I often consult Suren if my writings are intruding into the faith and beliefs of others. He tells me "It is only your experience and what you learnt from it that you are sharing." Then Ma comes along to endorse that my learning through experience will serve as Gnana for others. She adds that the Siddha path is one of learning or padipinai. That was very consoling. Agathiyar had asked that I continue writing although I thought my perception and ideas and the frenzied urge to bring change in our mindsets were not compatible or welcomed in the current society. Hence I wanted to wind up and call it a day many a time.
Along this path, Agathiyar has opened my eyes to many things, at times conforming with my thoughts and at other times disapproving it. But he lets me know of his stand just as I let him know mine. There is mutual respect between us. He remains silent when I disapprove of something and I chose to keep quiet when he states his mind.
When I asked Tavayogi why he kept repeating the talks he gave at the numerous venues including at his ashram he asked me if I had followed his teachings, asking and dictates. He was actually referring to the masses that sat before him and left only to forget to uphold what he had preached. He added that he could only move on if we followed what was said or taught. Similarly, we seek the grace of the Siddhas but are not prepared to sacrifice our time and money in the worship of them, in the rituals that they have laid out for us, or in the activities laid out for us towards performing charity. We are only too keen to get whatever parikaram done and over with and expect results overnight. We do not go beyond the stipulated parikaram to help the poor, to do daily puja, or to feed the hungry or provide clothing at other times. Once the parikarams are covered we stop engaging in these activities. The idea here is to continuously maintain a rapport with Erai so that he too continuously looks over our shoulders, keeping danger at bay.
Many think that parikara or rituals can be privatised to others and they need only grace the puja, pray for the moment asking for all their hearts desires to be fulfilled, and keep checking the calendar for the desired results. One has to get his hands dirty, shop for the items, lay them out, and prepare and conduct the puja personally. The gist of doing all these parikara is to get us involved in these rituals so that we shall continue doing them, rather than think that remedies are one-off and discontinue doing them after seeing the results. While it is true that a parikara or puja is advocated for as a specific remedy for our past sins there is no harm in continuing basic puja and feeding or charity for these acts would enhance our merits to counter further day to day karma.
We can only see results if we work for it. There is no other way out. No amount of buying, outsourcing or privatising will help here. One has to prepare and conduct puja. One has to purchase or cook and deliver food himself. One has to attend in person and not send proxies. When we get involved on the ground these simple acts of puja and charity open up our hearts. The heart mellows. Compassion arises. The act of doing charity is then done at every opportunity available and not only when told by the astrologer reading the horoscope or when the Siddha instructs in the Nadi.
This was what I was taught. This is what we teach at AVM. We never intended AVM (present day ATM) to be a place where everyone converges every Thursday to sing the praise of the Siddhas, and forget about them till the next Thursday arrives. Here we want each of us to engage in prayers in their own homes, in their own rooms, at their own altars. We want them to speak to Erai directly without a medium. We want them to start a relationship with Erai; first, as one of Erai's creation, then as his servant, then his son followed by his companion, moving on to becoming his lover and finally seeing him as his or her child. When we are so used to asking as in the relationships prior to arriving at that of Erai as a child, once we arrive at this parent-child relationship, we would go all the way out to provide for Erai. We would not neglect our child even for a single day, would we? This is the actual concept of temple and idol worship too. This is the ultimate relationship we are trying to build here - that of a parent-child relationship. Going through the songs of the great saints of the past, we come to see this distinctive relationship between them and Erai. From asking and receiving, we now stop asking but instead start to give. This attitude is then carried and upheld in all our daily routines too.
We at ATM have brought much change within us and in our routines, coming out from the conventional and run-of-the-mill thoughts. We have fostered a brotherhood (and sisterhood too) that requires us to close our doors to other's thoughts that could disrupt the peace and serenity of this family. We are under the tutelage and guidance of the Siddhas whose directives sometimes are not applicable to the common man. Hence to avoid providing an avenue for others not receptive of these thoughts and start a debate or quarrel or tarnish the acts in bad faith, there is now a reason and need for this blog to go private.
We are slowly learning to perfect our thoughts and deeds, bringing positive but very simple changes. At ATM we respect the early comers. Puja shall start the moment the first devotee arrives for it is not fair to those who have arrived early to wait for others who turn up late nor fair to hold up on the puja for a latecomer just to accommodate him.
We are slowly learning to perfect our thoughts and deeds, bringing positive but very simple changes. At ATM we respect the early comers. Puja shall start the moment the first devotee arrives for it is not fair to those who have arrived early to wait for others who turn up late nor fair to hold up on the puja for a latecomer just to accommodate him.
A simple thing as a Whatsapp group is run tightly, making sure that only news of the group's events or opinions or articles of fellow members is posted. We do not share current news for it is available on the net for all to read. Neither do we share voice messages or bits of info from other groups or those in circulation, however informative it might be.
We never invite foreign or local speakers to address us. We avoid others of a different upbringing and perception to bring their faith or belief that might not be compatible with our society and thoughts. This is to avoid confusion in our circle over matters and information that could arise out of their visits or delivered by them.
Although we respect all we have never allowed another to take on the role of a guru at ATM, after Supramania Swami and Tavayogi. We have decided we do not want another guru in the flesh. We prefer to look up to Agathiyar to guide us from within, take us on further into the journey of self-discovery and self-realization and into the unchartered territories that have kept all the saints mesmerized and stunned.
This strict conduct of ours has kept this group intact and saved us from people who tend to instigate or poison others minds. On the spiritual path, we have to take all the precaution as it is likened to walking on a sword. A slip and we cut ourselves. These might all sound or be akin to a dictatorship but I believe we have to shield ourselves from the myriad of forces at work, both seen and unseen out there that work with the dark forces in disrupting the harmony and peace that we are praying for. For it is for a reason too that Rama was summoned to stand guard over the sacrificial fires that the Rishis kept feeding.
And to those who sent in their email addresses and asked me to add them in so that they could continue viewing this blog and its postings, thank you very much for coming on this journey and staying with me. We shall explore it much further and much deeper with the grace and mercy of the Siddhas. We are learning from each other at ATM every day. Thank you for coming on this journey. I shall rest and lay down my mantle the day I see worship done in every home.