Vaalai has opened up the airways in me. What was forcibly opened through the practice of Pranayama is spontaneous now. Now I understand what Agathiyar meant when he told me to let it be and it shall do its work when I had a sudden burst of energy awakened by his touch in 2022.
I guess the three dosas are kept in check these days as the throwing up has stopped. The body aches that were there for some good two weeks and left was back yesterday. Everything in sight is crystal clear these days. The senses are heightened. The taste buds are in optimal performance. The sense of smell too has heightened. Hearing has gone beyond the walls. Touch too is deep and overwhelming these days. I am picking up the sound of electricity flowing through and feeling the vibrations that it emits. Sexual urges are in overdrive. Listening to songs be it devotional or cinema touches the very souls and brings tears too. Compassion has taken another level as it is impossible to see violence portrayed even on the screen. Just 13 minutes into watching the documentary "Born in Gaza" brought tears into my eyes and I could not watch any further. A lad tells us how his 22-year-old brother was hit in a bombing while delivering beverages produced at their father's soft drink factory. He holds out his hand to show us the size of the largest piece that they found of him.
I tend to just slip into a state of "Nothingness" holding the pose for minutes on end without engaging with the senses and its organs of interpretation. My attention is automatically drawn to the breath in these moments. Neale Donald Walsch in his book "The Wisdom of the Universe" writes, "There's nothing I have to have, there's nothing I have to do, and there is nothing I have to be, except exactly what I'm being right now." I guess this is the state of "Being" that is spoken about. We are told to let this "Being" in us awake. This is the Soul in us. This is Atma Darisanam or the Awakening of the Soul. When the Soul awakens it drives the body and the Tattwas to work for it. Let it will what we should do henceforth rather than letting the Ego be in charge. If the Ego drives the body and its Tattwas to move us in the opposite direction, the Soul that is the property of the Good Lord shall guide us back to him.
Over the weekend Agathiyar and Lord Murugan have showed me how difficult it is for the common man and even the spiritual inclined and the spiritual heads to let go. Every single person is holding on to something out of love, passion, and greed or shackled to responsibilities, forgetting that the simplest thing or action is letting go. Though accumulating wealth and possessions could take ages, letting go can happen in a second if one intended. But the pull of power, authority, respect, money, wealth, and happiness has such a tight hold on us that it has become impossible to just let go.
We learned the truth of what Neale writes in his book.
"Scientists conduct an experiment and simply show you what they have done. The results speak for themselves. Not so with politicians. Even if they failed, they talk. The same for religious leaders. The more they fail the more they talk. Yet I tell you this. Truth and God are found in the same place. In the silence. When you have found God and when you have found truth, it is not necessary to talk about it. It is self-evident."
Today is a day of celebration and happiness and above and beyond that a day of lighting up our homes and our lives. It is Deepavali or Diwali, the festival of Lights. Though the whole world celebrates it I would give precedence to another much lesser-known festival associated with harvest of crops Thai Ponggal. It is only when we shed the old, throw out the old, and burn the past that newer options arise and can move into our lives. It is only in letting go of the old that the new can come within. Thai Pongal celebrates all the above. After the home is cleansed, we can then let in the light. This applies to the internal transformations too. In order for the body to take on the form of light, it has to be transformed through a thorough cleansing, that might even require the very dwelling to be brought down first and rebuilt.
Swami Vivekananda says that first the nerves have to be purified. I understand the bodily pains that I am undergoing currently. The nerves that have formed knots have to be carefully undone and straightened. These have to be strengthened then to take on the current that would be plying through them. The very cells have to be purified so that the body transforms from an impure Asudha Deham to a pure Sudha Deham. Empty out the cloud or hard disk in which we have come to store years of data or rather junk so that the Soul can fill it up with new and uplifting experiences or even better upgrade it or replace it.
Neale says that there is a difference between doing a certain thing out of happiness and the other that is to do something that brings happiness in us. Children tend to fall into the first category while we adults fall into the latter. Love mooting us to give is different from giving to gain another's love. Rather than find the means to be happy, why not just be happy. Do we need a tool or gadget to create happiness in us and our surroundings? Rather than go in search of God we could learn to see him in us and our loved ones and the surroundings. We have never seen our faces. We always needed a mirror. Or we saw our reflection in the waters. We always needed something else to show our true face. Watching the movie "Irugapatru" I saw myself standing before the mirror.
On this day where the whole world celebrates the advent of Light should we not keep our homes, neighborhoods, streets, towns, cities clean to usher the light and drive away the darkness? Should we not keep the streams, rivers and oceans clean? Should we not care for the quality of the air around us? Should not we respect the privacy of others? Now moving within, should not we make our bodies conducive and prepared to receive the Light? With God's blessings that come via Sariyai and Kriyai and our efforts in Yogam, the Light of Divine knowledge or Gnanam shall dawn on us eventually. That day calls for a true celebration.