I had spent sufficient time with Tavayogi and the people who came to him, to enable me to observe, listen and realize what the general public seeked. When Tavayogi arrived in Malaysia in 2005, I went over to his 'lodge' almost everyday he was in town, just to be with him. He seldom spoke. Occasionally I asked him a question or two, but otherwise I did not have any questions. I used to sit and watch all those who came to him. That is when I deduced the mind and the wants of these people.
Some were already aware of the Siddhas while many like me were only beginning to know about them. Many came out of curiosity to see for themselves what was happening. Some just accompanied others.
I realized from observing them, that many came quite well equipped with knowledge, that they had either read elsewhere or had known in the presence of other gurus. They then put a question to Tavayogi, its answer pretty well known to them. When Tavayogi replies, they start comparing notes with their earlier source (either books or former gurus). Then they start mentioning the other source and question why Tavayogi contradicts them. This single question will then be pulled and stretched for hours on end.
Some among them have a fixed notion or opinion about things but yet put the question to Tavayogi, hoping to hear him agree or endorse their thought. If its disagreeable they move on to another guru, seeking a guru who fits into the 'form' they have in mind.
Some came empty and waited for Tavayogi to 'fill them up'. I was one of them, waiting for him to speak, say something that would enlighten me. Even during the last visit to Kallar, my family and I did not have any questions. The only wish my wife had was to ask Tavayogi to conduct a prayer at the ashram where we could participate. Tavayogi, to our surprise asked us to sing the hymns and honored us by doing so.
I took someone I knew to see Tavayogi in Malaysia, hoping that by meeting Tavayogi and listening to him (Tavayogi), he might see a way out of his problems and sufferings. But to our disappointment the man kept churning out his problems continuously, without giving a moment for Tavayogi to speak. During the hour long meeting, Tavayogi only managed to speak three lines. If only the man had stopped to listen he would had got the message. Tavayogi said that all the suffering and hardship the man was going through was because of his past doings and karma (Mun Jenma Vinai). Tavayogi had identified the problem and now gave him a solution. The solution was, "Prayers are the means to overcome your karma" (Potrinaal Unathu Vinai Agalum Appa). If only the man had heeded the advise and had asked to whom he should surrender, Tavayogi would had showed him the way. The way to remove all obstacles was by means of prayers to Siddhas (Siddhargalai Potrungal). But sad to say the man was so engrossed in telling his tale that he refused to 'listen.'
Later I deduced to myself that one should come 'empty' to a guru and wait to be 'filled', very obvious that a vessel has to be emptied first before it could be filled.
Today, I came across Ram Dass posts on this subject at http://www.ramdass.org/faith-in-god/. Ram Dass quotes his Guru Neem Karoli Baba from The Near and The Dear by Dada Mukerjee,
"How can you say that you have got everything and do not want anything more when you are holding an empty vessel in your hand? You might be saying this with your mouth, but there would always be the worry in your mind about how the pot could be filled, always looking from side to side with the expectation that somebody will come and fill it up.'
Even if we have emptied ourselves, the thought of how we will be filled still lingers. That is not total surrender. Looks like you should not even carry an empty vessel with you!
Neem Karoli Baba goes on to explain the notion or idea of contentment,
"Well, how can you call this contentment? When one sees that when the pot before him is full to the brim, it is emptied, and when it is empty, it is refilled of its own – that is contentment. If anyone wanted to give him anything, he would show that the pot was full already. What would he do with anything more? Even if he wanted to share it with others, where would he put it?"
"This is the real contentment and it comes only through the grace of God. When you have full faith in Him, full reliance on Him, when you can surrender everything to Him, then that grace comes to you by itself – you do not have to ask for it or make any effort. Such is the value of faith in God.”
(The above conversation with Neem Karoli Baba, in italic, is reproduced from http://www.ramdass.org/faith-in-god/. Siddha Heartbeat thanks the host of this site.)
Now as I recall all the moments I had had with Tavayogi, I realized that it was time well spent. Most of the time we were silent, until Tavayogi broke the silence to say a thing or two.
But his very presence was 'filling'.