Traveling the path of the Siddhas, we have come to understand that surrender and dropping the "I" or Ego is a must to progress further. Either can take place first, followed by the other. When man is trashed and trembled and has no place to seek asylum, he looks towards the skies. When he is pushed to the corner he cries out to the divine. When unable to endure extreme pain he calls out to God. In the face of danger, he prays to God. He surrenders in these moments to a bigger power.
Others who are drawn to seek answers arrive at the door of a Guru. A seeker turned a faithful disciple shall experience God in the presence of such mighty Gurus. He surrenders to the Guru willingly seeing a savior in him. The true Guru breaks his last remaining Ego bringing him to lose his "I". He then instructs the disciple on the path to freedom and frees him from enslavement to all things acquired by the "I" by making him drop each of his attachments. Now freed of his attachments, the disciple begins to see himself as a spark of the bigger Atma. The Jeevatma that was a spark of the Paramatma returns to its core with the grace of the Guru and Divine. That is the role of the Guru who has himself transformed into the nature of God. Only those who are ready to have their ego shattered make it to the Guru and hang around long enough to have him chisel and mold them not into his shape or identity, but to become God in essence. Man becomes divine and pure. He becomes a vessel of love, kindness, and compassion taking on the nature of God.
We read Yogi Ramsuratkumar tell us how his master in an alarming and cruel way broke his ego in the previous post. Olga Ammann, in "Yogi Ramsuratkumar - The Mystery of Becoming God" published by Yogi Ramsuratkumar Bhavan Mauritius, 2008 in writing on the Yogi speaks of the Guru and the experiences that he gives us, says,
Bhagavan gives whatever is required when we require it. The Guru does nothing for himself, everything is for us. The desperation we experience, the resentment we feel towards him, and the estrangement we ourselves bring about, all these emotions are natural and necessary stages in the progression towards faith, and are guided by his concern for our growth. In those days and nights, our Yogi, like anyone who walks along the path towards Realization, must have had a number of experiences that are unimaginable for us. These experiences, as he himself affirmed, canceled his identity to the last crumb. They left him totally empty. That is to say, before meeting God, it is necessary that man be shaken by something like a cataclysm, he must be crushed.Trampled and crushed one then surrenders.
“This beggar doesn’t ask Father why. This beggar simply obeys. Father knows. He runs the whole universe”
The most unexpected episode of how a Guru breaks the ego of another is told by Swami Vishnudevananda. He writes on his first encounter with his master Swami Sivananda, in "My Years with the Master" at http://www.sivanandaonline.org.
"As if by chance, I had found a piece of paper that intrigued me. One night when I was working late and was searching for a misplaced paper, I found a small pamphlet in the trash basket. It was called "Sadhana Tattva" and was by Swami Sivananda of Rishikesh. As soon as I read it, my body began to shake. It began with ‘An ounce of practice is worth tons of theory.’ Here was a teacher who was down-to-earth and practical. There was nothing mysterious about his teachings; I felt that I had to meet him for myself. I got a few days leave from the army.I was an arrogant boy on leave from the army. It meant that I had to travel a day and a night from my army base in Jullunder. I would have only a few hours at the Ashram - just to see the Master and then go right back.The first time I saw Swami Sivananda he was sitting with about 30 or 40 people around him. He looked like an ordinary man among them. The look on his face and manner of speech were simple and straightforward. Each word came from his heart. There was no kind of religious hypocrisy, no sitting on a tiger skin with ashes smeared all over his body. He had an extraordinary spiritual glow.The second time, I saw him Swami Sivananda was coming up the stairs in my direction. I didn't want to bow my head to him. I was young and arrogant and never wanted to bow my head to anybody-Swami, God-realised soul or whoever, I didn't care. But it is the tradition in India that you should bow your head to a holy man. To avoid the situation I just moved out of his path.The Master saw me and headed in my direction. He asked me who I was and where I was coming from. Then he bowed down and touched my feet!!My whole body began to shake violently. With all my heart, with all my life and love, I learned to bow without any type of reservation. He touched my heart not with miracles or shows of holiness, but with his perfect egoless nature.He didn't consider that I was just a stupid boy standing there, though I was just that. He touched my heart and broke the ego. That was my first lesson, and if I could attain one millionth of the state of egolessness of the Master, it is His Grace.Before leaving, I went down the Ganga where it was the custom of the Ashram to do Aarati (waving of lights) every evening. All the devotees and inmates of the Ashram assembled by the banks of the Ganga to watch Master perform this evening worship. I was sceptical. I was of a scientific temperament and knew that a river is only water, H2O-imagine worshipping H20!!But as I stood there and watched Master waving the lights, I saw the river become a mass of flowing lights. At that instant the river assumed a divine flow, a manifestation of the Grace of the Lord. Master turned and looked at me and in my mind I heard his message, “God pervades everything; this too is His Special Form.” This entirely changed my outlook on life.
Ram Dass describes his very first meeting with an Indian saint, who was to become his Guru later, and how the saint broke his ego.
"The night before I met Maharaji, I went outside to go to the bathroom. Under the star-filled Indian skies, I thought about my mother who died the previous year of cancer of the spleen. As I was thinking about her, I experienced the powerful feeling of her presence. Telling no one, I kept this meaningful experience to myself. The next day, I met Neem Karoli Baba – that experience changed my life forever…."
Follow the rest of his story at http://www.ramdass.org/meeting-maharaji/ and at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkmOdbJnMGw
My ego was broken and shattered the very day I invited Tavayogi over to my house in 2005. He severed my attachment to him even before it could sprout. Instead, he passed my hand to Agathiyar directly as the father would place the hand of the bride into the palms of the groom asking to take care of his daughter. Then he began to work on me meticulously making me drop all that I held dear and close and cherished, like the Navaratna studded ring on my finger and the Rasamani bead I adorned. During my audience with Thavathiru Rengaraja Desigar in 2003, three years prior to meeting Tavayogi, he chose to ignore me and continued to speak to my driver. Finally interrupting them several times asking to be blessed he told me my coming there itself was a blessing. I was devastated and returned disturbed. I did not understand what he meant. I only came to understand many years later as I matured, the subtle teaching. I believe through foresight he knew I was destined to meet Supramania Swami in a few days. Hence he did not lay his hand on me. Even before Supramania Swami and Tavayogi were shown to me through the Nadi reading in 2002, the young Sivabalan who brought in these Nadi readers had dashed my ego that "I" was the chosen one to build Agathiyar's temple. In 2019, Agathiyar made it known that we can be disposed of at any time. Before the many laurels of fame and pride weighed down on me, and could get into my head he had me dissolve the AVM team on Whatsapp. Before the notion that "I" did charity could sink into us, he dissolved the group Amudha Surabhi. Before we could become addicted to the rituals and got hooked on to doing charity and stagnate, losing sight of the goal that he had in store for us, he brought the entire commune down and had us move out to another terrain, another pasture, another adventure and a journey of going within. He had us forcibly locked up in our homes with the advent of the pandemic. He had us practice Yoga and inquire into the Tattvas, the Breath, the Atma, and the Prapanjam. I was disappointed that some devotees did not or refuse to understand the subtle message that came across to us. There are devotees asking when I am going to call for a Puja, gathering, or Satsangam at Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM). My wish was to see every home become AVM. I would have rejoiced if they had extended an invitation to me and others to join them and their families at puja in their home. I would have rejoiced if they had taken up doing charity with their family. Much as I tried I have failed in trying to break the hold and dependency in gathering at centers.
Surprisingly after two years, Agathiyar extended an invitation to all that he wanted to see them at AVM again now. Maybe he read their thoughts. But only a handful turned up. I was surprised by the poor show in attendance. Maybe the pandemic and fear of contracting the virus have kept them away. We shall give them the benefit of doubt. I believe he has shown me those whom he wants to be part of his annual celebration that he has asked to hold in January.
Having taken numerous births to finally make it as a human and having taken further births to finally discover the Siddha path, many who had finally made it to the door, choose to wait a while outside, preferring to while their time, in further talk and investigation, not wanting to step in as yet. The lure of the material world is so strong that they find it difficult to shake it off. Though they claim that they are on the path of the Siddhas, their faith was distracted by the numerous other paths, gurus, and their teachings. Although they proclaim they have faith in the Siddhas, they do not place trust and confidence in them. Their faith is akin to wanting sureties or guarantees. They wait to see someone come along and take the leap before feeling safe to do so too; or as David Miller says they might insist on checking the ropes and bindings, maybe even consult an engineer, and then watch an elephant cross the rope bridge across the ravine before deciding to do so. Besides the many who kept away the many whom Agathiyar sent over were jewels in the crown. But attracted by the lure of Maya that throws before them the pleasantries and as they are still bound by their duties and responsibilities, the divine and the Siddhas came numerous times to remind them of the pull of Maya. Agathiyar did not wish to throw the harness around them to restrain them anymore nor rope them in forcefully but instead, let them go their way. While some seemed to be lost for direction after the dissolution of the group other picked up the cue and stepped into doing yoga in the confines of their homes besides carrying on their home puja.
When we are so close to arriving at our destiny some give up or give in to doubts and confusion. They question. They hold back. Fatigued and tired out they lose patience. They forget that this might be the last obstacle to cross in the obstacle race or the last remedy to carry out in the series of many long lists given each time they come to Agathiyar. We might be at the threshold of the inner sanctum. What needs to be done is to wait for the veil to be drawn aside. Just as the priest draws the veil aside at the temple and we catch a glimpse or darshan of our favorite deity, the Atma is just behind the veil waiting to redeem us and lead us to the Paramatma that shines with effulgence. Taking a final step would bring the effulgence within and set our Atma ablaze. Just as the fire burns down the home, our physical body or Udal returns to its elements. The Uyir or breath fuels the burning Atma hastening the merger in the Param. It is all a matter of time. We were truly blessed to have a Guru show the path and then step aside. The journey then is ours to pursue. The Guru moves back into his sanctuary satisfied that he has taught another the teachings, or shown another the path and has saved yet another Atma from the clutches of ignorance.