Although I never went looking for gurus, I was blessed to have two gurus in the physical form in my lifetime. Hoping to get answers from the divine I did puja morning and evening. All my search for answers centered around spiritual and religious books that I read. I read a lot and of course, the more I read the more I became confused. What was written in the text did not match with reality. At the brink of going cuckoo, I suppose Lord Shiva took pity on me and came to intervene. He came in a dream and asked me to keep my questions to a later date. I took heed of his advice and decided to stop all reading, engaging in Satsang, discussions, further searching, and worship. That later date he mentioned came some 14 years later. Emptied of all thoughts, opinions, judgments, and previous readings and knowledge, I stood a clean slate before Agathiyar in 2002 when I read my Nadi. I sat in awe as the mystical Nadi revealed about me and my past, my parents and siblings, career and future too. A year earlier the divine missionaries working through their divine machinery passed on to me the Narayana mantra and indicated that I shall meet my guru. Even then I was not excited. But I did as told. Lord Dhakshanamurthy came a few days later in the form of a painting again handed over by my nephew. I observed the Navarathri puja too as told. I came to understand that this was a forerunner to my very first Nadi reading the following year and meeting my guru in the next.
In 2003 I met my guru Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai without even knowing that he was to be my guru. There was neither anticipation nor excitement on meeting him but only sheer joy at sitting at his feet listening to him reveal about me as did Agathiyar in the Nadi. I shed tears for all the blessings. Supramania Swami who was an astrologer ironically did not chart my horoscope but went on revealing my story just sitting there with eyes closed. I was not there to know my future but to have my daughter's horoscope charted. Even after those amazing five hours, I spent with him and after he gave me an initiation mantra, it did not occur to me that I had just been with my guru. All these pieces of the jigsaw puzzle fell into place only after I landed back in Malaysia. I took him to be my guru and we used to snail mail each other and occasionally speak over the phone as it was costly to make calls overseas then and he had to be at the STD booth to receive my return call. This bond between a father and son rather than guru-disciple continued till he passed away on 7.2.2006. Agathiyar in the Nadi told me that he had gone into samadhi. Before his demise, he told me he had seen the Jothi or Light. He had indicated to me that he would leave this world when he was 76 years of age. That too fell into place. He had even noted his exact day of demise in his diary that was recovered by his son after his death.
Two years into knowing Supramania Swami, I met Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal in Malaysia. Driven by the curiosity to know if the name on a pamphlet I had received during my Nadi reading was indeed this visiting Swamiji, I called up the number listed on the advert that made its round daily in the Tamil daily then, announcing the opening of a local chapter of his Agathiyar Gnana Peedham in Kallar, Tamilnadu, India. It was him alright. Just as I began to leave I fell at his feet and was apprehended by him. He told me only to fall at Agathiyar's feet pointing me to a pair of wooden sandals. As I turned my attention to it and placed my hands on them, I burst crying for reasons I did not know. Tavayogi invited me to frequent the local peedham and over to his ashram in India. He invited me to bring along my family later that evening telling me that he would initiate me officially into the Siddha path. Both my wife and I and another six were given Agathiyar's mantra initiation that evening. Yet I was not excited about all these happenings. The excitement began only after I called him over to my home seeing many do so. I was not sure he would accept my invite but he agreed. As I waited to pick him up from his temporary place of residence the excitement in me grew. I could not believe that a guru had agreed to come to my home. Upon arrival, my wife requested him to conduct a small prayer which he did. After speaking to the small circle of family and friends and having lunch, we stepped into the car as my nephew drove us back to his residence. I could not contain my joy and blurted to him my heartfelt thanks telling him that I was overjoyed at receiving him in my home. What I did not expect were harsh words that shook my very core and being. My joy was crashed at that moment. My happiness left me. I chose to remain silent throughout the drive. So did my nephew. Tavayogi had said, "You are living in Maya or illusion. There is nothing within this saffron-colored clothing that I wear. I am not a saint (Samy) but the opposite as in an Asamy. Do not hold on to me but that Jothi or Light that lives in both you and me."
During the next few days, I continued to feel let down asking myself what did I do to deserve those words. But I picked myself up and visited him every day until he left for India. I took heed of his invitation and left for his Kallar ashram a month after he left. Again the excitement started to build in me. Making my second trip to India and getting to see both my gurus brought happiness and joy. As I made my way to Supramania Swami's kudil that we helped build and stepped into it I could not contain my joy in seeing him and fell at his feet crying aloud like a child. He had to pick me up by the shoulders with some difficulty as he was rather a very fragile man. That evening he did a mind-blowing feat by bringing one of his five gurus, Yogi Ramsuratkumar from his samadhi to chant with us! When he went into samadhi Supramania Swami too turned up at my home as confirmed by Agathiyar in the Nadi later. How did he come? As the aroma of tobacco followed by a miscall from his defunct mobile phone number! Not once but twice over two days.
Tavayogi who refused to be paid and given the attention of a saint, made a similar feat when his able cook Nadarajah called him to say that he had seen Tavayogi walk up to their Kallar ashram moments ago as Nadarajah was coming down the small hillock. On nearing him Tavayogi had vanished into thin air! What surprised both of us was that Tavayogi was in Malaysia at that time and I was with him. Making our rounds to the temples stipulated by Agathiyar and more that Tavayogi brought me to, including caves and samadhis, a peddler of rosaries on the grounds of the famed Breehadeswar temple in Tanjavur stepped up to us as we alighted from our ambassador and remarked asking what Tavayogi was doing there again as he had been there the day before! We both looked at each other as we never separated and had only arrived there then!
How do we explain all these phenomena?
Sailing the river adopting the teachings of both my guru now with many more seekers whom Agathiyar sent over to my home, we learned the way of the Siddhas. We can never give enough thanks to our gurus who showed us the way and stepped aside for us to grow and develop individually. Never did they make us their clones. Never did they force their ideas on us. If Supramania Swami was a lone ranger Tavayogi headed a peedham. But never did they suggest or influence me to start a peedham or organization and head them. Neither did I have desire or liking or thought for that. But everything fell in place when Agathiyar ran things the way he wanted. He had seekers sent over to my home after their Nadi readings. Soon to inform them of the dates and times of puja towards the Siddhas that we held, we formed a loose group on WhatsApp that was named Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM). Another group that catered to only local residents was formed and named Amudha Surabhi (AS) to update others on the dates and times of our charity programs. In 2016 Tavayogi and his lead disciple Mataji Sarojini Ammaiyar attended my daughter's wedding and stayed behind to witness and participate in puja and charity both at the homes of devotees of Agathiyar and in selected temples and in the homes of the unfortunate respectively. They were overjoyed in seeing the faith that had grown tremendously over the years among many young devotees. This was a recognition for us although we never expected to be commended for it or asked for applause. I guess Agathiyar decided to gift and shower us with praises. All we can say in reply is a big thank you to all these wonderful gurus and the numerous upagurus who came by. Thank You Very Much.