I used to wonder how my life would have turned out if it was not for Agathiyar's entry. I would be following others making it a point to drop in at the temples on Tuesdays and Fridays and other auspicious days if only for my children's sake, for I was given an order by Lord Shiva to keep all my questions to a later date when I was cooked up in the agamas, religions, customs, and traditions, to the point that I might have become an atheist or gone cuckoo over the inconsistency and lack of answers from the learned, the texts and God himself. It was God who saved me that day, in 1988, asking me to take a break. It ended up being a very long break indeed.
There was I happily going about with my job that I loved doing and my small family that I loved equally. When Agathiyar came, my family followed behind in his worship and many others came by. While some left, many stayed. We became the AVM family as my home came to be known as Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia. Though it was his Vanam or garden, Agathiyar made sure that the place was off the map. Since 2019 all the activities carried out in the past at AVM have come to a standstill including puja, charity, Satsang, and gatherings. Everyone went, their way. Those whose lives were touched by Agathiyar still come over. Today it remains open for these exclusive few to come together and sing his praise and share their stories and miracles.
Watching her life depicted and portrayed in the movie, "Letters from Mother Teresa", we learn that "To her, she was just a servant of God. God using her nothingness for his greatness." Thus "Mother Teresa had requested letters she wrote be destroyed fearing that, to quote her, "When the beginning will be known people will think more of me and less of Jesus." I recall how Tavayogi destroyed my joy the day I invited him to my home so that I would not revel him but instead take hold of Agathiyar.
Watching her story and following Tavayogi's life, I understood that in doing good, the "other side" comes to tear apart all the good we do or obstruct the good being done. Tavayogi had a fair share of problems and troubles in his missionary work. When Agathiyar was bound for Malaysia, he told me that he had to tear down obstacles to arrive at my home, which pretty much surprised me. When Tavayogi asked me to fetch water for the libation of Lord Ganapathi's statue before starting the Siddha puja that was requested by his guru Chitramathu Adigal, put forth to Agathiyar and that was read in the Jeeva Nadi in the possession of Tavayogi for a devotee, he asked me to have someone accompany me for he said that the "other side" shall sabotage us. I was puzzled but did as told.
Our problems would not go away I suppose. As Mother Teresa recites the peace prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi, which was written some 400 -500 years ago at the Nobel Peace Prize ceremony, she says that it was very much relevant in her times too. "And you know I always wondered if 400-500 years ago when Saint Francis of Assisi composed the prayer that they had the same difficulties as we have today because it is very fitting for us also."
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace:
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy.
O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
(Source: https://www.cathedralstm.org/)
I think no one can fit into her shoes. She is indeed a saint.