Saturday, 2 February 2019

LESSONS IN LIFE

Although we will keep coming back again and again, make good use of this life for it will determine the next. Grab hold of a saint's feet to find the means of not coming back for good. In the event these saints came back, it was not that they were here to settle scores and for reasons of unfulfilled desires or to repent for their past karma but to help their disciples and others gain ground and rise above the torment of worldly life and end the cycle of death and birth, as they themselves did.

These are the siddhas, ever willing to come back for us, if only we reached out for them. The siddhas shall look into our past and recommend remedies to first remove the veil of karma. Next through worship and service they open both the gates to heaven and the gates of our hearts respectively. All we need to do is disengage ourselves from insisting that we want things to go our way but instead let the divine move things, events and us, eventually moving in us. The divine then does its work through us. We become his humble servant, disciple, friend and a representative of him. We become an image of him, adored by others for carrying the qualities of Erai. Seek to gain the qualities or tanmai of Erai, not the super powers of the divine. If Erai wills he shall then pass on these powers as gifted to Ramalinga Adigal.

I used to wonder why the masters never stopped their disciples from falling at their feet, performing libation on them, dressing them up as deities etc. The masters need only to tell them that it was wrong, and this practice would stop. Then I figured if the master were to say so, it would only mean that he still made decisions based on likes and dislikes, giving consent for something and stopping something else. A master would have to have no likes and dislikes, he should not have wants and has to be indifferent to all things happening. I figured than that that was the reason they gave in to all the antics of their devotees and disciples. Then came a time when things took place beyond our control too. We did not like what was happening. We spoke our mind to Agathiyar. He put a stop to it. But it was only temporary as we were soon to find out. He still held on to the thin string that attached us to his leela or play. I suppose he figured out that we were not ready for the act to fall into place. We had strictly told him our concern and fear; that we felt threatened and confused; we did not want to end up as a shaman, medicine man or want our home to become a place for people to congregate and wait to be healed or wait to hear a prophecy or prediction made.

When everything had quietened down on the front, and so we thought, he made me realize that he was doing his work and was only using our venue and sometimes us as a medium. He assured me that it would not inconvenience us or put my family in danger. They asked me to step aside and just watch their leela take place.

Then sometime last year Lord Muruga ask me to submit and give in to their wishes. He told me to allow everything to take place. I did as told. The moment "I" backed off and took the stance of being a watcher, the divine manifested and did its work.

Having had these experiences and fully understanding the state of the masters who never lifted a hand in objecting to their disciples adoring and worshiping them, I have again placed before them my wish that it should all stop, so that I may progress further. I did not want to be stagnated in this stage. I believe they are listening and will bring about the necessary change.

The guru comes to redeem us. In the process he might give us a beating; a slap to wake us up from our dream and illusion; break us or totally ignore us. The "us" he sees is the soul and not our physical form, caste, race, beliefs or others. The guru works on our soul. Both the souls of the guru and disciple were connected before and shall remain connected for life and beyond.

When Tavayogi came into my life, there was now a fatherly figure in my life again, who was connected with Erai. I was 43. He was 69. He confirmed that I had come to the right place to gain and secure knowledge about the siddhas. He asks Perumal of the local body in Batu Caves that was affiliated to his Peedham in Kallar, to arrange for him to initiate me the same day. He explained what he was doing back at his ashram. He invited me over to India. Before I left, he asks that I bring my family too to the path, and to the event that evening. He took my little daughter onto his lap. He was rather intrigued and amused with her for asking questions about the soul. Meanwhile my wife asked why she was having dreams daily in which saints appeared. He patiently explained and clarified to both my little daughter and my wife. My wife and I were officially initiated into the path of the siddhas that evening. A guru disciple bond was cemented that day.

I took to Kallar right behind his heels after his departure. He invited me with open arms to his humble cottage. We took a dip in the river, dined together and spoke for hours till night fell. As there was no electricity we were forced to end our conversation and retire early. The next morning he invited me on his morning walk around the neighbourhood and nearby woods. As we walked, he told me that Agathiyar had come the night before and asked him what he was going to give me. I looked at him in silence. He continued that he asked Agathiyar what he should give and Agathiyar had replied that he would let him know. We took our bath in the river and had breakfast together. He then asked if I wanted to visit living gurus or the caves of Konganar in Uthiyur. I picked the caves. Next we were on the way to Konganar's cave.

As he sat, eyes closed, I and an elderly man who accompanied us recited the names of the siddhas. Soon we too closed our eyes and sat in silence. Upon opening my eyes, Tavayogi applied the sacred ash on my forehead. There were more from where it came, in a piece of newspaper before us. I asked him where it had come from. He asked the same of me! Puzzled, I was shown my very first miracle there that day.

The next day he took me to see three living gurus or heads of various establishment, where he pointed out to me the nature of each one of them. One was eyeing for the post vacated by the demise of his guru at an ashram; the other was absorbed in rituals in his temple; while finally he showed me a gnani, curled up, all alone on his bed, in the cold of the monsoon rain that poured down on us. I was taught that even gurus differ in status, my first lesson.

Tavayogi took me to more places including those that Agathiyar wanted me to visit in my Gnana Kaandam. See https://agathiyarvanam.blogspot.com/2013/07/tavayogi-thangarasan-adigal-tavayogi.html Before I returned to Malaysia, he gave my another initiation in private, telling me he had fulfilled and granted Agathiyar's wish.

I was very contented upon returning from India in that year of 2005. The year 2013 saw me make another visit, this time with my family, as the word was around that Tavayogi was ill. Agathiyar too asks me to visit him in the nadi. Upon arrival at Kallar ashram we were relieved to see him hale and healthy as he walked up to invite us in. I understood that all that I heard was meant to change my standing and to lure me to visit my guru again. Earlier I was steadfast in that I did not want to venture nowhere again and did not want to meet any more gurus, although Agathiyar had mentioned them in later nadi readings. Agathiyar listened to my wishes and never brought up the subject till this visit. See https://agathiyarvanam.blogspot.com/2013/10/in-presence-of-tavayogi-again.html

During this visit Tavayogi permitted my family and I to sing the praise of the siddhas as we have been doing as a family back in Malaysia. At the end of the prayer he mentioned that his dream had come true. The seeds he had sowed in the soils of Malaysia had germinated. That was the greatest accreditation for a student from his guru.

The year 2016 saw him and Mataji come down to Malaysia to grace my daughter's wedding. The whole (then) AVM family were overjoyed to have him visit their homes. We arranged to perform the homam, abhisegam and have him give a small talk in all the homes he visited. The host sat with his/her family to conduct these prayers, carried out to Tavayogi's joy and amazement. He left Malaysia telling us again that now the seedlings had taken a strong hold and shall emerge as apostles of the siddhas. Again we felt elated hearing these words from the guru. Agathiyar has at numerous times mentioned in the many nadi readings that
 I and the rest at ATM family have had, that he was happy with our work.

But all was not rosy on the path in the beginning. When I invited Tavayogi to my home back then in 2005 for the very first time after we met, he conducted a small prayer and my family members, friends and he engaged in small talk before we served him food. I was elated that day at having a yogi in my home. As we got into the car driven by my nephew, to send him back to the peedham where he was staying for that duration in Malaysia, I mentioned that I was happy to have him grace my home and that he was the very first holy man to step into my humble home. I did not expect a rebuttal from him that was equivalent to a slap on the face. He told me I was living in Maya or illusion and that he was not a holy man but just an ordinary person. Hearing those words, I zipped up for the rest of the journey. Today I am grateful to him for having said those words, otherwise I would have adored and worshiped him and not the energy, light and jhothi within us all. He regarded that energy as Agathiyar. He had passed the message to me to worship the force within and not him.

When strangers began to frequent my home and shared their problems, worries and sufferings, as my wife and I were good listeners, we did what comes natural to all of us. We began advising and showing them ways to come out of their misery. That was the mistake we did that landed us in trouble. Going back to Tavayogi for advise he asked me why did I choose to involve in their problems? There was Agathiyar sitting majestically in my home. I should have pointed them to him. Let them pour out their grievances to him. That was another slap in the face I received from my guru.

Along the way Tavayogi acknowledged that compared to him having to travel far and wide in search of Agathiyar, Agathiyar had come quite easily to us. It was a compliment. I am grateful to Agathiyar. He asked me to come to his path in the nadi. He sent me Tavayogi. He decided to remain in my home as a bronze statue, changing his mind and initial intention to leave for the Jegathguru Sri Raghavendra Mrithiga Brindavanam Kinta in Ipoh upon completion of the premises. Today he graces ATM, listening on to all our conversations and surprising us often. Now he wants us to move house since he says there won't be space to accommodate all the devotees of his who will make their way over to my home. When I told this to my father-in-law, he offered a piece of land in his town. I am grateful to him but the hive of activity is here in Kuala Lumpur. The ATM family is stationed in and around Kuala Lumpur and Semenyih. The driving force behind ATM are the many youngsters living here. The idea to build or move into a larger premise is to have people patronage the place of worship. It would defeat the purpose if I was to move to another state.

I have let it rest at that. Agathiyar and his guru Lord Muruga will figure it all out for us. As always we shall carry out their directives once it is made known to us. We await their command.