancy linked to Taoism, originating from the Chinese metaphysics of human harmony with nature." We had similar tall walls built around temples and palaces too. A home has walls; and a room too, signifying space. Each step we take brings us into another space, frame, or shot and into another moment in time. I was always amazed by my Muslim friends who always gave out their traditional greeting whenever they intruded into or moved into someone else's space, be it the seen or unseen. The Indonesians greeted anyone, irrespective of age, whom they pass by, humbly seeking permission to pass. The indigenous people always sought permission from the spirits of the jungles as they traveled deep into the jungle. The Siddhas paid their respect to deities, spirits, and energies that kept guard at the beginning and at numerous spots along the tracks in the jungle. The Chinese are known to built small shrines for the spirits and worship them before they intrude to clear and start building any project. Everything happens within time-space. 

Can we remain a watcher and not enter the space, frame, or shot, that only creates more possibilities in our lives? If only we never moved, we will not be in another frame. We will not intrude into another's space and time. We will remain forever a watcher not influencing, changing nor modifying the scene. Is this the true meaning of being still or summa eru? I guess this is what we eventually end up doing as a spirit after death, only able to watch but never able to influence and interact with our loved ones without a medium at least as shown in films like "Ghost". "Patrick Swayze in this movie is murdered, and his spirit stays behind to warn his lover, Demi Moore, of impending danger, with the help of Whoopi Goldberg, a reluctant psychic." The Tamil movie "Mudhal Thethi" shows us the frustration of a departed soul in being unable to extend help to his family. "When he is laid off by the bank Sivagnanam unable to find another job, and dejected, tries to kill himself so that his family would receive his insurance money. His soul reaches the court of Yama, the god of death. Angered by what he considers as an irresponsible act, Yama sends him back to earth to see the dilemma his family goes through after his death. Sadly he can observe the goings-on but is unable to participate and bring reprieve to them." (Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mudhal_Thethi)

I came to understand that one shall face confusion till the moment of enlightenment. You might think all is clear to you... But they dash even that... Making us re-evaluate our understanding each moment. We will never have the answers..not till the very last moment of enlightenment. But it's good for otherwise there is no reason to live if we already knew everything. So when I shared the statement of the abbot of the Shaolin monastery from the movie "Shaolin" that meant, "If you are confused you are close to enlightenment" on Whatsapp to a few readers of this blog, I received several wonderful insights from their replies.

Reader 1: "Maybe at every level, new experiences bring in new confusion and new learning..."

Reader 2: "Yes Anna. But then that confusion becomes a lesson for the next direction also Anna. But we only understand after Appa Agathiyar reveals"

Reader 3: "Hahaha yes ar Anna. Nowadays I tend to get more confused. Whenever I'm confused I just open Siddha Heartbeat blog and read through. I'm waiting for your next post...I know you have told everything, Anna. Still, I believe there is something to enlightenment me."

Reader 4: "Confusion begins when we start to realize the ephemeral nature of all that we took for granted."

Confusion leads us to seek answers first from others, be it the family, friends, or the masters or guru if we have one. Executing the ideas and solutions given, experiencing its outcome, learning more lessons, he soon learns and realizes that the answers are all within him and comes to settle within.

A reader wrote to me: "Our Masters take us under their wings when we are most impure. They then roast us in the fire of sadhana, (புடம் போட்டு) purify us and present us to Lord Shiva. Even Lord Shiva comes to us only when we are pure. Our Masters, in my view, are a step higher." I could relate this to what Agathiyar told his devotee. He said that he had found the diamond (the devotee) and was handing him over to Lord Shiva. 

The reader shared a saying he read: "If you can see the illusion, you are enlightened; if you think you are enlightened, then, you are in illusion." When the veil or curtain drops, seeing through the illusion of Maya that surrounds us, we understand all that is to be known, that it is all a divine play, and that we are here to learn some lessons. For one we soon learn that contentment and satisfaction bring peace and happiness. 

THE JOURNEY CONTINUES IN SOLITUDE

My brother-in-law upon watching the movie Sri Raghavendra back then in 1985 when it was released turned into a devotee or Bhakta of the saint overnight. Soon he gathered a few other devotees and used to conduct bhajans every Thursday hopping from one temple venue or hall to another. Later when the devotees suggested that they get a permanent place to worship their guru, he applied for a piece of land from the state government and soon built a wonderful prayer hall for Sri Raghavendra with public donations. It was officiated and opened to the public after its Prathistabana Maha Kumbajala Abhisegam on 12 June 2013. Thiru Sundara Arumugam has remained the faithful devotee of Sri Raghavendra to this day. That was the impact the movie had on him. Together with his daughter, Gowri Arumugam he has rendered a beautiful number recently, singing the grace of his Guru Sri Raghavendra, penned by Su. Vaasagan and composed by Jey Raggaveindra. 

Agathiyar at AVM was to go over and reside there but he changed his mind at the eleventh hour for reasons only known to him, and stayed with us, though he had a teacher contribute another statue of his in its place. He has been with us in our home as a bronze statue for the past 10 years coming to us on 2 January 2010. His "birthplace' was Swamimalai, Tamilnadu, India where he was commissioned and cast in bronze. Even before his arrival, when the directive to build a temple for him came through a Nadi reading, my very first in 2002, I scouted around and approached existing temples in my vicinity and their committees but none wanted him in their premises, stating various reasons for not allowing me to erect his temple in the very obvious empty spaces on their grounds. I then dropped the idea thinking it was not feasible and shall have to let go just as the fifty others who received a similar message in their Nadi readings prior to me did not see through this task too. 

After I returned from meeting my first guru Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai in 2003, he revealed his desire to build a temple for Lord Murugan in his village, some 8 kilometers away. I told myself that we shall see through this venture considering it as the task for me from my guru and as envisioned by Agathiyar in the Nadi. Opting for a ground nearer to Supramania Swami's guru Yogi Ramsuratkumar's samadhi on the Girivalam route, rather than in the outskirts of Tiruvannamalai, we built a kudil and just as we were to start on the temple,  a "stranger" came along and persuades him to drop the idea.   

Even before I began my tutorship with my second guru Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal in 2005, he had indicated his desire to build a temple for Agathiyar through fliers, one such that was made available to me by the Nadi reader in 2002. Tavayogi often spoke about buying the place where he had squatted on, building a small hut on it, and preaching the greatness of the Siddhas. Many events took place later and with the assistance of devotees from near and far, he saw the present Kallar Ashramam/temple/meditation hall complex materialize on a ground some 2 kilometers away from the earlier one. The Kumbhabishegam or குடமுழுக்கு / Kudamuzhukku or inauguration of the new was held on 16 December 2016. I thought that my contribution towards building a temple was over with the building of this Asramam by my guru. But it was not to be so.

In 2018, Lord Murugan in the Nadi told me that I had to build a temple for him. Later he sends Agathiyar to coax me into doing it. I did not want to carry out another similar venture as undertaken by my gurus. It did not appeal to me. I saw no reason to add another to the already existing numbers of temples and ashrams. As I did not move they told me that they shall see through it in 18 months. As the date of expiry arrived and there were no signs of it materializing, I was summoned for a Nadi reading. Agathiyar told me that there was no need to proceed and that they had tested me! What they did later was to strengthen the existing fort - their home. Having being pampered all this while, I had lamented to him that the current neighborhood, the environment, and the surrounding was not conducive anymore to begin meditating for a beginner like me. The original house owners have left; new owners and tenants have moved in; what was a dead-end street that serviced only the residents of this small housing estate of some 150 houses is considered the main road now after a small hillock was cut through linking it to other areas; and with Google map and Waze showing this access road as alternative routes to avoid the jam on other major roads, we have seen an increase in traffic these days. When I received the keys to my home in 1994 and moved in there was the mist that brushed our faces both in the mornings and evenings. Now they are gone. Dust and pollution have settled instead. I knew that I could neither change nor move things. In desperation, I went to him as a last resort. Agathiyar had a neighbor some doors away come over and offer to replace the broken window panes, the rusted iron and rotten timber frames that now kept the noise and smell away. Suggesting giving a facelift to the home and kitchen the neighbor then gave a new coat of paint and built a new kitchen counter. Air-conditions were installed through recommendations from another neighbor hence creating a conducive environment to pursue Agathiyar's wish for me to go within without any difficulty. I am a spoiled brat, am I not? I remember Tavayogi tell me that we have brought Agathiyar into our homes rather easily while he had to go in search of him the hard way. This was only possible by the grace of my gurus in physical form, Supramania Swami and Tavayogi and Agathiyar, Ramalinga Adigal, and all the other Siddhas together with the Gods and Goddesses in the Hindu pantheon.  

After starting with pilgrimages to temples to carry out remedies for my past deeds or karma in 2003 and brought to spiritual spots of the Siddhas by Tavayogi in 2005, henceforth a new journey began where we began to observe our conduct, speech, body, and mind, etc through puja or prayer; worship and rituals; and Yoga. An African proverb says, "Go in a group if you want to travel far; travel alone if you want to go fast." I can relate the journey that Agathiyar paved for us, to this proverb. Initially, we needed the crowd and numbers to begin the journey together, motivating one another, hence the reason he sent many to my home. My home became Agathiyar's home too. The name Agathiyar Vanam was coined later for easy reference. But as we progressed, the path narrowed and we finally stood at a bridge that would only allow one at a time to walk by. It was time to break up the group to facilitate this movement and it seemed like there was a sudden need to hasten the pace too. Having brought us this far together, he dispersed us to travel our own way from thereon. The proverb corresponds well with the stages Sariyai, Kriyai, and the first 4 Angas or limbs of Yoga that we traversed together. Soon the solo journey unfolded beginning with the later 4 Angas of Yoga that took a turn or reversed having us look within and finally arrive at the threshold of Gnana or Spiritual Wisdom. Agathiyar tells us that the experience gained in journeying within sitting in solitude and observing the breath leads us to Gnana. Observing the breath, we shall get in touch with our soul. We shall have touched the fringes of Gnana then. From thenceforth all questions are answered from within without the need to seek outside, be it from spiritual literature and sacred texts or spiritual masters. "You are the lab; the whole experiment is to go on within you," says Osho in his "The Book of Secrets." Bhogar is said to have experimented on himself the concoctions he prepared from herbs. 

Agathiyar raises the bar with each achievement of ours just as the bar is raised with each successful jump over the pole in the high jump. As such it is difficult to predict the end of this journey that we have undertaken following in the footsteps of our gurus and their teachings. Where does it all end? Only he knows. Ramalinga Adigal standing at the highest level of lifetime achievement possible tells us that there is more to it, that words cannot possibly express. What could these possibly be? These secrets are with the Siddhas. Paul Zweig in the introduction to Swami Muktananda’s "The Perfect Relationship", Syda Foundation, 1985, wrote that Swami Muktananda "felt that Gods ‘secret’ was not contained in any Sanskrit formula, ancient ritual, or technique of meditation; that severe austerities and physical deprivation would not reveal it. He felt that the ‘secret’ resided with great beings, with saints; they were themselves the ‘secret’ and he could learn what they were by loving them and sitting at their feet. After almost twenty-five years, he met Bhagawan Nithyananda." Paul Zweig writes, “In a flash of self-understanding he knew that he had found his other half; that now he was whole again.” Swami Muktananda now realized that the ‘secret’ was with the Guru and so the need for one to learn at the feet of such a Guru. 

Swami Shivananda of Rishikesh says,

“Let each man take the path according to his capacity, temperament, and understanding. His Satguru will meet him along the path. Listen to all, but follow one. Respect all, but adore one. Gather knowledge from all, but adopt the teachings of one master. Then you will have rapid spiritual progress. Once you choose your Guru, implicitly follow him. God will guide you through the Guru.” 

True to this saying, Thiru Sundara Arumugam was moved by the movie and became a devotee of Sri Raghavendra while I was called to the Siddha path by Agathiyar in his Nadi. It has truly being a blissful journey. 

ON SURRENDER 3

Agathiyar had pointed out to me earlier the need to know the science of the constituents of the body or உடல் கூறு தத்துவங்கள் before we even venture into meditation as directed and arrive at the pinnacle in attaining Gnanam or spiritual wisdom that arises at the end of this internal journey. He told me very clearly that I cannot possibly go within for it was not easy but yet he asked that I attempt to do so. Since then I have been giving much time to being with myself, alone and in solitude. Soon he worked on me and my home that has become his home too. To help me understand the concept further he asks that I read Tavayogi's books especially on the science of the constituents of the body or உடல் கூறு தத்துவங்கள். Ramalinga Adigal came later to asks if I was reading it? What is the significance and the importance or the relationship or relevance of this knowledge that they ask us to study before attempting to go within? Is it that an understanding of matter and the physical body is required to know the soul or Atma that is subtle? 

Tavayogi in his Atma Thattuvam writes, "உயிர் உடல் இரண்டையும் இணைத்து வைக்கின்ற ஒப்பற்ற கருவியே ஆத்மா எனப்படும்." P.Karthigayan in his "History of Medical and Spiritual Sciences of Siddhas of Tamil Nadu", Notion Press, 2016, says the same that the soul is the bridge between the spirit and the body. While the physical body is a result of all the elements of nature, the spirit is a spark from the source, and the soul that is of subtle matter is the bridge to both body and spirit. So it looks like the journey within is that of finding and knowing and bridging the two before the soul is realized. An understanding of the structure of the body is a prerequisite to an understanding of the inner journey. The subtle experiences that result from bodily changes bring a new understanding of the inner journey. Becoming aware of the breath and its movement brings us to merge with the breath. As Ramalinga Adigal mentions, remaining in this state of bliss (இன்பத்தில் ஆழ்ந்து கொண்டுவா) we finally are ablaze in effulgence (உன்னுள் ஜோதி எரியும்).

Sugha Pranav Swamigal has written, composed, and sung a wonderful piece in his music album "Saranaagathi" released by Symphony Recording Company, Chennai at https://www.deezer.com/en/track/11173212. 

"என் நினைவைத் துறந்து உடலைத் துறந்து குருநாதனே சரணாகதி தருவாய் அய்யா. "Is it in losing one's thoughts and awareness of his body, that the soul is found then? He pledges his surrender to his guru to bring him to this state. A friend sends a timely message, related to this. "Mounam, according to Sri Ramana Maharishi, is the absence of thought, and not absence of speech. This also was the diksha...சும்மா இரு, given by Lord Murugan to Saint Arunagirinathar."

While working on me Agathiyar worked on my home too that has become his home too. I love to clean and move things around, for only after you move them do you see the amount of dust that has come to accumulate over time behind these things. Dirt and squalor or the state of being extremely dirty and unpleasant, that is said to be due to poverty or neglect, can be symptoms of unhappiness or illness. Agathiyar had me cleanse my home even more thoroughly following his directive to a devotee. He says a clean home invites Kuberan, the guardian of wealth. Cleaning has now become addictive to me too. 

Shoukei Matsumoto, a Shin-Buddhist monk who belongs to Komyoji Temple in Tokyo, says that the cleaning practice is not only a tool but a purpose in itself and that there is no end to cleaning. Matsumoto in his book “A Monk’s Guide to a Clean House and Mind,” espouses the fact that cleaning is transformative and restorative both for the environment and for us. Cleaning applies to the mind too. "It is said that what you must do in the pursuit of your spirituality is clean, clean, clean. This is because the practice of cleaning is powerful. Cleaning practice, by which I mean the routines whereby we sweep, wipe, polish, wash, and tidy, is one step on this path towards inner peace. Similarly, right after I feel peaceful with my ego-less mindfulness, anger or anxiety begin once again to emerge in my mind. The ego endlessly arises in my mind, so I keep cleaning for my inner peace. (Source: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/jan/05/buddhist-monk-cleaning-good-for-you). Mahakavi Bharathi laments at not knowing the means to cleanse his soiled heart, hence surrendering to Goddess Ma, praying that she should do something about it as he was lost and helpless. He sings that he is disillusioned by all that he has read and pleads for Ma to come within and clarify, reinstating his faith and surrender to her and asking and seeking refuge at her feet, exactly what the wise man had asked Ramanan to do too. 

உலகத்து நாயகியே, -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

உன்பாதம் சரண்புகுந்தோம், -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

கலகத் தரக்கர்பலர், -- எங்கள் முத்து

மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்துமாரி!

கருத்தினுள்ளே புகுந்துவிட்டார், எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

பலகற்றும் பலகேட்டும், -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி! பயனொன்று மில்லையடி, -- எங்கள் முத்து

மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

நிலையெங்கும் காணவில்லை, -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

நின்பாதம் சரண்புகுந்தோம், -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

துணிவெளுக்க மண்ணுண்டு, -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

தோல்வெளுக்கச் சாம்பருண்டு, -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

மணிவெளுக்கச் சாணையுண்டு, -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

மனம்வெளுக்க வழியில்லை, -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

பிணிகளுக்கு மாற்றுண்டு, -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

பேதைமைக்கு மாற்றில்லை, -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

அணிகளுக்கொரெல்லையில்லாய், -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

அடைக்கலமிங் குனைப்புகுந்தோம், -- எங்கள் முத்து மாரியம்மா, எங்கள் முத்து மாரி!

Months before the outbreak of the COVID-19 pandemic he had me stay indoors, going out only for essentials. He made me dismantle the AVM and Amudha Surabhi (AS) groups and leave the other groups too at the peak of good times, the groups having grown in size as Agathiyar had envisioned. He made me sever the attachment to these by breaking loose from these groups and had his devotees carry on their worship in their individual homes as though foreseeing and in preparation for the coming of the Corona Lockdown. Today we see ourselves locked out even from places of worship and religious and spiritual establishments and have begun to embrace a new norm in conducting puja and prayer in our individual homes.

Before having me go within Agathiyar had me take a purgative, his Agathiyar Kuzhambu, for just one instant. That purged me for good or so I thought. I soon found out that it was not over as yet. I was given another concoction that I consumed for some 51 days before I gave up. These helped cleanse my internals, stabilizing the 3 dosas that had gone haywire as a result of intense heat that built up within, which was a result of putting into practice yoga asanas and pranayama taught by Tavayogi, over the years. The purging of these 3 dosas still goes on although without the need to take these magic portions these days. I am not sure where all this is leading. We think we have reached the finish line, end mark or milestone desired of him, but Agathiyar points out that there is yet another frontier to be conquered and that this journey is infinite. These days I have left off all attempts to achieve or reach out for there is no goal to achieve or an end to this journey. I decided to drop my attempts and efforts henceforth and let him work on me, as always. All flaws in me I believe shall fall or shed on its own. When you bring in the light the darkness leaves on its own. My friend shared another timely gem indicating that it is impossible to try or attempt to drop attachment without the grace and assistance from the divine. "The inward journey and the isolation required for progress on the Path, is verily, an Act of God." It shall take place on its own accord says Mahaperiyava or Jagadguru Shri Chandrasekharendra Saraswati Swamigal the Sage of Kanchi and 68th Jagadguru of the Kanchi Kamakoti Peetham. When the Gnani or realized one knows himself as the soul, maya and attachment leave him. He becomes detached. He is a then Jeevamuktan.

"ஸ்ரீ ருத்ரத்தின் இறுதியில், மஹா ம்ருத்யுஞ்சய மந்த்ரம் வரும்.... மிகப் பிரபலமானது.....“த்ரயம்பகம் யஜாமஹே ஸுகந்திம் புஷ்டிவர்தனம்.....உர்வாருகமிவ பந்தனாத் ம்ருத்யோர் முக்க்ஷீய மாம்ருதாத்.”

இதில் ‘உர்வாருகமிவ பந்தனாத் முக்க்ஷீய’ என்ற வரிகளின் அர்த்தம், ‘வெள்ளரிப்-பழம் அதன் கொடியி-லிருந்து விடுபடுவது போல, என் பந்தங்களி-லிருந்து நான் விடுபட வேண்டும்’ என்பதாக அமையும்..... 

எனக்கு வெகு நாட்களாக ஒரு சந்தேகம். எந்தப் பழமாயிருந்தாலும், பழுத்தவுடன், ‘பட்’டென்று தன் கொடி, செடி அல்லது மரத்திலிருந்து அறுந்து விழுந்து விடும்தானே! இதில் வெள்ளரிப்பழத்தை மட்டும் ஏன் இந்த மந்திரத்தில் குறிப்பிட்டு சொல்லப்-பட்டிருக்கிறது என்று. பல வேத விற்பன்னர்-களிடம் கேட்டும் த்ருப்தியான பதில் கிடைக்கவில்லை.....

பின் ஒருமுறை, மஹா பெரியவா இதற்கு ஒரு அற்புதமான விளக்கம் அளித்திருந்ததைப் படிக்க நேர்ந்தது..... 

அதாவது, மற்ற பழங்கள் போல் அல்லாமல், வெள்ளரிப் பழம் கொடியில் பூத்துக் காய்த்துப் பழுக்கும்..... வெள்ளரிக்கொடி, தரையோடு தரையாய்ப் படரும்..... அதனால், வெள்ளரிப் பழமும், தரைத் தளத்திலேயே பழுத்துக்கிடக்கும்..... அது பழுத்தவுடன், அதைச் சுற்றியுள்ள கொடியின் கிளைகள், இலைகள் போன்றவை தன்னால் (தானாகவே) அந்தப் பழத்தை விட்டு விலகுமாம்..... அதாவது, பழம் கொடியிலிருந்து உதிர்வதில்லை..... 

கொடிதான் பழத்தை விட்டு விலகுகிறது..... அதுபோல, ஞானிகளுக்கு, அவர்கள் பந்தம், பற்றை விட்டு விலக வேண்டும் என்பதில்லை. சரியான தருணத்தில், ‘இவர் பழுத்து விட்டார்’ எனத் தெரிந்தால், பந்தம், பற்று போன்றவை அவரை விட்டு தாமாகவே – எப்படி வெள்ளரிக் கொடி தன் பழத்தை விட்டு விலகுகிறதோ, அது போல விலகி விடுமாம்....."

We learn more at http://www.kamakoti.org/tamil/dk6-68.htm

அத்வைத ஞானி இங்கேயே, இந்த லோகத்திலேயே, சரீரத்திலே இருப்பதாகத் தெரியும் போதே ஆத்ம ஸாக்ஷாத்காரம் பெற்றவன். அதுதான் விடுபட்ட நிலையான மோக்ஷம் என்பது. ‘விடுபட்ட’ என்றாலும் இவன் ஒன்றும் விடுபடும் கார்யம் பண்ணவில்லை. இவன் பண்ணியது ஆத்மாவே குறியாக விசாரம் செய்ததுதான். அதனால் ஸாக்ஷாத்காரம் வந்து, தான் ஆத்மாவே என்று தெரிந்து கொண்டு அதுவாகவே இருப்பான். அப்போது பந்தம், ஸம்ஸார மாயை என்பது அதுவே கத்தரித்துப் போய்விடும். த்வைதம் நகர்ந்து ஓடிப்போய்விடும். வெள்ளரிப்பழம் பூமியிலே இருப்பது போல இவனும் லோகத்தில் முந்தி எங்கே இருந்தானோ அங்கேயே ஜீவன் முக்தன் என்ற பெயரில் தொடர்ந்தும் இருந்து கொண்டிருப்பதாகத் தெரியும். ஆனாலும் லோகத்தில் தனி ஜீவ மனஸின் வாழ்க்கை என்று வேரோடிப் படர்ந்திருந்த ஒரு கொடியோடு இவனுக்கு முந்தி இருந்த பிணைப்பு இப்போது கத்தரித்துப் போயிருக்கும். இவனாக விடுபடாமலே, இவனை விடுவித்துவிட்டு, அது ஓடிப் போயிருக்கும்! இதுதான் வெள்ளரிப்பழ முக்தி!

We understand that even devotion or Bakthi does not come without His grace. Manikavasagar mentions that Lord Siva came to stay in his thoughts and with His grace he pays homage to His Holy feet. He begins to pen or sing the Sivapuranam that he says shall bring the soul to a blissful state and end all past karma.

சிவன் அவன் என்சிந்தையுள் நின்ற அதனால் அவன் அருளாலே அவன்தாள் வணங்கிச் சிந்தை மகிழச் சிவ புராணம் தன்னை முந்தை வினைமுழுதும் ஓய உரைப்பன் யான்.

We are grateful that he has given us his thought. We are grateful that he has us think about him. We are grateful that he has come into our lives, our homes, and our hearts.

ON SURRENDER 2

Isaikavi Ramanan in his talk mentions a wise man told him once to drop his frantic search for means to cleanse himself for in doing so we are only looking further at ourselves, giving even more prominence and importance to this form, name, and self, bringing them into the spotlight and limelight. He adds that that is the reason we fail in our attempt as we cannot possibly do it. Instead, we should learn to look towards the divine for salvation. "Do not give importance to these impurities and dirt that you carry with you" continues the wise man. "Exhibiting arrogance on one hand and one the other, weeping for his grace, both amounts to building and strengthening the ego. It is not wrong to want to cleanse yourself but your approach is wrong" he told Ramanan.

We come with much dirt and begin collecting more. It is pointless and is a futile attempt trying to wash it away. "The only way is to throw it into the flames," the wise man says. This message worked for me. Since Agathiyar came into my home and my heart, he guided us on the techniques and methods to cleanse the body, thought, self, and soul. Agathiyar tells us that it is possible to do so by lighting the fire of sacrifice or Homam or Yagam or Yagna. This is a simple means to eliminate them drawn up for those who have time and the means to engage in rituals. The guru if he desires can burn the vasanas and karma too in several ways. This is for those who have a guru in the physical form. Yogananda Paramahansa tells us that all past vasanas and past karma is burnt in the fire of meditation. This is for those into meditation. Then there is the most simplest means by way of going on pilgrimages where the hike up the hills to these pilgrimage spots renders these even. In giving offerings, be it to the deity or the sacred fire or into the Homam or Yagam, we should learn to sacrifice our desires that culminate into and as fresh karmas; surrender all our obstacles and troubles that are brought on by our past deeds; and learn to place the flaws and weaknesses, pain and suffering, evil thoughts and deeds too into the fire. Equally, we should surrender all the merits gained in this and past lives at the feet of the divine. The divine only comes to us when we totally surrender and sacrifice our body, soul, and spirit to him/her/it - in other words let him take charge and rule. As long as we are in charge, the divine steps aside and only watches us go about our lives, struggling to overcome and put things right, yearning for bliss and peace, and yearning for love and happiness. 

Ramanan shares the two outcomes of associating with the divine: continuous bliss and peace. Devotion or Bakthi towards the deity of our liking goes a long way in healing, caring, and saving us. I am grateful to Agathiyar to bring me into his fold through my first Nadi reading. I took up the call and have come to see its results in this short and brief period of 18 years of worship and devotion to the Siddhas. Although we only began to realize his existence after the first Nadi reading where he spoke through this mysterious oracle, I have been made to realize that Agathiyar isn't new to me. In fact, he had been with me and my family all these while, since our inception, since our birth, and from our other past lives too. My wife took this birth as a result of her calling out for Agathiyar in pain while delivering her child in a past birth. My daughter was born again because as a flower girl in her past birth, she had garlanded Agathiyar at Thiruchendur. My other daughter, me, and my wife had served him fruits before we began the day's work of peddling them on the premises of the famed Kutraleshwar temple in Papanasam in a past birth. Hence we are told that these simple acts of remembering Agathiyar brought us to be born again. Agathiyar added that both my daughters then had asked that we should all be together again in another birth. As a result of it, we are all born again - together. Due to these prior ties with him, we were committed to carrying out Agathiyar's work in this life. 

Most of the time we are not aware of the presence of the deity or divine and the miracles he/she/it performs in our lives. I became more and more aware of him and the extent and role he played after having come onto his path. I realized that since day one he was in charge of my life. I was saved as an infant when he had his Chinese counterpart extend my life span simply on the condition my parents gave me in adoption to them. Till the age of 13, I went to the Chinese medium for all my illness and sickness. He would strike himself with the blunt edge of a sword and chant and burn a piece of yellow rice paper inscribed with Chinese characters and place the ash in a glass of water for me to drink. I would be cured. In school, I was granted a scholarship and later to pursue my tertiary studies which I very well understand to be due to his grace and his mysterious hand. I landed the job that I had served loyally for 36 years due to his grace and his mysterious hand. I landed my home that came by as a result of his grace and mysterious hand, which later came to be known as Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) with his coming. His love extended towards my family too. My daughter's broken leg wrapped in a fiber cast mended after nine months without the need to be operated on or rods placed within. Both my daughter and I recovered from the Dengue Fever with Agathiyar and Tirumoolar coming to raise the platelet count for her. 

Many years back, I had a wish after coming to read much about Agathiyar and Ramalinga Adigal. I wanted to see them both. Soon after getting to know Tavayogi in 2005, I expressed my desire to him. He told me that it will happen but quickly quipped "Is that what you want?" I knew that instant that something was wrong with my wish. "They will come", he said but asked me to reconsider my wish. I pondered for some time. Yes, he was right. If they were to appear and I were to see them, what next after that? I would talk about it to others for a few months till the excitement wears off. I would eventually be back to my old self and ways, doing the same routine. I understood that Tavayogi wanted me to seek something that was permanent and lasted forever. I changed my stand then. I wanted only Agathiyar. Worshipping him, we began to sense his presence: sitting among us, walking with us, dining with us, practically living among us at all moments. True to Tavayogi's words both Agathiyar and Ramalinga Adigal have come to guide us. If initially, it was through numerous Nadi readings, these days they speak their mind through several devotees. The divine whom we saw as God in Sariyai, then as Guru in Kriyai, has become a companion now, easily accessible and reachable, a result of having worshipped and chanted the names of the Siddhas and deities. This created a portal in our homes which bridged both our worlds for these divine visitations to take place  Although we can easily be tempted to ask for favors from them, Ramanan reminds us to be careful in asking God for boons and wishes. The Lord shall grant them but will leave us the very next moment he warns. Ask that we want and desire only him and nothing else, says Ramanan. This will bind him to us forever. 

Agathiyar began to shower his blessings and gifts, only to tell me later that he was testing me if I would settle for his gifts instead of him. Although there were the ingredients in the making of a Peedham over the years, I neither showed keenness nor interest in officially setting up one and take charge. He named my home as Vanam (Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia, AVM). Later when he came to rest and meditate at my home, he christened it Gnana Kottam. Lord Murugan upgraded Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia to Agathiyar Tapovanam (ATM) later. They all had visions for this place to grow. Indeed it did grow from a family home to later accommodate some fifty-odd devotees at times, who gathered to conduct, participate, or watch the puja and festivities carried out for Agathiyar. But deep within my heart I never wanted to take charge or be associated with any group, movement, society, or association. I preferred to remain contended with my home puja, having his devotees come over occasionally to my home (AVM) upon reading the Nadi or being shown to us or brought over by regulars to AVM to pick up on the worship of the Siddhas as did happen. When Agathiyar offered to gift his Nadi to me to be referred to when necessary and used for others too, I did not want it either. He began healing others through his presence but we wanted that to stop too. The idea of building a temple/moving home was subsequently dropped too as I refused to act on it. We did not want to be labeled in any way. He then began reinforcing his fortress, my existing home. Later he tells me all the offers made were to test me to see if I would fall for these gifts or continue my allegiance to him. Finally, he asked me point blank what I wanted since I had refused all his offerings. Not knowing what to ask and becoming blank momentarily as I did not expect him to ask, I ran through my little brain that is the organ of the mind, leafing through it into its deep recesses to find something worthwhile to ask for while Agathiyar waited patiently for my reply. I had all I wanted. What am I to ask for further? Having nothing to ask for, I thought serving him as I did now would make him happy and told him I wanted to be born again and again and serve him to my heart's content. He replied with a question "Is that what you want?" reminding me of Tavayogi. Tavayogi often cornered me with another question rather than reply to mine. I did not speak further. Agathiyar left it at that giving me time to think and ask wisely. When Agathiyar came again another day, I was surprised by him when he said that I had asked for Gnanam. I was taken aback because I had spoken over the phone earlier with Mahin about asking for Gnanam the next time he came around! Agathiyar had eavesdropped on our telephone conversation! He seemed pretty pleased with our asking I suppose for he went on to explain about Gnanam, telling us that Gnanam is not gifted by him but has to be earned and experienced. "When one goes within, as the journey brings upon these subtle experiences, these shall translate into and become Gnanam. As it defers from person to person, as such I cannot possibly define it" he says. 

"நீ என்னிடம் கேட்டது ஞானம். ஞானம் என்பது நான் தருவதல்ல. நீ கற்பது. ஒருவன் தனக்குள் உள்வாங்கி அவனுள் பயணம் துவங்கும் நேரம் அப்பயணம் தரும் பாதிப்பே ஞானம். அவை ஒவ்வொருவருக்கும் மாற்றம் பெரும். ஆகையால் அவை நான் இதுதான் என்று சொல்ல இயலாது."

Ramalinga Adigal confirmed this. He explains that when we fully understand ourselves and gain self-realization; when we understand the Ganangal or Bhuta Gnanangal; and come to finally realize that nothing is permanent, at that moment we shall enter and remain in the void of space (Vezhi Kadappathu). Everything dissolves into IT; a state of sunyam or void or silence. All that remains is existence or just being in the state of "Being" or Summa Erupathu. When we go within its silence is heard. No labels, forms nor sound. Just sheer existence.

"உன்னை நீ முழுதும் அறிந்து உன்னைச் சுற்றி இருக்கும் கணங்கள் அறிந்து எதுவும் நிலை அற்றது என்று நீ அறியும் அத்தருணம் வெளிக்குள் நீயே வெளி கடப்பாய். அத்தருணமே சும்மா இருப்பது."

Pon. Govindasamy in his "Vallalaarum Brahma Gnana Sangamum", Bharath Book Bureau, Chennai, draws a chain of evolution here. The souls that were once atoms took on the form of Bhuta Ganangal ("body of attendants" or "the company and assemblage or association of men formed for the attainment of the same aims" or "council or assembly convened to discuss matters of religion or other topics" (Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gana); appearing as minerals; taking on the forms of plants, animals, humans, achieve to become Jeevan Muktas. Thus the journey is already charted for every one of us. It is just a matter of space-time before it is attained or should I say reduced to its original form. 

அணுக்களாகயிருந்த ஆன்மாக்கள், பூதவர்க்கங்களாக உருவெடுத்துப் பின் தாது வர்க்கங்களாக மாறி, பின் தாவர வர்கத்தையடைந்து, பின் விலங்கு வர்க்கத்தில் புகுந்து, பின் மானிட வர்க்கத்தில் ஜனனம் எடுத்து, இறுதியில் ஜீவன் முக்தர் வர்க்கத்தில் பரிபூரண தசையையடைகின்றன.

We learn from the Sivapuranam, the song of God, penned by Manickavasagar that numerous births are taken to gather the experience, evolving from the lowest to the highest of creation. As the soul is on a journey of learning and gaining the experiences that it sought in the first place, each birth then is geared towards achieving Gnanam. The whole purpose of taking birth is to learn and experience and assimilate all the experiences and eventually arrive and attain Gnanam. One's learning is another's Gnanam. The experiences of one well-traveled become Gnana for a new traveler. Hence the reason why Tavayogi rather than preach to me on the Siddhas and their world, took me along on a journey of discovery, exposing me to their travels, the paths they walked upon, taking me to their abodes, Samadhis, and caves, getting me to experience miracles, giving me their Darshan, and creating opportunities to gain Gnanam from the journey, returning wiser. Goddess Ma gives us the good news, that we are allowed to make mistakes. The mistakes we make that become a lesson for us, becomes wisdom or Gnanam for others. Others shall learn from our mistakes. Ramalinga Adigal tells us that even the smallest inconveniences we face add to our Gnanam. The fruits of one's efforts towards spiritual attainment is Gnanam. 

Tavayogi has many definitions of Gnanam. Finding the source or start of birth and reaching the end or finale is Gnanam. Knowing the beginning and the end is Gnanam. Clarity in thought is Gnanam. The soul realizing the truth or self-realization is Gnanam. And finally, this Gnanam is God. 

பிறப்பின் தொடக்கத்தைப் பிடித்து முடிவையும் அறிவதே ஞானம். ஆதி அந்தக் குறி தெரிவதுதான் ஞானம். ஞானம் அடைதல் என்றால் அறிவின் தெளிந்த நிலை. ஞாலத்தை அறிதல் ஞானம். உயிரானது பெரும் உண்மைத் தெளிவுதான் அறிவு அல்லது ஞானம். ஆத்ம அறிவின் தெளிவே ஞானம். ஞானமே கடவுள்.

wikipedia.org defines Gnanam as "Knowledge inseparable from the total experience of reality, especially a total or divine reality (Brahman). 

Exhausting all our desires or dropping them, leads us to beget the grace of the divine that shall then remove the three impurities - Aanavam, Kanma and Mayai with minimum effort on our part, becoming pure in nature and one with Erai. Finally, we settle for the road back to our father's kingdom after having exhausted and seen all that needs to be seen. Having come through the cycles of birth and rebirth, we return to our father's kingdom finally in his image and nature. Ramanan quotes poet Kannadasan's plea, "Ma, you care for the thief, the gambler, the thug, and the prostitute alike but not me." The divine is neither indifferent nor bias. All births are tuned towards spirituality and are indeed divine births or Gnana Pirappu. Let us not judge another just because we think we are ahead in the game of snake and ladder. If the dice is favorable to us we advance; otherwise, we could plunge down and fall flat on our faces. We would be lucky to be alive and able to stand up and start the journey again. 

Gnanam is the wisdom of the wise just as the wisdom shared by the wise man with Isaikavi Ramanan. The experience of the Gnanis, Yogis, Rishis, Munis, and Siddhas has come to us as Gnanam or divine wisdom. Their experience gained on the path towards spiritual attainment becomes the essence and wisdom that is showered and given to seekers. Their wisdom went into the scriptures. Their experiments become wisdom for ours. Their trials and errors in perfecting procedures and techniques became wisdom to beginners. In simple terms, Gnana is the fruit of the guru's experience that the student partakes. All the Anubhuthis, the Tiruarutpa, the Thevaram, and the Siddha songs are experiences of highly evolved souls that become Gnanam for us who would choose to venture on the path. What we consider as works of Gnanam or wisdom is in actual fact experiences of our saints. The massive research that went towards the discovery and understanding of life and its purpose and the various paths leading back to the source by the saints has come to us as Gnanam. Summarized in a statement, the Siddha path is a path of learning. In short, experience culminates in wisdom. 

Ramalinga Adigal tells me effort is needed in going within that shall bring new experiences quite unlike that we have seen in our daily lives. He checks on us again whether we are heeding Agathiyar's directives and advice, hence charting the journey beautifully by posing several questions. Have you come to know the science of the constituents of the body? Do you sense changes within your body? Have you realized your internal journey? Do you realize the significance of Prana? And finally, he asks the million-dollar question of whether we are sustained and in the Prana, or if it traverses in us?  

"உடல் கூறு தத்துவங்களைத் தெரிந்துகொண்டாயா? தேக மாற்றம் உணருகிறாயா? உன் உள் பயணத்தை அறிந்துகொண்டாயா? பிரணவத்தின் சக்தி உணருகிறாயா? உன் பிரணவத்தால் ஊடுகிறாயா? அல்லது பிரணவம் உன்னுள் ஊடுகிறதா?"

ON SURRENDER

 

EXISTING THEN, NOW & FOREVER 2

I had never imagined that I would write a blog. But it just happened. Although my brother was very much into the English language and studied Shakespearean literature and took up a career in journalism eventually out of love for the language I was not lured by the language. But as my command of the Tamil language was poor and I had to take notes about my travels to India I decided to write and document them in English. I posted them on my websites in the late nineties. Amazed by the possibility of including media to accompany these words I picked up some basic HTML language sufficient enough to embed videos and animations meant to liven up the pages. With the advent of blogging things were simplified. Hence I opted to blog. 

Just as my brother runs a caption under his column in an online newspaper these days, that goes "A Kathirasen has spent 43 years in journalism typing under the illusion that people actually read his writings", I too have begun to ask myself if I am under an illusion that these posts are read by any. But luckily for me, the statistics provide proof and the numbers that indeed it is being read by many followers. Besides this, I receive an occasional call, message, or e-mail asking why there aren't any posts whenever I take a break. Following in his footsteps is my daughter who is studying Mass Communication. 

I am glad that this blog has served to enlighten others just as it had been enlightening me on various aspects of religion and spiritualism. Often falling back into the arms of the material world that brings much joy and pleasure for a short span of time I soon bounce back leaving this material world for a short retreat this time into the spiritual realm. This is the journey these days of shuttling between both worlds, the material and spiritual. When are we going to be anchored permanently in the spiritual realm? Even if we desire it this very moment Agathiyar puts it on hold for he says many still need to come by and visit him at AVM. Hence he has asked to put off the idea of total isolation for now. But it shall take place one day and the day shall be determined by him, he says. Till then I shall serve him in the only way I know, that is by sharing whatever is revealed to me through various means. I am learning too at the same time. For instance, the last post was written within minutes of reading the first few pages of Osho's book "The Book of Secrets" and after having been reminded of  Ramalinga Adigal's birthday through the many sharing of these reminders on social media. This prompted me to ask: Are we only going to keep sharing the messages, news, and miracles by the saints and never attempt to become one? Are we contended to dress like them and see it as rewarding enough? Are we going to perform puja year in and year out without becoming the object of the puja? Are we going to return to the master or guru again and again and sit around listening to his discourses within putting into practice what is being said or given? Are we going to seek gurus upon gurus and gather Diksha or initiations and exhibit them on our chests just as wartime veterans pin their awards or lapel pins? But while the veterans had served the army and the nation and deserve to be honored, initiation is only a catalyst for one to venture further into a new world and a new path. We still need to practice. Initiation does not replace practice as many think. There is much effort and practice to be placed before we can be honored by both the guru and the world. 

The child is first initiated into Sariyai by the parents. The guru then comes to initiate him into Kriyai and Yogam. Yogam leads him within and he discovers his true Self and attains Jnanam. There is an element of love in all these states. Love for the parents sustains the child on the path of Sariyai. Love for the guru makes him progress fast in Kriyai and Yogam. Finally love for the divine brings him to identify himself with his creator. From being a creation of the divine, living in the state of Salokam, that is of living in His world, and serving Him and His place of worship and serving the parents and elders, his family, and his nation, he makes quick progress when the guru comes along. He now serves the guru and indirectly his creator. He is elevated from servant to son. Making further progress the divine comes within reach or Sameepam. With further guidance from the guru and his concerted efforts in carrying out all the directives given, the divine brings changes within him making him into his form. He becomes divine in nature or Sarupam. Finally having stopped traversing between both worlds, the material and spiritual, the external and the internal, and resting in the divine he shall rest in the state of Sayujyam. This is the journey outlined for us. It shall eventually take place for all of his creation. Those who are determined shall achieve the state earlier while others' journeys shall be delayed by their seeking, personal agendas, preferences, desires, and karma. Even if we have exhausted all our desires and past karma and are ready to break the chain of death and birth, but if another soul desires something out of us we shall be born again to fulfill his or her desire. Hence it is of utmost importance to first fulfill all our responsibilities towards the parents, family, and society. Only then venture to know the Self or Soul. 

Just as Osho shares the discourse or rather question and answer session or truly the doubts that arise from within Dewi in the chapter "The Sutra", a reader shared a beautiful enlightening piece from "Anmiga Kalanjiyam" where Shiva enlightens the Shiva Ganangal. It rather surprises me now that this piece has come my way to shed some light on the nature of these Shiva Ganangal whom Agathiyar asked us to know and understand after first learning about the 96 Tattvas from Tavayogi's book "Andamum Pindamum." This discourse is between Lord Shiva and his Ganangal. When they ask Shiva who he was just as Dewi asks Shiva, "Oh Shiva, what is your reality?" in the Sutras, Shiva replies that when the soul that resides in all of his creation comes to know that it is complete or Sudha Paripuranam and is him, they shall know Shivam. Just as Dewi who identifies and is one with Shiva, receives the answers to all her doubts that she places before Shiva, the Ganangal are also reminded the same.

#சிவன்யார்? நீங்கள் யார்? என்று #சிவகணங்கள் சிவனிடம் கேட்க சிவன் அளித்த பதில்.

இந்த உலகில் மனிதருள், தாவரங்களுள், விலங்குள், பறவையில் எல்லா உயிர்களுக்குள் இருக்கின்ற இந்த ஆத்மா முழுமையாகும் அதுவே (நான்) #சிவம்.

முழுமையானது தான் முழுமையானவன் என்று தெரிந்து கொள்ளாது, தன்னை பார்க்காது, தன்னிலிருந்து வெளியே பார்த்து, தான் யார்? என்று ஆராய ஆரம்பித்து விடுகிறது.

முழுமையானது ஆணும் பெண்ணும் கூடப்போய் கருவறை கருவில் தங்குகிறது. கருவாக தங்குகிற வரையில் அது முழுமையாய் இருக்கிறது.

மெல்ல உருமாறி ஏழாம் மாதம் ஆண் என்றோ, பெண் என்றோ பின்னப்படுகிறது. இரண்டுமே அது தான். ஆனால் அதற்கு தெரியவில்லை .

ஆண் என்று பின்னப்பட்டது தான் இழந்து விட்ட அந்தப்பெண்ணை தேடுகிறது.

பெண் என்று பின்னப்பட்டது தன்னிலிருந்து வெளிப்பட்ட அந்த ஆணைத்தேடுகிறது.

கருவாகி கரு உருவாகி வெளியே வருகிறது. உருவாகி வெளியே வந்த பிறகு ஆணின் அணைப்பிற்கு பெண்ணும், பெண்ணின் அன்பிற்கு ஆணும் ஏங்க தொடங்குகிறார்கள்.

கருவறைக்குள் முழுமையாய் இருந்தேனே என்று மறுபடியும் கருவறைக்குள் போகும் முயற்ச்சியை கூடல் என்கிறார்கள்.

மறுபடியும் அவர்களிடம் இருந்து ஒரு சக்தி வெளியாகி முழுமையாய் ஒரு கருப்பையில் தங்குகிறது மறுபடியும் பின்னப்படுகிறது. இது அளவிலாத விளையாட்டு. இது இடையறாது நடக்கும் தொழில். இது எப்போது முடிவடையும்?

காற்று வெளியே போனால் சிவா. உள்ளே போனால் வாசி. உள்ளே போகும் மூச்சை கவனிக்கிற போது மனம் ஒருமுகப்படுகிறது.

உள்ளே இருப்பது யார்? என்று பார்க்க இயலுகிறது. உள்ளே இருப்பது முழுமை.

பின்னப்படாத ஒரு முழுமை என்று புரியும் போது, பிறக்கும் ஆசையும் பிறப்பதற்காக செய்யும் முயற்சிகளின் ஆசையும் குறைகிறது.

ஆனந்தம் உள்ளே இருக்கிறது. அது வெளியில் உள்ள பொருட்களில் இல்லை என்பது தெளிவாகிறது. அப்போது பொருட்கள் இருந்தாலும் இல்லாது போனாலும் ஒன்று என்ற நிலை வருகிறது. வெறும் உயிர் வாழ்தல் மட்டுமே சாதாரணமாக நடக்க மரணம் எளிதாகிறது.

மரண பயமில்லாமல். கலவரமில்லாமல்.

ஆனந்தமாய் இருக்கும் போது மறுபடியும் பிறக்க வேண்டிய அவசியம் அந்த ஆன்மாவிற்கு ஏற்படுவதில்லை. அது அசைவற்றது ஆகிறது. அதுவே #சிவம் ஆகும்.

நன்றி.

ஆன்மீக களஞ்சியம் நூல்.

Its translation to the best of my ability follows.

The most complete or comprehensive soul, not realizing its true state begins to differentiate itself, and instead of looking within at its self, begins to look out to realize its nature. It joins the man and women in her womb, residing there henceforth till its form changes and is identified as male or female in the seventh month. If it takes the form of a male it begins to search for its female counterpart and vice versa. Having taken birth the female portion sought to embrace the male portion while the male portion yearns and sought the love from its female portion seeking completeness again as it once shared in the mother's womb. Another soul comes together as the male and female come together and merge and the chain is extended. This is His play. Is there no break in this chain? When shall it come to a halt? 

The air that leaves us is Shiva (siVaa). That which comes within is Vaasi. Paying attention to the incoming breath tames the mind and makes it settle. Only when the mind subsides do we begin to recognize the tenant within. What resides within is completeness or Suddha Paripuranam. It is only when one feels that he is inadequate or not complete that he seeks elsewhere for fulfillment or completeness. When one realizes that he is complete by nature the desire to be born again subsides too. The attempt to be born again subsides. He understands that bliss is not in the external but within oneself. He is not shattered or disturbed with gain or loss. Death is acceptable to him. No fear or fuss of death arises. As he is in a state of bliss he does not desire to be born again. He settles down. That is the state of Shivam.

EXISTING THEN, NOW & FOREVER 1

Osho in the first chapter of his book "The Book of Secrets", published by OSHO International Foundation, Switzerland, 1974 states that "theories become meaningless; and that experience becomes the center." In explaining tantra, Osho says that it is neither intellectual nor philosophical. Doctrines are meaningless for tantra is concerned about the method and the technique and the path. Osho says there is no change required or transformation taking place in understanding concepts and the philosophy behind things but in tantra, you need a change or rather a mutation. 

Goddess Ma told us a similar thing, that the Siddha path was one of learning and gaining lessons from the experiences we go through. Our experiences become jnana or spiritual wisdom to others, she added. It seems true for we seek the elders for advice since they have lived long enough to have seen many things take place. 

It is pointless to gather every Thursday to come together in worship of the Siddhas if we do not strive to become one. It is pointless to celebrate their Jayanthi or day of descent; or Samadhi or day of ascension annually if we do not strive to attain a similar state. It is pointless to host festivals in the name of the divine if we do not strive to become divine ourselves. All adherence and compliance to rituals should lead us to change and transform into a divine person rather than have us perform the same task year in and year out. All these should only serve as stepping stones to bigger things in life - in our spiritual journey. This is how the Siddhas went through the process of change and transmutation, from man to divine. The Siddhas expect us to do so too, through following the path, the method, and techniques. And so we seek the gurus who have walked the path. Tavayogi took me on the path of the Siddhas, engaging me to do rituals, and practice yoga asana and pranayama. All these shall aid one to eventually go within as we saw it too. These are only tools to bring one within. One should not remain forever executing them, or stagnate in these states. It is never life-changing if we are to sit under the shadows of the guru forever. A true guru would let go of the lease or leash so that the student can explore for himself and grow into a guru too. 

This is the reason Agathiyar has put a stop to all that he had us do earlier. The hands-on experience and learning that came along with worship and the rituals involved and acts of charity were sufficient to push us ahead and into bigger and more expansive frontiers. All these while we have been doing some soul-searching. It is now time to dive deeper into the soul. We need to address the soul now just as the Siddhas do. Only through getting connected with the soul can we bring ourselves to understand the self better and attain self-realization. This is Atma Jnanam or wisdom of the soul. He is then a Jeevanmukthan who has attained mukti or realization while still alive. 

Experience aids in achieving this state. After the experience, you shall never be the same. Battered and tattered he realizes himself to be beyond pain and suffering, joy, and happiness. He realizes that he is beyond all opposites. He is just being here - existing, then, now and forever. Only love for the divine brings us to ascend beyond this duality. As Osho says only in love oneness is felt, hence the reason we see the saints pair themselves as a female in love with the divine.