STEP OUT OF IT

The above song lyrics are one that I believe blossomed from the lyricist's experience and what he saw around him which we acknowledge too. Agathiyar, when he cornered me asking what I desired, after a brief moment of thought and as he was waiting for me to answer, I told him that I would take birth again and again and serve him. But he shot me down by telling me to look around me and see what was going around. I was puzzled. The next time around when he asked again, I was more prepared and asked for the state that Tavayogi had told us to attain - that of Gnana. Agathiyar shot me again. Gnana is not given nor gifted or sanctioned but has to be earned by traveling the distance he says. Both Supramania Swami and Tavayogi tell me that with persistent effort one day the vessel shall shine. The vessel when ready to house the divine - the divinity that once occupied the stone images and pictures - then moves within us. Soon this divinity is seen in others too and we realize that we are connected as a network in this vast framework or matrix of time and space. Moving further back into this space we begin to connect with our ancestors and lineage of gurus. Then we become one with prapanjam reaching beyond the confines of the mind and embracing all of creation. But for all this to take place the starting point is this vessel, our body, and mind. This had been wonderfully depicted in the closing scene of the movie "Lucy". 

The doctors at times when we are low in self-esteem and energy, tell us that there is a Vitamin and Mineral deficiency and give us some supplements to boost it. The gurus come along to perk up the energy levels in our chakras with their touch and look when it's low. Speakers take the stage and motivate us. They boost our spirit through their talks. Similarly, AVM in the past had sought Master Arunan to remove the obstacles on the path of the flow of these energies of several devotees and revitalize them by physically attending to their Varma points. Master Uva on his part helped remove and clear the energy blockages and heal their chakras. I remember bringing my daughter to the chief priest at the Buddhist Maha Vihara in Brickfields many years ago. Though the doctors had given her a clean bill, my daughter was distressed thinking she had something stuck in her throat. Hearing our plea he placed his palm on my daughter's head. With lips closed, he made a low, steady continuous sound like that of a bee. It was the chant of the sacred syllables AUM. Another practitioner of energy healing held her hand over my daughter's chakra points and when she came to her throat the hand fell on its own accord.

Those who have learned the tricks of the trade turn to engaging in rituals like fire-worship, puja, and chanting of mantras themselves to correct these imbalances. The late Dr.Krishnan told me that the body can heal by itself given time and with some assistance if there is a need. It is true that the body is amazing having seen it heal wounds and recover from ailments with some assistance. Since basically, we are one with nature we need to go back to nature for a cure or to reestablish the balance in our systems. But the sages and saints knowing the secret to tapping into the Prapanjam managed to heal their bodies with the assistance of Nature and the Universe. There are many such sages and saints though they could tap into the cosmos and the cosmic energy and revitalize and heal themselves, chose to volunteer, and instead were willing to take on the pains and sufferings of their disciples and devotees, bearing the pain and agony for their sake. 

Taking a walk in the woods revitalizes us. Just being near a waterfall or water source electrifies us. If a man begins to look back and look up towards nature he could reverse himself back to his original state. I guess this is the reason the sages and saints of old sought to hide in the caves and jungles. But the reverse is prevalent these days with modern-day gurus establishing facilities that bring on further comfort to their followers rather than have them hit the dirt track. Agathiyar in my second Nadi reading that came three years later in 2005, on seeing that I had returned from a pilgrimage of temples and followed all his directives given in the first, directed me to Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal and his Kallar ashram. Tavayogi on his part volunteered to bring me to the places and abodes of the Siddhas. We took a walk into the jungles and spent our nights in caves. We dipped in the mineral-rich rivers that had their source in the Western Ghats. Agathiyar wanted me to experience ashram life too having me put up at Kallar ashram for several days. It was pretty interesting and something I never dreamt of. I am grateful to Agathiyar and Tavayogi for giving me this experience. For one who sought to know Siddha worship and looked around for guidance in vain, Agathiyar tied the knot with Tavayogi. I learned Siddha puja at his Ashram. Later when Tavayogi and Mataji conducted a puja at my home during their visit to Malaysia in 2010, I picked up from them the art of doing libation to Agathiyar and fine-tuned the homam or lighting of the sacrificial fire watching them do it. This was the first step in bringing the Siddhas into our homes. Later showing us yogasanas and pranayama, Tavayogi took us to another stage. That is how we grow and nurture this body to become an alayam or temple for divinity to reside in. But sadly we are satisfied with worshipping him externally, making regular visits to his place of worship or temple or abode, and placing our grievances before him and leave still carrying the load on us. 

Sages and saints had visions and darshans and revealed what they saw. These were later translated into images. God was given a form then that we have since begun to worship. An author who wrote a book about Vegan cooking was asked by a potential buyer if her book had lots of pictures or photos. Visuals work better than words. We might not comprehend the extensive songs of Ramalinga Adigal that stand at some 6,955 in Ponneri Sundaram Pillai's publication, but a song of his set to music sinks deep into our hearts and soul. These days his songs trigger something within us. Now I realize why Tavayogi told me that listening to his songs shall bring us to the state of Gnana as I played his songs in the car while driving Tavayogi to Bukit Rotan when he was in Malaysia back then. Media is far-reaching, especially videos. The latest findings say that people tend to watch videos more and above every other media. 

The Gods who are said to be residing in the heavens were brought to the earth by sages and saints of the past through deep contemplation and meditation often moving into the deep state of samadhi or oneness with the source and origin or creator. Temples and places of worship mushroomed later around them and above their samadhis. The idea of having us visit these places of worship is to reconnect with the source and bring divinity within us. But we fail to do that. Rather we visit them and start doing rituals. We stay till the last rituals are done and they are put to sleep and return home only to revisit them again. 

How many of us invite them into our house? We do not even want to light a lamp at the altar much less sing their praise. The idea of having altars and lighting a lamp in our individual homes is to invite divinity into our homes. Supramania Swami told me to keep the flame going for he shall watch me through it. The deity Karupanasamy who came into a cousin of my colleague kept mentioning the flame and pointing to a nearby temple that he asked to send over. Upon alighting from the car, he walked into the temple and asked him to light camphor, and "left" his cousin's body. Ramalinga Adigal who attained the higher states of the soul and bodily evolution was lost for words to describe even higher reaches of the Lord's kingdom. He was saddened that he had failed in his attempt to change people and their mindsets and failed in his efforts to elevate them to these higher levels of attainment that he had experienced. He told them that though the locals had shunned his teachings it shall be picked up by those in other nations. Seeing that rituals and temple worship were only the means and a stepping stone to knowing one's soul and to higher things in the spiritual realms, he wanted to bring them out of rituals that had shackled them for far too long. He showed them that it was possible to transform one's body and soul to that of light and transcend the universe and merge in all of creation and finally return to the source. For this purpose, he built the Satya Gnana Sabai for men who could not visualize the higher teachings. Here the Jothi that is both with form and without is worshipped. In the final moments of his departure, he addressed his followers in frustration, as they would not change their ways, he gave them the lamp and the flame he used to worship. He gave his followers a simple way to redeem and save their souls and attain salvation realizing that they were not ready for his teachings. 

Someone in distress was told by several messengers that Agathiyar and the Siddhas were waiting outside her home for an invitation from her to come in. When there are those to whom he has made known that he is waiting outside their homes for an invitation to come in, with us he arrives even without a calling these days. Even before we are gathered for his event, he arrives ahead of time and dictates what needs to be done. 

One might ask what is the difference between temple worship and Siddha worship. One distinctive difference that I noticed after engaging in both is that the temple though is a place built for the public to converge and worship, worship here is still centered around each individual. For instance, we are asked our birth sign and star as we stand before the Lord in the temple having bought a token for "archanai", where a simple chant/song/recitation is then conducted on our behalf by the priest. The priest is a middleman here asking the deity to grant us favors and fulfill our individual wishes. So is it with the lighting of yagams that are conducted in temples for our individual wants to be fulfilled. These are conducted on occasions like moving into a new home and at our weddings too. It is all rather self-centered and for the individual concerned. On the other hand, sitting in at a Siddha Homam and conducting the fire ceremony is for the good of all of the creation rather than for the individual, says Agathiyar. The Siddha puja envelops the whole of Prapanjam. 

Even the godmen and those serving God are in delusion. It takes guts to admit that one does not know. When many these days seem to have answers to everything, Tavayogi replied he did not know when I asked him what Ramalinga Adigal meant when he sang in numerous places of his Thiruarutpa that the "dead shall arise". The song "Kadavulum Naanum" is very relevant, especially in these times where the innocent is a victim of many scams and treachery, where it seems the evil has the upper hand and the divine is seen to be helpless. But even the Gods tend to sit back and watch the unfoldment of the monstrosity that humanity had created. But this song should not be construed as asking us to abandon temple worship, rituals, and other tools. The first line itself clearly defines the state of the lyricists. "KADAVULUM NAANUM PESIDUM POLUTHU TARAGARGAL YETHARKKU" translates to "When I am conversing with God why do I need middlemen?" For one who has begun to speak to God indeed why does he need middlemen? It is applicable only and only when we attain that state. Until then we need all the means and tools. This is akin to Sivavakiyar's state where attaining godhood he condemns all forms of worship and even writes off the belief in rebirths.

Asking us to come to the path of the Siddhas in the Nadi reading, Agathiyar gave us a list of names of Siddhas to be worshipped, courtesy of the Nadi reader Senthilkumar during the thanksgiving ritual for the Nadi reading, "Naadikku Dhaanam". We ventured to know more. Our understanding then expanded. We engaged in rituals and charity. Soon it was all brought to an abrupt halt coinciding with the coming of the lockdowns after the Covid virus emerged in December of 2019. With the pandemic being a reason for everyone to stay indoors, Agathiyar wanted each home to become his Vanam or garden, each home turning into Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia or AVM. Once the lockdowns and restrictions were lifted, now Agathiyar himself has offered to visit the homes of his devotees and has left it to his devotees as to how they wanted to usher him and attend to him while there. My wife too understands what had transpired in this journey of ours. She shares her understanding. She says Agathiyar saw through the curtain and knew that we had become addicted to these rituals and the acts of doing charity. She says we were getting high on puja and doing charity looking forward to the next occasion or event that would take place. Agathiyar's devotees were hooked to the idea of coming over to AVM for all their spiritual needs and becoming dependent on external tools. He saw through this danger and snapped it in the bud. 

She adds that when we started we saw Agathiyar outside in the forms that were conveyed and passed on to us by our ancestors. We carried the tradition not willing to question or break it. Today we truly understand what Tavayogi meant when he told us to step out of Bakthi or devotion and come to Gnanam or the journey within. We had to let go of our addiction to puja and charity and seek him in his abode within the vessel, that is the body, now. Agathiyar had us go on an external journey undertaking a pilgrimage first. We had first-hand experience of the bliss and also disappointments on this journey. Later he had Tavayogi take us on a pilgrimage and adventure of a different kind to his abodes. These were true moments of extreme bliss. Today he has asked us to step within to realize even greater bliss that is waiting to awaken from within. The guru came to show us that God was residing within for those ready to go on this internal journey. 

REMINISCENCE

Switching us off in 2019 and getting us to sit at home with the rest of the world in view of the pandemic Agathiyar has arisen to move to the homes of his devotees. I guess it is for the sake of exposing the kids to the path this time around. Agathiyar has moved away from the norm and decentralized AVM. His wish is to see every home become Agathiyar Vanam. And so he broke his devotees' dependency on a center. Neither did I want my home to turn into a center. I believed that Agathiyar shall grace the homes of all devotees who call out to him just as I did. For the past 2 1/2 years, he saw to it. Today I understand his calculative moves to build and destroy even this group. He taught us non-attachment. For that matter, AVM was a loose group of devotees getting together to worship and do his work. Today the buck has been passed on to these youngsters who made the core of AVM to groom their children. These kids growing up in our homes need our guidance. They had come taking up residence in the homes of parents who prayed to the Siddhas. They have to be groomed now after a break of 2 yrs that coincided with the several lockdowns in place as a result of the pandemic. For this purpose, Agathiyar is visiting his devotees again in their homes having libation or abhishegam and the fire ceremony or homam performed.

Everything has been said. Has been told. There is nothing much to add. Now it is time to reflect on his words and live the life that he envisioned for us rather than live according to our wishes. Agathiyar walked the earth in the past to bring balance just as there is talk about balancing the scales in Marvel's screen adaptation of the comic book "Moon Knight". We often speak about uplifting experiences. When the Siddhas come within it is literally an uplifting experience. We lose our guard or awareness of the moment and are lifted off our feet in these rare moments of bliss. 

Intellectual pursuits might bring in money, recognition, fame, and recognition and satisfy the ego. It might bring some good to the masses too. Now I truly understand why Supramania Swami told me back then in 2003 when I met him for the very first time that there are three things one should either keep secretive or do it secretly. Sex, taking food and puja, or conducting prayers. I was taken aback then asking myself how I was to adopt these three. It is impossible. For sex, you need another partner. Food is usually taken in the midst of family and friends, colleagues, and strangers too at events or eateries. Puja is in the company of others too. Today I understand his words pretty well. What he meant was all three bring on satisfaction to the soul going beyond the senses. Sexual satisfaction that is satisfying to the flesh, body, and senses takes on another paradigm shift and satisfies the soul moving from chitrinbam to perinbam when one arrives at a state that Swami mentions. He did not stop me from indulging in the act. Never have I read Ramalinga Adigal stop us. While the former recommends engaging in the act on full moon nights the latter recommends fortnightly.

Food too has become auspicious and sacred not only filling our stomachs but has gone beyond the tongue that tastes them going beyond the throat and stomach and beyond making flesh and blood. Going beyond the state of satisfaction brings on a state of experience where it reaches the farther reaches of the entire constitution that we are made of. Agathiyar explains that in his state he is feeding the elements or buthas. Food in the form of prana-packed air around us leads us there. Pranayama done consistently shall bring us to a state where we engage with the prana all around henceforth taking it in without the need for these practices later on. It is as if we switch on the gear to inhale all the goodness of prana around us.

In puja we sing the praises of God by belting divine numbers. We tend to ask why does God need to be praised as put forward by a seeker to me. Agathiyar came to answer him only recently that they do not need our praise. On the contrary by doing so changes take place in us at the level of the cells and atoms. Vibrations begin to happen that bring on a multitude of forms and sounds that transform the very self. We become transformers bringing on the energy turning into energy vortexes and in turn help spread to others at times healing their souls and bodies too. These songs later transcend the joy that is apparent in listening to our favorite song and singer and alter the height of reception connecting with the divine music out there in the universe.

Sex, Music and Food bring on extreme satisfaction and completeness or puranam to the ailing soul. The touch of a partner, the care of the parents, the soothing words of a friend, and the encouraging words of our mentors all bring us out of the rut that we are in. The guru comes to lift us up further. Agathiyar tells us that he was only delivering the teachings and practices that the Siddhas themselves had carried out and experimented on. Hence I believe it was not wrong for me to drive away a curious psychologist and a reader of this blog, who wanted to lay me on the couch and reach into my mind to establish his hypothesis that I was hallucinating when I shared many a conversation that Agathiyar had with us in this blog. I told him to carry out everything I had practiced and find out for himself rather than establishing findings based on others.

The Siddhas are very much down to earth. I was surprised to hear that Bhogar had spoken about the flesh trade that flourished in a neighboring country. A devotee was told by Agathiyar that he did not mind his photo kept in his bedroom. The Siddhas never alienated any woman who menstruates in their puja. 

Water breeds all kinds of creatures. How us that vegetarian? Plants take in the minerals from the soil that is a result of numerous other once-living but now dead creatures breaking down eventually and decomposing into the soil. The air we breathe carries numerous minute creatures too. I guess when Ramalinga Adigal realized that there is nothing actually vegetarian in nature he looked towards the skies for drinking water, drinking the rainwater even before it touches the ground and is polluted or before fishes and amphibians appear and begin to live in it. He advocates that we drink rainwater too. But our air is so polluted with industries thriving.

One thing I learned traveling with my gurus on the path of the Siddhas is that nothing falls from the skies at least initially and that we have to slog and work towards it. Tavayogi says our efforts are till the second chakra svadhistana. Thenceforth they shall raise us up. Supramania Swami too told me that we shall polish the ware till it shines. Today after traveling some 20 years we can sit back and reap the gains of our ventures thanks to the grace of the gurus and the Siddhas. 

Bringing us to do rituals he had us step out of it and go within. Bringing us to do charity he had us leave it behind too. He made us realize that each one of us is serving be it God or mankind or plants and animals in their own capacities. We are serving each other in numerous capacities. But talk about serving we only limit ourselves to those in the religious ways serving God or those serving man and beast on humanitarian grounds. We fail to realize and give credit to people who do serve others by going about their daily life and occupations too. We forget to thank the rubbish collector. We forget to thank the other road users who drive carefully saving us from mishaps. We forget to thank the medical profession that is on stand by 24/7 caring for our needs. So how do we return the favor? What we can do is to go beyond our routine and jobs and help others too with our knowledge. 

Do not carry the bitter past that is ingrained in us due to constant recollection. Neither carry the baggage and can of worms. The evolution of species can be divided into two categories. The amount of love for others serves as a yardstick. Man who is full of love is seen as a divine being or deivam by family, friends, society, and community. Animals that return the love towards humans are said to take on a human birth at some time in the future. On the other hand, a man who is a pest or parasite in society might slide back down the ladder and take on an animal birth. An animal that is a danger and pest to others will need to take several births before attaining the height of human birth. That which determines our next birth is I suppose love.

We do not have a face. What we see of ourselves is a reflection in a mirror or water. In the movie "Dune" we hear the advice of a grandfather shared. He had said that great men do not seek power. Instead, he is called to. We understand it as when villains seeking power cause widespread damage. Here then the hero accidentally happens to be in the wrong place and is bestowed powers.

I was happy to receive a call from a friend who told me life was good for him now. After landing a much-needed job that paid sufficiently for him to settle all his past debts he paid his gratitude to Agathiyar. He continues his home puja and conducts puja at Agathiyar temples. He continues his yoga practices and his charity programs. Life could never be better he tells me as he had shared the past life that had taken a toll on him earlier. It is rare to come across those who give thanks to the divine. We think we deserve his kindness and mercy forever. We take control of our lives all live long and only allow him for a moment into our lives as we stand before him at the altar or temple and expect him to help us out in times of trouble. When nothing materializes according to our wants we condemn him for not helping out and even question if he was around. In reading the Nadi we are told that our lives revolve around our karma. We fail to realize that the divine cannot intervene for we have to live it out. But when we surrender to him he knows what needs to be done henceforth. Many show their anger towards him when they are threatened with illnesses and their lives take a beating. How fair is it for us to blame the divine when we do not take care of our health and lives or make wrong choices in life? 

Watching the movie "Sound of Metal" made me recall my fear when I thought I was losing my hearing several times. A fear would set upon me and I would pace my home desperately blowing my nose and doing pranayama hoping it would clear. Similarly, a sudden fear for no reason would arise in me waking me from my sleep many a day. Agathiyar in asking me to go within also placed lots of obstacles and hurdles for me to clear. I failed miserably. Just as I thought I should sit in meditation as he has asked us the clanking of the pots and pans from the neighbors who would decide to start cooking just then. Or a neighbor would drill into the wall or knock and bang something just then. The din and noise from the neighborhood children banging the wall and letting out screams would upset my meditation and I would arise to leave. Just as I think about getting some fresh air and opening up my windows the smell of cooking rajasic food from the neighbors or the stench of the neighbors' cats that chose to go in our garden reaches my nose. I would frown at Agathiyar and get angry at times initially. Later I began to congratulate him for his mischief in seeing that my venture in following his directive fails. He was sabotaging me. He was testing me. Ramalinga Adigal comes to tell me that all these shall lead one to gain Gnana or reach that state of impartiality. 

In the "Sound of Metal", Ruben who is a metal band drummer loses his hearing fast. His girlfriend sends him over to the home for the deaf. He is given a separate room and told to just sit and have his morning coffee at 5am by the caretaker. In the event he can't sit doing nothing, he is told to write. Similarly, there are some rare moments when I can go beyond sitting for some minutes, many answers come to my mind and I resign to start jotting them down less it passes by in a flash. Later I would expand these notes and write by post.

The caretaker of the school for the deaf comes around later asking Ruben if he had ever experienced a stillness that prevails in these moments of silence. He goes on to tell him that the place, where stillness is, is the kingdom of God and that it never abandons him. He says further that his house is built on trust and if that is violated anything can happen. How true. How far do we trust God? Instead, we go ahead and mend things and worsen them.

The movie "Sound of Metal" made me appreciate hearing. I guess that is how my aged mother hears too for she has lost her hearing as we have to speak up. I still have a fear of losing my senses and my eyesight, hearing, taste, speech, thinking memory, and mobility. In my younger days I used to hover close to the ceiling and look down at myself, my brother, father, sister's, and mother sleeping. I would then sway violently from one corner to another and dive into my body. I never knew what was happening then. Some tell me that could this be an out-of-body experience.

There we several moments of discomfort that I asked myself if it was due to my age reaching  63, the vaccine that I took for covid, or whether it was subtle changes that Agathiyar brought on from within. These are the times I missed Tavayogi. He has to be here now so that I can fall back to him and enquire about these changes that are taking place within me and in my thoughts.

Giving hope to live to another is great dharma. Agathiyar often does this too. Just as the blind man asks a young boy contemplating suicide to describe the surroundings, and just as a blind inmate of an adjacent cell in the prison gives hope to a young boy remanded for several days in the jail by describing the world beyond the walls of the prison, when he is asked to describe what he saw through the open window, Agathiyar gives us hope too. In the former, the lad begins to see the world anew and drops his intention to take his life. In the latter, the kid is surprised to find out that the one who narrated to him the outside world while in prison was blind.

Agathiyar says that the greatest dharma that even goes beyond service and feeding is to spread the word of the guru. Know our purpose. There are 4 ways to do it. The Nadi, guru, in deep meditation or after a near-death experience. Know it before our life comes to an end.

The mountain is a mountain again. I have come one full cycle. I have done many stupid things in life. Now it is time for payback and to correct the wrongs. Otherwise one needs to come back again just to do these in another future birth.

FILLING THE GAP

Karl Hagström writes, "I have developed this app (Easy Photo Organizer - A simple and really efficient Windows program that lets you go through thousands of photos to decide which ones to save and which ones to delete) to help me with the enormous task of organizing huge amounts of photos fast and efficient". He goes on to explain the reason for doing so. "For years I have been searching for a program to help me with this task (tried lots) but found nothing that suited my needs so I finally gave up and made my own. I couldn't find a good and efficient program to help me with this task, so I developed this program which turned out really helpful and fast. I have been developing this app for over a year now and it turned out way over my expectations so I decided to share it."

Just like when evil uprises the good souls gather to form legions and groups to combat them, frustration in a sense leads us to get to the ground, soil our hands and get our feet wet, and come up with a solution to address, counter, improve, or uplift the situation. So did I, having felt frustrated after searching and finding that no individual or any organization could show me how to worship the Siddhas as ordained in the Nadi reading in 2002 where Agathiyar asks me to do so, I began gathering whatever little I was shown, had read, and had listened to and came up with my own formula of worship. I need to thank Nadi Nool Aasan Senthilkumar for leading me on a brief recitation of the names of the Siddhas that formed a part of the ritual "Naadikku Dhanam" that Agathiyar had instructed me to do. Senthilkumar passed me the book containing the names of the Siddhas too. Hungry for more, I knocked on the door of the local affiliate of Thavathiru Rengaraja Desigar's "Sri Agathiar Sanmaarga Sangam, Ongarakudil" based in Dengkil. Here I laid my hands on several materials that help enlighten me further. Moving on I knocked on the doors of the  "Sri Agathiar Sanmarkam Gurukulam Malaysia" in Batu Caves. If the former were focused on doing charity and feeding the latter had shifted to "Jothi Vazhipaadu" taking on Ramalinga Adigal's teachings. As I am one to follow strictly what is told, and as Agathiyar had instructed specifically that I worship the Siddhas besides the other main deities in the spectrum, I could not align with both groups and began a personal journey of worship of the Siddhas at my home. I compiled all the songs in praise of the Siddhas that had their source in the numerous Siddha texts and songs that were scattered in numerous books and online and many tiny booklets released by various organizations in the name of Agathiyar. I had to sieve through the massive literature to reach those that I figured were appropriate for my home puja. Thus "The Siddhargal Potri Thoguppu" came to be published and shared online in 2007. 

But as it was entirely in Tamil, and as there was a need to cater to those not proficient in reading the language, I added on a transliteration in English. This came to be published in 2013 as "Agathiyar Pusai" which was revised and updated and renamed in 2016 as the "Complete Book of Prayers to Siddhas".

Later observing that many did not have the time to sit through these long sessions of recitations, I published yet another book online "24 Minutes Siddha Puja" for those on the go.

Recently I published a mini version of the lengthy compilation "The New Book of Praise to the Siddhas" as I began to reinstate the ritual of performing a daily homam in my home for the benefit of all of the divine's creation as Agathiyar had purposed it.

I was truly delighted that many used these books at their home and temple puja sessions besides using them in our group prayers at AVM. Now as I spent time with my grandchildren I see a need to publish a simple version for these children to follow. I pray that Agathiyar shall guide us on this task.

MATAJI IN TOWN

Mataji Sarojini Ammaiyar of Kallar Ashram is in town. She arrived on 1st June and shall stay tentatively till 25th June. She has several programs lined up for her by her sponsors and devotees of Agathiyar including the reading of the Jeeva Nadi in her possession.

LIFE (MIS)UNDERSTOOD

Life is still a mystery even after treading the path of the Siddhas for close to 20 years. Just days ago I thought there was nothing called fate or destiny. We make choices in our lives and pay the price of our actions. It was so clear then. I started to believe there is no fate nor destiny waiting to happen. Instead life is akin to a plain white paper waiting to be written on. Every move is decided in real-time based on the pros and cons of the situation. I was contemplating writing regarding it having drafted a piece on it as follows.

While waiting at the hospital for my daughter's checkup I saw a lady walk up to a young man sitting in the same row as we did. She approached and pointed out to him his wallet on the floor that I presumed had slipped out from his shorts pocket as he sat down. He picked it up and without even a word of thanks nor a look or glance or a nod of thanks to her. Instead, he turned to his partner and gave a sheepish grin. This had me put on my thinking cap. Here was one scenario. All was fine for him since someone discovered that he had dropped his wallet and was good enough to bring it to his attention. What if no one realized nor alerted him? What if someone else had lifted the wallet off the floor and kept it to himself. He would have only realized later when he is called up to make a payment and would have gone into a panic mood. Imagine. So life is full of possibilities in each moment. This has been depicted in many movies like "Sliding Doors", and its Tamil remake "12B" and "Maanaadu" where the lead character tries to prevent certain events from happening. Similarly, we too have choices. Whether we make a wise choice after pondering for days on end or decide a choice spontaneously, the results of our decision-making shall set another chain of events corresponding to our choices. 

So is there really something like fate and destiny waiting to happen? I have begun to doubt that now? Rather I tend to believe that fate and destiny take shape accordingly to our choices. 

But there are other times when we are pushed to a corner according to the circumstances that arise due to our interactions with family, community,  society, the nation, and the world. Here we are left choiceless but to submit to the will of the circumstances. Is this then what is meant by fate and destiny? 

As the above draft lay unpublished, I was given a knock on my head waking me up from my deep slumber. I was given a blow in my face and to be more specific "in my eye". As I was playing with my grandchildren, a book comes flying to my face and hits my right eye. My vision in that eye became blurred instantaneously. As it was 5pm last Saturday, I called up the "Eye Surgeons" where I had my lens in both my eyes replaced a year back after I was diagnosed as having cataracts. The nurse told me that they were closing for the day but as it was an emergency, they were willing to stay open till I arrived. I hit the road with my daughter behind the wheels. But "Waze," told us that it would take us an hour to reach. I called them up and they put me to the doctor. The kind Dr. Asokumaran told me that he would send his nurses back but would wait on me. Upon arrival, he checked my eye and assured me that luckily the "flying book" missed the pupil and iris. My scelera though was bruised. He gave me an ointment and hydration drops to apply and assured me the patch of bruised tissue will heal in a couple of days. Returning home with much gratefulness to the divine and the doctor, I asked a devotee through whom Agathiyar speaks to sit in meditation and see if Agathiyar had something to say. I feared I had erred somewhere and hence was punished. Agathiyar showed the extent of the injury to him in meditation and asked that I see Dr. Asokumaran which I already did. He assured us that all shall be fine. He did not speak about the reason or cause for the incident to take place though. True to the doctor's diagnosis and Agathiyar's words of comfort, my vision is back to normal. In fact, I believe I see better now. Was there then some good waiting to happen behind the whole episode?

Dr. Asokumaran had attended to my daughter's eye previously and referred us to his colleagues at the Selayang Hospital who specialize in Retina Detachment. Read about it at https://agathiyarvanam.blogspot.com/2021/04/amazing-stories.html. My daughter carried her story on video too at https://youtu.be/P3vlCux0Rug

So it made me put on my thinking cap again. If we made the choices in life, how would we explain this and the following real-life instances?

A student gets a blow in his face from his bully schoolmates that injure his eye. He then meets with a road accident while driven to the hospital by his father. He passes away shortly. 

How do you explain a road user who escapes injury in a road accident at a traffic signal, but passes away in another accident at the next road intersection just moments later? 

How do you explain a man driving along when a motorbike from the opposite lane flies into his path? We understand that the rider had applied emergency brakes as a pedestrian crossed before him in the dark. He had let go of his bike before hitting the tarmac. 

How do you explain when a 4 wheel drive hits a car that has stalled on the fast lane and collides into a couple of cars on the other lanes before hitting a lady biker who kept to the very edge of the highway?

How do you explain an old man who was so careful that he used to walk on the grass or pavement beyond the road and its shoulders, away from traffic, is hit by a lorry that goes off the road?

How do you explain injuries sustained when an idle dump truck at a construction site atop a hill rolls down and crashes into waiting cars, parents, and schoolchildren before a school?

How do you explain when a grass cutter who goes about cutting the grass across the road causes a stone to fly and hit a mechanic attending to a car in his workshop smack in his face?

I guess what Tavayogi told us through a devotee makes sense now. He said that life is not a maths equation to be solved but lived and lived well too. The mystery of life is not a problem to be solved but a reality to experience. Life is a process that cannot be understood by coming together in Satsang, or discussing or deliberating on stage. We need to give way for life to flow in its own accord and time. The process has to take place with or without our participation. It might hasten things if we chose to join it and flow with it rather than work to stall or correct it which might place further obstacles on the way. Even my hold on this opinion shall change with the progress of time and the expansion of space. Let us keep an open mind and accept everything that comes our way.

For instance, take the Agathiyar murthy at AVM for instance. Who knows the destiny of this statue? Will my children carry on the legacy of taking care of him after my demise or shall he change hands and end up in another individual's home or perhaps move into a public place like a peedham or temple as he had originally wanted. Agathiyar initially wanted to move to the Jegathguru Sri Raghavendra Swamigal Mrithiga Brindavanam in Ipoh. He also wanted to stay at my home during transit while awaiting the completion of the newly built Brindavanam. Upon arrival in Malaysia on 2nd January 2010, he made several visits to the homes of devotees who invited him over. There was no mention of him moving into the Brindavan then. We soon found out that he changed his mind along the way and decided to stay put in my home and have another devotee place another murthy of his there. When Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal and Mataji Sarojini Ammaiyar came visiting us we brought them and Agathiyar's murthy to the homes of devotees who invited them over. Then for reasons only he knew he dictated that his murthy was not to be moved henceforth. Recently after a lapse of 2 1/2 years, he has asked to be taken to the homes of devotees who invite him over. What's his play? Who can understand the workings of the divine? 

LEANING TOWARDS THE YOUNG

It is time we trained the young rather than gather the oldies around. I guess Agathiyar making his rounds this time around after a lockdown just as the world faced numerous lockdowns the past 2 1/2 years, is to get the young to perform his puja rather than alienate them and have elders run the show. I had my grandchildren perform a small homam, libation to Agathiyar's statue, and sing his praises today. As a toddler and kid, the elder had assisted in the puja rituals in the past too. Now the younger joins her in these moments of fun, play and devotion.

SOULS WHO CAME BY IN MY LIFE - 10

It was on a hot late Saturday afternoon in 2001 that my nephew dropped in on me in my home with a message from his gurus. I was hibernating then, staying away from all forms of worship taking what Lord Shiva had told me in a dream in 1988 to the extreme and ending all my readings, home puja, and temple worship. Lord Shiva seeing my torment at not getting answers to the sufferings others went through was merciful and compassionate enough to ask me to drop and shed everything I did then. That is when after 13 years my nephew Thayalan drops by giving me a message and a Vasudeva mantra that sets me back on track after the long absence. Later he passes me a painting of Lord Dhakshanamurty to worship telling me that I shall meet my guru soon. The following year Agathiyar comes as my guru in the Nadi reading and sends me off on a pilgrimage of Indian temples and finally to meet my very first guru in physical form, Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai on my last leg of the pilgrimage. Only did he reveal the source of the initiation a couple of years later. It was from Agathiyar. He used his network of gurus, Annamalai Swami and Gopal Pillai to convey the message in a trance through a devotee of theirs. As I believe the medium is not important but the message is I took on what was told to me and it set the path ablaze and removed all obstacles and simplified my journey. He gifted me a photo of Agathiyar at Agasthiyampalli after whom Agathiyar had asked me to commission his statue when he visited the temple. He and his family and friends were on hand to receive Agathiyar later in 2010 as Agathiyar entered my home as a bronze statue and invited him over to his home too.

SOULS WHO CAME BY IN MY LIFE - 9

No puja is complete without a session of bhajan or songs in praise of the Lord. Jegan has always lifted our moods and elevated us to a state of ecstasy many a time with his singing during our prayers. Often his buddy Hari would accompany him with the beat. Jegan has lent his voice to our in-house production with Raagawave Production - "Agathiyar Geetham".

SOULS WHO CAME BY IN MY LIFE - 8

I am grateful for the calling that came through the Nadi reading, my first in 2002. It set the ball rolling getting me to seek to know more about Agathiyar and the Siddhas. Taking his word as the Gospel, I made my first pilgrimage to India the following year in 2003. As promised in the Nadi I met Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai. Three years on I met Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar Ashram during his visit to Malaysia. As promised he groomed me on the ways and teachings of the Siddhas. I am indebted for life to these two wonderful souls who showed me the many forms of the divinity that is in and around us, with names, images, tags, and labels attached and given by us. After their demise, the whole pantheon of Gods together with the Siddhas came to reveal further and take our hands. What more can one ask for?

SOULS WHO CAME BY IN MY LIFE - 7

Next in line is my family. I should have placed them at the beginning for they had been with me from the very start helping me with the preparations, during, and after the rituals conducted for the Siddha puja done in our home. Agathiyar tells us that we had all been together in a past birth too. He tells me further the reason I came to the Siddha path was because of them. Then came along many strangers seeking Agathiyar and sent by him to my home. They soon became family too. My family has grown in numbers since then.

Of course, I can never ever repay my parents for bringing me into this world.

SOULS WHO CAME BY IN MY LIFE - 6

Next in line in this series of "Souls Who Came By In My Life" is Surendran. Though he is mentioned 6th in line, he was one of the very first devotees of Agathiyar who came by my home as early as 2010 and has since then remained an ardent devotee of Agathiyar. He was chosen by Agathiyar I guess to bring in the news, latest developments, interviews, visuals, and audios that I have used extensively in my YouTube videos. He would get messages from Agathiyar regarding AVM and its direction through his numerous Nadi readings and convey them to us.

SOULS WHO CAME BY IN MY LIFE - 5

Life is akin to going on a tour. We stop at places meet with others and take leave. We do some sightseeing and some purchasing and off we go on to our next destination. Meanwhile there are several others with whom we travel in the same compartment or vehicle. These are the family and friends who spend more time with us. And so many souls came by on my life's journey too. Most came to make my life pleasurable and memorable. Some came as a thorn that hurt. But we choose to recall the good memories and regard the bad experiences as things to avoid in the future.

Along this journey Mahindren came along in 2013 together with several other youths introduced to me by Bala Chandran. I would rather choose to see him as sent by Agathiyar himself to anoint and decorate his bronze statue at my home. He volunteered and took up the tasks of bathing and dressing up Agathiyar's statue to his hearts content and the satisfaction of Agathiyar himself. Today he carries on the rituals in the confines of his home with his family and occasionally drops by at my home and performs the rituals before Agathiyar at AVM.

SOULS WHO CAME BY IN MY LIFE - 4

He came to witness our regular Pornami Puja or rituals conducted on full moon days after having a Nadi reading. He was a stranger to me then or so we thought. Agathiyar in his subsequent Nadi readings told us that we were together too in earlier births. He called my phone and called on me after his first Nadi reading on the advice of Agathiyar in the Nadi and Nadi Nool Aasan T.Ramesh. He began to participate in all our home prayers. Soon he spread the news about his Nadi reading and his visits to my home to his former schoolmates. They had come together to perform charity under the banner Thondu Seivom much earlier. With their arrival too, my home needed a name to identify and locate. Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) was born. Soon Amudha Surabhi (AS) emerged as a charity arm of AVM. These youngsters were the driving force behind AVM and AS. All credits go to Balachandran, the one who started the ball rolling. He was the commander-in-chief of the team just had he had been on the battlefield in one of his previous births. He contributed many digital artworks for our use on Siddha Heartbeat.

Today he is the proud father of a set of twin daughters and a son, Agatheesan, named after Agathiyar.

SOULS WHO CAME BY IN MY LIFE - 2

The one who mooted me to live stream the pujas initially on Ustream.tv and later Live -YouTube, which otherwise was conducted within the four walls of my home, was Molly Menon who later became to be known to others as Jnana Jothiamma a name given by Agathiyar.

She had emailed me after reading my now-defunct website indianheartbeat. 

Greetings to you Sir, I am Mrs Menon. I was reading an article from Agasthiar.com......when one link led to another and then to another another and finally saw this link........My travels with Supramania SWAMY. The attachment shows the site .....under the caption "from my travels in India"...form where I was able to get the complete picture of your travel and experiences with the Tavayogi and Subramaniya swamy. 

From My Travels In India

Life's Mission Photo Gallery of My Gurus Supramania Swami Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal Agathiyar Gnana Peedham 1 Agathiyar Gnana Peedham 2 From My Travels In India Photos From My Travels in India In The Midst of Sidhas Meeting My Gurus Mysterious India Asanas & Breathing Techniques 1 Asanas & Breathing Techniques 2 Asanas & Breathing Techniques 3 Asanas & Breathing Techniques 4 Songs Parade Digital Gallery The Old Site News Reports News Update About Indian Heartbeat Latest Happenings Memories

FROM MY TRAVELS IN INDIA.

PRAYERS WITH SUPRAMANIA SWAMI

Later that night at 7.30 pm, Supramania Swami lead me on prayer in his kudil. The Swami started chanting his guru Yogi Ramsuratkumar's (Visiri Swami)name. The chant went YOGI RAMSURATKUMARA, YOGI RAMSURATKUMARA,YOGI RAMSURATKUMARA JAYA GURURAYA.

After about a few minutes into the chant, I heard another voice - that of a male chanting together. I could hear Swami’s voice. I could hear mine too. So who was this third-person chanting with us? There was no one else then in the kudil. Swami's wife and son had gone out. I did not open my eyes. Eventually, after about twenty minutes, Swami ended the chant and the voice was not heard again. I had wanted to ask him about this third voice but completely forgot. 

SUPRAMANIA SWAMI’S LIFE IN BRIEF

............

This interested me a lot....a I had for a very long time trying to find out visit Saint Agasthiar's cave. I read all the articles posted on Sadhguru Venkataraman's site. What is this person who is mentioned as Tavayogi. Is he a guide or an Enlightened Master. Then I saw this link which shows...."email me ". Hence I thought I would email and find out the details of all that is mentioned here. I would also like to know who shanmugam.avadaiyappa is /regards. mrs menon. 

I live in the United States and am planning a trip to India around July. God willing......I will try and visit Tavayogi's ashram in Kallar, Kovai. If you are on skype or yahoo. we can chat & you can tell me the details ...before I go. 

Hence began a wonderful relationship between her and my family. She left for Kallar ashram in 2011 and was blessed to begin her journey on the Siddha path by Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal, Mataji Sarojini Ammaiyar, and Agathiyar. Returning to the USA she prompted me to air live the puja I did at home. She would watch the puja from her room at her aunt's place. 

She also introduced me to Skype where she would speak to me for hours on end about Agathiyar. Agathiyar would take the opportunity to interrupt our conversation and speak to her on Skype. Wanting to see Agathiyar in my home, she followed us landing in Malaysia within hours after me and my family arrived home from visiting her and Kallar ashram in 2013. She spent just four days with Agathiyar and left to return the following year. 

Moving back to her birthplace of Kerala and Chennai where she studied, she went on an extensive pilgrimage of discovery. Agathiyar arranged for her to be brought places. She spread the essence of Agathiyar's teachings brushing it on to all those who came within some distance. If initially, she went in search of the Siddhas after confining her to her room in an apartment in Chennai, she was visited by the Siddhas later. She has since passed away.