NOW OR NEVER

My head is drenched in I don't know what these days. A current that sweeps occasionally through my body is felt more at regular intervals these days too. It is blissful sitting and trying to meditate. I cannot seem to bring myself out of it. I just want to sit and continue. I saw a silver spot as I sat with my eyes closed this morning for a brief moment and I am not sure what it is. 

Agathiyar in revealing my past so that I could correct the present and chart my own future, has given me an opportunity to break the cycle of Karma and birth. Then he offered to show me the way to enlightenment just as they stood enlightened by having me begin worshiping the Siddhas and the deities in my home. The bridge was drawn between both worlds. Since then we have had visitations from them. Then he gave me the tools to refine this gross body into the finer subtle body that they had transformed into.

It was not enough that we gathered once a week on Thursdays and other auspicious days to worship the Siddhas; it was not enough to go on pilgrimages and visit their abodes; it was not enough to do charity; it was not enough to go for regular Nadi readings nor bring others to read theirs; it was not enough sitting in on Satsangs or holding and hosting Satsangs. We had to take hold of our breath. We had to practice yoga to center our minds and journey within traveling through these chakras. We have to attain the state the Siddhas are in as this is their wish for us. Hence we saw Agathiyar come over the past week and grill the devotees who took a lackadaisical attitude and never practiced the Asanas and Pranayama techniques and practices given some 5 years back. It was pretty obvious that he was not giving up on them as he had me put him through on video call to all those who gave excuses to stay away that day. When the message could not get through to them he had me record it and forward it to them. He wants to see each one of them once a month to assess their progress. Agathiyar means business. The honeymoon years are over. It seems like it is now or never. 

THE TRANSFORMATIVE YEARS

Looking back on this marvelous journey walking with the Siddhas, we see how they revealed our past so that we could correct the present and chart our own future, provided we wanted to, allowing us to break the cycle of Karma and birth.

Then they offered to show us the way to enlightenment just as they stood enlightened provided we wanted to, by having us begin worship in our homes to the Siddhas and the deities. The bridge was drawn between both worlds. 

Then they gave us the tools to refine this gross body into the finer subtle body that they had transformed into, provided we wanted to.

Having worked on us all these years, Agathiyar asked that I pave the way for him to come over to our shores and grace the Sri Raghavendra Mritiga Brindavanam where he wants to bless his children. I set upon carrying out his wish and desire. While waiting for the start and completion of the said temple complex he wished to stay in my home in transit. 

Agathiyar spoke about his awaited arrival at my home. 

WATCHING THE BREATH

When Tavayogi told me to speak about the Siddhas at an opening of an affiliate of his in Banting many years back, I shuddered as I was new to the path and only knew Tavayogi that too very minimal. Today though Tavayogi and Agathiyar have educated me yet I stand bare and naked before them. I still get trashed for not being able to answer Agathiyar at times. But seeing the amount of information dispersed on the net at times I feel some take upon themselves as custodians of God, deities, Siddhas, and gurus and promising many things. 

I am in no way a custodian of God, deities, Siddhas, and my gurus. They are available for all. They come before us in many forms and names to suit each devotee and his desires for one God, deity, Siddha or guru cannot possibly fit all the myriad of temperaments and souls. Yes God, deity, Siddha, or guru might seem to be customized to our needs too. Beyond all these forms and names, stands one sole entity that is present in all of us and governs us. To know that is the purpose of life. This is what Agathiyar meant when he asked each of us why we came to the Siddha path. He has the answer too, that it was to know the breath. It was to know that the breath is Sivam. In his memo to us, he said that breath was Uyir that sustains us, the body or Udal and the soul or Atma. Then we are told that the breath was Vaalai. Tavayogi once told me that the breath was Sivam. Bhogar had us chant "Adhi Sivam, Jothi Sivam, Moola Sivam". Agathiyar too days before told us the same, that the breath was Sivam. Name it anything but the core matter was to have us focus on our breath now. When many sit and practice meditation by visualizing, Agathiyar tells us to become aware of the breath and follow it. The breath that we thought we inhaled and exhaled shall one day go about without our asking. To sense it and know its place, one has to journey into it. Merge in it. That moment is Dhyanam. 

நீயாய் சுவாசித்த பிராணவாயு இனி உன்னை கேட்காமல் உன்னுள் ஊடுருவும். எப்பொழுதெல்லாம்  அது ஊடுருவதை நீ உணறுகிறாயோ இருக்கும் இடம் அறிந்து அதனுள் பயணம் செய். கலந்து போ. அதனோடு நீ கலக்கும் தருணமே தியானம்.

Ramalinga Adigal guides us from there. Use the breath to go within. Place the effort. Fan the Jothi within using the breath. Merge in the Jothi. "I shall be with you as long as the Jothi burns. I shall be with those who immerse in the Jothi", he says.

உமது பிரணவத்தை கொண்டு செல்லு. முயற்சி செய். ஜோதி அதனைச் சுடர்விட செய்யுங்கள். ஜோதியோடு கலப்பாய். உன்னுள் ஜோதி எரியும்வரை நான் உன்னோடு வருவேன். ஆழ்ந்து இருப்போருடன் நான் சேர்ந்து இருக்கிறேன்.

It is akin to taking a ride back home hitching on the breath that giveth us life. Tavayogi wrote in his "Andamum Pindamum" that in the beginning, there was a light that enveloped all. That was Jothi. That was Sivan. From the passive Sivan came forth the dynamic Sivam. Sivam breathed life or Uyir into all his creation. 

To get to know this Jothi we have to go through a process and transformation both in the external and the internal. One has to be prepared to bear the pain as Ramalinga Adigal reveals only God knows what he went through. Agathiyar says Jnana Jothiamma who was an embodiment of Gnana, was being prepared to receive the Darshan of the Jothi. But as she could not take the cleansing that Agathiyar had her go through she asked to be taken. 

ஞானத்திற்கு ஜோதியாய் இருந்தவளை ஜோதியின் தரிசனம் காண்பித்தற்கு ஆயத்தம் செய்த நிலையில் நான் செய்த சுத்திகரிப்பு அவளின் உள்ளம் ஏற்கவில்லை எம்மோடு இணைந்து கொள்ள அவள் விருப்பம் கொண்டால்

We understand now why Agathiyar told my daughter that it was not easy.

Tavayogi in referring to Agathiyar's "Sowmiya Saagaram" states our purpose here is to understand the origin and end of Param or Para Sorupam or Siva or Siva Rupaa Rupam or Vettavezhi, the void that shines as Jothi. One who has realized the secrets of the Vettavezhi Prapancham, the Prapanjam within the void, will transform their physical and gross form into a subtle form, and settle in the Jothi or Sivan that is the source and cause of the subtle.

வெட்டவெளி பிரபஞ்ச ரகசியம் உணர்ந்தவர்கள் தன்னுடைய தூல உடலைச் சூட்சுமமாகி அந்தச் சூட்சும உடலுக்கு ஆதாரமாக மற்றும் காரணமாக இருக்கின்ற முதலும் முடிவுமாக இருக்கின்ற ஜோதியில் ஜோதியாக இருப்பார்கள்.

Though names and tags we give might confuse us, the reality is that there is only the breath that is real. Lose it and everything else collapses. Our whole world collapses. Our outlook and perspective of the world collapses. Relationships collapse. Nothing remains. It is sheer void. Only existence. Everything hangs on a tiny tread that is the breath. No wonder Agathiyar has asked us to take notice of it and follow it. It shall take us home. 

Konganar who had seen 18 wars waged on the battlefield of Kurukshetra, reveals the count and number of wives the Siddhas took. Tavayogi told me to bring my wife and family into the path when I told him the day I met him that Agathiyar had wanted me to come to the path of the Siddhas in my Nadi reading. Agathiyar in coming to us during his Vizha on Thursday and again yesterday, spoke about the importance of husband and wife relationships and wanted everyone to compromise and live a good life. Agathiyar told a devotee who was ready to settle down in a married life to get to know whoever comes along, irrespective if he worships the Siddhas or not and irrespective if he is a vegetarian, after matching their horoscopes. He told her that it is of utmost importance that both should like each other initially and eventually come to love each other. This is the importance that the Siddhas give to family life. 

In gathering us and having us practice the Asanas and Pranayama that Tavayogi taught us before him, he did not exclude women and children. He had the womenfolk and a 10-year-old show him what they had learned thus far. 

In the book on Kavyakantha Vasistha Ganapati Muni entitled NAYANA, A BIOGRAPHY OF KAVYAKANTHA VASISTHA GANAPATI MUNI (from the original Telugu texts by Gunturu Lakshmikantam), Dr G Krishna says "Ganapati Muni had described his wife as a Tapa Sakhi, meaning comrade in Tapas just as Arundhati was the Tapa Sakhi of Vasistha. Visalakshi, wife of Ganapati Muni took to the worship of Agni whenever Ganapati Muni was out of station. Ganapati Muni advised that women should not be barred from any spiritual or religious chores when it was prevalent at that time that women were not considered fit to worship Agni, study the Vedas, and recite Vedic Mantra and were denied the benefits of Upayana. Ganapati Muni himself used to initiate women into Mantra Japa. Many were the women who were initiated into Gayathri Vidhya, which was considered exclusive to men."

"The study of scriptures had convinced Ganapati that the ancient rishis had practiced austerity and attained self-realization without giving up family life and responsibilities. Women were not treated as objects of pleasure by our ancient Rishis. They were as qualified as men to discharge spiritual responsibilities. The ancient Rishis by their exemplary behavior became spiritual preceptors to their wives and helped to establish a well-ordered society. They never considered their wives as hindrances to Tapas.” True enough when my wife questioned Agathiyar back then if she was in my way a hindrance to me seeking the liberation of the soul, Agathiyar replied that no one was a hindrance to the other. 

M. Govindan in BABAJI AND THE 18 SIDDHA KRIYAYOGA TRADITION, Kriya Yoga Publications, Quebec, Canada, 1991, (M.Govindan, 1991)says,

“The Siddhas never called for seclusion of oneself. On the contrary, Siddhas have asked us not to neglect our families and responsibilities but to attend to both worlds, the material and spiritual. They challenge us not to turn our backs on the world in our quests for spiritual enlightenment.”

THE CHANGING OF GUARD

When Agathiyar asked me to come to the worship of the Siddhas in my first Nadi reading in 2002 I went looking for someone or a movement that did it but found none. While one was engrossed and fully committed to doing charity another had moved on to the worship of Arutperunjothi which was even more alien to me then. Armed with Agathiyar's painting and a booklet of a compilation of the names of Siddhas that I was given at the end of my Nadi reading, I began on my own. Besides reciting these names I sang the many other songs of praises to the Siddhas that I had compiled along the way. Agathiyar sent me Tavayogi who brought me to places and temples associated with the Siddhas in 2005. Tavayogi introduced me to doing charity at his Ashram. On one of his subsequent visits in 2007, he showed me and several others Yoga Asanas and Pranayama that I began to practice. Tavayogi who initiated me into lighting the Homam, came personally to fine-tune it in 2010. Agathiyar too came as a bronze statue that he had me commission and made in Swamimalai. Mataji passed me several appropriate songs to accompany each item that was used in the libation or Abhisegam. In having me open the doors to my home to a group of youths from Thondu Seivom in 2013, Agathiyar had me share the worship of the Siddhas and associated rituals that I carried out at home with my family. My home became Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM). The same year I and my family visited Kallar ashram. Agathiyar introduced us to giving alms and doing charity at children's and old folks' homes and later sent Sri Krishna of Pothihai Tharma Chakram (PTC) to bring us to street feeding. In 2016 the AVM family visited Kallar ashram. All went well until Agathiyar foresaw that we would stagnate in rituals and charity which were the first two phases of Sariyai and Kriyai terminated them by bringing the shutters on AVM promptly as the dreaded virus emerged in 2019. He had me go within and watch my breath while he armed the rest with the techniques and practice of Yoga and waited eagerly for each of their homes to turn into AVM too. As if to identify them to me, after the pandemic cleared, Agathiyar made several visits to the homes of his devotees who invited him over. Years went by and except for this handful, nothing moved in the rest of the circle. What moved was the energies within me that began to take hold of me after their awakening as a result of the Asanas and Pranayama practices I had diligently carried out beginning in 2007. The Muladhara was awakened a year later in 2008 and made its way without my knowledge until it took stock of my life crippling me from carrying out even the basic daily routines between 2010 and 2012. I had to live with it not knowing when it would surface again as it did in 2016 and later in 2018 though it was blissful and painful at the same time. The years beginning in 2019 when the virus took the upper hand and froze all our movements and freedom, I spent my time in solitude and in continuing to write this blog. In 2022 Agathiyar felt it was time I was given a hand and released the energies that had ponded in Manipuraka. It brought great relief and bliss. This bliss is felt even as I pen these worlds as Ramalinga Adigal's Agaval plays in the background and the breeze caresses me coming in through the open window where I am sitting at my desk. My home took on rightfully the name Gnana Kottam as given by Agathiyar back then where the Gods, Agathiyar, and the other Siddhas began to address devotees both in person and virtually. 

Just as Agathiyar had me open my home to others to participate and partake in the nectar of bliss that came on with worship, this time around he had me gather the kids that have come into the AVM family and enjoy these moments in the company of these children. AVM Kids took shape.  If Goddess Vaalai is depicted as a child, she is also the breath that traverses through us. As such Agathiyar has forcefully come down on the devotees who had been honeymooning and postponing the agenda of reaching the Siddha state to carry out the Yoga practices given in 2019. Though it was delayed, my home now has truly taken on the name Agathiyar Tapovanam Malaysia (ATM) that Lord Muruga had conferred in a Nadi reading in 2018. I guess just as Ramalinga Adigal came too soon and too early for his time, Gnana Kottam and ATM were established when devotees were not ready to listen and practice. 

If in these mere 22 years of traveling and following the Siddha path I have seen many seekers, aspirants, and sadhakas, imagine how many Agathiyar must have seen and seen again and again as we came, again and again, standing before him in each birth? He must lament, "Oh! not you again? I had taught you all there was to it. You never listened and followed nor practiced and achieved." Imagine if he were to say, "Now what are you standing before me for? What I will give you now will go down the drain too. Leave. There is no salvation for you!" Where would we turn to? He is our only solution, way, and path. He is the way and the path. Walking with him, carrying out the worship, rituals, and practice, and sitting with him is living the Siddha path. When many seek him outside, in form, name, and figure, he is also the rocks, plants, animals, and fellow humans. He is very much living in us as our breath, the warmth, the water content, the salts, and minerals, and the electricity, in the body. 

In school, we are left alone and unsupervised but when the critical years arrive where they determine our course of life, we burn the midnight oil. Similarly, Agathiyar left us alone to immerse in the pleasures of life only to wake us up from our dream and rush us to leave the danger zone and reach out to safety. The safety net is now Yoga. If Sariyai rids us of our past baggage of Karma and balances the merits of good and bad deeds, Kriyai draws the bridge down for the divine to come to visit us, and love and compassion to blossom and bloom within, Yoga will have the divine effulgence come to stay within us and prolong extent and keep us alive for as long as we choose. 

If in Sariyai we were dependant on our parents, in Kriyai on our gurus, in coming to Yogam we take charge of both our body and life that resides within. Eventually, Yogam will bring us to know our Soul or Atma. Knowing the Atma is Gnanam where if in Yogam the ambrosia oozes, in Gnanam spiritual and divine knowledge dawns.

Hence the emphasis has shifted to Yogam now at Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM). We can justify taking on the name Agathiyar Tapovanam Malaysia (ATM) now. Vaalai shall bring us to merge in Sivam. This is where he is bringing us to. 

LIFE LESSONS

Agathiyar is taking drastic moves to bring a paradigm shift and move his devotees who had become complacent in just worshipping the Siddhas as it was earlier with temple worship. His ideal is to make each one a Siddha too. By bringing the shutters down at AVM in 2019, he brought an end to the regular congregation. He stopped all forms of worship, only to be taken up henceforth for any particular cause or as the need arises. Ending charity too, as my wife said it had begun to make us "high", and sending everyone off, armed with Asana and Pranayama practice, he made me go within. He is doing the same too, now with others and PTS. The bronze statue of Agathiyar that was at AVM and later moved to PTS shall leave for another home once the new hosts are ready. Relieving the adults of their duties, the children at PTS will carry out the rituals while awaiting the next move. Generally, there won't be puja and charity that is Sariyai and Kriyai but only Yogam and Gnanam dispensed as Agathiyar has come personally to monitor, supervise, and run the Yoga sessions and is dispensing Gnanam. 

When my daughter found a life partner, I approached the temple priest to find out the good times to carry out the many ceremonies that come with it. His words appeared as Agathiyar's words to me. He too looked like Agathiyar. When I told him that I was not there to match their horoscopes as they had loved each other, he told me that that was the most important criterion, Mana Porutham. He then told me that fate had brought them together. We have seen how Karma dictates the choice of a life partner in an earlier post. Finally, he told me to leave it to the divine. Yesterday he advised the relative of a girl seeking to marry. Agathiyar told them not to search for a life partner according to their terms and conditions as their search was limited to only those who professed to be in the path of Siddha Margam and limited to only those who were strict vegetarians like them. He asked them how the path to flourish and expand its reach if they married someone on the same path. He asked to look into their horoscopes. He told them as the priests told me it was important that he loved her. Hence he asked that she get to know him first. 

Seeking Agathiyar's blessings in approving their wants on the need to purchase properties, he asked them to think hard if they could truly afford to pay for it. He reminded us that it was not fair to leave our debts to be settled by our children. Instead, he told them to seek their grace rather than their blessings. We always stand before them carrying our desires seeking their blessings for fulfilment of our desires and an obstacle-free ride. Of course, the ever-compassionate and loving Siddhas would bless us. But it is still our wants and needs. So if trouble brews it is only of our own making. With each monstrous desire comes a hefty cost that has to be paid whereas with grace, all our needs are provided at minimum cost or at no cost. I never sought to look for a home or a vehicle but they fell into my lap. It was a small home and a small car that I could afford with my pay, back then. Agathiyar sends someone over to do the repairs to the aged home too at a reasonable cost. So is it with my old car. He comes personally to look into this aged body of mine too whenever trouble brews. As my debts are all settled I can focus on what I came to do now - his work. I guess he has given me a new task now. If my home was host to the Pornami puja where he sent many to watch and participate beginning in 2013, now he wants me to host the Yoga sessions while he sends Sadhakas over. I shall abide by his wishes. This is all due to his unfaltering grace. 

A DAY OF ASCENDING THE STAGE

Agathiyar told us sometime back that in the absence of Tavayogi in the physical form, he would come to guide us. He did just that today. By midday, he had seen several of his devotees perform the Asanas and Pranayama practice that Tavayogi had taught us in 2008. He sat through the whole session observing, fine-tuning, and correcting them. He also imparted knowledge telling us that the preliminary benefit of these techniques was that it would widen the blood vessels, hence increasing the blood flow to the head and other parts of the body, cleansing and purifying it.  

He also spoke about the difference between blessings and grace. In the former, the Siddhas shall bless the wants and needs of the devotees irrespective if it was what the Siddhas wanted. But in the latter, when grace is bestowed on us, Prapanjam itself shall shower its riches. So choose wisely he told us. 

Several more devotees are supposed to turn up and place before him what they have learned and practiced. We shall await their participation too. 

Later in the evening several more devotees came around and did the practice as directed by Agathiyar. I guess he should be pleased. 

THE GURU COMES TO SAVE US

Today is a day that deems whether we would continue to be in the shadows and protection of the Siddhas, who are only too eager to take us on a journey within, or continue to succumb to the pull, tug, and lure of the external world. It was a decision left to us. Those who sought to stay around and have him mold them will turn up today to practice Asanas and Pranayama before him. As our parents let us roam the neighborhood, only to call us out as dusk approaches, so too Agathiyar came to claim his students last Thursday. This reminds us of the stories of the gurus' ever-watchful eyes watching over their disciples. We are blessed for we are the cow that jumped into the pond to save ourselves from the ferocious tiger. Balachander Aiya shared with me this story in August 2018.

Once upon a time, a cow went out to graze in the jungle. Suddenly, she noticed a tiger racing towards her. She turned and fled, fearing that at any moment the tiger would sink his claws into her. The cow desperately looked for someplace to escape and at last, saw a shallow pond. Barely evading the tiger’s reach, she jumped into the pond, and in the heat of the chase, the tiger blindly leaped after her. To the surprise of them both, the pond was extremely shallow yet filled with deep recesses of mud. After toppling over each other, the cow and the tiger found themselves a short distance apart, stuck in the mud up to their necks. Both had their heads above water but were unable to free themselves no matter how much they writhed. The tiger repeatedly snarled at the cow and roared, “I am going to enjoy the sound of crunching your bones between my teeth!” He thrashed about in a fury but soon became fretful as he found no prospect of escape. The cow thoughtfully laughed as the tiger struggled to free himself and asked him, "Do you have a master?”

The tiger disdainfully replied, “I am the king of the jungle. Why do you ask me if I have a master? I am the master!”

The cow said, "You may be the king of the jungle, but here all your power has failed to save your life.”

“And what about you?”, retorted the tiger. “You are going to die here in this mud too!”

The cow smiled mildly and said, “No, I am not.”

“If even I, the king of the jungle cannot free myself from this mud”, snapped the tiger, “Then how can you, an ordinary cow?”

The cow gently replied, “I cannot free myself from this mud, but my master can. When the sun sets and he finds me absent at home, he will come looking for me. Once he finds me, he will raise me up and escort me home to my sweet home.”

The tiger fell silent and coldly glared at the cow. Soon enough, the sun set, and the cow’s master arrived. He immediately recognized the plight she was in and lifted her to safety. As they walked home, the cow and the master both felt renewed gratitude for one another and pitied the tiger they both would have been happy to save if only the tiger had allowed them.

The Purport of the story:  The Cow represents a Surrendered Heart, the Tiger represents an Egoistic Mind, and the Master represents the Guru. The Mud represents the World, and the Chase represents the Struggle for Existence therein.

No matter how many troubles appear to be created by the egoistic minds of the world, who are themselves as stuck as the surrendered heart, ..the surrendered heart has faith that the Guru is always going to come at the right time to save her and take her back “home” - the inner happiness in us is pure and true home. So when totally stuck and helpless, when one has already done all one can and has no more means left, when every other effort fails, the surrendered heart still does not give up hope. She will just wait patiently until sundown.

On Tuesday 30 July 2019, I carried a post, "SAYONARA".

As I have written in my last post Agathiyar has revealed the way and showed us the escape route from the cycle of birth and death. The truth has been revealed. The theory is over. He is asking us to move on to practice what he has preached all these while, now. Or you can take it the other way too, after putting into practice all his tiny bits of advice, he has revealed the theory behind it. For those yet to come on board it is now up to them to place the effort and comply with the 5 facets of life. For the others, I pray that we can all continue with the task. Now he is moving us to another platform from the physical to that of the soul that takes place within. He shall guide further from within each one of us, individually, customized, and just made for each.  So it is time to say Sayonara for this group ATM too. Let us meet up sometime in the future and exchange notes on how we are faring in our spiritual journey. Thank you very much for being with us all this while.

It seemed this blog had bonded our souls forever as many readers were taken aback and wrote in then wanting to know the reason. Unknown to all of us the pandemic was to rear its ugly head in several months. Hence the message came on time.

We have read many stories of seekers coming to gurus and their monasteries to learn how to liberate the soul but instead were told to carry out chores and tasks. These seekers after some time would rebel and confront the master only to be told that doing the tasks at hand had elevated them unknowingly. A Zen Koan is often used to explain this experience.

A Master who lived as a hermit on a mountain was asked by a monk, “What is the Way?”

“What a fine mountain this is,” the master said in reply.

“I am not asking you about the mountain, but about the Way.”

“So long as you cannot go beyond the mountain, my son, you cannot reach the Way,” replied the master.

(Source: https://mindmastery.wordpress.com/2007/02/22/zen-koan-the-way-and-the-mountain/)

Similarly, rather than show us the overpowering mountain that was to be tackled, which at the onset would put us off believing that it was beyond our reach, he led us by the hand bringing us along on his walk, talking to us as we traveled, allowing us to stop to view the surrounding, permitting us to stop to take a rest, continue the walk and keeping us engrossed in the present. Eventually, without us realizing he had brought us to our destination where we stood atop the very mountain enjoying the magnificent view. We did not realize that we had come a long distance and had arrived atop the mountain peak! It is individual moments that come together to make time. We were brought to observe the 5 facets of wholesome living as desired by the divine for every man taking birth. These were not merely tools but a purpose in itself. Just as we were taken aback to realize that we had already reached the summit, the purpose of taking human birth was only made known to us after completing the journey. 

I and many others at AVM had a calling many years back. Agathiyar asked us to come to his path and follow his way. We took up the invitation. He gave us many tasks and chores to do as we traveled with him, never elaborating further or describing the benefits or results that one gains from doing it, until later, after we had put in hours of work and effort. He was not one to hang a carrot in front of the carriage to lure us on. He would direct and leave the option to us, whether we wanted to carry out his dictates. We did as he asked without questioning him. After years of apprenticeship with him finally, he reveals to us that all the tasks he gave us, were indeed the way and was indeed the journey. 

If coming to Agathiyar the seeking stopped, coming to Tavayogi the true journey began. When one comes to the end of his seeking for a path, among the many available out there, only then is his true path revealed. His true journey begins from where he has arrived and stands. Tutorship under a guru, learning compassion, doing charity, conducting puja, reciting the Siddha's names, performing the fire ritual or Homam and Yagam, and performing the bathing ritual or Abhisegam on the idols, all these were components of the first phase of our journey that we were asked to carry out. A massive task was made easy when he broke it up into tiny fragments and assignments. The first phase ended in September of 2019 when he brought the shutters down on AVM and had us go within to explore the soul. Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) saw a transition into Agathiyar Tapovanam Malaysia (ATM), a name given much earlier by Lord Muruga in 2018 in preparing us to embark on phase 2. The sayonara was to bid farewell to the first phase. We moved into the second phase. 

In the second phase of our journey, we began working on the soul and its journey back home. Lord Muruga came to do us justice in opening the heart chakra in us, bidding us to only surrender. Lord Muruga and Agathiyar saw through our souls' yearning to be released and become realized, though the "I" in us saw it not. Lord Muruga repeatedly asked us if we were ready to receive his initiation and if we had surrendered totally. To those who came with a confused state of mind and unsettled problems, he deferred the initiation to another time, saying it would do no good if given now.

Richard Schiffman in his "Sri Ramakrishna – A Prophet for the New Age", Paragon House, 1989, writes about how Ramakrishna handled his disciples. He loved them and was patient with them as they were all young, and forgiving. He saw in them youthful dedication and energy, earnestness, and sincerity, the very qualities that had fueled his own journey to God.

"He wished to nurture and bring to fruition these divine qualities within them. Ramakrishna through the purity of his vision saw through the thin veneer of personality and perceived directly the divine spark yearning for expression deep within these spiritual aspirants. Once he had seen that spark nothing that happened could convince him that it wasn't there. Once he had welcomed someone, he could never let them go, whatever came to pass. The contradictions, the shortcomings, the stumblings along the way, the thousand weaknesses that flesh is heir to, didn't matter. Only God mattered - God struggling fitfully within, yearning to be free of the bonds of the flesh."

"Each soul was an open book for him, and he knew all of its dark secrets and all of its bright possibilities. Ramakrishna did not measure a man by the same yardstick that the world uses. He saw how the best of men are rifled through with hidden failings, and how even the worst have the bright seed of redemption within them. It would not be an exaggeration to say that Ramakrishna had peered behind the curtain of the puppet theatre and observed the mother at work pulling all the strings that man in his ignorance imagines he holds himself. It was a vision that burnt to ashes any temptation to lay blame to judge or to condemn. The very act of seeing all was the act of forgiving all. Even to speak of forgiveness is too harsh; for in a world where God alone acts, what is there to forgive, and who is there to be forgiven?"

S. Parthasarathy wrote in his book, BIOGRAPHY OF YOGI RAMSURATKUMAR - THE GODCHILD OF TIRUVANNAMALAI (AMARAKAVIYAM),

‘In later years Yogi Ramsuratkumar said “Nobody can love this beggar like my Father Swami Ramdas and nobody can torture this beggar like my Father Swami Ramdas. My Father killed this beggar because He loved this beggar. This beggar died at the holy lotus feet of my father Swami Ramdas in the year 1952. After that my Father alone exists and not this beggar. This name Yogi Ramsuratkumar is not this beggar’s name; it is the name of my Father. Father would always shower his grace on the people who remember this name.’

“The King Bee would bring any potential worm to its nest and would sting all the time till it becomes another King Bee. Likewise, a Guru also works on his disciples till the disciples get the state of the Guru. The process is painful but there is no escape.” 

So did he come to remind us not to topple over after we have reached the summit for it would be a wasted effort making the climb. Seeing that his students were still honeymooning, Agathiyar came as the headmaster with a cane to have us buck up and see through the schooling successfully, for the very institution's name and pride lay at stake with those who professed and took up the path of the Siddhas. Deep within it was love that moved him to move us and bring us from the mud and save us from the tiger. 

WORKING ON THE TRANSFORMATION

When Agathiyar, raising his voice, went around asking each one of us why we came to the Siddha Margam or path last Thursday, he was, in fact, schooling us. My wife asked me the same question too today. I shrugged my shoulders and replied I didn't know. She too replied that she did not know. Though some might have had the curiosity to know or circumstances might have brought them before the Siddhas, she was asked to come to the worship of the Siddhas by Tavayogi in 2005 after I took up the call in the Nadi reading in 2002. I did not know what was in store for me and where I was headed for the first two years. However, I took the initiative to learn by visiting movements associated with Agathiyar and from much reading. It was after my second Nadi reading in 2005 that the Siddhas regularly updated me and kept track of me and the practices that they gave in subsequent Nadi readings. Though he had painted a wonderful picture of the future, in the numerous Aasi Nadi readings, I carried on with what was told, never a moment stopping to fantasize about the future. When Agathiyar asked that we commission his bronze statue in Swamimalai and have it brought over to the Sri Raghavendra Mritiga Brindavanam under construction then, we followed as told. But he later changed his mind and stayed put at my home. He then sent Bala Chandran over to witness and participate in our Pornami Puja after his Nadi reading in 2013. Bala in turn brought his schoolmates and colleagues from his group Thondu Seivom. Hence Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) was born. We all followed his directives as told. We never laid sight of what was in store for us ahead or sought to know what was to come. We were dedicated to the cause and task on hand that was given by Agathiyar and nothing more. So it surprised us all when Agathiyar asked the whole lot why we came to his path? 

I realized that he intended to know how much we had learned in coming to the path, as there was not much learning per se since it was becoming rather a mechanical routine and a duty or task that they performed. My wife told me that we were even getting high on doing puja and charity. Considering the above reasons, and fearing it would become another center to congregate,  Agathiyar made the painful move to dissolve the group hoping that they would be moved to make their home an Agathiyar Vanam too. But sadly it did not happen with some, though others carried on the tradition. They thought it was enough to pray and he would take care of them. That is purely Bakthi Marga. He wanted each of us to become a Siddha.  A Siddha has to do rituals and Yoga practice.

If Tavayogi asked us to come out of Bakthi, Agathiyar too, moving us to take up the Vaasi practice seriously, said the same, to the extent of asking us to let go of the hold we have on him. One might then ask just as my wife did, why bring us from temple worship as in Sariyai to Siddha worship and rituals as in Kriyai only to ask us to leave that too. Why did not they show us Yogam in the very first place? My wife asked me why he did not bring us to Yogam in the very first place instead of having us engage in temple worship, home worship, and rituals to the Siddhas only to ask us to drop them now. 

Though our perspective of the world around us is straightforward, innocent, and simple, it is rather complex on the subtle and unseen level for we each carry our baggage of Karma on this journey that has to be laid down first. So the Siddha has us go on pilgrimages and carry out remedies. As they say, no pain no gain, the effort placed relieves the burden to a certain extent. With the coming of the guru, he further unloads our baggage by having us carry out rituals personally. We take Karma into our own hands and work it out through further rituals that we conduct till it loses its potential and becomes inert. As Agathiyar told me as long as there was Karma and curses, one cannot reap the benefits of puja and Yogam, they have us go through Sariyai and Kriyai first. Only then can we take up Yogam and see its benefits. With the influences of the past Karma out of the way, he has us engage in Yogam that brings a total transformation within and without. This is their ideal in having us come this far. 

So when Agathiyar had me teach Mahindren and later instructed Mahindren to teach the rest just before he broke up AVM and the pandemic set in, his intention was to have us continue puja and the practice at home. I guess although some did it, others were not moved to carry them out. They gathered and carried out puja at AVM but were not moved to bring the puja into their homes. They never made the move to turn their individual homes into Agathiyar Vanam too as I had done and opened my doors to others. This was Tavayogi and Agathiyar's wish too. But it did not materialize. Hence the outburst on the part of Agathiyar a couple of days ago. Agathiyar told them that they had wasted some 2 1/2 years. I believe he was mad that besides not practicing they never listened to his advice and never executed his directives too. To those who carried on puja though, they became very much attached to the form and name that Agathiyar wished we would come out of and grow. They had to drop these attachments and move on to Yogam too. So Agathiyar had to come personally and school us into becoming obedient students and disciples, a criterion that is much needed on the Siddha path. 

SIVAM & VAALAI

Agathiyar has debunked the purpose of coming to the Siddha Margam or path or way. It is to know Sivam which is the breath. All other definitions, meanings, and purposes are secondary products derived from the inner transformation, its process, and chemical reactions. The breath is also known as Vaalai, that man, as usual, has given numerous names, eyes, nose, ears, mouth, limbs, and form, and began to worship says Agathiyar. The worship of Vaalai and Sivam is in truth worshipping our own breath. Hence we come to worship ourselves. We end temple worship, home worship, worshipping the gurus, worshipping the Siddhas, worshiping Vaalai and Prapanjam in the external world but instead take her hand and move within the body as the entire cosmos is within it too, says Tavayogi "Andathil Ullathu, Pindathil Ullathu".

Phew! What a wonderful and enlightening journey it has been for us. Agathiyar has revealed all things, clarified the grey areas, and corrected the wrong perspective. 

Agathiyar is saddened when he sees quarrels in families and broken families. He wants us to mend all ties and live a beautiful life besides setting the target and not deviating from reaching Sivam eventually. Indeed, our normal respiratory rate of 12 to 18 breaths per minute, and pulse rate of 60 to 100 beats per minute changes when we react to external conditions be it as at peace with ourselves and nature, agitated and angry, or in anxiety or worry or in pain and misery. He wants us to remain the same in all situations to safeguard our hearts and keep ourselves safe. I immediately reached out to the machines that monitor the oxygen level, pulse, and heartbeat. I was overjoyed to see all was fine, with the first standing at 95, the next at 90, and the last at 121/81. 

Agathiyar explained that the idea of getting married was to satisfy certain bodily changes that have to take place. In the event one wants to forego marriage, he or she has to submit to doing God's work which he added was not going to come easy too.

He wants us to give some time to our practice besides making a livelihood, bringing bread and water to the table, and taking a rest. It is because he loves us that he is going that extra mile and taking that extra trouble to see us through this journey of brief moments of happiness and sadness, pain and suffering, and bring us to a state of peace and calm, and joy and bliss that is lasting forever. 

Agathiyar had placed numerous markers in our path and journey. In asking us each and every time why he or she came to the Siddha path he did not mean that we were unwelcomed but questioned what we did after coming to it. Did we discover for ourselves the path or adopt the path, method, way, and practice given by them? If neither it was then a wasted journey of mere talk and gatherings without any evolvement on the level of the soul. 

Charting the journey he brings us to dump the past karma by carrying out remedies as in going on holy pilgrimages, where walking the first mile itself would tend to exhaust us and help shed the baggage we brought with us. Next, he has us shed the rest by walking with the guru in physical form. By learning and taking up rituals we bring enhancement to the self and the environment. In carrying out charity we become compassionate to other beings and creatures. Learning and practicing Yoga we start the internal journey that activates the chakras and brings us to know the self and settle in the breath. With this state comes the Siddhis that are thrown in which brings the ability to access information and heal others, and many others that are secondary and not important to a true seeker, aspirant, and sadhaka whose goal is as Agathiyar revealed last evening to become one with his breath that is Sivam and Vaalai.

THE PRACTICE

When we purchase a thing off the shelf we look for the expiry date. What is the expiry date stamped on each of us then? Even our parents who manufactured us do not know when this product would expire. What keeps us alive and moving? The breath. It is said in Siddha texts that we come with a certain number of breaths that once exhausted leave us as a corpse. Take away the breath we are just like any other commodity that has expired. The breath is what makes it unique differentiating between the dead and alive. So we are asked to breathe. But as it is we are breathing each moment, right? So why is Agathiyar pushing the young and middle-aged to practice Pranayama as if time was running out for them too? What has he foreseen but was not revealing? As it is he says they have wasted some precious 2 1/2 years. There is a lot of catching up to do. Just as both Agathiyar and Ramalinga Adigal often asked us to look into the pages of Tavayogi's book "Andamum Pindamum" for answers and an understanding of the tatwas, they point us to the techniques that Tavayogi showed us when he was in Malaysia in 2008. I personally did not anticipate the power of these practices that could release the dormant powers within one till I saw for myself with practice and after Agathiyar revealed the transformation in later years. Neither did Tavayogi beat the drum when handing us this treasure for Agathiyar in the Nadi told me that what I had received was indeed a treasure house and true riches. 

When I began practicing these Asanas and Pranayama I saw an immediate influx of breath coming within that felt like a balloon about to burst. It was rejuvenating traveling right to the tips of the limbs. What I did not know was that the blow of breaths awakened the sleeping fire in the Muladhara. It traveled to Manipuraka where it stagnated after some two years. It was only after another 10 years that it was released by the grace of the divine to travel to the summit and settle there. But Agathiyar warns that we have to constantly keep watch of our actions lest they fall back into the lower chakras and it would be a wasted effort. What after this? I do not have any idea nor do I want to speculate. The one who giveth this could also snatch it away. One wrong move and we lose it. He is watching each and every move of us. When Jnana Jothiamma asks Goddess Ma why a holy man who had deviated was still gaining attention and respect, she answers that people do not know that his powers have left him. So has the divine left him to fend for himself. The divine shall leave us the moment we default. He thrives on the earlier publicity and popularity earned. 

So as Tavayogi did, Agathiyar had me transfer the baton, having me teach Mahindren and instruct him to teach the rest. Arming them with this life-changing tool, he sent them off to practice pre pandemic. But it is pretty obvious that none did it looking at the thrashing they got from Agathiyar last Thursday. Agathiyar had Mahindren show them again. They are to report to Agathiyar every first Sunday after the Full moon and stage before him what they have practiced. 

DON'T FORGET TO BREATH

Children are still connected with their homes, the source. They are divine in nature. The Buddha nature in them is very obvious. Agathiyar told us that they are connected with their breath and hence the reason they are considered Vaalai. It amazes me to recall how my granddaughter who is 7 now, had given me a lesson in purpose when she was much younger. During our play, she uttered that I do what I came for while she did what she had to do. This advice I came to know only recently was given by both Ramana Bhagawan and Yogi Ramsuratkumar too. How did this kid who knows not both these saints utter the same? What we adults need to do is to travel back to being a child. This lesson was taught by another granddaughter of mine. As she was 16 years of age but used to behave like her younger sister, her mother apprehended her. The teen replied, "Mother my sister cannot possibly come to my level, but I can surely go down to her level and play." The mother was stunned. She was also the one who tricked me into talking with her after I told her I wasn't going to, seeing her naughtiness. Knowing my weakness for Agathiyar, she, many years back as a kid told me that Agathiyar was in her house. Immediately I came out of my momentary silence and followed her. She took me to the room under the stairs and showed me the store, laughing loudly at having tricked me. When I asked why my grandchildren called me to play with them, they replied that it was because I went down to their level and played with them. I become their age going literally to the ground and becoming them be it at home or in public. 

This is how Agathiyar has come down for us too. Besides being a day of bringing the kids together Agathiyar took the opportunity to educate us the adults too. Agathiyar in coming to us tells couples to stick together and journey together. He in asking all those gathered why we came to the path, told us that the ideal was not about raising one's Kundalini but to know the breath. He reminded us numerous times that coming to the path was not to raise the Kundalini solely but to attain oneness with the breath that he initially defined as Uyir or life breath in a memo to us in 2020 and later as Vaalai recently and last evening revealed as Sivam itself, something that Tavayogi had told me in one of our walks together back then. Bhogar had us chant "Adhi Sivam, Jothi Sivam, Moola Sivam" when he came around some time back. 

Agathiyar is bent on getting everyone who comes over seeking him to go into meditation and not remain forever in rituals just as Tavayogi inspired us to move out of the devotion into Gnanam. To enable one to go into meditation he has to settle in his breath first. But before that, he has to become aware of his breath. Hence one has to take up Pranayama. Agathiyar is pushing the devotees who did not seriously take it up telling them that they wasted some 2 1/2 years of valuable time. 

While many can come up with numerous rosy and visually impressive definitions for meditation or Dhyanam, Agathiyar defines it in very simple terms telling us that following one's breath is Dhyanam. The breath would one day travel its way and we are told to tag along and immerse in it. That is Dhyanam.

நீயாய் சுவாசித்த பிராணவாயு இனி உன்னை கேட்காமல் உன்னுள் ஊடுருவும். எப்பொழுதெல்லாம்  அது ஊடுருவதை நீ உணறுகிறாயோ இருக்கும் இடம் அறிந்து அதனுள் பயணம் செய். கலந்து போ. அதனோடு நீ கலக்கும் தருணமே தியானம்.

Ramalinga Adigal came some time back to help us enhance the Jothi in us by asking us to travel with the breath. "Let the Jothi burn brightly within you. Put in the effort. To those who are aware, I shall come within." That is the only thing that they expect from us. It will bring us to merge in the Jothi.

உமது பிரணவத்தை கொண்டு செல்லு. முயற்சி செய். ஜோதி அதனைச் சுடர்விட செய்யுங்கள். ஜோதியோடு கலப்பாய். உன்னுள் ஜோதி எரியும்வரை நான் உன்னோடு வருவேன். ஆழ்ந்து இருப்போருடன் நான் சேர்ந்து இருக்கிறேன்.

Tavayogi wrote in his "Andamum Pindamum" that in the beginning, there was a light that enveloped all. That was Jothi. That was Sivan. From the passive Sivan came forth the dynamic Sivam. Sivam breathed life or Uyir into all his creation. 

ஆதியிலே வெட்டவெளியிலே தோன்றிய பிரகாசமே ஜோதி. எங்கும் வியாபித்து இருக்கக்கூடிய ஜோதியே சிவன். அந்த சிவன் என்ற ஜோதியிலே இருந்து சிவம் என்கிற ஆற்றல் உண்டானது.

A DAY OF REVELATION

It was yet another eventful day yesterday. The evening started with the AVM Kids lighting a small homam followed by the recitation of Agathiyar's name or Nama Japam led by Agathiyar. It gave us so much joy to see these children from a month old child to 10 years of age and the teens gather. After a break, Agathiyar came again and educated the small group he had called over on the importance of practice. He told them that they had whiled away some 2 1/2 years since he brought the shutters down on the AVM group, bringing a stop to doing puja and charity en-masse and having Mahindren teach them the Asana and Pranayama practice that Tavayogi showed us, and sent them on the way to do their individual practice. He reiterated again that if they had time for work and to eat and sleep why can't they allocate time for practice. There seemed to be a matter of urgency in Agathiyar bringing salvation to all those gathered and the few who did not turn up, whom he had me dial-up as he spoke to them. Agathiyar had to teach them the importance of the breath, which was the beginning and the end. He ended his two-hour session pointing out to us that the breath was Sivam. Period. He had Magindren show them again the Asana and Pranayama practice that was shown to us back then. 

Lord Murugan who was supposed to be at Batu Caves blessing his devotees gathered to celebrate Thaipusam took some time for us too. He had us sing some songs and took delight in it. After Agathiyar took all of us to task for our lackadaisical attitude to life, health, and the importance of practice, Lord Muruga brought some cheer and smile to us feeding us Pongal or sweet rice that was served to him. It reminded us of how Ramalinga Adigal came last Thaipusam and Lord Shiva came on Shivarathri to be with us while everyone else was at Vadalur and the abodes of Shiva respectively. 

The day ended on a happy note. The AVM Kids group was to turn up every first Sunday after Pornami to practice before Agathiyar. He was pretty serious about them keeping up with the practice. He finally had to draw down the shutters on puja at Pothihai Tharma Chakram. Agathiyar informed the host of his bronze statue formerly at AVM, and Lobama shall move to another residency soon. As for the charity arm that was registered as Persatuan Teman Setia (PTS) he asked that it too be dissolved so that they could move on from Sariyai and Kriyai to Yogam and Gnanam. 

This the the play or Lila that Agathiyar foretold us that he shall execute asking me to just observe and not interfere a day earlier.  Behind all the sternness shown by Agathiyar, he called up each and every one of us later and apologized for having to do so, reminding them of the importance of what was said. 

THE BIG DAY

We are told that the Gods and Goddesses too married and had spouses and these marriage ceremonies are reenacted in the temples annually as Tirukalyanam. We are told that the Siddhas too lived with their spouses. Today we stood witness to the Tirukalyanam of Agathiyar to Lobama. It was yet another day of excitement, filled with an element of surprise and the parting of more knowledge. As the "Magnificent Five" including the host and invitees gathered at Pothihai Tharma Chakram (PTC) this morning, we were surprised to have Bhogar introduce himself and inform us that he shall conduct the homam. In today's puja, Bhogar declared to us that Konganar and Theraiyar were present physically while Lord Siva and Agathiyar were in the subtle form. His recital was a brief praise of the qualities of the Siddhas and Erai in Tamil that were never heard before or found in texts. He then asked that we begin the marriage ceremony for Agathiyar and Lobama. The bathing ceremony or libation was followed by the Nalanggu ceremony and eventually the tying of the sacred thread that symbolizes the finale in a marriage ceremony. 

When Agathiyar came he told us that though he had done tapas and pujas he only attained the state of Puranam or completeness once Lobama came along. This brings us to the tale of Lord Siva who said the same to Agathiyar and had him betrothed to Lobama. When AVM posed a question asking as to the origin of Agathiyar, in a Nadi reading, he reminded us that it was not their nature to reveal their origin or parentage. But the most compassionate father went on to explain very very briefly his past. Agathiyar in his very first mortal birth, had the vision of Kailash at a very young age of 10. After the vision, he took up extreme tapas (tavam) including breath control. With the holy feet of the Sadguru forever in his thought, he reached a state of Nirmala at Kailash. Upon receiving theecha from Lord Kailai Shiva, he was blessed to be born a Siddha. It was a mystical birth. Agathiyar adds that it was not necessary to dwell on the source and the details (Rishimulam Nadhimulam). Born as a Siddha now and moving in the jungles, sustaining only on fruits, his thoughts fixed on Erai, having no attachment to the good or bad, he soon had the vision and grace of Goddess Vana Kali. Continuing with his seeking and search for realization, and upon accomplishment through further severe tavam, Lord Kailai Shiva shows him his vision in Pothigai. Merging with God, Agathiyar stayed on at Pothigai upon Lord Kailai Shiva's directive. While here he came to know about the medicinal benefits of various herbs and plants. Agathiyar received the names of Kudamuni, Kumbamuni, and other names from Lord Kailai Shiva. Going without food and remaining in silence, staying in the state of Vasi, adhering to the eight limbs of Ashtanga Yoga and performing extreme tapas, for the rest of the Yuga, gaining the Siddhi to travel through the air,  yet Lord Kailai Shiva told Agathiyar that there was something that he had failed to accomplish and do. When Agathiyar asked for further clarification, Lord Kailai Shiva laughed and looked him straight into his eyes, "Although you are an embodiment of Gnana, and those who hold on to your feet shall never face any disappointments, Gurumuni you do not have a companion as I do." Agathiyar was taken aback. He came to know that the Lord intended to get him engaged to the very representation of Mother Kaveri, and Kaberan's daughter, Lobamutrai. Hence in this Kali Yuga, his energy that was of Shiv Sakthi came to stay at Kalyana Theertam to bless all those who came seeking him and stood before him and Lobama, seeing them as a personification of Shiv Sakthi.

Agathiyar, in another Nadi reading, goes on to mention that his form in the granite statue at Agasthiyampalli was not a depiction of the state of yoga or Gnana but that of a state of joy in him (Agathiyar) on having seen and had the vision and darshan of Lord Shiv and Sakthi Ma in their marriage attire after their marriage in Kailash. Hence so are the replicas of Agasthiyampalli Agathiyar that formerly were at AVM and presently in PTC, and at Eco City Agathiyar temple. 

PV Jagadisa Ayyar in his book "South Indian Customs", Asian Educational Services, New Delhi, 1985, writes,

"... that of the definite aim of performing religious rites in company with his wife or (her husband) for the spiritual evolution of both. In fact, a wife is said to be a Saha Dharma Charini which means the lady who performs the duty enjoined in company with her husband."

He says that observances of religious rites develop spirituality in the observers. Rituals are the first step to spirituality. No one can bypass this major life-transforming phase. 

Jayaram V at https://www.hinduwebsite.com/hinduism/h_marriage.asp writes,

"According to Hinduism, marriage (vivaha) between two persons is a sacred relationship that is not limited to this life alone. It extends across seven or more lives, during which the couple helps each other progress spiritually."

The couple and hosts of today's puja have been together for the past 7 births as disclosed by Agathiyar. Agathiyar tells me that my wife and I were husband and wife in the last birth. Many of the couples in the AVM family were married to each other and were lovers in their past lives too. When my friend picked up a conversation with a girl waiting to have her Nadi reading, she hushed him for a while and became excited upon hearing her name mentioned to her male friend inside the room. When the boy was chatting with my friend and the girl was inside the room, he said that his name was being mentioned behind the closed door. They came as friends but left as a couple brought together in marriage by Agathiyar or rather their past.

PV Jagadisa Ayyar reiterates,

"Two souls come together and marry because their karmas are intertwined and they have to resolve many things together upon earth to ensure their mutual salvation. The relationship between a couple is essentially a relationship of the souls. Their gender roles don't need to be fixed forever. Sometimes they may switch roles and the husband may become the wife and the wife the husband. Sometimes they may also temporarily part their ways and come together again after one or two lives in a grand reunion."

When I told the priests in our neighborhood temple, that I did not match the horoscopes of my daughter and son-in-law to see if they were compatible or otherwise as they had chosen each other, the priests told me three things. If the couple liked each other there was no need to see the horoscopes. That itself was Mana Porutam or compatibility of the hearts. When two people come together in marriage it is the work of their combined karma or a karmic connection and it is fated. Finally, he told me to leave it to God to lead them on in their lives. His words brought me assurance then. Today, I have three wonderful grandchildren to run after and feed their inquisitive minds. 

The Siddhas never did shun marriage. Although they were immersed in austerities and worship, research, and discovery, absorbed in meditation, and chose solitude, they took on a wife as an aid towards their combined religious and spiritual accomplishments.

In the book on Kavyakantha Vasistha Ganapati Muni entitled "Nayana, A Biography of Kavyakantha Vasistha Ganapati Muni (from the original Telugu texts by Gunturu Lakshmikantam), Dr G Krishna mentions that Ganapati Muni had described his wife as a Tapa Sakhi, meaning comrade in Tapas just as Arundhati was the Tapa Sakhi of Vasistha and so were the wives of many of the Rishis.

"They never considered their wives as hindrances to Tapas."

Ganapati Muni advised that women should not be barred from any spiritual or religious chores when it was prevalent at that time that women were not considered fit to worship Agni, study the Vedas, and recite Vedic Mantra and were denied the benefits of Upayana. Ganapati Muni himself used to initiate women into Mantra Japa. Many were the women who were initiated into Gayathri Vidhya, which was considered exclusive to men. Visalakshi, wife of Ganapati Muni took to the worship of Agni whenever Ganapati Muni was out of station. 

"Visalakshi paid equal attention to housekeeping and Mantra Upasana. Ganapati did not share the belief that a woman was the source of sin and Maya. The study of scriptures had convinced him that the ancient rishis had practiced austerity and attained self-realization without giving up family life and responsibilities. Women were not treated as objects of pleasure by our ancient rishis. They were as qualified as men to discharge spiritual responsibilities. The ancient rishis by their exemplary behavior became spiritual preceptors to their wives and helped to establish a well-ordered society."

Looking towards Ramakrishna's life, we are shown that husband and wife can live together as spiritual companions.

"By his marriage, Sri Ramakrishna admitted the great value of marriage in man's spiritual evolution, and by adhering to his monastic vows he demonstrated the imperative necessity of self-control, purity, and continence, in the realization of God. By this unique spiritual relationship with his wife, he proved that husband and wife can live together as spiritual companions. Thus his life is a synthesis of the ways of life of the householder and the monk. (Source: http://www.ramakrishnavivekananda.info/gospel/introduction/relation_with_wife.htm)

"Sri Ramakrishna turned his mind to the fulfillment of imparting religious and spiritual teachings to her. About the experience of this period Sarada Devi used to say afterwards: “ I felt as if a vessel full of divine bliss was permanently installed in my heart...I can not adequately describe the heavenly joy which filled my heart...!” (Source: https://www.speakingtree.in/blog/the-story-of-a-holy-wife)

Just like Ganapathi Muni and Ramakrishna, Lahari Mahasaya too was a householder. Lahiri Mahasaya’s wife Ma Kashi Moni shares the moment when she realized her husband was a realized soul.

"It was years before I came to realize the divine stature of my husband. One night, in this very room, I had a vivid dream. Glorious angels floated in unimaginable grace above me. So realistic was the sight that I awoke at once; the room was strangely enveloped in dazzling light. My husband, in lotus posture, was levitated in the center of the room, surrounded by angels who were worshiping him with the supplicating dignity of palm-folded hands. Astonished beyond measure, I was convinced that I was still dreaming."

“Woman,” Lahiri Mahasaya said, “you are not dreaming. Forsake your sleep forever and forever.” As he slowly descended to the floor, I prostrated myself at his feet.

“Master,” I cried, “again and again I bow before you! Will you pardon me for having considered you as my husband? I die with shame to realize that I have remained asleep in ignorance by the side of one who is divinely awakened. From this night, you are no longer my husband, but my guru. Will you accept my insignificant self as your disciple?”

The master touched me gently. “Sacred soul, arise. You are accepted.”

He motioned toward the angels. “Please bow in turn to each of these holy saints.”

"When I had finished my humble genuflections, the angelic voices sounded together, like a chorus from an ancient scripture."

“Consort of the Divine One, thou art blessed. We salute thee.” They bowed at my feet and lo! their refulgent forms vanished. The room darkened."

"My guru asked me to receive initiation into Kriya Yoga."

“Of course,” I responded. “I am sorry not to have had its blessing earlier in my life.”

“The time was not ripe.” Lahiri Mahasaya smiled consolingly. “Much of your karma I have silently helped you to work out. Now you are willing and ready.”

He touched my forehead. Masses of whirling light appeared; the radiance gradually formed itself into the opal-blue spiritual eye, ringed in gold and centered with a white pentagonal star."

“Penetrate your consciousness through the star into the kingdom of the Infinite.” My guru’s voice had a new note, soft like distant music."

"Vision after vision broke as oceanic surf on the shores of my soul. The panoramic spheres finally melted in a sea of bliss. I lost myself in ever-surging blessedness. When I returned hours later to awareness of this world, the master gave me the technique of Kriya Yoga."

(Source: https://www.lahiri-mahasaya.org)

The exchange of garlands in a marriage is a ceremonious representation of bestowing a portion of their spiritual force to their life partner. PV Jagadisa Ayyar writes,

"This is the main end and aim to attain which all the subsequent rites (in a marriage and beyond) are observed to be continued thereafter day after day till perfection in evolution is attained in both taking many births even if need be as husband and wife."

"In the plan laid down by the wise men of old that two souls drawn together by love and sincerity do not part till both reach the level at the same time. This idea is conveyed in the Hindu marriage ceremonials and the Hindu marriage itself is considered a sacrament and not a contract."

When I met Tavayogi for the first time, he asked me to bring my wife along to his talk that evening. He told me it was not enough that I came to the path or Marga but I needed to bring my family too. He mentioned the same too that I needed to bring my wife and children on this journey of evolution of the soul, growing in luminosity, from a mere spark to a gigantic flame that eventually envelopes the self, merging with the source. Devotion and compassion arise that bring down within us the grace of God which then clears the path for us to venture further into transforming the self into the image of God. This is what several Nayanmars achieved bringing their wives and kin to merge in the flame or Jothi in the inner sanctum of God's abode. The young Gnanasambandhar took his wife's hand in marriage and led all those who had gathered to witness their marriage into the Jothi and merged with it at Nallur.

PV Jagadisa Ayyar concludes on the marriage, "The final function is what is known as Asirvatham or blessing of the bridal pair."

The priest invokes the Gods to come down and be present, to be a witness in this Holy matrimony between two souls, then request them to bestow their blessings on the newlyweds, himself transmitting the blessings to the couple, after which family, relatives, and friends shall bestow their blessings for a good life. Marriage is a new beginning for a couple where the bride takes the groom's hand in the presence of kin and friends. Besides the families and friends, all the divine beings of the other world or plane, gods and goddesses, the lineage of gurus, and their ancestors gather together for this momentous moment in time. Tavayogi who graced my daughter's wedding told me later that all the Siddhas had come to bless our kids too. Later Agathiyar and Lord Muruga in their Nadi reading tell the newlywed that the Siddhas were witnesses to their marriage.

When a friend from Bangalore had too many obstacles in finding the right partner, I suggested he do a homam in his home daily, asking God to give him the boon of bestowing the right wife for him. He did as told and found results. They are married today.

Once married, the newly married couple and their family circle would look towards the couple begetting a child. Prayers are channeled towards God for a child to be born to them. Above and beyond our prayers, the Siddhas too are praying for a family in which these elevated souls could take birth and carry on God's mission. Tomorrow we shall celebrate these children coming into our lives and bringing cheer and happiness. Agathiyar today explained why children are compared to Vaalai. He also pointed out how we have misunderstood the worship of Vaalai, portraying her as a 10-year-old and worshipping her externally. How misguided could we possibly be? This is only one instance. What about all the rest? We wonder if there was any truth in them too? He told us that the truth of the matter was that it is the breath that is to be worshiped. He tells us that children are ever conscious of their breath and live in it. Hence they are equated to the breath that is Vaalai. 

Another drama and a divine play unfolded before us again. Agathiyar again tested the new hosts whether they were willing to end rituals, part with their statues, and move on to Gnanam. He had previously shocked them saying Agathiyar was leaving. But seeing their depth of devotion Agathiyar gave them time to come out of it. Today he asks them if they want to be with him or merge with him. He reiterated that the next phase would start once they are ready to let go of all attachments. He wanted everyone to enter the next phase that of Gnanam. He only wanted to see that at PTC too.

I was surprised that Agathiyar put forth the same question to me as to how to define and identify Gnanam that we had talked about some time back. I told him what he had taught us earlier which is that the experiences he gives take a turn and have us move on an internal journey that traverses the many chakras till it reaches the Sahasrara. This was Gnanam. He replied that I understood well but that others didn't. He asked me how was I going to teach this to others? He answered his own question telling me "In remaining quiet and observing the breath." I understood that he was asking me to bring them to the next level, from rituals and worship to an internal journey of traveling the chakras by sitting quietly and observing the breath. He gave us simple breathing techniques and the art of observing the breath to be carried out in the mornings and evenings. Then with deep concern, Agathiyar voiced his frustration in waking up these souls from their deep sleep of ignorance and indifference to the urgency of reforming immediately. Agathiyar said that when we don't give reasons to eat, sleep, or make a fortune, we sure do give reasons when asked to put in the practices. He said the effort is ours. They can only show the way and the practice. He also voiced out that if we do not take care of our health the mucus or Kapham if left unexpelled would obstruct air flow. He said that he would address these issues in tomorrow's sitting and asked us to remain calm and stay witness to what is to take place tomorrow. He told us that he shall see to it and through it. When Vaalai Ma told us yesterday that she would carry out the Vizha, I was puzzled how it was to be. But seeing Bhogar come and carry out today's homam I got an idea of how it works. Now I understand what Agathiyar meant in the Jeeva Nadi reading by Tavayogi at AVM in 2016 where he and Mataji came for my daughter's wedding, that Ganapathy Murthy conducted the day's puja.

Just as I eagerly looked forward to the day to dawn to witness the holy matrimony of Agathiyar to Lobama I look forward to tomorrow's Vizha with great anticipation. 

I shall update readers on the outcome of our encounters with the Siddhas, Agathiyar, and Vaalai tomorrow.

AGATHIYAR LOBAMA WEDDING

An interesting turn of events took place today. The couple Sri Krishna and Sri Deviy who are the new hosts of the Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) Agathiyar statue dropped by to invite us to their home Pothihai Tharma Chakram (PTC) to witness the wedding ceremony of Agathiyar to his spouse Lobama tomorrow. M Sankar Aiya who is the caretaker of Agathiyar Sannadhi at the famed Adhi Kumbeswar temple in Kumbakonam apparently had sent them an invite and notice of the wedding ceremony to be carried out by devotees in India too. I too had forwarded to them the invitation. This triggered the couple to want to carry out the wedding ceremony as Lobama had arrived at their home too and was keeping Agathiyar company now. When Agathiyar was at AVM he was a bachelor but after moving to PTC he had Lobama accompany him also as a bronze statue. 

Prapanjam Ma came followed by Lobama and finally Vaalai giving us a pleasant surprise. Prapanjam Ma spoke about the future that was in store for each of us. She asked us to receive her energy by holding hands. Lobama spoke regarding tomorrow's event and extended an invitation too. Vaalai Ma spoke about the Vizha or celebration for Agathiyar that will be held at AVM on Thaipusam day too. She told us to leave it to her. Just as Agathiyar told us she too said that she would come as the breath to bless all during that day. We were truly touched and brought to tears. We are truly blessed to have the divine come and address and guide us. We shall update readers after we return from the wedding.

100. பேறடைவு
pēṟaṭaivu

எழுசீர்க் கழிநெடிலடி ஆசிரிய விருத்தம்

திருச்சிற்றம்பலம்

• 1. மணம்புரி கடிகை இரண்டரை எனும்ஓர்
  வரையுள தாதலால் மகனே
  எணம்புரிந் துழலேல் சவுளம்ஆ தியசெய்
  தெழில்உறு மங்கலம் புனைந்தே
  குணம்புரிந் தெமது மகன்எனும் குறிப்பைக்
  கோலத்தால் காட்டுக எனவே
  வணம்புரி மணிமா மன்றில்என் தந்தை
  வாய்மலர்ந் தருளினர் மகிழ்ந்தே.
  
• 2. எம்பொருள் எனும்என் அன்புடை மகனே
  இரண்டரைக் கடிகையில் உனக்கே
  அம்புவி வானம் அறியமெய் அருளாம்
  அனங்கனை333 தனைமணம் புரிவித்
  தும்பரும் வியப்ப உயர்நிலை தருதும்
  உண்மைஈ தாதலால் உலகில்
  வெம்புறு துயர்தீர்ந் தணிந்துகொள் என்றார்
  மெய்ப்பொது நடத்திறை யவரே.
  
• 3. அன்புடை மகனே மெய்யருள் திருவை
  அண்டர்கள் வியப்புற நினக்கே
  இன்புடை உரிமை மணம்புரி விப்பாம்
  இரண்டரைக் கடிகையில் விரைந்தே
  துன்புடை யவைகள் முழுவதும் தவிர்ந்தே
  தூய்மைசேர் நன்மணக் கோலம்
  பொன்புடை விளங்கப் புனைந்துகொள் என்றார்
  பொதுநடம் புரிகின்றார் தாமே.
  
• 4. ஈதுகேள் மகனே மெய்யருள் திருவை
  இரண்டரைக் கடிகையில் நினக்கே
  ஊதியம் பெறவே மணம்புரி விப்பாம்
  உண்மைஈ தாதலால் இனிவீண்
  போதுபோக் காமல் மங்கலக் கோலம்
  புனைந்துளம் மகிழ்கநீ என்றார்
  தீதுதீர்த் தென்னை இளந்தையில் தானே
  தெருட்டிய சிற்சபை யவரே.
  
• 5. விரைந்துகேள் மகனே உலகெலாம் களிக்க
  மெய்யருள் திருவினை நினக்கே
  வரைந்துநன் மணஞ்செய் தொருபெரு நிலையில்
  வைத்துவாழ் விக்கின்றோம் அதனால்
  இரைந்துளம் கவலேல் இரண்டரைக் கடிகை
  எல்லையுள் எழில்மணக் கோலம்
  நிரைந்துறப் புனைதி என்றுவாய் மலர்ந்தார்
  நிருத்தஞ்செய் ஒருத்தர்உள் உவந்தே.
  
• 6. களிப்பொடு மகனே அருள்ஒளித் திருவைக்
  கடிகைஓர் இரண்டரை அதனில்
  ஒளிப்பிலா துலகம் முழுவதும் அறிய
  உனக்குநன் மணம்புரி விப்பாம்
  அளிப்புறு மகிழ்வால் மங்கலக் கோலம்
  அணிபெறப் புனைகநீ விரைந்தே
  வெளிப்பட உரைத்தாம் என்றனர் மன்றில்
  விளங்குமெய்ப் பொருள்இறை யவரே.
  
• 7. கலங்கிடேல் மகனே அருள்ஒளித் திருவைக்
  களிப்பொடு மணம்புரி விப்பாம்
  விலங்கிடேல் வீணில் போதுபோக் காமல்
  விரைந்துநன் மங்கலக் கோலம்
  நலங்கொளப் புனைந்து மகிழ்கஇவ் வுலகர்
  நவிலும்அவ் வுலகவர் பிறரும்
  இலங்கநின் மணமே ஏத்துவர் என்றார்
  இயலுறு சிற்சபை யவரே.
  
• 8. ஐயுறேல் இதுநம் ஆணைநம் மகனே
  அருள்ஒளித் திருவைநின் தனக்கே
  மெய்யுறு மகிழ்வால் மணம்புரி விப்பாம்
  விரைந்திரண் டரைக்கடி கையிலே
  கையற வனைத்தும் தவிர்ந்துநீ மிகவும்
  களிப்பொடு மங்கலக் கோலம்
  வையமும் வானும் புகழ்ந்திடப் புனைக
  என்றனர் மன்றிறை யவரே.
  
• 9. தூங்கலை மகனே எழுகநீ விரைந்தே
  தூயநீர் ஆடுக துணிந்தே
  பாங்குற ஓங்கு மங்கலக் கோலம்
  பண்பொடு புனைந்துகொள் கடிகை
  ஈங்கிரண் டரையில் அருள்ஒளித் திருவை
  எழில்உற மணம்புரி விப்பாம்
  ஏங்கலை இதுநம் ஆணைகாண் என்றார்
  இயன்மணி மன்றிறை யவரே.
  
• 10. மயங்கிடேல் மகனே அருள்ஒளித் திருவை
  மணம்புரி விக்கின்றாம் இதுவே
  வயங்குநல் தருணக் காலைகாண் நீநன்
  மங்கலக் கோலமே விளங்க
  இயங்கொளப் புனைதி இரண்டரைக் கடிகை
  எல்லையுள் என்றுவாய் மலர்ந்தார்
  சயங்கொள எனக்கே தண்ணமு தளித்த
  தந்தையார் சிற்சபை யவரே.
• https://www.thiruarutpa.org/thirumurai/v/T338/tm/peerataivu
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