When Agathiyar cut me off from the mainstream worship and had me go solo, telling me that the path was now narrow and only one could walk at a time, though it did not make much sense back then, it is pretty obvious now that spiritualism was not like the academies and higher institutions that produce graduates in large numbers. It is a solo journey of self-discovery. I understand now why Tavayogi did not preach the way but let us discover it for ourselves. He did not have us confined to codes, rules, do's, and do not's. We were given the freedom to explore. In fact, he once told me that the soul cannot be caged. It must be set free to explore. Adopting this fact, we shall accept that we should not interfere with the divine work and its play unless called for. Hence we see saints adopt a stand of noninterference, keep to themselves, and accept all that comes their way and also those happening around them. It all is for a purpose as Sadhu Om often expresses in his songs. We are told in the documentary depicting the journey of discovery that the Buddha took, "Discovery of the Lands of Buddha" that "Life is not a problem to be resolved but a Reality to be experienced."
Just as Marie Dubois traveled the path taken by the Buddha, Tavayogi took me to the places and abodes where he and the Siddhas had dwelled in the past. It was truly a privilege walking with the guru and having the Siddhas usher us as he pointed out to me. It was truly a privilege to learn about his experiences much of which has been shared in these pages.
We learn from this documentary that "Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else. You are the one that gets burned." Indeed Agathiyar spent an hour in the past speaking about anger management in my Nadi reading. He told me that all the merits gained through my austerities or Tavam would be ruined by anger. Ramalinga Adigal says that the very cells in us shall boil in the heat of our anger.
A fellow seeker came to me asking why the mantra he was given in his Nadi differed from what was given to me by Agathiyar. Another fellow seeker came to me asking if she should carry out a remedy given by a spiritual head. Both never got to do it for they were doubting them. Another fellow student who learned Yoga from Tavayogi too was asked to re-learn it from me in his Nadi reading for he had left practicing it thinking it was just another of many ordinary practices. Agathiyar told me that it was a heritage that Tavayogi had passed on to us. Even today whenever he comes he asks devotees if they are doing these Asanas and Pranayama. Asking those gathered to look around and see for themselves how the grey hairs on my head were turning black again, Agathiyar asked what further magic he needed to do. The magic took place from within. Having faith in him and traveling the path for the past 22 years is showing off its results. He wants me and my wife to get married again. Now why would he want us to do that? As Indian couples who have stayed together long enough reenact their wedding ceremony when the male attains the age of 60, I guess he wants us to do the same. He has asked us to gather family and friends on Guru Purnima day which falls on Sunday, 21 July 2024.
Although when we seek a second opinion or ask around if something should be done after receiving instructions from a spiritual leader, it only shows a lack of faith in his words, Buddha says "Doubt everything, even what I will tell you. Find your own Light." Tavayogi too had told us not to accept the words of the Siddhas at face value but to ponder its inner meanings and know for ourselves. A master does not do the magic. It is us. In giving us an initiation, giving us a practice, or showing us a solution, he initiates us on a new journey, That is all he does. We have to diligently work on the mantra or practice or carry out the solution and begin to walk the path. We create the magic or rather the magic unfolds once we get started working on it.
All the questioning initially is to remove our doubts and build up our faith. It should end there. We should be at peace with our state of belief and thoughts. We should not carry on with this mode of questioning forever. Just as Jason Gregory says of Bhagawan Ramana's teachings on inquiry, it is only to ignite the fire in us and not to be pursued lifelong. We need to progress further and advance into other stages or levels awaiting us.
"When people used to go and sit with Bhagawan Ramana Maharshi, they would ask him how do we attain the silence and the splendor that you have embodied? How do we abide in the Atma?"
"He (Ramana) would have this preliminary stage to till the soil in your mind so that you could get to a level where you start to feel the Atman .... and that preliminary stage was Atma Vichara or Self Inquiry. So he would give this practice to people ... This is a preliminary stage and for those people who could not understand his silence...You do not remain in the inquiry forever."
We are no saints, we must constantly watch out for the pitfalls and mines laid out on the path. One careless move could ruin a lifetime of work or rather many lifetimes of work. Agathiyar often says not to take for granted that the next birth will be a human birth. Ramalinga Adigal lists a long list of sins and asks if he had done those that brought forth another birth. We need to remind ourselves not to step into the quicksand that draws us further in. This is a reminder to me too. This blog and the writings serve as a reminder to me too. I too am traveling with you, fellow readers and seekers to the promised land.
Watching documentaries on nature and animals makes us humble. We realize that nature is intelligent. Learn to see God in nature for it is his creation. We see his touch in nature. We see his magic in nature. And indeed it is a joke that we claim ourselves to be superior and above all others.
Then there is that ego in us that differentiates others and places us superior to others when we tread the path of religion and spirituality. But Agathiyar humbles us at every juncture giving us a knock on the head with his staff. The soul of the atheist father of the staunch devotee of Agathiyar who passed away several days ago, was accepted in the folds of the Siddhas. This news was related in a Nadi reading subsequent to his passing to his daughter by Agathiyar. Agathiyar added that they were blessed to have had these parents and vice versa their parents too were blessed to have these three daughters. He shall be remembered by all those who knew him, including me.
There is nothing to achieve here. Rather it is all about returning home. All fame and fortune shall have to be shed or left behind when death comes knocking. Yes, you shall be remembered for some time. But remember that man has a short memory and he remembers little of us.
"We are what we think. All that we are, arises from our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world" - Buddha
Buddha's final words were "Everything you see in the universe is ephemeral. Everything created by man is ephemeral and will be destroyed. You must accept that and work on your own wisdom. That is all."
Ramalinga Adigal echoes the same too.