Sunday 2 April 2023

YEGAN

"Where do I begin, To tell the story of how great a love can be, The sweet love story that is older than the sea," asks Andy Williams in his love song from "Love Story". Similarly, where do we begin to tell the tale of our love for the divine? It is a love affair that is dated since time immemorial. Though many of us have forgotten our lover he has never forgotten us. After each birth ends we are reminded of our love affair only to forget it in the next birth again. The saints though have remembered it and worked towards bridging both worlds or planes and meeting up with their lovers. We too can bridge the worlds and become just like the saints. It can all take place here, not in a distant world or another plane. Neither after death. It is possible right here where we stand, in this body and mind. Let us take the plunge here, right now. Start first as a bhakta or devotee, seeing him as God in the heavens. Let us worship the divine and his messengers. With devotion and surrender, seeing our keenness to know him, he then comes as a guru. He preaches his ways and teaches us the means and methods and takes us on a journey, first an external one showing his abodes and places in the hope that it might rekindle our past memories with him in other lives. Later we move within on an internal journey where we experience not the sights and sounds but his presence as vibrations and energy that were prevalent in those places we visited earlier, now right within us in this body. Soon we sense his presence and his vibrations all around us and in everything. But before all this is possible we need to prepare the body to receive his visit, his presence, and energy just as we clean up the home to usher visitors. But before all this is possible we need his grace. But before that is showered on us we need to place the efforts toward reaching him. But before that is undertaken we need the blessings of all those around us, both visible and invisible. 

We need the blessings of our parents, ancestors, family, friends, and others that go towards rendering a conducive environment and space to engage with our daily material lives, and that provides for a conducive state of mind, and good health. When a devotee stood before Thavathiru Rengaraja Desigar asking to be blessed with a child, he asked her to donate a certain number of sacks of rice. When she shared her meeting with him with me I wondered what donating this got to do with conceiving a child. Today I pretty well understand the subtle workings behind each action of ours, and the butterfly effect it has on everything around us. In donating the rice to the hungry, they shall bless the souls who provided a meal for them. All these blessings come back as flower petals showering on the giver and making way for his or her wishes to be fulfilled. What we have gained in life has to be left behind and we carry anything with us said Supramania Swami as he passed on even his hard-earned merits that came from his forty years of Tapas and austerities to me. Hence the reason we fall at the feet of our elders seeking their blessings as at weddings. A part of the good that they did shall shower on us. Hence the reason we fall at their feet for their blessings before beginning a new venture or journey. Their blessings shall follow us and protect us. Similarly if one returns from a pilgrimage the grace of the divine follows him into his home upon his return and is showered on others who were not able to follow. The very Prasad that comes from these holy places is charged with their Grace that the divine can manifest in these. 

After getting sufficient blessings, then comes the toughest part - our effort. As with motivational talks, the hype is for a few days after which it dies off. As with any practice, the hype is for a few days before we let go of the practices. But one disciplined and perseveres sees results. Soon the initial efforts placed towards it on our part become effortless with his grace. His grace is showered on us without our asking. As Tavayogi said that our effort is only two steps until the Svadhisthana, they shall rope us in and pull us up further. They turn the tide in our favor. We then begin to reap the benefits of all our efforts but not before we are cleansed of past karma and purified to the soul. 

When I met Thavathiru Rengaraja Desigar many years ago in 2003, he kept silent when I asked for his blessings. Finally, he told me setting foot at his Kudil itself was a blessing. I left disappointed and confused. Today I understand the subtle message he conveyed through that statement and his refusal to bless me. I should have asked for his Arul or Grace. His Kudil was already electrified with the energies of the Siddhas that are worshiped here and the number of acts of Dharma carried out all these years, something that we did not know and realize or could experience or feel then as we were just taking a fresh step then. As the very air around them and their abodes themselves already carries their blessings, saints give their grace that follows and transforms us, only when asked for.

We need the grace of gurus and the divine to tear down the veils and curtains that prevent us from knowing our Soul or Atma. The guru who has come to show us the way becomes a close buddy sharing his thoughts and visions with us. We lose sight of our own ambitions and begin to take on the vision of our guru. Soon love blossoms in our hearts. As yearning for his love blossoms and builts it comes to a point where the very love tears our hearts and tears us not able to see him, hug him, and speak to him. There is never a day that goes by without being in his presence and in his arms. We look forward to engaging in matrimony with him where we can always be in his arms and bosom 24/7. We merge together in divine matrimony eventually. All journeys both external and internal fall out as we embrace him and his energies and vibration take a sweep on us, swirling us and lifting us off our feet, and throwing us aside to experience the brief moment of the merger. He consumes us and we lose our own identity. We are one - Yegan.