I asked my wife what the difference was between us and others who worshipped Agathiyar, including those who ran centers under his name.
When Agathiyar asked me to build him a temple in my very first Nadi reading in 2002, I became pretty excited, as anyone would. But as my resources were limited, I scouted for a place in existing temples where, if the temple committee permitted, I could install his statue. But as none gave their consent, I dropped my venture.
Looking around for further guidance in the worship of Agathiyar after I was called to come to it in my very first Nadi reading in 2002, and feeling disappointed, I gathered whatever material I had on hand and could get hold of and started singing their praises at my home puja.
Having met Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar Ashram in 2005, I was initiated into doing rituals, including lighting the sacred fire, the Homam, and feeding the poor and looking into what they lacked. If many, upon coming to the Siddha path, fulfil their heart's desire to establish, head, and run centers, taking the stage to speak about the Siddhas, and while others approached Tavayogi to officiate a Peedham or society on his numerous visits to Malaysia, I refrained from asking, for I had no intention of starting one. I had seen and heard enough problems and troubles in the existing movements, groups, peedhams, ashrams and temples.
Then Agathiyar, in coming in the Nadi reading for both my brother-in-law and me in 2009, had me commission his statue in bronze in Swamimalai and asked that I install him at the Sri Raghavendra Mritiga Brindavanam Kinta in Ipoh, which my brother-in-law was building then. Arriving early in 2010, and while awaiting the completion of the Brindavanam, Agathiyar stayed at my humble home. He then chose to stay put in my home for reasons only he knows. I began to carry out the bathing ritual too. Bringing youths to my home after their respective Nadi readings, in 2013, my home became the epicenter of Puja and charity, taking on the name of Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM). I was satisfied with my home puja and the occasional gathering of his devotees on auspicious days. The divine listened and shelved their own plan to move and expand the premises too. After bringing the shutters down in 2019, he had me go within and work on myself. Soon the elaborate rituals that I had undertaken earlier, after gathering much information on the Siddhas, dwindled to mere minutes as I was moved to go within. The large gathering of devotees dwindled too, leaving behind only the cream.
Through some sixty-one Nadi readings as of 29 December 2019, and numerous instructions from the divine during their quick and short manifestations through devotees, in the absence of the Nadi readers who returned to India in the wake of the pandemic, Agathiyar groomed and guided us well and brought me to a state of Paripuranam, that of total satisfaction and contentment. But as a student of his, I did ask Tavayogi if there was more to be done, asking for further directions on his last visit to Malaysia in 2016. He replied that Agathiyar would direct us. Just as Tavayogi said, none of this was my doing. I guess Agathiyar was mapping my journey on a day-to-day basis rather than having me walk the track and groove imprinted on the vinyl disc called fate. He was charting a new destiny for me.
I can imagine what would have happened if not for his move to end it all in the wake of the pandemic.
- The home would have become a center where everyone kept converging,
- Feeling that things were getting congested with the arrival of new seekers, the thought of moving to a larger premises would have taken shape;
- Feeling the new and larger expanse in the venue and the followers would have gotten into my head;
- I would need to look into finding the resources to manage and administer the center;
- I might need to manage the brushing of shoulders and ego amongst the followers;
- A new fear of to whom I would hand over the running of the center would arise.
These are only a few of the countless other things that I might face. I am glad that Agathiyar saved me from getting stuck and remaining at this stage and phase for the rest of my life.
