In a multiracial society like Malaysia, we have to be careful how we portray religion to others. Once when I looked for books on the Siddhas at a bookshop that sold other religious insignia too, I told the store attendant to remove the huge granite statues of deities lined up on the floor and place them where we won't bump into them, where our feet and shoes won't knock or kick them accidentally as we reached out for the books lined on the shelves. To make matters worst, sandals although new, were stacked above smaller sculptures of deities, although decorative, and paintings and pictures of deities that occupied a lower row. Surprisingly the good gentlemen listened for on my next visit he had moved all the religious insignia into a newly renovated room where we leave our sandals outside. I never knew people listened to me till then.
A former head of a divine institution that nurtured meditation and the higher sciences in a message said that we needed temples, especially in Malaysia. It was surprising that the statement came from a man who was into Gnanam. How very true. Wipe out the language and the temples and we lose our identities.
This is a far cry from the head of the ashram carrying the name of Agathiyar who confronted me on my idol worship, condemning my practice. It is understandable that he who had put in some 30 to 40 years into the worship of Agathiyar might not need to go back and worship Agathiyar's Murthy or idol. But he should understand that a young aspirant and seeker like me who had just taken baby steps should be encouraged to walk rather than break my legs. He should not have apprehended me and ridiculed the practice.
We need to build and care for the temples as well. We cannot possibly continue the practice of placing them along roadsides and at road intersections or under specific trees anymore. It is acceptable in the country of its origin, where we have our roots, but as we move abroad we need to adapt to the country, its people and take heed of the law and local restrictions.
My sadness and worry is how do I explain to a non-Hindu who walks into the above store and finds the statues of deities whom we hold with high regard and pray to in our homes and temples, on the ground where our feet grazes and kicks them? How do we explain to another that our version of God sits in the open or a makeshift shed battering the weather, where animals and rodents scurry along? After Agathiyar told me to walk with pride since we have come to his fold, how can I accept someone as holy sitting among the trash?
The late actor Vivek tried to knock some sense into our religious practices through the movies. The scene that stands out is where he takes a dig at our practice of worshipping stones, where even the milestone shall become God. Another mind-provoking scene is when he takes a dig again at our practice of hanging lime on a newly purchased vehicle. He asked how can a simple ritual of hanging a lime help keep a vehicle with so many parts on the road?
Yes, we know that the granite statue currently in these stores has not been consecrated hence is not worshiped as God yet. Yes, we understand that our ancestors saw God in everything. Hence we see temples mushrooming everywhere. Yes, we realize that for the saintly he is indifferent to cleanliness or trash as he has gone beyond duality. But a non-Hindu does not know nor does he understand these. The practice and the religion shall be scorned upon by people of other faiths.
Yes, the divine has come down to our level and nature to save us but we should not retain them in the form and space that we are comfortable with. Instead, we should be ready to drop our attachments to even all these religious insignia and prepare ourselves to evolve further and finally leave for the higher realms. This is what every saintly person has been telling us. But many manipulate the message and hold us back, having us rely on forms, names, and establishments.
Agathiyar in revealing my past karma in my very first Nadi reading, explains the reason for another birth.
சாதகனுக்கு முன் உருவில் கேரளா தேசத்தில் முதல் வர்க்க தனவான் செய்யாக. தான் இவனும் ஆலய சேவை செய்ய. செய்யவே வேதம் அதை முறையும் மாற்றிச் சாதகனோ உரைத்திடவே சாபம் பெற்றான். தான் இவனோ இது பிறவி அதனால் தோற்றம்.
There you have it. The reason I had to come back was I had changed the prescribed methods as defined in the Vedas while living as a priest in a temple in Kerala in my last birth. By going against tradition I had incurred the wrath and curses of the elders. Coming to the path of the Siddhas, I for a moment asked myself if I was doing the same now, bringing changes to the practices and rituals in the worship of the Siddhas. But Agathiyar never saw these dynamic changes that we introduced as such. Lord Muruga came and said that I shall do it differently when I asked why he persisted in asking me to build a temple for him. I asked myself could what was perceived as wrong and outlawed in the Vedas be accepted in the Siddha tradition?
There was a time when the authorities were contemplating barring single-occupancy vehicles that were entering the city. This was to reduce the emissions from vehicles and the number of vehicles entering the city. They encouraged carpooling. Today the same authorities have turned the table on us. We are limited to a single person, double or at times full capacity according to the SOP in effect. This change was brought about by the pandemic. Those who were found to have gone against the SOP's and fined during the first movement control order might scorn on seeing that these weren't considered offenses in subsequently amended restrictions. Similarly what was considered taboo might be accepted in the present. What is considered a norm now might become taboo in the future. For instance, the horrific practice of suttee that was prevalent before the arrival of the English in India was banned by them later. This is what Tavayogi describes as Vignanam that is apt to change. That which doesn't change is Meignanam.
In coming to Agathiyar, he broke our hold all many things. Those who understand his play and the message he was driving through his play, shall understand and see the evolution that is taking place in them. Many others who came to the Siddha path seeing it as another alternative to temple worship shall remain in it all live long, rooted to it, and battling and championing the challenges and changes, holding dear to what they professed and followed. Today we understand what Tavayogi meant when he said "Do not remain in Bakhti, you need to progress to Gnanam" the moment he landed and saw our existing religious practices. He asked us to move up the ladder and not stagnate. But when he himself eventually built a temple for Agathiyar, and I questioned him as to the need to build a temple, he answered that it was not for him but for others. Today I understand that those "others" are our grandchildren who need a place to turn to and learn the path too. We shall not be around to groom and guide them on the rituals that we carried out at AVM. By stopping him from going into Samadhi and redirecting him to Malaysia for our sake, we saw the birth of his ashram cum temple. By leaving behind these establishments our children and grandchildren shall someday come across our writings, photos, and videos and recall a faint memory of their granddad doing a homam or abhisegam or chanting the names of the Siddhas or visiting his ashram, might seek to know further about the path from these establishments. Having built his temple, we only saw a few trickling in. Agathiyar tells us that only those who seek Gnanam shall make their way to Kallar ashram hence clearing our worries as to why it wasn't a crowd puller from day one.
Tavayogi had a purpose and a mission. On the other hand, a stranger stood in front of Supramania Swami's kudil and questioned him as to the need to build a temple. He confronted Swami telling him not to step back into bhakti or devotion as he was already a Gnani. I understood that although it was a 40-year-old desire of his, the divine did not sanction it as it wasn't his purpose in life nor neither his mission. So it all boils down to what our divine purpose is. Most of us live without a purpose till our last breath. Many establish a purpose that is usually drawn towards materialistic life. Very few listen to the true purpose that is revealed from within them or the divine.
When Tavayogi at each juncture told me "We do not need that, son" for instance brushing away the need to wear a rudraksham or a gemstone, etc it wasn't a dogma or teaching or regime to be followed by others. He was addressing only my soul. It was meant only for me. It did not apply to others since Suresh who asked if he could wear a piece of Rudraksha that he held in his hand, was given the green light to do so. It was not wrong for another to adorn a rudraksha or a gemstone. As for me, I needed to take my next step and evolve further. I needed to drop my hold on everything external in order to move on. Just as the baggage of karma we brought with us and carried on our shoulders was relieved, we have to lay down all the unnecessary tools, practices, and understanding and move into newer frontiers. There we shall pick up new things that we shall have to put down later too. This is the evolution of the soul. When Agathiyar tells me to worship his Murthy and bring others to worship him, he is teaching us to move a step further in worship and devotion. If we frequented temples thinking that God resides behind its walls Agathiyar broke that notion and brought the kingdom of Gods within our living room. He showed us that the divine that is present in temples can come into our homes too. He brought us from Sariyai into Kriyai. With the coming of Tavayogi we picked up the rituals and conducted them just as it was done in temples. Our homes became temples too with the attendance of the deities 24/7. These religious insignias were not only tools to bhakti or devotion but enhanced us. With faith and belief, practice and discipline, and with their grace and compassion, it helped transform us from a servant of God to become his son. Later in having us pick up from where we left the practice of Yoga he came as a companion.
We learn that everything has a purpose in life as we are told in the National Geographic's episode on "Cosmos: Possible Worlds." We are each a strand in a large fabric. Just as when we are hurt the cells rush to repair the torn tissue, when there is a tear in this fabric that is family and community, family members and fellow men rush to amend it respectively. Similarly, society and nations come to the aid of others in servicing and helping those in places of devastation. But eventually, when the cloth is beyond repair and has to be thrown away and replaced with another we shall see that day a new world shown to us for us to inhabit and reside on. Similarly, the physical body that has been scared beyond repair has to drop for the soul to be released and move into another birth and another body. But the reluctant soul holds on to its false pride, false understanding, and false notion. It holds on to what it sees as princely possessions be it property, cash, or position, and struggles to let go of these. It is then a long battle before he passes away. That which is truly valuable in the eyes of the saints is the very body that is needed to carry on living. The human birth is rare we are often told. Hence we are told to cherish it. It is the means to enlightenment.