I am glad that the Nadi reader Senthilkumar of Avinashi passed me a pamphlet from Thaai Veedu Thangarasan M.A, seeking funds to build a temple cum ashram for Agathiyar at Kallar. This piece of paper was to bring me to Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal @ Thaai Veedu Thangarasan M.A a couple of years later. He was a man of few words until he took the stand. He then made his stand known to the crowd that gathered to hear him out. His only mantra was the name Agathiyar. And so he asked that I hold on to Agathiyar and not him on the very same day I invited him over to my house in 2005, after telling me that I was living in Maya, thinking he was a holy man who had something beneath his clothing. Though it hurt me back then, I realized later that he had shown me to the source, Agathiyar. Though I never tattooed his name on my body, though I never dressed like him, though I never took the stage, he has etched his name deep within me. So has Agathiyar. Both my gurus live in me. That is the reason why, when Agathiyar, who asked that I commission his statue in bronze and worship him in 2010, asked me to send him away to another devotee's home in 2024, I did not shed a tear nor object. That is the reason why Agathiyar, who began sending youths over to my home to watch and participate in our home puja beginning in 2013, had me bring the shutters down: I did not shed a tear nor object. That is the reason why, when Tavayogi told me from his hospital bed that in the event he does not return to his ashram...... I did not shed a tear. As Tavayogi had me drop or let go of all that I had desired, and Agathiyar had me drop and let go of everything that he either initiated or tasked me to do, it came easily to me to drop another and another and another. But when Agathiyar told me that I had to even let him go, I told him, "How could I possibly do that?" He was my God, Guru, Savior, Guardian, Angel, Father, Mother, Companion, Friend, and everything to me. He was the very post that I was leaning on. He was the very tree under which I took shade. That is when he asked me, "How are we to be one?" I understood and accepted in silence and humility. He was bringing me from Dvaita to Advaita. He was bringing me to the One, Yegan, Sivam. I am grateful to my gurus.
