Friday 1 September 2023

LENDING AN EAR

In the opening scene of the movie "A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood," a question is posed by Lloyd Vogel who writes for a magazine.

"Why do we write for magazines for a living? Honestly because doing anything else doesn't seem quite like living at all. We get a front-row seat to history. We get to expose the truth that others cannot see. And sometimes, just sometimes, we get to change a broken world with our words." 

I love the last part.

 Lloyd interviews Fred Rogers, the host of a children's program.

"It seems like all these people line up to tell you their problems."
"Oh, isn't it wonderful? Such bravery."
"Well, it seems like that would be an incredible burden on you."
"I'm grateful for you saying that Llyod. I am grateful for your compassion."
"Is it a burden on you?"
"There is no normal life that is free from pain."

It reminds me of my dilemma when strangers walked up to my home and spoke about their problems and how difficult it was for me to go on listening. When I saw it as a burden Agathiyar reprimanded me. He asked me where would I go if he were to shut his ears? He wanted me to listen to others' problems. But I was in a dilemma since Tavayogi had told me to send them to Agathiyar. What should I do? Who should I listen to? My daughter made me realize that he was listening to others through me when she shared how sick her friend was with me. She had also shared about how Agathiyar healed many and had asked her friend to come by. My daughter believes that though her friend did not come around for a healing Agathiyar heard and had her admitted to a hospital that managed to treat her problem. She has recovered well and has settled down in marriage. 

"How do you deal with it?"
"Oh, there are many ways. You can deal with your feelings without hurting yourself or anybody else."
"Yeah like what?"
"Well, you can pound a lump of clay or swim as fast as you can swim or play the lowest keys on the piano all at the same time."
"Do you talk to anybody about the burden you carry?"
Fred imitates playing the lowest keys on the piano all at the same time.

This movie was a lesson on anger management for me. I had a boss at the office who would not argue back but would fetch his briefcase and leave the office. He believed the tension subsides when we leave the scene. It is always the response that triggers our anger further. We are not enemies. No one is. It is just that when we do not see eye to eye with one another we become enemies. A fight almost always starts with a difference in opinion. If we can accept somebody's way of life or opinion we are friends otherwise we are enemies.

My granddaughters love me for what I am. If the elder one used to ask me to the extent of begging me to play with her when she was younger, now the second one is doing the same. The older is 6 and the younger is 3. I quipped the other day that she did not respect me for my age. "I am 63 and you are three," I told her. They have me crawl under the blanket and play out Wolf and the Piglets, Wolf and the Lambs, and play out many more stories. But it gives us a feeling of being wanted. They shall grow up very soon into young ladies and have no time for us. As it is the elder speaks less these days as she has gone to school and met new friends. In the past, all the friends they had were the many soft toys that they gave names to, and of course, the grandfather who played with them.

Fred Roger has a message for those who cannot leave eating meat. 

"Are you a vegetarian?"
"I just can't imagine eating anything with a mother."

Another message that came across in this movie was that my neighbor helped me become who I am. My enemies helped me become what I am. My friends and family shaped me.

Maybe sharing these wonderful thoughts brought to the silver screen in these writings would go some way to change a broken world as Lloyd says or mend a broken heart or might change the broken world of some readers. Anyway, I am glad to continue writing as I have nothing else to do these days. I chauffeur my daughter to work and fetch her back twice a week. I hardly go out the rest of the week except to drop in on my grandchildren or buy some groceries. Life has been good to me. Thank you for listening to me.